Chapter 36
EVELINA
“I’m so sorry.”
Vaughn is motionless in the living room as he grips the back of the leather chair. His head is bowed, his shoulders tense.
I swallow the lump in my throat as I walk a little closer to him.
“I…” I shake my head. “Vaughn, I had no idea it would be like that. I didn’t know…your life back then…”
He slowly turns to face me, and a cold shiver ripples down my spine at the raw pain and anger on his face. His eyes look haunted as he grits his teeth, shaking.
“How,” he rasps out, the ice in his blue eyes fracturing like shattered glass. “How do you have any possible forgiveness for your father after what he put you and your family through?”
I wince.
“After what he did to your brother?” he chokes. “To mine?!”
I shudder as a tear slides down my cheek. “I’m sorry—”
“I don’t want you to fucking apologize,” he says tightly. But there’s no malice in his voice, and when I really take in the emotions on his face, I realize he’s not furious and vengeful.
It’s an actual question.
“Genuinely,” he says, his voice thick as he swallows. “How the fuck do you forgive someone for putting you through something like that? How do you reconcile shit like that against that person whose supposed to be your fucking parent?”
“I don’t know,” I whisper. “Just—he's my dad. I can’t hate him.”
Vaughn exhales and then walks around to lower himself heavily into the chair. Without a word, I cross the room and sit on the arm of it. Then his arm slides around my waist, pulling me into his lap.
“I—” I wince. “I thought…I mean, I did think ambushing you would be this silly thing where you’d begrudgingly have lunch with him. I'm so sorry.”
“You didn’t know,” he growls. “How would you. Val doesn’t remember it, and I don’t share that part of my life with anyone.”
His phone buzzes. He sighs heavily, then reaches into his jacket pocket to pull it out. I’m not trying to snoop, but I can’t help but see “Sabine” on the screen.
“Not even with Sabine?” I say tightly.
He turns to me. “That sounds like jealousy, princess.”
I look away. “Look, I know we’re not…whatever. But you have this girl who sometimes lives with you, who hates me—no, she really does—and who obviously adores you.”
“And that makes you jealous.”
“Yes,” I finally snap, turning back to him. “Yes, it makes me jealous.”
He looks at me carefully. “Should I be jealous of Roman?”
My brow furrows. “What?”
“Have you ever fucked him?”
My face wrinkles. “Ew. Obviously not.”
“Well, there you go,” he shrugs. “I have about as much interest in sleeping with or doing anything romantic with Sabine as you do with Roman.”
My mouth purses.
Vaughn sighs. “Just say it.”
“What?” I mutter.
“Whatever you’re thinking. Spit it out.”
I huff. “Fine. Do you seriously believe that she lost her phone right before someone lured me out of the theater on campus and then tried to kill me?”
“Nope.”
I stare at him. “What?!”
He shrugs. “No, I don’t believe that.”
My jaw drops. “So she’s working with—”
“No,” he shakes his head. “She’s not. Do I think Sabine tried to sabotage us meeting up by texting you herself that I wanted you to go back to the city?
” He shrugs. “Yes. But there’s zero chance she was working with that motherfucker who tried to hurt you later.
I think another enemy of mine capitalized on the sheer bad luck of finding you walking outside alone that night. ”
My jaw drops. “Bad luck? Vaughn, the timing—”
“Sabine’s guilty of being dangerously overprotective and more than a little selfish when it comes to me. Not of conspiring to get you hurt or killed. She didn’t say anything afterward because she knew how it would look.”
I shake my head slowly. “You really believe that.”
“Sabine’s like a sister to me, Evelina,” he growls. “Her father, Stellan, was my mentor. Two years ago, he was killed in a bomb blast orchestrated by Diego Torvallés. The same blast paralyzed Sabine and put her in that wheelchair.”
My face falls, my heart clenching as he takes my hand.
“That is why she and I are so close. It’s why I take care of her, why she lives with me sometimes…” He smiles wryly. “For the record, she doesn’t know about my childhood, either. No one except Val and Morgan know that.” His hand tightens around mine. “And now you.”
I squeeze his hand back.
“I’m so sorry,” I whisper. “About what happened to Stellan, and Sabine.”
He nods.
“Is that why you killed Andrés? Payback?”
His mouth twists into a small smile.
“What I did in those woods was because he put his hands on you,” he says. “Because he was trying to hurt you.”
I don’t know what makes me do it. But one second, I’m sitting in his lap, holding his hand, and the next, I’m cupping his face and kissing him.
“Can we please clear the air?” I murmur as I pull back. “I mean, between my disaster of a lunch surprise and not understanding your relationship with Sabine…” I sigh. “Can we do dinner tonight? Just you and me?”
Vaughn’s brow arches. “That sounds suspiciously like a date, princess.”
“And if it is?”
He frowns. “Evelina, I don’t do da—”
“Then don’t call it a date,” I grin, biting my lip and poking his firm chest.
He glares at me. But then I see the frost cracking around the edges as his lips curl into a quiet smirk.
I grin. “I’m getting to you, aren’t I?”
Silence follows the ring of the buzzer as I pull my hand back. I’ve decided to continue on my quest of clearing the air and pay someone a little visit at home before my don't-call-it-a-date with Vaughn.
“Hello?” Sabine’s voice calls through the intercom.
She does stay at Vaughn’s penthouse from time to time. And she really does like his mansion up in the Adirondacks. But she also has her own place on the Upper West Side now, near the Columbia University campus.
That’s where I am.
“Hey, Sabine?” I clear my throat. “It’s Evie.” I frown. “Um, Evelina? Nikitin?”
The intercom goes silent for a long moment.
“What do you want?”
Well, this is going awesome.
“I was just in the neighborhood, and—”
“How did you find out where I live?”
I smile. “Our…mutual friend?”
She sighs heavily.
“Look, I just…” I frown. “I think we got off on the wrong foot—”
“Is that meant to be a fucking wheelchair joke, asshole?” she snaps.
Shit.
“No!” I blurt. “I’m sorry, terrible choice of words. I’m just…nervous, I think?” I sigh. “Can I come in? I really do just want to talk.”
Another long silence.
“Give me a minute.”
I step away from the intercom, grinning and nervously tapping my foot. Finally, the door buzzes and unlocks, and I step inside.
Sabine’s door is open when I get off the elevator upstairs. I walk into a super cool, artsy space with brick walls, big factory windows, and steps leading up to a lofted area.
“Wow,” I whistle, looking around as I shut the door behind me. “This place is amazing. That loft!”
Sabine is turned to face me by a lowered sitting/standing desk near the windows. “Yeah, the stairs up to the loft come in very handy,” she says dryly.
I smile awkwardly before I nod to the lofted area. “Do you have guests a lot?”
“If I do?” she snaps.
I frown. “Sorry, I wasn’t…I just mean, the bed up there…?”
“Yeah,” she finally says. “I have friends who stay over sometimes.”
I nod, turning to look around her space again.
“Why are you so nervous?” she asks, cocking a brow at me.
I sigh. “Look, I know you didn’t lose your phone that night.”
She frowns. “Yes, I—”
“And Vaughn does, too.”
Her mouth snaps shut, her face paling.
“But he also knows you didn’t have anything to do with what happened after I left the theater.”
Her lips purse. “What do you think?”
I smile. “I think if he of all people trusts someone, I probably should, too.”
Her eyes drop to her lap.
“Look, I know you don’t like me, because you’re so protective of him.
I get it,” I continue. “I’ve been like that my whole life with my big brother, Roman.
Even when he was coming out and falling in love with a close friend of mine, I was suspicious of that friend’s intentions.
I mean, Val is literally one of my besties, and I was still second guessing why he was with Roman.
” I smile wryly. “I love him, and you worry about the people you love. You protect them, even if it makes you come off as a little crazy.”
Sabine eyes me. “Are you saying I come off as a little crazy?”
“Yeah, girl,” I blurt, laughing a little, then again when I see her biting back a smile of her own. “But I get why, and…” I shrug. “I just wanted you to know that.”
She inhales slowly, drumming her fingers on the arm of her wheelchair. “So… What are your intentions with Vaughn?”
“I honestly don’t know,” I sigh. “I wish I had a better answer for you. But I can tell you… I really like him. I feel safe with him. I feel seen and heard in a way I’ve never been before. I miss him when I’m not around him. I think about him when we’re apart. And I feel whole when we’re together.”
My eyes widen as I realize the full gravity of what I’ve just said.
“Sorry,” I mumble. “That was…”
“A little crazy?” she smirks.
I nod. “Maybe a little.”
Sabine’s brows knit. “I’m sorry I sent that text. I truly, truly had no idea—”
“Think we could start over?” I say hopefully.
“Depends. Do you think it’s too early for a glass of wine?”
I eye her wryly. “Is this the part where you pretend to be my friend and drug me again?”
She squirms and turns red, but then we both laugh.
“But, no,” I shake my head. “Not too early.”
“You can even pour if it’ll make you feel better,” she grins. “In the fridge,” she adds, nodding past me.
I walk around the corner of the loft and into the kitchen area. I find some Chardonnay in the fridge, and glasses in a cabinet. My brows knit as I set them on the regular height counter and pour the wine.
“How long have you had this place?” I call out.