42. The Rookie
The Rookie
CARTER
Tatum dropped his loaded barbell to the ground with a thud. “Someone’s in a good mood today.”
“Fuck yeah, I am,” I grunted, watching the sweat trickle down my brow in the gym mirror as I dropped into another repetition.
“I nearly cleared my PR.” The feel of a good workout had always been meditative for me, but I was especially grateful my body was mostly back to normal and I was feeling stronger than ever.
“It’s just a matter of time.” I added more to myself, forcing that sliver of doubt out of my mind.
“Obviously.” Tatum agreed, chugging from his water bottle.
“Oh,” I added nonchalantly, though I was anything but, “And the love of my life is flying in this weekend.” On the private jet I’d bought just for her, but I didn’t mention that little detail to Tatum.
“Ah, there it is.” He shot me a mischievous look. “I’m actually surprised you’re going so hard today.”
I could sense an incoming jab, but I humored him anyway. “Why’s that?” I huffed, dipping into my next repetition.
Tatum grinned wide and made a vulgar gesture, lifting his spread fingers to his tongue. “You’re going to wear yourself out before she does.”
I choked on my laughter, nearly throwing my back out as I quickly racked the bar, bracing against my shaky legs to catch my breath. Dirty motherfucker. But it was true. Sara wanted to go at mock speeds—I smiled, having never considered it quite like that before.
“Good luck with that, Casanova.” Tatum snickered, “Don’t go too hard, or next week is going to be a bitch.” He considered for a moment, his expression turning more sobering. “Or maybe in that case… do. Last hurrahs and all.”
I grimaced. This would be the last time I’d see Sara before I deployed. While it was good to be back to work as usual, the thought of being away from her for so long made my chest ache in a way I didn’t know it could.
“I can’t help it. I have zero willpower when it comes to her.” I panted, lifting the bar again, fingers flexing over the grooved metal grips.
“That’s how I knew Jillian was the one .” Tatum said, heading for the locker rooms.
The one.
I didn’t even bother shooting back a clever remark because I think a part of me knew the truth of that statement. A part of me had always known I felt that way about Sara. I just hadn’t allowed myself to admit it . As hard as I’d tried to stay away from her, I just couldn’t do it anymore.
I dipped low and dug into my heels as I forced myself to rise and then do it all over again. Sara was consuming me, dragging me into her orbit like gravity itself.
Selfishly, I didn’t want to fight it anymore.
She occupied my mind, day and night. The sound of her laugh, the dimple on her left cheek when she was being snarky. The feeling of her curls tangled around my fist while I kissed her. The whiny, frustrated sounds she made when I whispered very, very dirty things into her ear, even over the phone.
I wanted to give her the moon on a string. Wanted to give her everything money could buy, and anything it couldn’t. I tried not to get ahead of myself, but she was going to be here this weekend, and when I got my hands on her.
I was so whipped.
“I’m happy for you, Casanova. You deserve it.” Tatum chuckled over his shoulder. “You finally grew a pair.”
“You should try it sometime.” I shot back, hating that he might be the tiniest bit right.
“Don’t need to.” He turned in the doorway and over his athletic shorts, gripped his sack proudly. “Robert and Bobert locked Jillian down a long time ago.”
“You named your balls?” I quirked a brow and teased. “Poor Jillian.”
“You mean lucky Jillian.” He motioned palms up and disappeared down the hallway with a grin.
I huffed out a laugh and dropped into another repetition. Anything to take the edge off. I needed to wear myself out—needed to try and keep some ounce of control when it came to my darling, Sarafina Amara Devereux. Which was next to impossible.
Sara simultaneously made me feel like the weakest man alive for not being able to resist her, while also making me feel invincible, like if she believed in me, I could literally do anything. Be anything. Have anything.
Including having a family again.
I shook my head, almost not daring to admit it, even to myself.
It was something I’d decided a long time ago that I was never going to have again. A family.
When my parents had left me alone in this world, it’d taken everything in me to keep going. To survive, I’d had to wall myself off completely.
I’d been pretty successful too, not letting anyone get too close. Sure, I’d been with plenty of other women over the years, but it had been about the sex. Strictly a physical moment of release and never anything deeper.
Which was one of the many reasons I was so adamant about taking things so slowly with Sara.
I wanted to build that emotional foundation with her.
Because whether she realized it or not, she’d found all the dark, ominous cracks in my heart and easily slipped through every wall I’d ever built. It was terrifying.
The thought of building a family with Sara, not to mention picturing Sara pregnant with my dark-haired babies, which was sexy as fuck to fantasize about, filled me with a strange and unfamiliar hope. I, of course, was getting way ahead of myself.
All of it was unnerving, because feelings and shit, but for the first time in my life, I felt like I belonged to someone. Her.
And she sure as hell belonged to me. That girl was all mine .
My muscles were shaking as I forced out another repetition, forced the jittery feelings in my chest to settle because I had to ask her something important this weekend.
Because girlfriend had to come before the four-letter word I couldn’t shake out of my brain.
The word that made me hard just thinking about it. Wife.
Sarafina
“Are you ready, Miss Deveruex?” Vaughn, my new security guard, asked, coming into my class to collect me.
“I thought we discussed that you would wait outside my classes.” I practically hissed, and I stuck my hand up, cutting off his gruff voice. “I know. I know.” I grumbled. “Where you go, I go.” I mimicked his useless explanation for everything.
The moment Liam had dropped me back off at school, there had already been private security set up for me.
As much as I hated it, that note in my father’s office had been wildly unsettling.
If I could admit it to myself, I hadn’t been able to shake the feeling that someone had been following me.
I knew I was probably just being paranoid, but it was hard not to be.
I murmured my goodbyes to Carmen, and her cheeks flushed as she gobbled Vaughn up from head to toe with a glazed stare. I was shocked to see him give her a smirk before he practically dragged me out into the hallway. He looked halfway human when he wasn’t scowling like his life depended on it.
Outside, I asked venomously sweetly, “So how was your day?” I was pissed as hell that he’d already broken the rules we’d agreed upon.
Vaughn ignored me altogether as he all but shoved me into the bulletproof SUV and then abruptly closed the door on me.
Jerk. I rolled my eyes as we headed for the airport, and a swell of excited nerves suddenly hit me.
I was dying to see Carter this weekend, especially with his upcoming deployment closing in, but honestly, there was a terrified part of me that wasn’t exactly sure what we were doing.
We hadn’t discussed being exclusive, and I’d been too afraid to ask.
I sure as hell wasn’t seeing other people, but it didn’t escape me that Carter had options. He always had.
The minute he’d turned eighteen, the tabloids had named him the city’s most eligible bachelor—they still ran stories about him, even now, grabbing photos whenever he came home, starting the whole news cycle all over again.
Women literally threw themselves at him, and I was just little ol’ me, hoping he wouldn’t forget about me if I wasn’t smack dab in front of his face.
Truth be told, I was pretty sure we were exclusive, but that doubt still lingered, because Carter was either totally on the same page as me and I’d look stupid for asking. Or he totally wasn’t , and I’d look even more stupid. Because officially—we weren’t anything official.
I groaned at the utter nonsense of it all, but I didn’t want to seem too needy. Didn’t want to scare him away by asking for too much too soon. Not when I finally had his attention after all these years. And I really, really, really wanted to play it cool.
The only problem, I knew I’d be gutted if he couldn’t give me what I needed from him. Real vulnerability, and a little commitment would definitely be nice too.
I wasn’t stupid, the jokes, the teasing, the humor. It was all a carefully crafted facade to hide behind. His defense mechanisms were intentional. He wanted to keep everyone at arm’s length.
My heart thundered as I refused to admit to myself what I already knew. I was falling for him. Hard and fast, and the realization that he could easily break my heart was sobering.
I’d barely made it through the last year in one piece, and if I lost Carter, I didn’t know if I had the strength to put myself back together again .
When we rolled onto the tarmac, I sucked in a small breath, staring at the private jet sitting in front of us.
The Rookie was painted across the side of the plane in bubble gum pink letters and painted on the tail of the plane was a goddamn unicorn.
I couldn’t help but grin, and even from behind his sunglasses, I could practically smell Vaughn’s eye roll as he opened my door. I ignored him altogether until I realized he was heading towards the plane with me.
And Vaughn was definitely not part of my dirty little fantasy of how this weekend would go—Carmen’s maybe, but not mine.
“Not to be rude, but you weren’t exactly invited on this trip.” I walked in front of him, blocking his path, trying to feel out if he was going to board the plane with me.
“You don’t want me here?” Vaughn asked with a surprising amount of emotion as he hefted up my heavy bags.
I opened my mouth and tried to find a polite way of saying hell-to-the-fucking no way but he shirked back before I could form an answer, looking very offended, “You know, I can see when I’m not wanted. ”
My mouth parted in surprise as he headed back to the car… with my bags? I hadn’t expected that to be so easy. In fact, now I almost felt? —
He smirked as he looped around the car, faking me out, before heading for the plane again.
“Ha ha, very funny.” My shoulders slumped, wondering what Carter was going to think of our plus one.
“Thank you.” Vaughn said dry as ever, “I do comedy on the weekends.”
“Careful, some might consider that an invitation.” I threatened. “Watch out, I might crash your party next time.”
“Oh, I’d love to see you try, Devereux.” He muttered, adding my luggage to the cargo area while I climbed the steps onto the plane.
When I ducked inside, I bit my lip with a grin—the aisle, the plush seats, everything was littered with rose petals. It was outrageous and romantic as hell.
My heart fluttered as I spotted a note in Carter’s handwriting, and I sank into the plush, oversized seat to read it, discovering that the Rookie was a gift.
For me. So I could come see Carter whenever I wanted to.
A lump formed in my throat as I let it sink in that Carter had bought me a freaking plane.
That had to mean something serious… right?
Even for someone as filthy rich as him. Plus, he never spent money, but he’d bought me a freaking plane! I was giddy.
I was even more giddy when Vaughn stuck his head through the plane door and told me to have a safe trip before the door slammed shut. He wasn’t coming after all.
Score.
As the plane took off, I settled into my seat and pulled out a fresh magazine, immediately skipping the article about Liam—reading about my friends and family in print usually made me nauseous.
Best to avoid it altogether, because most of it was usually staged, completely made up, or photoshopped.
My stomach rolled, hoping they were saying good things about Liam and his restaurant, but I didn’t have the stomach to look for sure.
I was busy reading an enthralling article about the best waterproof mascara when a deep, smooth voice crackled through the intercom, wrapping around me like a caress.
“Good afternoon, this is your captain speaking.” My head whipped around so fast, I practically morphed into an owl.
“We’re currently cruising at an altitude of thirty-thousand-feet, and an airspeed of four-hundred-knots.
” I rolled my lips over my teeth, realizing Carter was my pilot, and hearing Carter talk shop was hot as hell.
“With clear skies as far as the eye can see, the only turbulence you can expect this afternoon will be right here inside the plane .” I grinned, shaking my head.
“I’d now like to invite Miss Devereux up to my cock , excuse me—up to the cockpit.
I repeat, the captain requires your immediate attention in the cockpit, Miss Devereux.
Please proceed to the front of the plane at your earliest convenience.
Thank you for your cooperation, and thank you for choosing Mile High Airlines. ”
I hurried up the aisle and found the door to the cockpit already cracked. “Hi, sweetheart.” Carter whispered, eyes so filled with longing it stole my breath.
“You’re here.” I breathed, eating up the cute little hat, the headset, how sexy he generally looked, flying the plane.
“Couldn’t wait.” He admitted, patting his lap, which I immediately slid on to.
“You bought me a plane.” I murmured with a devious smirk as he reached around me, flipping switches. “That’s a tough move, you know.”
His chest shook with amusement, but his words were soft as he finally gripped my waist and met my gaze again. “Oh? And why’s that?”
“Because it’s going to be hard to top a gift like that.” I said tartly, sliding my arms around his neck, becoming enveloped in his smell—fresh, clean, and intoxicating as fuck. I smiled to myself, realizing if the sky had a scent, that’s what it would be .
“Don’t you worry your pretty little head about that.” His grip on me tightened as he pulled me to his lips. “I have all kinds of plans for you, Miss Devereux.”
I smiled against his mouth. Plans were an excellent step in the right direction.