LULU
I looked across the room at the man I had once loved so much, but all that was left there now was a deep-seated hate I had yet to find a way to rein in. He stood tall, the arrogance radiating off of him in waves. If this had been months ago, I might have even stood here staring at his strength... his power... but now, all I wanted him to do was go, and to never come back. My mind said one thing, but my heart thought something else altogether different. That traitorous organ was intent on punishing me, and for what I couldn’t even be certain.
“Will you go and see what’s taking them so long, Lu?”
My eyes narrowed and my lips pursed together. It was one thing to be called Lulu like most often did, but Cade knew how much I hated to be called Lu. I knew he was doing it on purpose because he got some sick pleasure from upsetting me. And I knew why. Other Titans were able to have their cake and eat it too, but not him. I had thrown the entire thing away, box and all, and dared to fight back. Granted, most of it was via my lawyer, but the sentiment still remained.
“They will be down in a few minutes,” I told him, refusing to move from where I stood.
“If you had them ready, we would already be gone. Now, we’re going to get stuck in traffic.”
I simply shrugged. My job was to let them go with him, but nowhere did it state I had to make it easy on him. Our children were all busy with various activities, all of which he knew about, but he was conveniently trying to pretend otherwise. I could go upstairs and help them with their things, but I wouldn’t. I did turn away from him, however, and walked over to the large window that overlooked the city.
I loved this particular unit. Cade and I had lived at other addresses in this affluent neighborhood, but none of them had the same view which had captivated me from the moment we walked into the unfinished unit. I could still remember the day which was one a lot like this. It was also late Spring, and the children were in school. I had met my husband here when he was on his lunch break, and meeting him at one place or another was very common. I had arrived at the penthouse and when I walked in, I noticed that we were alone.
“Where’s Jane?” I’d asked him. Usually, our realtor would accompany us to these showings.
“She’s back at her office. Never mind about her, though. What do you think about this place?”
I did as he asked, and focused on the sight in front of me. It had been a lot to take in. Beneath the feet of my Louboutin heels lay subfloor, and the walls had recently been put up, but not painted. I took a few more steps inside the place, and the magnificence of the kitchen came into view. The cabinets were the perfect shade of black, highlighting the Carrera marble countertops and backsplash. The appliances were not yet in, but I had an idea of where they would go. It was wide open to the great room which was an entertainer’s dream.
I often arranged get-togethers at our place, whether it was poker night for Cade or just a Thursday girls’ night in with friends. At that time, I seemed to have plenty of them, but a lot changed over the years since then. Not wanting to dwell on that, I stayed in the moment and forced myself to remember how excited I had been that day.
“This is our place,” he’d told me when he’d come up behind me, drawing me into his arms.
“Are you sure this is the penthouse you want?”
“It is, and you’ll see why soon. Go look at the other rooms.”
I had broken away from him and did as he’d asked. When I’d reached the bedroom, the same city skyline came into view. We could lay in bed and see the sparkling lights of the nearby skyscrapers, and even hints of Lake Michigan as it peeked out between the tall buildings. It was one of the most gorgeous views I had ever seen in my life. Cade came back up behind me, then pointed at the fireplace mantle.
When I had walked over to it, I noticed a set of keys and I picked them up before turning to him. “We might want to pick these up and get them to Jane. We ? —”
“We don’t need Jane any longer,” he’d said, and I arched my brow in question.
“What are you saying?”
Cade had leaned down and kissed along my bare shoulder causing me to shiver. “I already bought the place. We close on it in two months.”
“You what?” I had thought the house decision would be mutual, and something akin to anger filled my veins. I spun around and opened my mouth. “How could ? —”
Cade didn’t give me a chance to lay into him because he’d drawn me into his arms, then fused his mouth to mine. He ended up fucking me against those newly put in walls, and I’d loved every second of it. I had loved him. Completely. That was always an afternoon I remembered, especially when I would stare out at the view. It used to fill me with warmth, but knowing who the man behind me was, it now chilled me to the bone.
“If you’re not going to get them, then I will.”
I watched as he stormed to the staircase, then quickly ascended the steps. “Asshole,” I mumbled under my breath.
Normally, I would’ve been glad he hadn’t heard me, but I no longer cared. After all, this unit hadn’t been the only one he purchased, or the only one he used. When I had gotten the report back from the private investigator, it seemed as if he had been keeping a much younger woman in a smaller unit a few floors down. I could only imagine how he presented the place to her, and even thinking about him fucking her against the wall like he had done me made me want to vomit. Everything I had seen in the file that he’d uncovered made me hate Cade more and more.
“ You should’ve been happy that I kept it secret for so long,” Cade had the audacity to tell me the day I told him that I knew everything.
“What?” I’d asked, the gall of this man sending my anger to its near boiling point.
“At least I didn’t do what others had done and flaunted my infidelities in the open. I spared you the hushed whispering and pitiful stares from others. I saved you the scandal of it all and this is the thanks I get.”
“Get out,” I’d said then, so when he came back downstairs cursing about our children once more, I stared at him and repeated those same words. “Get out!”
“I’m not leaving without our kids,” he told me, and I knew he wouldn’t. Right now, playing the role of the doting father only served to improve his image.
“Just go into the hallway. I will help them finish getting their things.”
“It’s about time you fucking did something other than run to your damn lawyer. I bet you spread your long fucking legs open for him while wishing it was?—”
A sound at the top of the staircase silenced him mid rant, and I looked up in horror at our oldest. She quickly descended, and the look she gave me made Cade smirk. The children had taken our separation the hardest, and knowing he was feeding them lies about why it happened only infuriated me more. Zachary and Leslie joined their sister, and they hugged and kissed me goodbye. Cade was the last one to leave, and looking over his shoulder, he regarded me with disinterest.
“I do hope you take some time for yourself this weekend. You look like fucking hell. It’s no wonder I needed younger women. You haven’t aged well at all.”
With that, he disappeared through the door and the loud closing of it made me jump. I flipped off the door, then walked into the great room. There was a large mirror above the fireplace, and stopping, I stared at my reflection. I no longer recognized the woman staring back at me at all. I did look a lot older, most of the visible signs of aging coming in the last few weeks to months. I had once taken such good care of myself until then. When not planning parties and events, or attending one of the kid’s activities, I would be at the spa. Since his betrayal, there had been little reason for me to expel so much energy into my appearance.
What’s the use? I have no one to look good for anymore.
I told myself that more than once. I should have kept them up simply for pride’s sake, but it was counterproductive because my incessant worrying would cause the frown lines to reappear, and with a vengeance.
I stood there for several minutes, before going to the built-in wine fridge. I grabbed a bottle of expensive merlot, and opted to not even grab a glass. Once in the great room, I flopped down on the sofa, then opened the bottle. After taking a large swig of it, I grabbed the remote. With the television on, I could do what I did most nights which was stare aimlessly at the screen until my eyes grew heavy.
The relief I usually hoped to find was evading me tonight, and the longer I sat there drinking, the more upset I had become. I couldn’t get the expression on Amanda’s face out of my head. She had been taking this divorce harder than her siblings, and I hadn’t realized to what extent until now. Mandy was going to blame me. In fact, I think she already did, and her father’s callous words didn’t help, which was likely the reason he did it. I wouldn’t even be surprised if he wasn’t purposely trying to sway them to his side. During a lot of child custody disputes, the judge would often take their children’s wants into consideration when making a ruling.
If they all wanted to stay with him, it would hurt any argument I presented. His infidelity and everything else would be overlooked, and I would become the one on trial. He was a Titan, and as such, his lawyers could present one hell of a case. If I lost my children, even for a few days, I would have no one, or anything, in this godforsaken city. Cade might have taken my idyllic life, my pride, and sense of worth, but I would be damned if he took my children from me, too.
He will, though. I had to remind myself of that because it was the truth. I had taken something from him, and now he would take the only people that mattered from me in retaliation.
Image was everything to a Titan. They were certainly not held to higher standards like the rest of us, but they were constantly in the spotlight. Their entire lives could be front page material at any given time, and the scandal associated with his cheating would make headlines for sure. By throwing him out instead of accepting it all, he now had to worry about how it would tarnish his name and reputation once everything was revealed. So far, we had managed to keep it out of the public eye, but it was only for so long.
“And tonight’s attendees are none other than Titans, Daxon Faulkner and Cade Davis. The two?—”
I looked up at the television, and it took me a minute to realize how late it had gotten. While lost in my thoughts and nursing a bottle of wine, time hadn’t stopped as I wished that it would. Every second that passed was one less I had in this life... this world... It would all come crashing down on me sooner or later.
As I looked at the screen, it looked like any other business function until a redhead caught my attention. She was one of the women discovered by the private investigator, and watching my ex talk to her, only reminded me of the day I had seen the evidence with my own eyes. Those photographs had been like sticking a knife into my chest, and seeing them together was like twisting it deeper. I grabbed the bottle, took another swig, then turned the television off. I had seen enough for one night. Although I eliminated the visual evidence, clearing it from my head would prove to be a more difficult task.