Chapter Seven #3
As the evening progressed, Darcy looked on as his cousin maneuvered Miss Elizabeth to the instrument and drew a chair near to enjoy her company.
His heart ached with his cousin’s treachery.
Darcy wanted desperately to replace Edward, to be the one to whom she directed her attention.
Lady Catherine attempted to engage him in trivialities, but his mind rested with Elizabeth.
At length, he rose from the settee and walked deliberately towards the pianoforte.
Commanded by his heart, he stood where he could have a full view of Elizabeth’s countenance.
With pleasure, he noted her eyebrow rose in surprise.
When the music allowed, she turned to him with her usual provocative smile and said, “You mean to frighten me, Mr. Darcy, by coming in all this state to hear me. But I will not be alarmed, though your sister does play so well. There is a stubbornness about me that never can bear to be frightened at the will of others. My courage rises with every attempt to intimidate me.”
Ah, he thought. He had so missed this playfulness.
The connection between them was still there.
She teased him deliberately. He casually leaned against the instrument.
“Although I would never criticize a lady’s judgment, you cannot believe me to entertain any design of alarming you.
I have had the pleasure of your acquaintance long enough to know you take great enjoyment in professing opinions which, in fact, are not your own. ”
Darcy enjoyed the twist of her mouth in a suppressed smile.
He had sketched a mischievous portrait of her nature, and Elizabeth was content with laughing at herself.
Darcy would gladly abandon his reserve for her lightness; he would gladly abandon his life for her love.
Eventually, she turned to Colonel Fitzwilliam, but she still possessed Darcy.
“Your cousin will give you a pretty notion of me and teach you not to believe a word I say. I am particularly unlucky in meeting with a person so well able to expose my real character, in a part of the world where I had hoped to pass myself off with some degree of credit. Indeed, Mr. Darcy, it is very ungenerous of you to mention all that you knew to my disadvantage in Hertfordshire—and give me leave to say, very impolitic, too—for it is provoking me to retaliate, and such things may come out as will shock your relations to hear.”
Darcy relished this moment. He had missed her so much. She possessed impertinence, but Elizabeth never excited angry annoyance in him. “Miss Elizabeth, you may speak as you see fit. I am not afraid of you,” he said, smiling.
The colonel, who evidently enjoyed the way Elizabeth affected Darcy, encouraged her. “Pray let me hear what you have to accuse him of. I should like to know how my cousin behaves among strangers.”
“You shall hear then—but prepare yourself for something very dreadful. The first time of my ever seeing him in Hertfordshire, you must know, was at a ball; and at this ball, what do you think he did? He danced only four dances! I am sorry to tell you, but so it was. He danced only four dances, though gentlemen were scarce, and, to my certain knowledge, more than one young lady was sitting down in want of a partner. Mr. Darcy, you cannot deny the fact.” Her chin rose with her customary defiance.
So, Elizabeth still desired an apology for his actions at the assembly hall. He could oblige her; it was long overdue. Darcy had planned an apology since her time at Netherfield. “I had not at that time the honor of knowing any lady in the assembly beyond my own party.”
“True, and nobody can ever be introduced in a ballroom,” Elizabeth retorted. Mayhap in retrospect, the reason lacked soundness. Bingley had offered Darcy an introduction, which Darcy had refused. He owed her more of an explanation.
“Perhaps,” said Darcy, “I should have judged better had I sought an introduction, but I am ill-qualified to recommend myself to strangers.” There. That should allay her objections and express to Elizabeth his sorrow for his impolitic behavior.
As before, Elizabeth spoke to his cousin again. “Shall we ask him why a man of sense and education, and who has lived in the world, is ill-qualified to recommend himself to strangers?”
“I can answer your question without applying to him,” Edward offered Darcy a sly look.
“It is because he will not give himself the trouble.” Darcy could not believe the colonel would say such provocative lies.
Edward knew Darcy to be a gentleman. The colonel, evidently, wished to discredit Darcy in Elizabeth’s eyes.
Yet, those eyes still belonged to Darcy.
They had not broken contact since this repartee began.
He offered, “I certainly have not the talent which some people possess of conversing easily with those I have never seen before. I cannot catch their tone of conversation or appear interested in their concerns, as I often see others do.”
That should permit Elizabeth an opportunity to view his cousin for the flatterer he is.
Her eyebrow arched again, and Elizabeth’s amusement flitted across her features.
With a smirk, she said, “My fingers do not move over this instrument in the masterly manner which I see so many women do. But then I have always supposed it to be my own fault because I would not take the trouble of practicing.”
Darcy rationalized neither of them required anyone else’s approval and offered a compliment. “You are perfectly correct. You have employed your time much better. No one admitted to the privilege of hearing you could think anything wanting. We neither of us perform to strangers.”
Lady Catherine interrupted by coming to the instrument and once again criticizing Elizabeth’s musical ability.
His aunt evidently did not appreciate his attention to Elizabeth and intended to “remind” him of his duty to Anne by touting his cousin’s presumed musical talent.
Ashamed of his aunt’s behavior, Darcy assumed a haughty countenance.
Elizabeth received Lady Catherine’s remarks with all the forbearance of civility and unknowingly received Darcy’s renewed regard.
The colonel and Darcy took turns requesting her continued presence at the instrument until his aunt’s carriage returned the Collinses’ party to the Parsonage.
In his chambers, Darcy lay beneath the counterpane, stretching his limbs to relieve the tension the evening’s entertainment had brought.
He had spent the last few months declaring his freedom from Elizabeth Bennet, but the evening had persuaded him otherwise.
Since the lady had entered his life, Darcy had spent numerous hours debating whether he could legitimately succumb to her charms. He knew without question he was forever lost to her.
Elizabeth Bennet would be the mark by which he would judge all other women.
Yet, he still could not justify his personal pursuit of her.
However, Darcy knew without a question that he could not give her up.
If he could not rid himself of his obsession, the only choice was to win Elizabeth’s regard and to limit his association with her family.
How might he best soften Elizabeth’s liabilities?
He thought he could tolerate the company of Miss Bennet and probably her father.
Would regularly seeing those two be enough for Elizabeth?
Pemberley was a good distance from Hertfordshire, and it would not be easy for Elizabeth’s family to visit.
He could arrange business in Town when Mrs. Bennet and the younger sisters descended upon his estate.
He must also be diligent in overseeing those connections having too much influence on Georgiana.
It would not be ideal, but the Bennets could be brought to Pemberley when others were not expected.
It could be achieved, and the trouble involved would be worthwhile if Darcy could earn Elizabeth’s love.
A few moments of intolerable disdain would pale indeed to all the pleasures of her company.
The gift of Miss Elizabeth’s love and devotion had been a prayer he had recited more than once over these last few months.
“The prayer the Devil answers,” he chuckled aloud as the darkness enveloped him.
With a renewed resolve, he fell asleep. Images of Elizabeth at the pianoforte frequented his dreams, and her smile was all for his pleasure.
Dawn came early for Darcy. He had made a decision during those long waking hours.
Pushing away the bed linens, he swung his legs over the side of the bed and reached for the bell cord to summon his man.
Today, he would seek out Elizabeth’s company.
Today, he would endeavor to win her heart.
He knew Elizabeth to be at least aware of his interest, although she probably was uncertain of its depth.
Today, he would prove to Elizabeth, despite his concerns with her family, he was very much intent on winning her regard.