52
Flare
He wasn’t coming, but he also wasn’t staying. My villain prince was going back to Winter as planned.
Only much sooner. And without any intention of coming back.
We wouldn’t get to say a peaceful goodbye. We wouldn’t have another day here.
I jumped on him, except not with open arms. I pounded my fists into his chest while shouting, “No” and “No” and “No!”
I wanted to knock him down and drag him onto the tidefarer, take him prisoner like he once took me. Weeping and raging, I put my whole body into it. Punching Jeryn felt like punching a cliff, but I didn’t care, and yet I never cared more. Worse, he didn’t fight back, which made me angrier.
“No!” I cried. “No, not like this! It’s not supposed to happen like this!”
Every muscle in his face twisted, a thousand terrible emotions threatening to smash through. He clasped my waist, holding me as I attacked him. “It must,” he said. “You have to leave me here.”
My face crumbled. I sagged, my mouth landing against his neck, with his vial pendant wedged between us. “I won’t.”
“You will.”
“I won’t!”
“Flare.” Jeryn pried himself away and grabbed my shoulders. “Listen to me.”
“We’ll keep hiding until they’re gone.”
“So long as there’s a chance either of us are here, they’ll tear through this realm.”
That killed whatever else I’d been about to yell. We had vowed to stay together no matter the time or distance, no matter if I sailed these seas and he sat on his throne. My prince and I had sworn to bridge that forbidden chasm. All this time, we’d been thinking and plotting and preparing. And if the Seasons ripped us apart like this, we wouldn’t have the chance to enact those plans.
But if he left with me now, only for us to separate calmly later, there would be no one here to distract the troops. Finding him and apprehending me was their goal. If Jeryn remained, he would satisfy one agenda and stifle the other. This would also provide a more believable return for him, and it would give him an opportunity to protect the rainforest from further conquest.
My eyes burned. I saw every cut and scar on his face, including the ones that had disappeared. I saw tenderness and sacrifice reflected in his eyes. I should have expected this, should have known what he’d choose and why.
Anguish cracked me in half. “Jeryn,” I begged. “Please.”
Please don’t do this. Please don’t let me go. Please don’t break my heart.
His forehead fell against mine. “You will do as I say and get in that fucking boat. You’ll be careful, and you’ll disappear so that Summer won’t find you.” His voice lowered to a tormented whisper. “So that I won’t find you.”
So he wouldn’t find me. Lest Jeryn should grow desperate and commit himself to another cat and mouse chase, I had to make sure he would lose.
“Do not let yourself get caught again,” he hissed. “This is my command.”
“Bullshit,” I gritted through my tears. “You don’t rule me.”
“And I never have.” His eyes flashed. “Yet it was worth a try.”
“We can escape together. We can find a way. We just need a moment.”
Jeryn’s chest collapsed as if my pleas had crashed there like bricks. “Flare.”
Shackle him, my heart wailed.
Release him, my head implored.
Wildly, I shook my head. But seconds later, the resistance deflated as his thumb traced my wet cheek. “I would tear this continent in half to get to you. I would surrender my crown. I would live and die anywhere, to stay by your side. But from Winter, I will bleed myself dry protecting you. I’ll tighten Rhys’s leash, divert my court, stop anyone from searching.”
I choked out, “But you’re my home.”
The truth struck my chest like a javelin. We’d built a home here, but more than the rainforest, this man was my home. My sanctuary and my refuge and my safe haven. And from the way he shuddered, I had become his home too.
A furious sob broke from my lips. “Hellfire, Jeryn. Don’t ask this of me.”
“Royals don’t ask.” He took my hand and pressed it to his chest. “And my little beast does not wither.”
No. I didn’t. Not unless I let these monsters win.
They had taken my parents and my freedom. Now they sought to take my prince.
But if this world dared to come between us, we would fight back. Even if it meant facing that battle from opposite sides of this world.
The mystical elements of this realm wouldn’t deter Summer from swarming it. Nature was formidable in every Season, so the legend wouldn’t intimidate King Rhys. Instead, he’d be salivating to get his greedy hands on this place, if only to destroy the ruins and any proof that an equal society had lived here.
If the ancient palace wanted to be found, it would be. Just like this realm had been discovered. Or if it wished to remain hidden, it would make sure of that too.
But that didn’t mean we should step aside and do nothing.
I spoke quickly. “If they didn’t see us, and if they think the attack was only from the fauna, and if they don’t find the ruins …” Fire raced across my tongue. “Convince them this realm is riddled with plague. Make them fear this rainforest.”
Those observant eyes sharpened. “Viruses.”
Yes. Like the one that claimed the ancients. In the eyes of The Dark Seasons, only a scientist would know how to survive that. Even better, only the most advanced scientist, from the most advanced nation. Jeryn could paint a horrific picture of sickness. If there was one thing Summer feared besides the wrath of Winter, it was contagion.
With a firsthand account from the Prince of Winter, no one would brave coming here. Certainly not His Majesty. That would keep the ruins protected from Rhys.
Jeryn agreed. Yet a hundred logistics, a hundred obstacles, and a hundred contingency plans sat on his face. “This will delay us. To meet here in the future, we would need to be sure, to have a guarantee that returning undetected is safe, which shall take time.” His throat contorted. “A long time.”
My heart sank like a pebble to the bottom of the sea. Jeryn had described often enough the life of a Royal, in which he’d have twelve times as many people watching him after this. Upon his return, the court would be focused on every move he made, and his security detail would increase tenfold. For all his tactical genius, this man would be guarded like a priceless object, to the point where he’d have no means to avoid detection.
We had expected to send one another secret messages. But with him guarded more intently, a reunion or any contact would have to wait for longer than either of us could predict.
Jeryn caressed the side of my face. “Until then, you have your key now.”
My true voice. The way I spoke through my art. Only hours ago, I’d figured out just how much of myself I had to offer this world. That my voice, my destiny, and my strengths didn’t come from the rainforest. They came from me.
This prince had reminded me that I had a choice in my fate.
“Tell me I will see you again,” I choked out.
His voice turned as solid as iron. “I will come to you. I will always come.”
A sob dropped from my mouth. He would come. But not soon. Not even close. That part, he didn’t say.
All the same, he snatched my cheeks. “Know this. I would chase you to the ends of the ocean, to the bottom of the fucking sea. I would mutilate anyone who stopped me.” His fingers knifed into my hair. “So help me, I would freeze this world for you.”
“And so help me, I wouldn’t want you to do that. If you’re going to act for my sake, then heal this world instead.”
“Selfless little beast,” he murmured. “So be it.”
“Good.” Folding my hands over his, I gave him the dirtiest look I could muster. “Because I will hunt you down if you don’t.”
“That isn’t a threat,” he countered. “It’s a temptation.”
Tears puddled in my eyes. This morning after fucking the day away, and he’d said we still had time.
Suddenly, one year felt like one second. It had gone by too fast. We wouldn’t find out how it felt to have more time. We would lose those dusks and dawns. We would forsake every sunset and sunrise. We could sacrifice every lost kiss and touch. We would surrender the life we’d barely gotten to taste.
Poet and Briar had earned their happy ending. They were blessed, and I couldn’t be more elated for them. Yet I envied their bond. When the prince and I next saw one another, it could be months or years. From then on, our reunions would be sporadic and risky. They would always be fleeting.
What we shared would remain unknown, never existing for the world to see. Our language was fire and ice, it was ferocious and enduring—a language of survival. It was a rainforest, something that remained elusive and isolated.
Like our shared ability to hear my voice. Like Aire’s sensory powers. Like Aspen’s beautiful markings. Like Poet and Briar’s unbreakable union.
If magic existed in nature, it must exist in humans and fauna too. If nothing else, Jeryn and I would always share this private link.
Let this go, my blood said.
Hold on tight, my heart said.
I surprised Jeryn—the last surprise—and slipped off his necklace. Crouching to the ground, I packed the vial with sand, sealed the vessel, and rose to loop the strap back over his head.
“To heal you when you need it,” I said, the words splintering on my tongue.
He clasped the pendant, his features constricting. “I have nothing to trade.”
“Yes, you do.” I framed the hard ridge of his jaw. “You’ve already given it to me.”
His name, his kiss, his body. He’d given me his thoughts, his fears, his doubts, his regrets, his shame, his desires. In those ways, this cold prince had given me his heart.
Jeryn’s gaze clung to mine. Those irises grew tender in a way I’d once thought impossible. He soaked in the view as though he were staring into the sun.
The muscles in his face cinched, and heat swirled in his pupils. “I belong to you.” Seizing the back of my head, my villain prince swooped down and hissed against my mouth, “Everywhere you are, I shall be yours.”
His mouth grabbed my own, ripping open my lips and pulling a grieving noise from me. I flung my arms around him and sobbed into the kiss. My mouth latched on, catching the desperate flex of his tongue, angling my head and fitting my own tongue to his.
Groaning, Jeryn locked my scalp in place with one hand and gripped my ass with the other. His strong arms banded me to him, enabling his mouth to reach deeper, to locate the depths of my soul.
I kissed him because I wanted him. I kissed him because I needed him.
I kissed him because I loved him.
I loved this villain prince more than any legend or wish I’d ever had. I told him with my moan, the clench of my lips, the way my tongue roped around his. I let him feel it in the quiver of my mouth, the nip of my teeth.
I kissed him for the year we’d shared. I kissed him for someday.
Jeryn’s body hitched. His ferocious mouth crushed mine harder, hotter. He hoisted me into him, my tears leaking into the place where our lips fused and rocked.
Just one more time. Just one more minute.
Would I remember the shape of this kiss? Would I remember the last gasp of it?
Yes and yes. I felt in us science and spirit, caution and curiosity, sanity and wildness. There was sense and madness everywhere, like love and hate. We’d been lucky to explore both. Whatever came next, our story had happened. And maybe what we’d had here, and who we became together, was the greatest sort of revolution. If we were possible, maybe other things were possible. Like the jester and princess, stories such as ours could move kingdoms.
With an agonized groan, Jeryn thrust his lips from mine. Now , he mouthed through his teeth. Leave now.
Yes. Now. If I didn’t, I’d break my promise and make him break his. I’d split and scatter into a million glittering flecks.
With a pained cry, I whispered against his mouth, “I love you.”
Then I turned and ran. Saltwater scorched my eyes, yet somehow I kept moving.
Poet and Briar waited by the tidefarer, empathy consuming their features. They understood this pain all too well.
As I reached them, the jester quietly extended his hand, and I took it. I knew what would happen next. Once the sun had set, we would dock at the wharf where I’d originally escaped. Under the cloak of night, we would say goodbye from there, with Poet and Briar returning to their ship alongside Aire.
The tidefarer would be mine. I didn’t know where I would go first. But as a sand drifter, I’d let the waves show me the way, because there were so many places, so much of Summer to see. And so much of my voice to offer.
Poet shoved the tidefarer from the shore and leaped inside. I hunched over the rim and snatched up a fistful of gold, then rose to my feet. The vessel sliced through the sea, and the clearest jeweled blue rippled under us.
The trees swayed. From the bushes, my fauna pack crept into view, having followed my scent. Relief washed through me because they’d survived and come to bid me farewell. I bowed my head in gratitude, and my trembling lips blew the animals a kiss, swearing to return someday.
Ahead of them, a shadow loomed on the cove. I warned myself not to look, but I did. My villain prince stood there. He watched me, and I watched him, and the smaller he got, the more my heart grew.
No longer did I see his face, but his shape remained. And I loved that shape. I loved it so much.
I grinned through my tears. Spreading my fingers, I let the wind take the sand, sprinkling it over the water and setting it free. Then I turned to face the sun.