18. Gemma
Chapter Eighteen
GEMMA
My hands were practically shaking, not from nervousness, but rather from the vibration of anticipation spinning through my veins. Diego’s comment, whenever you’re ready, echoed in my thoughts. I hadn’t been attuned to how intensely ready I was before this evening.
For the first time, ever, my mind wasn’t getting in the way. When it came to dating and men and anything touchy, my mind was an absolute master at throwing up roadblocks, anything for me to trip and stumble. Nothing disastrous. And yet, always enough to take me away from sensation and to keep me thinking about out of place matters that had nothing to do with the moment.
Dwelling in the moment, particularly when the moment involved intimacy, had started to feel like something I would never experience. Aside from the obvious benefits to my body after my injury, yoga had offered me a space to learn to sink into physical sensation. That was a gift. Yet, I’d all but given up the idea that I could lose myself in sensation when desire was part of that equation.
Desire was an unfamiliar experience for me. I’d dated here and there in college, and I was no prude. Yet, it was a crushing letdown whenever I followed things through to the conclusion.
Now, with my piercingly clear recollection of my encounter with Diego on the kitchen counter, I thought perhaps I might finally see through to the other side of all of those letdowns.
Learning Diego had his own cynicism about relationships was actually a blessing for me. Because I wasn’t ready to try to deal with tangled emotions. If this could just be pleasure and nothing more, without worrying about all the rest, that might be a heaven I hadn’t imagined before.
The door clicked shut behind Diego at my house, and he stood there with one hand hooked in his pocket and the other pressed flat against the door behind him. He’d followed me home in his truck. He wore the same black leather jacket he’d worn when I saw him on his motorcycle. Apparently, I had a thing for leather jackets.
All I was doing was standing there, and I could feel a prickle chasing over my skin, the sensation of individual goosebumps ticklish all over. The air felt heavy, laden with an electric charge. We stared at each other, and it almost felt as if we were connected by an invisible wire, one that vibrated to the frequency of the heartbeat of desire between us.
The silence was broken by the distant sound of a horse neighing. Diego’s brows hitched up. “Do they always greet you?”
I smiled. “Usually. I need to give them their evening hay.”
“I’ll help,” he replied, pushing away from the door and opening it again.
I dropped my purse on the table in the entryway and walked past him as he held the door open for me. I felt his presence beside me every step of the way. Our footsteps crunched in the gravel. I was wearing a skirt with a blouse and cowboy boots. Normally, I would change before dealing with the horses, but it was late.
We stepped through the barn entrance, and all four horses poked their heads over the stall doors, looking in our direction. Charlie nickered softly as we passed him by. Diego greeted each of the horses with a murmured hello and a quick stroke, which only served to deepen my desire with the tiny wrinkle that my heart flipped over at his easy kindness to the horses.
He helped me toss the hay in their stalls. Afterward, I returned to the storage room to make sure the grain bins were completely closed. One morning recently, I came in to a mess left behind by a pair of squirrels. After a quick check, I discovered I’d left the lid on one of the grain bins loose.
Turning back, I looked over to Diego where he waited by the door. He had one arm above his head, his hand curled in a relaxed grip on the door frame. The position lifted his T-shirt slightly, and my eyes snagged on the strip of bronze skin between his shirt hem and his jeans. My mouth actually watered. Because I wanted to drag my tongue over that skin and taste him.
Although it was early summer, it was evening, and the nights were cool here in Alaska. The air felt suddenly warm as heat chased over my skin.
Speaking of air, I couldn’t get much in my lungs when I tried to take a breath. So much for all those yoga classes. Maybe two feet separated us, and I didn’t know how to close the distance even though I desperately wanted to be closer to him.
Because Diego seemed particularly suited to knowing exactly what I needed and when I needed it, his hand dropped from the door frame and tagged mine. He reeled me close in a smooth motion. In a blinding fast second, he spun us around. My shoulder blades bumped against the wall, and his mouth was inches from mine.
I could feel every thundering beat of my heart. As every cell in my body vibrated with the frequency of my need and the molten hot look in his eyes. I gulped in air with a rapid, shallow breath.
“Tell me, sugar, should I wait to kiss you?”
I shook my head immediately. Because I could not wait another second.
Diego made a low sound in his throat right before his lips dusted across mine. It was a glancing touch, a tease, and maybe a test. A little whimper escaped. His lips brushed across mine again, and electricity sizzled like fiery filaments through my body. Impatient, I arched into him, sliding a hand around to curl at the back of his neck. He took our kiss from a brush of contact into a full-blown plundering of my mouth.
Diego kissed commandingly, one palm coming up to cup my cheek as his thumb traced along the edge of my jaw. He angled my head to the side and deepened our kiss. His tongue swept in deep strokes, and I couldn’t get enough of the taste and feel of him.
By the time we broke free to gulp in much needed air, my body was on fire. My nerves were alight, and my mind was hazy with a near frantic need. Need for more—more of Diego, more of the riot of sensation only he seemed able to set loose inside of me.
We stared at each other in the shadowy room with nothing but the soft glow of a shaft of light falling through the open doorway. His face was in the shadow, illuminating its strong lines.
I was impatient, my hips rocking restlessly into him. We fit together so well, his arousal was nestled just above the apex of my thighs. I could feel it like a hot brand. I could also feel the slick moisture of my own arousal, and hear my blood rushing through my ears with every beat of my heart.
Diego’s eyes searched mine. “Gemma, I’m about to fuck you against the wall. I was thinking maybe the first time should be a little more comfortable.”
I shook my head. Because the truth was, the prospect of being so overcome with lust that someone would want to fuck me against the wall was an insanely hot idea. Plus, I didn’t want my usual anxiety to take over. I might get bored and start mentally reviewing my to-do list, feeling impatient and wishing it was over.
“We’re not going anywhere,” I murmured, right before I leaned up, tugged on the lapels of his leather jacket and brought him back to my mouth.
Another mind-melding kiss later, he lifted his head. “Fuck, Gemma, you make me lose my mind.”
My body overflowed with sensation, and I shoved a palm under his shirt, letting out a gasp at the feel of his warm skin. His breath hissed through his teeth, and I saw the flash of a smile in the dim light.
“Sweetheart,” he murmured when I rocked my hips restlessly against his arousal. “This?—”
I shoved his shirt all the way up and dipped my head to string kisses over his chest. I heard a muttered curse and then I felt his hands slide under my blouse. I let out a moan at the feel of his palms on my skin, his calloused touch sending sparks scattering. Every touch from him was its own experience, each one opening a doorway into another room of new sensations.
It was a fumbled rush, but he got my blouse open and pushed my bra down, my breasts plumping over. He growled right before he dipped his head and caught one of my tight, achy nipples with his mouth. The suction had me crying out, as I pressed against the rough wooden wall behind me.
I dragged my eyes open. I needed more. I wanted him inside me. I could feel the hard press of his arousal, and I reached between us, deftly undoing his fly.
He curled his hand over mine, stilling it. “Slow down.” His tone was ragged, but soothing.
He didn’t understand how much I needed this. How much I needed the frantic quality of it. “I don’t want to slow down,” I whispered.
His eyes searched mine. We didn’t speak, but he seemed to understand what I needed. His hand moved away from mine, and I slid my palm into his boxers, curling around the velvety hot length of him. I savored the way he groaned, biting out, “Gemma, you’re killing me. You’re so fucking hot.”
In another fumbled rush, I shoved his jeans down just enough that his cock sprang free. Meanwhile, he hitched my skirt up around my hips. His palm smoothed over the inside of my thigh as he pushed a knee out to the side. That simple touch was such a seduction, sending sparks flying over my skin. My insides were liquid, and I was needy, so very needy.
Diego, being far more prepared than me, yanked his wallet out of his back pocket, producing a condom and smoothing it on, protecting us both in a matter of seconds. Then, he reached between my thighs, pushing my panties out of the way and let out a satisfied hum when he found my core hot, wet, and ready. I was so ready, more ready than I had ever been in my life.
“Oh, sugar, so good.” He drew his fingers out and obliterated my brain cells when he lifted them and licked my arousal off, watching me the whole time. “You taste as good as I thought,” he murmured, just before dipping his head and catching my lips in a lingering kiss.
He teased his cock at my entrance when his tongue glided against mine. I was on the edge of coming already, but it wasn’t enough. I wanted him inside me. My hips bucked against him, and I made a restless sound in his mouth.
He lifted his head and tugged one of my knees up to curl around his hip. “Okay, sugar, this won’t be graceful.” A gravelly chuckle followed, and I thought I might melt on the spot.
“I don’t care,” I whispered. Because I didn’t. I wanted it to be ungraceful and messy and hot, so hot that I burned in the fire of sensation.
He lifted me against him, using the wall behind us as a brace. I felt his thick crown pressing and then he reached between us to adjust the angle, right before he filled me completely.
I let out a tattered moan as my head thumped against the wall behind me. This, this , was everything. I was held in Diego’s strong embrace with his thick length filling and stretching me. Pleasure spiraled inside me, the force of it gathering with every resounding beat of my heart.
Diego’s speech was almost slurred. “God, you feel so good. Hang on, sugar.”
He held still for a moment before he began rocking into me with subtle shifts of his hips. Each stroke went a little deeper and stretched me a little more. We were pressed tightly together, and my clit was rubbing at the base of his cock with every nudge of him inside of me.
My orgasm struck suddenly, almost surprising me. Everything pulled tight like a knot of pressure in my core before all the ropes snapped free. I cried out and trembled roughly against him.
His lips pressed on my neck, open and hot on the underside of my jaw, as I felt him begin to shudder before his entire body went taut as tremors rippled through him. It was all over but for the pleasure spinning through me in echoes. He held me there against the wall in the dusty, almost dark storage room in the barn, the sound of our heaving breaths filling the space. I was awash in sensation, coasting on eddies of it as pure joy drifted through me. I had forgotten myself enough for this to actually happen.
Eventually, Diego withdrew and helped me put my clothes back into place. His gaze coasted over me. I probably looked like a giddy fool, and I didn’t even care.
“How are you doing?” he asked, his lips kicking up at the corner with a slow smile.
“Awesome. I’m doing awesome.”
“Well, that makes two of us then.”