Chapter 37
Jane came downstairs thoroughly exhausted from a sleepless night.
Although finally dozing sometime after dawn, she had overslept as well, and it was half-past nine.
This at least gave her some small degree of satisfaction, for surely the earl would have retreated to his library and papers, or left the house, by this hour.
After the cruel words they had exchanged the night before, Jane did not want to face him.
She came to an abrupt stop in the dining-room doorway when she saw him seated at the head of the long gilt table. Her heart lurched.
He didn’t look at her. Nicole was in her baby chair, on his right, playing with a spoon and croissant.
He was sipping coffee and reading the Times, apparently having overslept as well.
Had he also passed a mostly sleepless night?
Jane realized she was slightly breathless, and despite their fight she couldn’t help but remember, of all things, his hard body pressing hers and the heat and strength of his mouth.
Determined, then, and angry with herself, Jane sailed forward, toward Nicole. She cried out at the sight of her mother approaching, finally causing the earl to glance indifferently her way. Nicole waved the spoon happily, banged it once, then began to gnaw it.
“No, sweetheart,” the earl said, taking the spoon from her despite her vocal protests. “‘Tis unseemly to chew the silverware.”
Nicole began to cry.
Nick stroked her hair and placed the croissant in her chubby hand, but she ignored him, dropping it. Jane paused, waiting to be summoned to the rescue, yet feeling no satisfaction—just a wrenching in her heart at the sight of father and daughter together.
“Sweetheart, the croissant was baked today,” Nick cajoled with a smile. His voice was low and melodious, and Nicole suddenly stopped shrieking to stare at him as he smiled and bit off a third, chewing gustily. “Want to share Papa’s?” he asked.
“Papa,” Nicole cried, chubby hands flailing. Nick handed her the croissant, which she now claimed greedily. “Mama!” she shrieked triumphantly, waving the pastry at Jane.
The earl returned to his journal, apparently immersed in the news.
Jane came forward to greet her daughter with a hug and a kiss.
She sat on Nicole’s right, her gaze flitting toward her absorbed husband.
He had treated her abominably last night, not to mention humiliating her in public with his fat floozy; and now he was apparently ignoring her. She decided to ignore him as well.
Tossing the Times aside, he called to Thomas and ordered the carriage brought round, then summoned Molly, now officially Nicole’s nurse. “Have Nicole dressed for a ride in the park,” he said, standing.
He finally looked at Jane. He nodded curtly.
“You’re taking Nicole to the park?” Jane managed, flustered by both his intention and his nearness. Standing he towered over her, his legs braced, and there was no denying the strength of his thighs so obviously delineated in the snug breeches.
“I assume you have no objections?”
“Of course not,” Jane said, suddenly wistful. She imagined them all together in the open carriage on this beautiful morning, her, Nicole, the earl. She wanted to join them. She waited for an invitation—but it did not come. The earl, instead, nodded again and left.
Jane had lost her appetite, if indeed she had ever had one that day.
Molly had taken Nicole to dress her more warmly, as it was cool this morning, and she was left alone in the vast dining room.
Should she ask if she could accompany them?
Suddenly it seemed like the most marvelous idea, an outing in the park, and they could even take Chad away from his studies.
Her heart was pounding, yet she did not have the courage to move from her chair.
Ten minutes later she heard the coach leaving, and she bit her lip, foolishly feeling like crying.
What was wrong with her?
The earl might be a bastard as a man, but as a father he was superb—yet this knowledge wasn’t new.
So why should she be so distraught now, just because he’d taken his daughter for a ride in the park?
Why should she be so touched? Because it was not the thing—no other peer would dream of doing something so inelegant, so unsophisticated, as to take his tiny child for a drive.
It was touching. And she was his wife, the mother of his child, yet she wasn’t welcome to join them.
And she felt the guilt then too for having denied him his daughter in the first place.
“My lady,” Thomas intoned from the doorway, “you have a caller.”
Jane rose, brow lifted.
“It’s the Earl of Raversford,” Thomas said, a touch disapprovingly.
“Have you told him he just missed the earl?”
“Yes. It’s you he’s come to see. I showed him to the morning room.”
Jane instructed Thomas to bring tea and cakes, and hurried forward, surprised and both worried and glad that Lindley had decided to visit her.
She hadn’t seen him privately since the earl had decreed that they would be married, and not being a fool, she knew he had been told as promptly as she of the intended marriage and had thus stayed away. Yet why would he come to her now?
Lindley stood gazing out the windows at the lawns and flower beds. He turned at her footstep, and his eyes lit up at the sight of her. Jane found herself glad to see him, and she smiled eagerly. “Jon, I’m so glad you’ve come!”
He came forward and took both her hands, his regard warm and penetrating. “You are, aren’t you? How are you, Jane?”
She motioned for them to sit. “Well, I suppose,” she said, avoiding his gaze.
Lindley lifted her chin. “You look tired, as if you haven’t slept,” he said softly. He didn’t remove his fingertips from her face.
Jane blushed. She wanted to confide in him, but she would not. She could not betray her husband by sharing the problems in their life, no matter how much she needed a friend. “I had a bad dream.”
Thomas entered, looking dour as he rolled in the silver butler’s table with refreshments. Lindley dropped his hand, Jane sat up straighter. She was pink now, and wondering exactly what Thomas thought.
“Can I bring you anything else, my lady?” Thomas asked, his eyes having lost their customary blandness.
“No, that is all for now,” Jane said, feeling guilty. But for what? She hadn’t done anything except greet an old friend. The problem was, she could tell that Lindley still harbored affection for her.
It was going to come out sooner or later, the earl supposed. So it might as well be now.
They had passed many carriages and riders since entering the park, all of whom turned to stare at the Dragmore carriage with its bold black-and-gold crests.
Nick sat in the backseat of the open curricle with Nicole on a baby chair beside him, Molly on the opposite seat facing them.
Nicole played with a rattle and laughed and shrieked happily.
Those who passed them all did double takes at the sight of the baby in the Earl of Dragmore’s carriage, their curious stares turning to open gawking.
The earl ignored everyone, and when he grew tired of the seating arangements, he did not hesitate to put Nicole upon his knee.
She was thrilled with this, and quite outspoken in her pleasure.
A carriage finally, purposefully, pulled alongside them.
The earl was not surprised; to the contrary, he had expected someone to be brave enough to come up to him for the past half hour.
This gig bore the Hadderly colors, and Nick found himself facing the young countess, a newlywed, and two of her friends, a baron and another young lady.
“Good morning, my lord,” Countess Hadderly hailed brightly, her eyes wide at the sight of Nick and Nicole.
“Good morning,” the earl replied politely. He ignored the trio’s rude gaping.
“It’s quite the day for a drive,” she continued gaily.
“Quite.”
“I do say, is that a baby upon your lap?”
The earl refrained from making a sarcastic comment and decided to let her off the hook. “This is my daughter, Nicole.”
“Daughter!” It was gasped in unison by both women.
“B-but—” The lovely countess was flustered. “I had no idea you had a daughter, sir.”
The earl felt like saying “Neither did I,” but wisely did not. Suddenly the countess made the connection, and her eyes widened like saucers. “Her mother is your wife?”
“That is the usual, is it not?” the earl said calmly.
The countess looked as if she would choke upon the news.
“Good day,” the earl said with a polite smile. He rapped his crop upon the door for the driver to increase his speed, and they left the other party behind.
Well, it was done. Nicole could not be kept a secret.
She was his daughter, and one day would come into Society as was her right.
He was glad she was too young to be aware of the scandal that was forming even now.
When she was old enough to understand, it would be long since past. He lifted his gaze to find Molly watching him reprovingly.
He almost explained himself to the maid, but instead gave her a sharp stare, causing her to blush and drop her gaze. The earl then ordered the driver to return to Tavistock Square.