Chapter 9
NINE
D AKOTA
The next day, I’m at the ranch helping Hazel set up for what she’s deemed the “wedding games” this weekend. She’s pairing everyone off and making them compete to win a prize in lieu of having a bridal shower. The girls and I had planned for some more traditional games and pink champagne, but we could adapt.
“I don’t need more things. I just want more time with my friends and family, you know?” Hazel looks at me as we put together centerpieces for the tables. She’s been worried about making every detail perfect to make Ramsey happy, and he’s been worried about making sure every last thing is just the way she wants it. They’re adorable, and I’ve nearly forgiven him for everything he did. Which makes me a little short on Stockton hate these days and a lot in danger of liking them—one in particular.
“I feel the same way. Less stuff. More time spent with the people we love. There’s never enough of that.”
“Exactly!” She finishes the last piece with a bouquet of wildflowers and slides it off to the side. “But I did have to invite his siblings, you know, to keep the peace around here. Family unity and all that.” I can hear the uncertainty in her tone. She, more than anyone, knows my feelings about the family. She just doesn’t happen to know about recent developments.
“Ah. Do you think they’ll actually come?” My stomach flips at the thought of him being here, but I can’t imagine Grant Stockton at a wedding shower.
“Aspen already RSVPed.” Aspen is their one and only sister. She’s quite a bit older than Ramsey, and I’d only met her once or twice.
“Do we like Aspen?”
“We love Aspen. She checked in on me even after the divorce—er, the original divorce-not-divorce, not the accidental real one.” Hazel grimaces.
Hazel and Ramsey’s story is a long one. One you’d have to hear from her to even begin to understand the mess those two got themselves into last year.
“Well, that’s good. But Levi and Grant?” I try to sound nonchalant when I bring up his name. His being here this weekend would make this arrangement we’ve found ourselves in even trickier, and I’d like to know ahead of time.
“Who knows with them?” She looks up at me. “Will you be okay if Grant comes? I know the two of you have been getting along less and less.”
“I’ll be fine. He can stay on his side of the house, and I’ll stay on mine.” I grin at her, hoping she can’t see anything on my face .
“Am I crazy to split everyone up like that? I just felt like it would be fun. Plus, it’ll drive Ramsey insane to not be in the same bed as me for a weekend.” She gives me a mischievous grin.
“I don’t think you’re crazy for splitting people up. It’s like a giant slumber party. The guys can camp outside if they want to complain.” I can’t stop smiling when I look up at my best friend and I see the evil little grin on her face. She decided to have all the girls sleep in the bedrooms upstairs and the guys sleep downstairs, including her soon-to-be husband for the second time. “Keeping Ramsey at bay might be a little crazy.”
“I’m counting on it. Because the second you all are gone.” She bites her lower lip and stabs the floral foam with another round of greenery.
“I hope he uses a little more finesse than that.” I laugh.
She bursts out laughing and shrugs. “Depends on his mood—and mine.” The look of mischief returns to her face. “It’s part of why I want to see what happens if we’re separated for the weekend. We’ve been trying a new thing I’ve been loving though.”
“What’s that?” My brow furrows as I work to get the centerpiece into the glass jar.
“Free use.”
“Free use?” I quirk a brow as I manhandle the floral foam into the glass.
“Just like it sounds. He can have me anytime he wants me, any way he wants me, without asking. Unless I say the safe word.”
I blink. I could count the number of boyfriends I’ve had on one hand and how long we stayed together with even fewer fingers. They never live up to the promises they make at the start, and I won’t settle for anything less than what I give in return. But that means that there really hasn’t been the option for me to develop the sort of relationship Hazel and Ramsey have where they trust each other unequivocally, and it meant things like “free use” don’t even exist in my vocabulary.
“So you’re just… doing the laundry, bending over to pull something out of the dryer, and bam?” I ask, mulling over the idea in my head.
“Okay, that makes it sound not nearly as good as it is. He hasn’t tried that particular one.” She looks up at me with a distracted smile on her face. “But… Like the other day, he woke me up by going down on me for breakfast, and the other night, I was so frustrated running the software update at the inn that he just bent me over the front desk and railed me right there.”
“With guests in the inn?”
“It was late.”
“Where was Grace?” I blink. “I feel like you’d scandalize her for life.”
“In the back doing inventory. She’d be fine. She’s not as innocent as she looks.” She dismisses my concern for her inn manager.
“She looks like a preacher’s daughter.” I give Hazel a skeptical look in return.
Hazel shakes her head and laughs. “She’d probably just turn around and walk back out and then high-five me later. Plus, the risk is part of the fun. Also, he had just come in from the field, so he had the whole cowboy thing going on. So fucking hot.” Hazel nibbles her lower lip and stares into the distance.
I study my friend, thinking about everything that’s changed recently. It had been a rough few years for her after he left, and while I was ready to put the man six feet under if she said the word, I’m happy they found their way back to each other. Ramsey has a soft side that Grant doesn’t, one that’s completely exposed when it comes to Hazel. The kind of love you dream about growing up—the kind some part of me still wishes I could find even if reality has made it feel impossible.
“I love you two together.” I haven’t seen her this happy since the day she told me he’d finally asked her to be his girlfriend in college.
“So do I. Now we just need to find you your Prince Charming.”
“Easier said than done.” I sigh as I go back to assembling flower arrangements.
“I have a few ideas.” She wiggles her eyebrows but doesn’t look up at me.
“I hate to even ask.”
“Well, I wasn’t planning to tell. Have to keep some things up my sleeve.”
I was never much for surprises. They’re rarely a good thing.
“That’s ominous.”
“Oh stop. You’ll like this one.” She flashes a bright smile as she waves the scissors in my direction.
“Is that a threat?” I joke, and she hands me another arrangement to stuff inside a mason jar.
“Maybe.” She watches me for a moment. Long enough I start to feel a little self-conscious. “I mean, do you like being single? If you do, I don’t want to interfere. I support you however you want to do things. I just want you to be happy.”
“I… don’t know what I want.”
It’s a lie. What I want right now is for Grant Stockton to have the same sort of appetite his younger brother does. I’m imagining him giving up his stern big-brother act for good, right along with the rules he set, and bending me over the desk in his office while he whispers dirty things in my ear. He’ll never do it. It’s one thing to play games over text in secret. Another if it’s real.
“Dakota?” Hazel’s looking at me confused .
“Hmm?”
“You seemed far away there for a second.”
“Sorry. I just was thinking about what it must be like to be in the kind of relationship you and Ramsey have.”
“Would you ever get married?” Hazel asks. It seems like such a far-off concept for me. I don’t know that I’ve ever seriously considered it.
“Maybe someday? Hard to say when the men in my life have been… well… You’ve met them.” I grimace a little as I think back to some of the guys I’ve given the time of day to. I had to learn my lessons the hard way. Grant was right about that much.
“You will.” She gives me a sympathetic pat on the arm. “You just need to find the right guy. One who puts you first, and one who actually has his shit together enough to match your energy. Too many of them have been intimidated by your boss-bitch ways. We need someone who thinks that’s your best quality.”
I laugh. “Good luck to me with that. Trying to find a guy taller than me, likes my attitude, and doesn’t suck in bed? I think we’re looking for a unicorn.”
“I mean… If I can find Ramsey.”
“You think there’s more than one in this tiny little town?” I give her a cynical look.
“Doubtful, but then I think anything is possible. Maybe we just need to import some for you. Or you know… if you go on more trips. If you visited me in Cincinnati more this year. Guarantee I could work magic. There are unicorns everywhere. Just saying.” She’s gotten very optimistic in her Ramsey-reunited world. She breaks into laughter when she sees my face. “Fine. Fine. I just want to see you more. You and Bristol and Marlowe need to come out more. Have girls’ weekends with me and go to games. I miss you when I’m not here. And th ere are plenty of single guys in Cincinnati. Ones on the team even. You and Hayden seemed like you got along when he was here for New Year’s Eve.”
“We miss you, too, but I don’t know if Hayden is my unicorn. Or if Cincinnati even has what I’m looking for.”
“Maybe. Maybe not. You don’t know until you try. You could come with us when the season starts.” She hedges and gives me a sideways glance.
Maybe. Maybe I could run away and follow Hazel to Cincinnati for a while after they come back from their honeymoon. I might be able to escape this dangerous web that I’m willingly weaving with Grant. One I know only ends with disappointment.
Hayley and Gemma have been holding down the fort pretty well without me on nights like tonight. Getting away from the bar, truly getting away and not just being upstairs, would be huge for me to try to figure out the future.
But some small part of me keeps wishing I could find a unicorn closer to home.