Chapter 25 – Ryder #2
But right now, should can drown for all I care.
“You’re purring again,” she says in a sing-song tone, tipping her head until looking at me. “When do we have to go back?”
“Not for a while.”
“Good.”
Up close, the creases of her smile become prominent, as do the different shades of purple in her eyes. Her lids lower, chin tipping up. It’s every signal she’s begging to be kissed, but I wouldn’t be able to stop if I took her mouth.
It wouldn’t be a kiss to sooth every ache or take me home. It’d be the destructive kind. The kind that splits me open and leaves me vacant and hollow, aware a kiss is all I can have of her. The soft curve of lips would annihilate me with the offer of more, but reality makes it an impossible future.
For that reason, even though my insides tear apart and my wolf howls, I pull away and climb to my feet.
Staying away for the remainder of the day gets even more difficult after our afternoon together, but visiting Dad and going through all Xander’s prep work for tomorrow’s quarterly meeting distracts me.
For the first time in days, I join the others for dinner, claiming my place at the north end of the circle formed around the fire. Wooden log benches cut a V on either side of me, where everyone else sits. It’s loud and rambunctious, conversations flying everywhere.
Xander settles beside me, but immediately directs his attention to where Leah, Claire, and Carina are seated. Claire is pressed tight to Carina’s side, both grinning at one another in a way that makes my heart stop beating. Others are watching them as well, but not with disdain, only curiosity.
“You’re staring,” Xander mutters in my ear, low enough the others don’t overhear.
Of course I am. Who isn’t?
“Maybe there’s something to this mate thing, or she’s cast a spell on us all. But the others are warming to her, even taking to her magick.”
“There’s no spell. Not any she cast anyway.” It’s a lie; there is magick. Her damn soul is the influence on us all.
Xander starts conversing with Elias, seated on his other side. The two talk numbers for tomorrow’s outing—who wants to attend and who’s remaining behind. I tune them out, not caring.
“Bringing Carina?” Elias peers around Xander.
Showing up to the meeting where three other packs will be in attendance, with a witch in tow, will raise a lot of questions.
It could be dangerous, if someone were to piece together my behaviours.
My restraint can only be tugged on so much, and her presence will test every thread—each one tied to her.
“I don’t know,” I finally reply.
The other packs will be told about the Celestial war—and having her around could be useful. Even Dad made a point earlier about Carina’s presence being a measure of proof, but the idea of her there makes me unsettled.
As some finish eating, they retrieve entertainment from one of the storage longhouses.
While not a nightly routine, it’s common enough to change the atmosphere.
Soon, pups will run off to play before being sent to bed, while adults get lulled by drums once gifted to us from our greatest trading partner of the time, the Métis Nation of Alberta.
Since we’ve been around long before the colonization of North America, at one point we were friendly with the Indigenous peoples of the province.
We mostly avoided them, being that they were human, but unlike the cities of modern society, the early days were simple.
The Indigenous lived off the land, in small settlements, and we co-existed peacefully, often even trading tools and materials, as needed.
The drums have remained in the pack since and are taken out on special occasions or when the others feel the evening calls for it, to honour the people—our shifters and the Métis long passed. It’s curious, as Elias and Graham set up the drums, they’ve picked tonight.
A beat fills the space, drawing many conversations to a close. Carina gets enraptured by the music, smiling behind her hands before scanning around. She grins at Holly and Conan seated in front of her and then finds me.
Her look is brief, but after today it feels…precarious.
Pups take off to the side of the camp, and Claire holds out a hand out to Carina. “Please come play with us. You need to show my friends how cool your magick is because they don’t believe me!” She pouts, embracing every bit of her mother’s sass.
Suddenly, there’s a lineup of children surrounding Claire, all wide-eyed and pleading. Parents look amongst themselves, uncertain, and then at me, but no one stops the once-in-a-lifetime event unfolding.
Carina glances at Leah who simply shrugs, and then at me, her head tilting to the side with her silent question, which makes my wolf content. Her respect of authority, her subtle submissiveness makes him want to be freed and show her how that submissiveness can work when she’s beneath me.
But since that won’t be happening, I lift my chin in response.
Claire takes her hand, as though she has any chance of lifting a fully-grown adult off the log. Everyone observes as she joins the kids, acting unaware of her audience.
The drums become background noise when her hands lift and she begins wielding magick, first forming balls of water that earn excited whoops from the pups.
She lets them fall to the ground, creating puddles they immediately launch themselves in.
Once they’re all jumped out, she switches to create rain over the area.
The kids screech and run around, and Carina’s giggles rise above all the rest.
Perfect mate. Perfect mother.
Fuck, the wolf needs to shut up.
Sensing someone approaching, I rub my face to wipe away any feelings growing inside me and pretend I’m not about to lose it in front of everyone. Leah settles onto the other side of me, and now I’m shielded by the two who know me best.
She leans closer, cupping her neck while propping her elbows on her knees.
“I like her. She’s really sweet and fun to be around, especially when you’re busy.
Speaking of…” Her big eyes glitter in a way that has nothing to do with the fire’s blaze.
“Where’ve you been? You avoid her and then take her to the caves? ”
My responding low growl is a threat to not question her Alpha, which only makes Leah roll her eyes. “Give me a break. Fine, deny it all you want.”
“There’s nothing to deny,” I snap too quickly to be an effective lie.
As the music thrums and Carina’s games continue, her laughter does too. She glances over at me, a sexy smile lighting her up.
It makes looking at her physically hurt.
But looking away hurts more.