Chapter 16 Mischa #4
It doesn’t take me long to get to Brittany.
The water somehow drags me out to her. She’s so exhausted from fighting the undertow she can’t speak.
When she grabs me she pulls us both beneath the surface.
Water floods into my injured ear and the pain is like a hot poker being rammed inside it.
I push her off and we come back up and we are both fighting for air.
We are far closer to the big surf of the southern end than we should be.
A cresting wave comes towards us. I wait for it to get close and dive underneath.
Brittany tumbles with it and I lose sight of her.
I surface and Kai’s board cuts across my path and connects with my head.
In an instant everything goes black, and then.
.. I’m floating... propelled out of my body in spirit form.
I look down and see Austen climb the barrier from the Iceberg pool and leap into the water.
William follows him in. They pull my body down there to the sand.
Austen is trying to blow air into my mouth and William is doing chest compressions.
I can also see my dad.
My real dad, standing in a heavy winter suit, looking up at me. He is smiling. The Labrador looks up as well and gives a friendly wag. I do not understand anything that is happening. I do not know what to do, and I feel scared.
“It’s okay,” he says. “There’s nothing to fear.”
“Are you dead?” I ask, and he nods. “Am I dead?”
“Not yet,” he says. “But I want you to know I love you, and I forgive you.”
All at once, I feel extremely sad, but I can’t cry, and memories I haven’t thought of in forever come flooding back.
“I’m sorry,” I say.
“Your mother forgives you too.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay,” he says. “But you have to kill him.”
I don’t know who him was. I can feel myself fading away.
The fear and pain we all run from in this life lifts off me.
The desire we cling to leaves me also. Then even time and thoughts disappear, until nothing remains but my own consciousness.
All the things that make me human are gone.
I have left the beach, and I’m going somewhere far away, into a sea of light.
The only thought I have left is of Austen and I don’t want to let it go.
Then I feel the heat of a hot summer’s day, and soft lips on mine, and I realize I’m not breathing and my chest is fighting to get air into itself and I convulse awake and cough up foamy water onto the wet sand beside me.
“He’s okay!” Austen yells.
He slaps my back hard to get the water and mucus out. I collapse back into his lap and he holds me.
Kai is panicked, standing around holding his backwards hat and feeling sorry for himself.
Bondi lifeguards are assisting Brittany.
When she is stable one of them runs over and drops down to look at me.
He’s blonde, but his skin is brown from the beating sun.
He has three stripes of thick red, yellow and blue sunblock face paint across his cheeks and bridge of his nose.
His face crinkles into a smile as he looks me over.
“Well done boys,” he says. “I think you saved his life.”
The sun is dazzling. My head feels like it’s ablaze. Austen is holding me, shaking. He’s really emotional, and Will is trying to smooth it all over.
“He’s fine,” William insists. “We should probably go. There are cameras... these guys have it under control...”
“You cannot be serious right now,” Austen hisses back at him, and clings to me.
???
The hospital is a short ride. Austen holds on to me until we have to go.
Brittany and I are in the same ambulance but we’re too fucking tired to speak.
We are put on opposite sides of the ward.
I call Maxim and tell him what happened.
He tells me he’ll bring the wallet we took from his brother for all the paperwork.
I don’t have insurance, so at least we won’t have to worry about that.
William walks in my room with Sabrina and Isobelle.
“Britt's fine,” he says. “Austen and Amelia are getting drinks.”
A few minutes later a nurse escorts Austen and Amelia to my bed. The monitor changes from the steady, rhythmic beat as my heart jumps, seeing Austen. It screams beep beep beep! The machine telling on me only makes my heart beat faster.
The nurse looks at me and looks behind me, bemused. "Relax,” she says. “Try breathing slow.”
Austen looks at the monitor, taking in the new evidence. William is amused at my growing discomfort.
“Hi,” Amelia says.
“Hi,” I say, and press my lips together, looking at the floor.
“Are you okay?” she asks.
“I have to stay for a little while longer.”
She frowns. “You have to be at the airport in an hour.”
The nurse scoffs. “He won’t even be discharged in an hour.”
Amelia is worried. “Shit, you’re going to miss the flight.”
“You should get going,” I tell her.
“We want you and Amelia to come with us to New Zealand,” Isobelle says.
The monitor jumps again. I look up at the ceiling and try to relax.
I take a deep breath. “Thank you Isobelle, but I can’t impose on you.”
“We won’t leave until you agree to come.”
“I’d like to have a word with Mischa,” William tells everyone. “Why don’t you all go check on Brittany?”
Austen looks nervous, and William shoos him out the room.
“That was entertaining,” William sniggers, when he comes back to my bed.
I am mortified, and feel myself flush. I do not flush. I do not get mortified. People do not get under my skin. I’m fucking deadly. I’m a fucking gangster.
“Shut up,” I say.
“Oh come on. I don’t just mean that, I mean seeing you nearly die. This has been the most interesting day of the whole trip.”
My heart starts pounding harder again, but this time it’s because I want to kill this asshole.
“You actually don’t need these anymore,” the nurse says, touching the monitors taped to my chest.
“Fucking hell,” I say, and rip them off. “Ouch.”
“Well, that’s one way to do it,” she says, and walks off.
“I didn’t realize the extent of your feelings for Amelia.”
I frown at him. “I don’t know what you are talking about.”
“Look, if I had any idea you were in this deep, I wouldn’t have played cupid.”
I growl in frustration. “I’m sick of this. I want it to stop.”
“Stop what?”
“This joyless, sexless fucking holiday. My life was perfect. I used to fuck whoever I wanted and didn’t get attached.
A lot. Now I’m all obsessed and the thought of fucking anyone else makes me sick.
I didn’t choose this, it just took over my body like a fucking demon but I feel like a creep and an awkward loser when I try make a move.
The possibility of rejection haunts me. I worry that I’ll ruin any chance of future happiness with one misstep.
I have lost my common sense. I want it to be over, and back to lots of meaningless sex. Preferably anonymous too.”
“Oh dear,” Will laughs. “I can help you. Isobelle asked Amelia to go to Fiordland with us, she said yes, and Austen is very unhappy about it. He’s not as interested in her as I hoped.
Now the girls want you there, to even it out, and Isobelle says she’s gonna dump me if you don’t come. We can help each other fix this.”
I look at William like he’s insane.
“Austen’s taking Sabrina,” I remind him. “His fiancé. How do you think this will end?”
“Sabrina is... stupid,” William shrugs. “She’s the one who wants you and Amelia there. What’s done is done. Please keep Amelia company.”
“And Sabrina and Isobelle think it’s all totally cool and normal to bring the side piece?”
“They’ll think what I tell them to think.”
I’m deeply confounded by Isobelle and Sabrina. They don't fit right. Perhaps observing them closely will explain what I’m seeing.
But there’s something else. My superpower is sounding the alarm.
I search William’s eyes. “You’re lying.”
“What?” he asks.
“Those girls think for themselves. You don’t think Sabrina’s stupid. It disgusted you to say that.”
William’s jaw drops open. “Damn, you’re good.”
“How do you really feel about Sabrina?”
His face flashes pure love. Holy shit.
“She’s okay, I guess...”
This is conflicting.
“I’m not gonna help you steal her from Austen if that’s....”
He throws his head back and laughs. “Oh, bless your sweet heart! It’s not like that! She’s not my type.”
“She’s everyone’s type.”
“Not mine!” he splutters. “You got nothing to worry about there. She’s more like a sister to me than anything.”
I can see that...
“Why do you really want me to come?”
“It’s not like I have some sort of agenda, or something. Isobelle’s the boss, and always gets her way, so please come with us.”
I can feel his silken tendrils turning into a web.
“Jesus Christ, what are you planning?”
William holds up his hands like he’s trying to stop me throwing a basketball into a hoop.
“It’s nothing bad,” he explains. “It’s true about Amelia coming, but I want you there because I just want Austen to have a friend, that’s all.
He seems so comfortable with you. He even seemed upset when he thought you had drowned.
I think he sees you as a friend, and that never happens.
You have even touched him a few times and he hasn’t flinched. ”
William shows an emotion that I’ve never seen in him before. Guilt.
“He trusts you and he needs someone in his life. Please be his friend.”
“Okay,” I say. “That was the truth. So that’s the whole reason? Nothing else?”
“No. Nothing else.”
I cross my arms. “Lying.”
He closes his eyes and rolls them. “Okay,” he sighs.
“He ditches the bodyguards every chance he gets. He's sick of them. He even told me I was suffocating him—which is ridiculous. He needs someone who can handle himself, is mentally tough, obviously familiar with guns, will protect him, and who he’d never suspect. You tick every box on my wish list, to be honest. I also really like you as a person, by the way. You’re a pretty cool guy. ”
I gag a little. “I have obligations. Shit I need to do back home, and I just did you a favor and you fucked me over.”
“But I’ll still owe you that favor! And I’d pay you a hundred grand for the week. I mean, you work at a pizzeria, you need the money.”
I blanch at him. “Will, I promise you, I don’t need anything from you...”
William looks skeptical. “You’re rejecting my offer?”
In a split second I realize I’m giving up the thing I want because Captain Dickhead wants it too.
“I didn’t say that.”
“Oh?” his eyebrows shoot up.
“Will, at that bar, in Alice Springs, when you almost slit my throat...”
“I’m fucking sorry, okay?”
“I’m just worried for you. You sort of are suffocating Austen. All the security in the world now won’t help you deal with something that has already happened in the past. You need to talk to someone, get treatment...”
“Okay seriously, shut up; you don’t know what you’re talking about. I want to tell you something, so never repeat what I’m about to say, okay?”
I shrug. “Sure.”
“Or I’ll put a bullet in you, yes?”
“I won’t tell anyone, so you don’t need to threaten me.”
“I’m not trying to deal with what happened, Mischa. I’m trying to stop something happening again.”
“What?” I sit bolt upright. “You think Austen’s in danger?”
“I can’t be sure,” he shakes his head. “My mind is playing tricks. It’s been a nightmare.
Someone was after him in France, so we left.
There were these threatening letters. They knew stuff about us that only me, Austen and Isobelle know.
Then it started again after a couple of months in America, I think, but my mind is a strange and terrifying place.
You know I’m not well, you’ve seen it. I don’t know anything anymore.
I never used to be this bad. I’m dealing with it.
I have been dealing with it. My therapist is expensive, believe me.
Since we got to Australia I feel better.
It’s going to be okay, I just need to figure some things out. ”
“And that’s why you want me?”
“Yes! You’ve made this trip so good! You’re always around so I don’t have to worry if Kane and Hayden aren’t there. I don’t want to give up that peace of mind just yet. I want to go hunting next week, alone. Please.”
“Okay. I think you might be bi-polar.”
“Really? I think I might be manic-depressive.”
“Same thing, Will. I’m serious, I...”
“I’m joking,” he huffs. “Maybe. I just need to relax, rest my brain for a few days, and not worry about my fucking stupid brother all the time.”
“I won’t do anything I think might hurt Sabrina and Austen, even if you want me to.”
“Of course.”
“If you make a move on her, I will tell on you.”
“I won’t.” Will presses his palms together like he’s praying. “Please help me.”
He’s handing me Austen, like a gift tied with a bow for me to unwrap. Must be careful now. Don’t want to spook the scatterbrained brother.
“Maybe... yeah. Maybe I could. I could protect Austen. Take care of him.”
“Yeah?”
William hugs me round my middle like I’m a life raft. I pat his crazy head.
“I mean... yeah, of course... hot girl... free holiday... on a boat... getting paid... fuck yeah I’m coming!”