29. Freya
FREYA
F or the first time in a long time, I feel in control.
River’s gaze is a physical caress and the way this dress binds my body like silken ropes has me burning for him. I don’t have to think about it, the words fall from my lips with ease because for once I know exactly what I want.
“Touch me, River.”
Despite asking for it, I’m not prepared for the ferocity with which River’s lips take mine.
His hands cradle my head as he imprints his kiss on my skin, his teeth tugging at my lower lip so he can force his tongue inside.
He takes my mouth like he owns it but when my hands loop around his neck he hesitates.
He breaks off the kiss, his forehead pressed against mine as he holds himself back.
“River?”
Deep brown pools sink into me when he opens his eyes. “I love you, Freya. I need you to know that. I want to love you like you deserve. I want to worship you.”
The words are too soft for River but desperation dances at his edges and I want to give him what he needs so I nod.
He lifts me up into his arms, my legs escaping through the long slits in the dress as I hook them around River’s waist. We kiss again, this time gentler, more tender, before he carries me upstairs to his room.
River sets me down in front of his bed and I glance around to see this room too has been decorated with fairy lights.
The little white stars twinkle against the navy walls and dark oak furniture.
It’s so not River and I know he did it for me, just like he lit the kitchen with candles and cooked food his mother taught him, all for me.
I was half-way to forgiving him the second I walked into the living area and saw how much effort he’d gone to.
Amusement twitches my lips as I take in the decorations. “Confident, were we?” I’m only teasing but River shakes his head, his expression somber.
“Hopeful,” he corrects, stepping up to me. His fingers hook under the black material on my shoulders. “May I?”
My brows dip softly because River never asks for permission, but I nod.
He draws the dress off my shoulders and down my chest, my nipples pebbling as the tension-laden air hits my skin. Just the feel of the dress catching on the hardened peaks has my knees trembling.
River brings the dress down to my waist but leaves the skirt in place. His hand cups my cheek, again, so gentle. “Wait here.”
He walks over to his chest of drawers and strips off his shirt before coming back with two lengths of black rope. He traces the dress at my hip, his finger dusting my bare stomach. “I should be punishing you for not wearing the dress I left out but the one you chose has given me ideas.”
My stomach flips.
River takes the ropes in his hands and ties a small loop knot before laying the black strands over my shoulders. The knot rests between my shoulder blades, the material softer than I expected. He walks behind my back and comes to a stop. His hands drop away. “I’m going to fucking kill Eli.”
My mouth parts as I remember the initials cut into my shoulder and I spin to face River, my hands fluttering to his chest. “It’s fine. River, I asked him to. I wanted it.”
His nostrils flare as he works his jaw in a circle. “You’re okay?”
“I’m fine.” I tilt my head. “If it helps, I gave him my initial too.”
River shakes his head on a soft laugh before grabbing the rope and tugging me towards him. “You’re fucking trouble, you know that?”
I smirk. “Sorry, Sir”
He runs his tongue over his teeth but his eyes sparkle. “Turn around. I’ve got work to do.”
I do as he says and proceed to watch, utterly entranced, as River circles me, weaving the rope down and around my naked torso, creating large diamonds across my chest. He works in silence, absorbed in his task.
A soft breath escapes me when the ropes brush against my breasts and again when he loops the two black lengths between my legs, where my upper thighs meet my core.
He stills when the back of his hand brushes against my center, his voice a growl. “No panties?”
“Oops,” I breathe out, not sorry in the slightest.
River tugs the harness he’s creating, the ropes tightening around me.
I gasp, taking that for the scolding it was as River continues to work.
“When did you learn to do this?” I whisper in awe as the pattern comes together.
“Jack, the man who helped with your mother, taught me when I was in the academy. I wasn’t always as controlled as I am now, and I was never good at taking orders.” He finishes tying a knot. “I find working with ropes meditative.”
I can see why. A firm calmness has settled over me as River weaves the ropes around my body. It’s like when Jude drew on my skin, I’m completely absorbed in watching River as he turns me into a work of art.
When he retrieves another, shorter rope from his chest of drawers and tells me to lie down I assume he’s going to tie me to the bed. Instead, he loops the rope around my right wrist before securing the other end to his own wrist.
He straddles me and tugs on our connected wrists to pull me to sitting. “Is it wrong that I want to keep you tied to me like this forever?”
A battle rages in his eyes and for the first time I realize how much it hurts him, how much it scares him, to let me out of his sight.
“It’s not wrong to want it,” I tell him softly, “only to do it. You have to let me fly, River, or I’ll end up broken.”
His gaze embeds into mine. “I’d die before I let you break.”
I raise my free hand to the back of his neck and pull him down towards me. “Just love me, River. That’s all I need.”
And he does.
I’m guided back to the bed as River presses his chest to mine and works to free himself from his pants. The rope rubs against the apex of my thighs as I part my legs.
I moan when River presses the thick head of his cock against my core. He draws the tip up and down my folds, gathering my wetness before notching himself at my entrance.
My desperate, needy sounds and his low breaths mingle together as he eases inside of me. River brings our joined wrists above my head, interlocking his fingers with mine the moment he bottoms out.
He left my dress around my waist so the silk waterfalls past my legs as I hook them around River’s back, drawing him even deeper.
“Fuck me, River,” I say, needing more.
He doesn’t though. He makes love to me, gliding in and out at a torturously slow pace.
So slow I feel every veined ridge on his cock against my inner walls. Each slight movement is heightened by the ropes rubbing against my body and need and desire climb inside me until I’m so high up I’m floating.
He moves in long, deep thrusts and then his free hand hooks under the harness of ropes on my chest and he lifts me up till I’m sitting on his cock, my thighs straddling his knees.
My hips circle instinctively and River growls, his fist tightening around the ropes.
“That’s it, darling, grind your sweet pussy on me. Take what you need.” He tugs me closer, and the ropes press against my back, the sensation scattering over every part of me.
“I can smell how needy you are. Feel your heat drenching my cock.” His lips crush mine.
“You have no idea what you do to me,” he pants when he comes up for air. “I love you, Freya.” He moves his hold on the ropes from my chest to the loop at my throat and pulls it tight. “Run and fight this as much as you want, darling, but I will always love you.”
My chest expands beneath the ropes, River’s words pouring into all the cuts and scars and filling the cracks with light. My love for him is a living, breathing thing beating inside my heart and I lose myself in the dark depths of his eyes.
“I love you too, River. I never stopped loving you.”
He uses his grip on the harness to lower me back down to the bed and then he takes over, thrusting deeper inside of me until my lips are parted, silent pleasure bursting from my core and cascading all over me.
River’s length pulses, his release hot against my inner walls as we reach our climax together. Tied together. In love together.
I settle back into the bed, letting River’s scent surround me. For the first time since the guys found me at Carmen’s, that love doesn’t scare me.
The guys and I will be just fine. I get the feeling River will accept nothing less.