Chapter Twenty-Five
A pale, greasy dawn crawled over William’s face, barely able to chase the lingering shadows of the night. It was going to be damp and hot today, and his strength had been sapped away. Claudia had left before sunset yesterday, and he was pervaded by a strange hollowness as he found his bed empty.
There were so many things to fix, so many things to get right. Claudia was going to face St Cross. And he still hadn’t managed to talk calmly with Eric. His brother had withdrawn to his room yesterday afternoon and had not reappeared since.
Heavy steps echoed in the corridor and halted in front of his door.
‘Will?’ Eric’s hoarse voice came muffled through the door. ‘Are you awake?’
‘Yes.’
‘Are you dressed?’
‘I’m in bed.’
Silence.
‘Listen…Can we talk for a moment?’
He sat up, but he did not leave the comfort of his sheets.
‘Come in.’
Eric appeared in the doorframe, pale and livid like a man consumed from within. He looked like he had been ill all night.
‘Oh, Eric…What happened?’
Eric sat at the foot of the bed.
‘What I did yesterday was unforgivable, Will. I was angry, but I should never have behaved like that. I don’t know what I would have done if Lady Claudia hadn’t stepped between us.’
‘You would have picked me up by the scruff and shaken me a bit, and I would have deserved it.’ William shrugged. ‘You are not like our father, if that’s what you are thinking.’
For a moment Eric looked a little more alive.
‘You think so?’
‘I am absolutely certain. You’re pretty scary when you get angry, but you would have never harmed me. I know that.’
Eric smiled wearily, visibly heartened but also completely exhausted.
‘I saw red,’ he raked a hand through his long hair. ‘I was so damn scared that all we have built would collapse on us—’
William reached for his hand and squeezed it a bit.
‘Was it really bad tonight?’
‘Yeah. Having Iris at my side makes it less frightening. It’s good not to be alone. But it’s not a cure, is it? There is no cure.’
‘It will take time to heal. But we’ll get there, I’m sure.’
‘Listen, Will, now that we’re both a little calmer…’ Eric swallowed hard and blushed. ‘I spoke at length with Iris about this. And we reached the conclusion that you…ah…that you must love her, don’t you? Lady Claudia, I mean.’
‘I do.’ There was no point denying it anymore, either to Eric or to himself.
‘We thought so. We thought you wouldn’t risk turning a powerful ally into an enemy over just another lover.’
‘She’s not another lover, Eric. She’s the only lover I ever had.’
The words escaped him before he could stop them, but it did not matter. It was inconceivable to keep that pretence up a moment longer, now that his heart belonged to her.
‘Oh? I don’t think I can follow…’
‘It so happens—it so happens that I had never been with a woman before her.’
Eric looked as though he had been hit on the head by a brick.
‘I—you lost me there, Will.’
‘ It so happens that Lady Claudia is the only woman I have ever slept with. Or done anything with. Or loved. Ever. Would you like me to write it down for you?’
‘But—but—the Ambassador’s wife…the Gazette Internationale —’
‘They’re just rumours!’ He was most definitely not going to explain what he had been up to instead. That would really get him strangled.
‘But…you relentlessly mocked me for keeping myself for Iris for years! You led us to believe—'
‘Hell, what was I supposed to say? That I was still—you know—at eight and twenty? You and Ed would have never given me a moment of respite anymore. Don’t even try and deny it.’
‘Edmund!’ Eric’s face lit up. ‘Oh my God, we need to tell Edmund!’
‘For the love of God, don’t!’
‘Need to tell me what?’ Edmund walked in—shirtless, of course.
Oh no…
‘Sit down Ed,’ Eric said with a stern face. ‘This is serious.’
‘Damn…What has he done? Aside from fucking that meddlesome spinster, that is.’
Ed sat down.
‘So. Edmund. Our little brother, this filthy little liar…’
William placed his hands on his ears to block all sound, eyes closed, and gritting his teeth. After a few moments, he opened one eye.
Ed looked completely dumbfounded for a moment.
Then he started laughing so hard, wheezing and crying, that the whole room seemed to shake.
God, why did men behave this way? That was exactly why he had kept it to himself.
‘Oh—this is just—perfect, just—perfect!’ Ed shook with laughter.
‘Our little brother has become a man.’ Eric ruffled his hair.
He wanted to disappear. The only positive was that his brothers no longer wanted to skin him alive.
‘Well, little brother, congratulations!’ Ed shook his hand. ‘Now let’s hear the details. Is she stern like a lieutenant colonel in bed too? What was she doing to you yesterday when you were screeching like a demon? Come on, tell us everything!’
‘I’d rather die.’
‘Did she at least have the decency of offering marriage after she compromised you?’
‘Hilarious, Ed.’
‘On that note, Will…what are you going to do now?’ Eric turned serious again. ‘Does she return your feelings?’
‘I…I think so.’
‘Her family will let you court her over their dead bodies. If they catch wind of it, they’ll take her from you and go back to England. And we’re ruined, but that’s just on the side.’
‘I doubt they could force her to do anything she doesn’t want to do. But I take your point.’
‘I just don’t want you to get hurt, Will.’ Eric placed a hand on his shoulder.
‘I appreciate that. But I can take care of myself.’
The church bells struck eight in the morning. Claudia must be heading out to meet St Cross. He’d think about the future later. Being there for her was all that mattered now.
‘Well, that was unpleasant, gentlemen. I hope there will be no more questions on the matter.’
‘Oh no. This was just the beginning.’ Edmund grinned roguishly. ‘We’ll want to hear all the details about the exciting things you learn. By the way, have you tried—’
‘Ah, cut it out, Ed, will you? Now, if you could kindly leave me to dress, I have places to be.’