Chapter Twenty-Eight
William paced back and forth in busy Via dei Condotti . It was torture to wait there. What was taking them so long? If only they came out already!
He was about to go in himself when they emerged.
They were all even paler than usual, walking unsteadily and squinting into the light, as though they had witnessed something gruesome in the dark. But as soon as they walked out, Claudia searched the street for him . And when their eyes met, he knew he could no longer pretend that they weren’t each other’s destiny.
He ran across the street, bumping into a passerby, elbowing past Rabey, and before he knew it his arms had wrapped around her. A current joyful and boisterous like Life itself coursed from her body to his and back. It climbed to his heart, to his head, until it roared like thunder and exploded into a golden mist. And in that shimmering haze he saw something more real than his life itself. He saw the two of them walking a million steps holding hands, across cities and gardens and country lanes, and up and down the stairs of a safe and loving house. A million steps until the end of days.
And though he should know better, he tilted her head up and caught her mouth. She froze for a split instant, then she eased into his kiss, welcoming his tongue, until he pushed her against the wall of a palazzo and they were kissing each other breathless.
I love you, Claudia.
I love you so damn much.
‘ Lorenz ,’ Rabey ordered, ‘ trenne diese Trottel!... Separate these idiots!’
Lorenz’s freezing cold hand pulled him back roughly.
‘That’s quite enough, you two…need to be smarter than this…if you want this to end well…’
They smiled guiltily. Claudia was out of breath, flustered, looking so terribly kissable that he had to step back not to devour her lovely lips again. They turned around to look at the others. Adela’s jaw had dropped. Lorenz was looking at them a little too closely. William shuddered. Lorenz was slight like a greyhound but unfeeling and debauched like a demon. You could never quite tell whether he was mentally undressing you or scheming to slit your throat.
‘Let’s just go home…all of us…shall we? We’ll have a drink…Need something strong…after a day like this.’
William offered Claudia his arm. She was very pale and shaken. The best he could do was to be there with her, without pressing her for details. He squeezed her hand affectionately.
Something was watching his every move, observing the way his fingers were brushing against Claudia’s. Or the way she pressed herself lightly to his body as they walked.
What the—
Lorenz was walking silently right next to them, head tilted like a spoiled cat toying with an agonising mouse.
Goddamn you, Lorenz. Fucking eerie.
‘Can I help you, Lorenz?’
‘So. I was thinking. What if the three of us—’
‘Stop right there!’
‘Your loss.’ Lorenz shrugged.
‘You have no idea…what we saw in there…Campbell.’ Rabey changed the topic. ‘A misery so deep…’
‘It clings to your clothes.’ Lorenz concurred. ‘I need a bath. Why don’t you and Klaudi take a bath together, Campbell? I will just sit there and watch. You will not notice me at all.’
That shook Claudia from her thoughts.
‘Eww, Lori, no! William is mine .’ She pulled him even closer, and their fingers interlocked on his arm. He grinned so hard that his mouth ached.
Yes, yours. Forever, if you’ll have me.
‘How very unadventurous of you, Klaudi. Fine then. No watching. But I still need a bath. And a drink. God, I need a drink.’
‘Let’s have a drink now, then…just so you shut up…’ Rabey grumbled. He looked around. ‘Over there.’
They entered a busy café and sat at a big round table in a corner. Claudia propped herself up with her elbows on the crisp white tablecloth and hid her face in her hands.
William placed his hand on her shoulder.
‘Are you all right?’
She inhaled deeply.
‘I just need a moment.’
He poured some water for her.
‘Would you like me to walk you home instead?’
‘No, not at all.’ She sipped from her glass. ‘I am happy to spend some time all together. I love that you met them before you even knew me. And that they treat you like one of their own. Normally they don’t let anyone near, you know?’
‘I know. Maybe you and I were meant to be, don’t you think?’
‘Quite,’ she smiled with that subtle smile that made her look like an ancient oracle.
‘Drinks!’ Lorenz announced, distributing several glasses full to the brim with a dark brown liquid.
Rabey inspected it suspiciously.
‘Go slowly with it, Rabey, yes?’ William said softly, ‘you never drink.’
‘Neither do you…let’s just share this one…for now, yes?’
‘Good idea.’
‘So, to Klaudi and Campbell!’ Lorenz raised his glass.
‘To Klaudi and Campbell!’
They all clinked glasses.
The dark liqueur burned his throat. After the first round Claudia told him of what had happened in St Cross’s palazzo . After the second, they were leaning towards each other as if nobody else existed, their legs pressed close. After the third, her hand was on his thigh under the table and he was whispering on her neck all the filthy things he’d do to her that night, but he kept on losing track of what he was saying and what was anatomically possible, so they were both half desperately aroused and half laughing senselessly.
‘All right…let’s get out of here…before these two get at it…in public.’
‘You really can’t handle your drink, Campbell.’ Lorenz pitied him. ‘And neither can you, brother. The ladies here are showing both of you up.’
Well, no wonder. Growing up with his father had been enough to make him wish never to even smell strong liquors again. But today was different. It felt a little like a Carnival day, or as if everyone had narrowly survived a catastrophe and was relieved to be alive. Still, they shouldn’t have drunk that much, because now they were all unsteady on their feet. The summer heat outside was so thick that it was almost tangible. It almost made them sick. The passersby were sweating and cursing in a myriad of languages.
‘Drink done.’ Lorenz slurred. ‘Now I need a bath. Without Campbell and Klaudi. Got the message.’
They all shuffled drowsily along a great trafficked street, with no sense of where they were. The crowd thickened—it was almost impossible to move. When William looked up, he understood why. They were at the Fountain of Trevi. People were ohhhh -ing and aaaaah -ing at the bright white statues. Painters were depicting it on their flimsy easels. A group of French ladies were throwing coins into the large basin. The clear water trickled invitingly.
‘Look Lorenz.’ William gestured at the fountain. ‘A bath. Shall we?’
‘A lovely idea,’ he drawled. ‘Are you in too, brother?’
‘Oh.’ Rabenstein looked as though a brick had just hit him on the head. ‘But you can’t bathe in there.’
‘Watch us.’ Lorenz headed for the basin.
‘But…your uniform! You can’t dishonour…the uniform!’
‘ Ach, die Uniform . I almost forgot!’ Lorenz rolled his eyes and began undoing the buttons of his jacket.
‘Come on Rabey. I’m only going if you come with me.’
‘Ah, goddamn it!’ Rabey snarled. He began undressing, exposing the muscular expanse of his scarred chest. There were hysterical shrieks from the group of French ladies.
‘What—keep that shirt on! I don’t want Claudia looking at you instead of me.’
‘Ridiculous. She has eyes…only for you…Where is she anyway?’
William stepped on tiptoe. Claudia was a couple of steps away, talking animatedly with Adela.
***
‘Of course I love him! I just haven’t told him yet.’ Claudia and Adela were holding each other’s arms for mutual stability. The world around her was a blurry and sunny carousel.
‘Then what are you waiting for? Come on, go and tell him!’
‘Not in this state! I didn’t know I couldn’t handle a couple of drinks.’
Yes, she must be dead drunk. There was no other rational explanation as to why she was seeing Will and the Rabenstein brothers wading into the Fountain of Trevi—Moritz and Lori stripped naked to the waist—to the sound of women squealing and fanning themselves.
‘How—what just happened?’
Will sought her gaze and gave her a flash of his devilish smile. He took off his shirt, exposing his lean, toned chest. It was enough to make her crave to trail her tongue all over it, and over every surface of his body.
There was a frenzy from the crowd. Two women a couple of steps away swooned. She almost combusted with jealousy.
Mine! He’s mine!
Will bit his lip teasingly and threw her his shirt. The squealing reached a fever pitch.
‘Lucky you!’ A pretty lady sighed.
‘Are those your husbands?’ Another woman addressed them in French.
‘Not all of them.’ Adela raised an eyebrow. ‘Only the one on the left, the prettiest one. That’s her husband.’
There was a mutter of disappointment and admiration from the crowd, but Claudia barely heard it because her whole heart resonated with the words Adela had just uttered.
Her husband.
She looked up. More people were wading into the fountain, tentatively at first, then riotously. Men, women, and children, cheering and chatting in all languages. Will was splashing the Rabenstein brothers and they were laughing. His infectious warmth, his gentleness, his charm seemed to shine over everyone around him like comforting sunbeams. He had brought that very lightness and gentleness to her life.
Adela wrapped an arm around her shoulders.
‘Go and tell him that you love him, Klaudi. You are wonderful together, and you both deserve all the happiness that comes your way. Every single little bit of it . ’
‘Claudia, my darling.’ Will called her. ‘Come in!’
She climbed agilely over the edge of the basin and reached him among the thick crowd, stumbling as her skirts became heavy with water, until she was clinging to his wet skin, hugging him tight and laughing.
‘Will, there’s something I’d like to—’
‘I’m afraid I’m dying to tell you something first, Claudia. I’m sorry that I’m a little bit drunk. But if I wait another moment I will literally die. Right here. In the Fountain of Trevi.’
‘It must be serious then.’
‘It is.’ He brought her hand to his lips and kissed it softly. ‘I need you to know that this is not an infatuation for me. This is forever. I want a future and a lifetime with you. Yes, a lifetime to discover who we are when we are not fixating on believing that we don’t deserve happiness.’ He cupped her face with his hands and pressed his wet forehead to hers. ‘I love you, Claudia.’
She laced her hands behind his waist, all trembling.
‘And I love you too, Will.’
‘You—you do?’ He smiled brightly.
‘Yes, of course I do. And I shall love you, and adore you, and look after you for as long as you let me.’
The way they kissed in the fountain, as the blinding sunlight cast dancing shimmers over their wet clothes, was the last thing they vividly remembered of that day. Because then they headed for more drinks at the Rabensteins’, and the afternoon dissolved into scattered fragments, the jagged pieces of a mirror reflecting the beginning of their new life.
***
It felt like home, it felt like family. Sitting at the dinner table, laughing senselessly, ravenously devouring Strudel like when they were children. But Will was with her now. Their fingers interlocked, so tightly their knuckles turned white.
He’s mine.
‘So, to Campbell and Klaudi again?’ Adela raised her glass.
‘To all of us!’ Will said.
‘To all of us!’
Lorenz popped open another bottle of champagne. Claudia had never seen so much champagne in her life.
***
Claudia?
The space next to him on the settee was empty now. A large shadow loomed over him. Rabey sat down and they clinked glasses. It must have been the millionth time that day. He no longer had any idea of what time it was—and how long they’d been celebrating.
‘You’ll look after her, Campbell, won’t you?…make her happy…’
‘I will do everything I can.’
He rested his hand on Rabey’s arm. For the first time, his friend did not withdraw.
Oh?
Rabey placed his hand on his. It was unnaturally warm. Was he unwell?
‘I don’t think you understand what…your friendship has come to…mean to me, Campbell.’
Rabey’s eye searched his face. Then he clumsily wrapped his arms around him and embraced him so tightly that he gasped. He could hear a lifetime of sorrow echo in Rabey’s chest, like the wind howling in a freezing ruin.
***
‘Ha. Look at them cuddle.’ Lorenz sneered. His ice-grey eyes looked like dirty snow stained with blood. ‘Pathetic. Aren’t you jealous?’
Claudia looked up. On the settee across her, William was sleeping deeply on Moritz’s chest. A smile spread to her lips.
‘What’s pathetic about it?’ Adela took the drink from Lorenz’s hand with a worried look. ‘I want a hug too, Klaudi.’
‘Come here.’
She wrapped her arm around Adela’s shoulders.
‘Lori wants it too, by the way. He just will never ask because he is so very tough.’
Lorenz sat next to Claudia on the settee and crossed his legs on the coffee table. He untied his cravat, uncovering a large purple bruise on his neck. He looked at her defiantly.
Claudia tilted his head gently to inspect the bruise.
‘I wish you didn’t box, Lori. I wish you looked after yourself.’
He slapped her hand away.
‘And I wish you minded your own business at least once in your life. But we can’t have everything, can we?’
She loathed his boxing injuries, and not just because of what had happened to her guests and to her. They reminded her of when she had found him tied up and bruised all over, when he was just a boy, so many years ago—
‘Stop looking at me like that!’ He hissed. ‘I want to hear nothing about it. Leave me alone.’
‘I—I’m sorry.’ She made to stand.
‘No.’ He placed his freezing hand on her arm. ‘Don’t listen to me. Stay.’
She groaned inwardly. It was always like this. He made life impossible for those who loved him, just to test whether they would still stand by him. And to feel confirmed in his cynicism when they left.
He shuffled closer to her on the settee. When he rested his head on her shoulder, it felt a little like the last piece of a puzzle was slotting in. Her whole world was in this room. The Rabensteins and Will.
My family.
Her hands were holding Adela and Lorenz, so when tears came, she could not dry them.
But Lorenz tensed. He sat up and looked out of the window into the nocturne street, alarmed.
‘Did you see that just now, Klaudi?’
‘What do you mean? There’s nothing out there.’
‘But there is .’ Lorenz hissed. ‘I see them all the time. They linger outside our windows, quietly, and just watch. They have come to haunt us for what we did.’
A wordless dread crept through her.
‘It’s—it’s just bad dreams, Lori…they vanish in the light of the sun.’
‘That’s what I tell him too,’ Adela said softly.
‘It is not bad dreams. Something has been watching our every move. I see them all the time, but she doesn’t believe me.’
‘What is it that you see, Lori?’
He shook his head and hid his face in his hands. She pulled him closer, protectively. He was as old as her, and yet he still felt so slight and vulnerable in her arms. Like a boy.