21. Margo
TWENTY-ONE
MARGO
“What are you doing tonight?” Katarina asks me over the phone. “Something fun, I hope. Christmas is like, two days away, and you shouldn’t be home alone during the holidays.”
“I’m hanging out with Finn. We’re making cookies at my place,” I tell her. “And I think he’s making me dinner? Maybe he’s bringing me dinner. He wasn’t totally clear.”
“You’re spending a lot of time with him. How is it going?”
“Good. We’re having fun.”
“Mhm. And by having fun you mean hanging out every night and smiling ear to ear?”
“That’s exactly what I mean.” My phone buzzes and I pull it away to see a message from Finn. “I have to run, Kat. I think he’s here.”
“Text me if things get too awkward and you need me to bail you out. I might be eight states away and in my childhood bedroom, but I’ll break all the driving laws to kick his ass.”
“I appreciate your dedication to my safety, as always.” I laugh and wipe my hands on a dish towel. “I’ll keep you posted. Tell your mom I say hi and Merry Christmas.”
“Will do. Love you, Margo.”
“Love you, too, Kat.”
I toss my phone on the counter and hustle to the door. When I open it, I burst out laughing at Finn’s outfit.
He’s wearing a Santa sweater that has a fuzzy beard and a hat with a bell. His pants are covered in reindeer and he’s holding a plastic bag and a small box.
“Hey,” he says with a grin. “Sorry I’m a few minutes late. The Thai restaurant was busy tonight, and I had to wait a little longer than usual.”
“Wow.” I lean against the doorframe and grin. “I have you saved in my phone as Sweater Guy, and you’re really proving that name to be right.”
“You’re in mine as Reluctant Runner.”
“Ah. A match made in heaven.” I take the bag from him and stand on my toes. Before I can kiss his cheek, he’s turning his head and kissing my lips, ferocity behind the press of his mouth as if he didn’t see me yesterday. “Come on in.”
“Thanks.” He shrugs out of his coat and kicks off his boots. “It’s fucking freezing outside.”
“You ran in shorts and a t-shirt the other day. I thought you liked the cold.”
“I was moving my body, Margo. Waiting for takeaway to be ready while being stationary is basically hell.”
“Your huge-ass sweater didn’t keep you warm?” I tease, and he gives my ass a light smack. “Careful! I’m sore from the thorough fucking we did yesterday.”
“I’m sorry. Do you forgive me?”
“Only because you brought food. What did you order for dinner?”
“A little of everything,” he says, and we walk down the hall to the kitchen. “I can’t believe you’ve never tried this place before. Their red curry is to die for.”
“I don’t want to die.” I unload the bag of food on the table in the corner and point at the plates I set out. “Could you bring those over? And speaking of dying, how was work?”
“That was a morbid transition.” Finn scoops up the plates and puts them next to the cartons of food. “It was fine. Busy, but fine. Sorry I answered your text so late. We had a couple of emergencies we had to work through and?—”
“Hey.” I lace my fingers through his and squeeze his hand. “You don’t have to apologize for being busy. You were at work. Not purposely avoiding me.”
“I’d never purposely avoid you.” With a tap on my hip, he sits down and rests the box he’s been carrying in his lap. “Did you have a good day?”
“I did. I worked on some lesson plans for next semester and looked at the curriculum for the biology class at the local high school.” I shrug and open a carton of white rice. “I think I might apply to a few positions over the summer. Why not?”
“Holy shit. That’s amazing, Margo.” He beams at me. “I’m so proud of you.”
His words light me up, and I can’t help but smile back. Those feelings I’ve been having for Finn seem to manifest and hit me square in the chest when he holds my gaze, and I know I’m attracted to him.
I know I have a crush on him, and I want to find a way to keep him around after the holidays.
I want to see him in the spring when the weather turns nice and the snow melts, and that is a terrifying thought I’m not sure how to voice.
“Thank you,” I say, embarrassed but grateful for his admiration. “I figured, why not?”
“Why not is right.” He adds some spring rolls to his plate and takes a bite of his food. “You know we’re watching a Christmas movie tonight after we make cookies, right?”
“I figured we would after we didn’t get to it the other night. Which one did you pick?”
“ Die Hard .”
“You’re joking. That’s not a Christmas movie.”
“Debatable, but I am joking. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation is the obvious choice because it’s a goddamn classic.”
“That’s the one where the kid licks the lamp post, right?” I ask, and he looks at me, horrified. “I’m kidding.”
“You almost gave me a damn heart attack.”
“We wouldn’t want that.” I lift my chin to the box on his lap. “What’s that?”
He sets the package on the table and nudges it my way. “I got you a present.”
“What? I didn’t get you anything.”
“I don’t need anything. It’s nothing special, and it required some assistance from Katarina.”
“You recruited her?” I wipe my hands and pick up the box. I give it a small shake and frown at the rattling noise inside. “There’s nothing alive in here, is there?”
“Nope. But it is fairly fragile, so be careful.”
Intrigued, I peel back the tape and slowly unwrap the gift. When I get all the paper off, I crumple it into a ball and chuck it at his head. “You would be an expert gift wrapper.”
“Blame my mother. She used to teach a class around the holidays, and I was always her assistant.”
“She sounds lovely.”
Finn smiles. “She is. Go on and open it.”
I pop open the top of the box and stare at the gift inside. “What—is this?—”
“Your medal and bib from the half marathon? Yeah. It is. I wanted to frame them for you so you could remember your first race. Even if you never run another one, you have that , and it’s something you should be very proud of. The back of the medal is engraved with your time on it. I almost included the form you signed in the medical tent, but I decided to leave that out. Good memories only.”
How do I tell him the medical tent is one of my favorite memories? How do I tell him that meeting him that day was the best thing that’s happened to me all year?
My nose stings. I brush my thumb under my eye and sniff. “Finn. This is…” I shake my head, unable to voice how meaningful this gift is to me. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m crying. A guy has never gotten me a gift before, and this is incredibly thoughtful.”
“Hey.” He sets down his fork and stands. Lifting me in his arms, he switches our positions so he’s sitting in my chair and I’m in his lap. “I should be the one apologizing. I can’t believe no one’s gotten you a gift, and I’m honored to be the first.”
“When did you even take this? You’ve been here one time, and the pockets in your running shorts are way too small to shove this inside.”
“Katarina stole it for me when she was hanging out with you a few days ago. I got it engraved yesterday and wrapped it up before I headed over.”
“Wow.” I run my fingers down the edges of the glass frame. “I never thought I’d have a medal like this, and now I can show it off. Where should I put it?”
“Up to you.” Finn smiles. “It’s your accomplishment, Margo. Celebrate it however you see fit.”
“In the living room.” I jump out of his lap and hurry around the corner. I set the frame on top of the electric fireplace and admire the shrine. “That’s perfect.”
“I like it,” he says from behind me, and I’m not surprised he followed me. “It looks great.”
“Seriously.” I turn to face him and tug on his sweater. “Thank you. This might be the best thing I’ve ever gotten.”
“My pleasure.” He cups my cheeks and cradles my face in his palms. “You have been the most unexpected surprise, Margo Andrews.”
When Finn kisses me, I feel it everywhere.
It takes up residence in every part of my body, and it’s a joy, a warmth I want to feel again and again.
It’s soft and sweet. Like we’re two lovers who have spent a lifetime together, and I put my whole soul into the press of my mouth.
I wrap my arms around his neck and run my fingers through his hair, close to him but still feeling like we’re too far away. My toes curl and my heart hammers in my chest.
I know I need to talk to him about what I’m thinking and feeling. It’s only fair, and I don’t want to get too caught up in a thing that has an ending or results in us walking away down different paths, because I know I would regret letting him go.
His hand roams down my body and slips under my shirt. His fingers fan out across my stomach and his thumb strokes my skin. I want him so badly.
Tonight.
Tomorrow.
The day after that.
“This might be my favorite Christmas ever,” I say against his mouth.
“Touching me in my office while I talked to my son, who had no idea you were on your knees under the desk, really amped up the holiday cheer, didn’t it?” He bites my bottom lip and dips his hand under the waistband of my sweatpants. I like that I don’t have to dress up for him. “I knew you enjoyed that.”
“I did enjoy it.” I gasp when his touch teases across the front of my underwear. “But I meant meeting you. Then meeting you again. All of it. This has been a whirlwind, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Me neither.” Finn drops his hands and sighs. “We’re putting a pause on this until we finish dinner. You’ve been doing a lot of running and need your calories. Especially if you’re going to burn more when I fuck you later.”
“Oh, is that what’s going to happen?” I ask.
“There has to be a joke in there about being a ho-ho-hoe.”
“Wow.” I grin and take his hand in mine. “That was the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”
“Maybe.” He kisses my forehead and I sigh. “But you like it.”
“Yeah,” I whisper, clutching his shirt like my life depends on it. “I do.”