24. Finn
TWENTY-FOUR
FINN
I wake up on Christmas morning with Margo wrapped around me. I look down and smile at her messy hair and the marks I left on her neck last night.
I don’t need any presents under the tree.
She’s the best thing I could’ve asked for.
I run my hand down her arm and lean forward to drop a kiss to her forehead. She stirs and her eyes flutter open, looking up at me with a sleepy grin.
“Hey. What time is it?”
“Eight. Merry Christmas, Margo.”
“Merry Christmas,” she says around a yawn, stretching her arms above her head. “Why are you up so early? Please don’t tell me you’re coming back from a run.”
“No running today. I just woke up. Sleeping in is nice.” I play with the ends of her hair and tug on the sheet so I can see her tits. “So are those.”
“This is sleeping in for you? You are such a weirdo.” Margo buries her face in my bare chest, and I grin. “You’re heading to your ex’s house later, right? Probably with another sweater, I’m guessing.”
“Yup. Dinner over there. I’m going to get the oven going for the turkey, but you should stay in bed.”
“That’s okay. I’ll get out of your hair so you can get going with your day.” She yawns again and throws the covers back. “I’ll take an Uber home.”
“Stay,” I tell her before I can think twice. “You should come to dinner.”
Margo blinks at me. “You’re kidding, right? You want me to go to dinner at your ex’s house where my ex, who is your child, will also be? That sounds like a fucked up soap opera.”
“We don’t have to tell anyone we’re sleeping together.”
“Pretty sure that’s going to be the automatic assumption, Finn, given I’m a decade and a half younger than you.” She stands and grabs one of my T-shirts to throw on. “I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
I scrub a hand over my face. This conversation isn’t going how I’d hoped, and the last thing I want to do is push her away or make her feel weird. “Can you come sit with me for a second?”
She eyes me warily and sits on the edge of the mattress. Her knee presses into mine, and I rest a hand on her thigh. “What’s going on?”
“Look, Margo. I’ve had a lot of fun with you the last… however many days it’s been.”
I can’t tell if time is flying by or inching forward. Every night with her passes in a second. Every hour I’m away from her drags like a month. I’ve never felt this way before, and I’ve never wanted to own a time machine more so I can keep going back and redoing all the minutes I get to spend with her.
“The sex is incredible, isn’t it?” she asks.
“It is, but I meant I’ve had fun doing everything else with you. The museum. Meeting Katarina. Making cookies. I know it’s only been two weeks, tops, but I like you. I think you’re funny and kind and hot as hell, and I don’t…” I drum my fingers on her leg. “I don’t want to stop seeing you. I want to keep spending time with you.”
Margo sucks in a sharp breath. “You do?”
“I do. And I know it might be complicated because of my son, and I want to respect your boundaries, but I also don’t want him to be the reason I don’t get to see you anymore.”
“What…” She swallows, and I track the bob of her throat. “Are you talking about dating? Exclusive fuck buddies?”
“I don’t know what label it should be, just that I want to be with you and only you. I want—” I laugh and shake my head. “This is so stupid. I want to kiss you on New Year’s Eve and I want to wake up with you on New Year’s Day. I want to celebrate your birthday and Valentine’s Day. Arbor Day, too.”
“You don’t even know when my birthday is,” Margo whispers.
“No. But I want to learn it. I want to learn everything about you.”
“That might be the most romantic thing anyone’s ever said to me.” She touches my jaw and drags her nails over the stubble I’m growing out. “Can I tell you a secret?”
“You can tell me anything.”
“I’m scared by how much I like hanging out with you,” she whispers. “I’ve been afraid to admit it to myself, but the more time we spend together, the more I think this could be… something . And I’m not just saying that because you’re the first person to give me attention since my breakup. I’m just fine being independent and on my own.”
“That doesn’t surprise me at all.”
“I’m saying it because you’re nice and thoughtful and probably the best man I’ve ever met.” Her laugh is shaky, and I want to pull her close. I want to give her the fucking sun and every star in the sky. “I’m just… I’m worried we’re at different points in our lives. We can’t deny the age difference between us. What if in two or three years you want to settle down with someone more mature? Someone who has more life experience and knows the difference between a Roth and a Traditional IRA.”
“I’m not sure even I know the difference.”
“You know what I mean,” she says.
“Who’s to say you won’t want to settle down with someone younger who isn’t going gray?” I challenge. “Hell. We might get in a car accident tomorrow and not have two or three years together.”
“Nothing says Happy Holidays like another morbid discussion of death.”
“I’m serious.” I pinch her thigh, and she grabs my hand. I link our fingers together and sigh. “I like you, Margo. I think about you when you’re not with me. I miss you when you’re gone. I want to keep getting to know you.”
“This is the most mature conversation I’ve ever had with a man, and I want to make sure I answer appropriately,” Margo says, and I grin.
“Sorry. Should I have sent a ‘u up?’ text instead?” I ask, and she tackles me onto the mattress.
“You make me laugh. You make me happy. I want those things with you too, Finn, but I need you to go slow with me. I want to do this right. You have far more relationship experience than I do, but I want to learn. I want to learn with you .”
“We can go as slow as you need. Label. No label. I don’t care. Which means you should not feel any pressure to come to dinner this afternoon. We don’t need any sort of trial by fire.”
“No.” She shakes her head. “I want to go. Let’s do it.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah. I mean, who knows what’s going to happen down the road, but for right now, I want to be a part of your life, Finn. And your life includes Jeremy. I told you I wasn’t in love with the guy, and that’s the truth. I can get through a holiday dinner with him.” Margo pins me with a look, and her grin is mischievous. “But you have to be the one to tell him about us.”
“Even if I don’t tell him, he could probably figure it out. The hickey I gave you last night leaves very little to the imagination.”
“My whole body is covered in marks from you. And my ass is sore as hell.”
“Is it?” I reach to her back and rub her ass cheek. “Shit. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize. It’s a good kind of sore. As in, we should do that again. Immediately. Very soon.”
I laugh and give her a light smack. “Let’s get through Christmas with my family first. I don’t want you walking funny because you’re wearing a butt plug around my best friends.” I hum, and my grin matches hers. “On second thought, that might be fun.”
“Feels like we need to graduate to two fingers before a butt plug, Finn. Seems like the logical progression of anal play.” She pats my chest and rolls off of me. I turn my head to look at her, and I’m struck with how fucking gorgeous she is.
Even with her messy hair. Even with sleep in her eyes. Even with chapped lips and my shirt on inside out, the wind gets knocked out of me at the sight of her.
“What’s wrong?” Margo asks. She touches her face and frowns. “I have makeup under my eyes, don’t I? I bet I look like a sleep deprived raccoon who keeps getting railed by the hot older guy so she can’t catch up on not being exhausted.”
“Railing a raccoon isn’t on my holiday to-do list, but you don’t look like that at all. You look stunning.”
“Stop it.”
“I’m serious.” I grab her wrist and stop her from covering her face. “Best way to wake up on Christmas morning.”
She rests her forehead against mine and kisses me. “Are you going to keep talking to me like that a month from now?”
“Yup. Six months from now, too.”
“Well. I guess I should get up and get ready so I can help with the turkey. I can’t show up to our first event together empty-handed.”
“First event together, huh?” I grin. “I like the sound of that, Miss Andrews.”
“Go put on your Christmas sweater. And let me borrow one so I don’t look like a total Grinch.”
“Don’t worry. I’ll give you the merriest one in my drawer.”