21. Deacon
“I fucked up, Squeak, but I promise this will be the last time until a nigga forgets our fiftieth anniversary and shit.”
“Fiftieth anniversary? You’re reaching.” Squeak laughs heartily, and the warmth I’ve been lacking in her absence coats my body like a swaddled newborn.
“Nah. While I have been a foolish and misguided nigga, the love I have for you has only grown in size. I’m gonna marry your pretty ass, Squeak. That’s a promise you can collect interest on in the future.”
Silence bounces around the room, and I bask in it while tightening the grip I have on Squeak’s nude body. Squeak’s steady heartbeat against my chest is the comfort I’ve been missing. The storm swirling around me is beginning to calm the longer Squeak’s body lies on top of me. Desperate for a more intimate connection after our multiple makeup sessions, I held her tight when she tried to lay beside me after our last session.
“Why did you treat me like I meant nothing to you, Deacon?” The low and fragility in Squeak’s voice confirms that I have a ways to go with repairing the damage I caused between us.
Sighing heavily, I kiss Squeak’s forehead and forge ahead with the conversation necessary to repair the fabric of our tattered relationship. Heaviness rests on my shoulders because I have never been comfortable letting her go, yet I didn’t override the loyalty I had to my brothers.
“I’m sorry for showing you the opposite of what I said. I will never forgive myself for damaging the moment we had. To be honest, before you, I have never had someone to make me challenge my actions concerning my club duties.”
“I don’t understand because for as easy as you said you loved me… love didn’t keep you in bed with me. Love didn’t have your ass running to rescue me. Love didn’t protect me from the man who intends to kill me. Your love, or lack thereof, left me vulnerable and staring into the eyes of the Boogeyman.”
My eyes draw together, and my brows hike from the last statement Squeak said, making me lift her head to stare into her weary brown orbs.
“What did you say?”
Squeak’s eyes become watery, and my chest tightens at the pain shining through, causing wrinkles on my forehead.
“I went to a thing at one of my co-worker's house and ran into my boogeyman. Only God kept you from seeing my picture on the news.”
Fuck!
Multiple emotions fight for dominance as I watch Squeak intently before settling on the ones I feel the most at this moment… rage and guilt. Staring into Squeak’s eyes, I recognize the misery from that night is still haunting her, and the weight of my absence settles heavily within my extremities.
“Who the fuck is he, Squeak?” My question comes out harsh and raw due to the sudden urge to avenge Squeak after leaving her wide open.
I want to kick my own ass, and I will after I’ve taken care of the man who I stupidly gave permission to breathe Squeak’s air.
“H-h-he’s in a motorcycle club, according to his vest.”
My hold on Squeak’s body unconsciously becomes tighter when my body heat elevates faster than an erupting volcano. A deep grimace falls into place before the statement slams into my mind a second time.
“Which club?” I ask.
“Sa-satan’s Cobras,” Squeak whispers like she’s afraid of someone overhearing her, and pounding in my ears collides with my elevating pulse.
My temple vein strains against my skin, my mouth dries from my rushed breathing, and murderous thoughts begin invading my mind.
I’m killing all those mothafuckas. Ignoring their bullshit is over. If I have to start picking off their family members to get to them… every member of Satan’s Cobras is on borrowed time. Fucking with Squeak is punishable by d ? —
“Another weird thing is one of the men interacting with Boogeyman sounded familiar. I don’t know where I’ve heard his voice, but I think I know him.”
Squeak’s new information cuts off my internal rant and decree, forcing me to focus on what she’s saying.
“What does the nigga look like?” I ask with flaring nostrils and ice running through my veins.
“Boogeyman was blocking me, so I didn’t see the man’s face. I only heard him.”
“All right. Why were you there again?”
“My co-worker invited me to hang out with him and his wife because he said he was tired of seeing the look my punk ass man had given me.” A small smile upturns Squeak's lips for the first time since sharing this information.
While I can appreciate Squeak’s attempt at changing the chill in the air, I can’t join in the olive branch she’s extending. These niggas got me fucked up, and that’s anything but a laughing matter for me.
“Did the nigga set you up to be ambushed?” Something about this entire conversation doesn’t feel right to me, and I have to know if I need to add her bitch ass co-worker to the list of murder victims.
“I don’t think so, but I didn’t stick around after Boogeyman was called away to chat with someone wanting to join his club. Honestly, this is my first time outside since that night. I took a leave of absence and gave up my apartment to prevent my parents from making funeral arrangements for their only child.”
“How many books in the Bible are there?”
It’s time to change the subject before I fuck around and leave Squeak in another post-coital state my ass will have to kiss more than her feet to repair. Nevertheless, I’ve got multiple niggas to sing a lullaby, and Squeak will never fall victim to their bad juju. Hell hath no fury like a nigga repairing the scorn he’s caused his lady.
The next day…
“I cover her with Your protection, God. Let not a single ounce of my karma hit her life from being tied to me. I ask that You would send angels to watch over her. Finally, I ask that You would turn your head long enough for me to darken the doorsteps of every nigga who believes in causing her fear. When I do my duty as her man… I beg for Your forgiveness. In Jesus?—”
“What are you—why is my forehead oily, Deacon?” Squeak asks, opening her eyes while touching her forehead after backing away from my hand covering her head.
“It ain’t nothing but some anointing oil. Ma said I had to keep it in the crib. You interrupted my prayer, and I was about to seal it. Now I gotta start over,” I say, frowning.
“Nigga, you were praying to who for who? I have enough problems right now. Please don’t piss off the King of Kings when in Him I need to live, move, and have my being.” Squeak’s expression of outrage has a low chuckle leaving my mouth.
Damn, I love her ass.
“It’s like that, Squeak? Deac and Deaconess Redmond would have Pastor Reece joining them in a prayer service where I’m laid out on the altar while they rid me of my demons. Don’t worry. Me and God have an understanding.”
“Who’s your payee, Deacon?” Squeak stares intently at me, unblinking, and a smirk upturns my lips.
“What are you talking about, woman? You’re the only recipient of?—”
“The hell I am. Nope, it’s too early for this shit.” Throwing the blankets off her body, Squeak exits my bed, stomping toward the bathroom, mumbling about how God doesn’t play fair.
A full-body laugh escapes my mouth because I can almost see smoke coming from Squeak’s ears. Grabbing my phone from the nightstand, I dial a number and wait for the call to connect.
“Good morning, Prynce.”
“I think your anointing oil expired, Ma.”
“Exp—what are you talking about, honey?” Ma asks.
“I tried praying over Squeak just now, and she flipped out instead of waiting for the benediction. I used the oil you left over here.”
Silence and ruffling from the other end of the line has me sitting on the bed, focusing on the bathroom. The goofy grin I’m wearing can’t be helped because Squeak is here with me, and all is right in my world again.
“I’m so proud of you, and I’m sure the evidence of your prayer will be the confusion from the enemy. Great job, Prynce,” Ma says cheerily.
Hm. Should I tell Ma it wasn’t the kind of prayer she recites to God or leave it alone?
“I really think I need to get right with God because if I’m gonna be with you… one of us has to be in right standing with God,” Squeak says, reentering the room with her eyes assessing me.
“I gotta go tend to my woman, Ma,” I say, smirking as my heart skips several beats while staring at Squeak wearing nothing but the suit God gave her after entering the world.
“Awe. I love seeing and hearing love from you, Prynce. God bless this union. Cover them, oh God. Bless them. Hold back the hand of the enemy. Lord, block and cancel every plan of Satan concerning them. I trust You, God. I believe You, God. I worship You, God. I call Prynce and Ms. Janelle blessed,” Ma says, and with my eyes watching Squeak’s every move toward me, I remain silent and let her finish her petition for me and my woman.
“Why are you staring at me like this, Deacon?” Squeak asks.
“Along with categorizing every spot, mole, and every feature on your pretty face, I’m trying to patiently wait for you to reach me so I can fuck you back to sleep,” I say huskily.
“Prynce Michael Redmond… why are you acting mannish knowing I’m on this phone?” Ma yells into the receiver, causing me to disconnect the call without answering because, somehow, I had forgotten she was on the line the longer my gaze connected with Squeak.
“You ain’t got no chill, Deacon. Your momma is gonna get you,” Squeak says, laughing.
Pulling her body into mine, I fall back onto the bed, kissing her lips lightly, and pure joy spreads through my body upon seeing desire pooling in Squeak’s orbs.
“Worry more about this dick I’m about to give you and less about Ma. She’ll be all right. Your pussy, on the other hand… Never mind. Guide me home, love.”