Chapter 20 Natasha
NATASHA
Grave puffed air into the microphone. “Testing, one. Natasha, can you hear me?”
I sighed. “Loud and clear.”
“We got you on this end, too. Mic check.”
“Rock.”
“Knox.”
“Brewer.”
“Bear.”
“Saint.”
“Cage.”
“Ryker.”
“I hate this fucking hat.”
I grinned. “Hey there, Toxin.”
Grave sighed. “Seriously? All you had to do was say your name.”
“Do I really have to wear this hat?” Toxin asked.
I giggled. “That’s the deal. If you want to be in the club, you have to cover your face. Lars has cameras everywhere in his places. If they spot you, we’re done for.”
“She’s right. So, shut up about the hat,” Grave said.
“I mean, it is a shitty hat. But that’s beside the point,” I said.
Toxin murmured. “Told you.”
The guys chuckled in my ear and it made me grin.
I looked over at Cage, who was driving us to the strip club.
Well, a few blocks away from the strip club.
From there, I had to get out and walk. Can’t roll up in a car with these guys.
He looked nervous. Angry and nervous. He white-knuckled the steering wheel as we headed through town, trying to keep our wits about us.
Toxin tried getting me to take a nap this afternoon after we got back from my place. But I couldn't sleep. I was too worried. Too anxious.
Thank fuck, I brought my bubble bath stuff from my apartment.
“All right. You remember the plan, Natasha?” Grave asked.
I nodded. “I do, yep. Toxin’s going to be in a club with a stupid hat on to keep an eye on Ivan while I do my job. I go in, do as Phillip asks, and while the regular inner workings of the club have everyone occupied, you guys are gonna scout out for where Diesel might be.”
“If he’s there,” Cage murmured.
“You can keep your shit to yourself. I don’t know what the hell’s gotten up your ass, but you need to can it,” Brewer hissed.
“Enough,” Grave said.
I reached over and patted Cage’s knee. I knew what had gotten into him.
He felt responsible. I felt responsible for all the shit the crew had gone through on his behalf.
I’d had a massive heart to heart talk with Sutton today.
She told me all about her growing up. About her father.
About how she met Cage and how they fell in love.
She told me about the first moment she realized her father was a maniac.
Much like the first time I realized Ivan was nothing but a pathetic loser who enjoyed manipulating and beating on women.
I understood how Cage felt. Feeling responsible for the hell this crew was going through.
And I wanted him to know he was all right.
“Okay, guys. Let’s all take a breath and settle down,” I said.
“I’ll be better once we have Diesel,” Ryker said.
“And I’ll be better once Lars is finally off our backs,” Cage said.
“Here, here,” the guys said in unison.
“Now remember, Toxin, you cannot engage Natasha once she gets on stage,” Grave said.
“She’s not making it to the stage, remember?” he asked.
“But if I do, you can’t engage me. Ivan is going to set his sights on you if you do. And he won’t hesitate to kill you on the spot,” I said.
“I take it that’s happened before?” Knox asked.
I cleared my throat. “Maybe.”
“Fucking lunatic,” Saint murmured.
“Can I be the one to kill him?” Bear asked.
“No. That’s my job, and you guys know it,” Toxin said.
My heart warmed at their words. How protective they were of me already. I figured it wouldn't last. After this operation was done, they’d have no more use for me. But for the time being, I imagined what it might be like to be part of their family. To be one of them.
And it made me smile.
“We’re here,” Cage said.
He pulled the car over and parked it.
“You ready?” he asked, looking over in my direction.
I nodded. “Ready as I’ll ever be.”
“Remember, don’t talk to us unless you absolutely have to. These earpieces aren’t located with regular strip wands people might wave around on you before you get in. Keep your cool, and we should be good to go,” Grave said.
“Should?” I asked.
“There are no guarantees. But I’m in here, Natasha. Get in here, and I’ve got eyes on you. Always,” Toxin said.
And though it should’ve creeped me out, it didn’t. It made me feel safe and gave me the confidence to step out of the car.
“Let’s get the show on the road,” I said.
I kept my eyes peeled as Cage drove away from me. Turning down back alleys to get out of sight as quickly as possible. I wrapped a massive fur coat around my body, clicking away in my heels. And as the streets grew darker, the smell of glitter and whiskey filled my nostrils.
Almost there.
When the lights of the strip club emerged, I sighed.
But not with relief. The security guards eyed me and immediately started talking into their cufflinks.
Not subtle at all. The doors opened and they were held for me as I walked through.
Making my grand entrance after the massive shoot-out a few days ago.
Holy shit, that had only been a few days ago.
“You got eyes on her yet, Toxin?” Grave asked.
“Not yet,” he murmured.
“Give it five minutes, then go find her,” Brewer said.
“Natasha,” Phillip said.
I turned toward the voice and gave him a scowl.
I certainly wasn’t going to try and kiss the man’s ass.
That would fly more red flags than ever.
He held his hand out to escort me backstage.
Probably where the rest of the girls were dressing and getting ready for their performances.
The smokiness of the room alleviated the further we walked down the hallway.
Doors closed behind us, cutting off the light source before a door opened to my right.
“In here,” Phillip said.
“Is Ivan here?” I asked.
I stopped just shy of the door and looked up at him.
“Yes. He’s here,” Phillip said.
“Waiting for me, I assume. You know, before he beats on me a while after buying the rest of my time for the night,” I said.
“What he does with the time he may or may not want with you is none of my concern. My only concern is getting you on that stage for the time you’re slotted to dance.”
“And when was this going to be discussed with me?”
“Before you decided to take off with some maniac trying to kill us. Especially after all we’ve done for you.”
“Done for me? You led me right back to my ex, you sly rat bastard.”
“Easy, Natasha. Take some breaths,” Toxin said.
I drew in a deep breath as a grin spread across Phillip’s face.
“You have a locker in here with your name on it. Change, get ready, and I’ll come find you when it’s your time to hit the stage,” he said.
“Yeah. Whatever, traitor,” I murmured.
“You’re lucky you’re not dead for that exact title,” he said.
And as he closed the door behind me, my heart skipped a beat.
I heaved a heavy sigh as I looked around the room. Dimly lit vanities held the slumped shoulders of girls with one too many bruises on their bodies. It made me sick to look at. They moved so mechanically, putting on their makeup and trying to illuminate their dead eyes.
None of them wanted to be here.
“Natasha? Your breathing’s ticked up,” Grave said.
“You guys were forced here, too. Weren’t you?” I asked.
“Shit,” Bear hissed.
“How many girls?” Ryker asked.
“All six of you?” I asked.
“Okay. Six plus Natasha is seven girls we need to get out of there,” Saint said.
“Our priority is Diesel. And if we can get him out safely, then yes. We find the girls and take them with us, too. Get them back home,” Grave said.
The girls slowly turned their eyes to me, and my heart broke for them.
Some of them had been starved. Others pumped with food to fatten them up for the men who enjoyed curvier women.
They all looked hollow inside. Their makeup practically painted on.
I moved toward the lockers and found the one with my name on it.
I hesitated before I opened it up, scared of what I might find.
And when I saw what was inside, I heaved.
“What is it?” Toxin asked.
“What’s going on?” Brewer asked,
“Natasha, talk to us,” Knox said.
I stared at the first set of lingerie Ivan ever bought me. A pearly-white set he forced me to put on for him one night. I’d been sick with the flu. In bed for days. Yet, he yanked me out of bed, made me take a shower, and had me put it on for him.
Just before I puked all over it.
“Natasha. Say something. Now,” Toxin demanded.
“I can’t do this,” I whispered.
“You have to. Only a few more minutes, okay?” Grave asked.
I reached my trembling fingers for the set as my lower lip quivered.
“I can’t do this. I-I-I—I can’t go out in—”
“Hey, it’s all right. All first nights are hard.”
I turned my head at the sound of the girl’s voice, gazing into her dead blue eyes. She tried comforting me, but her face was muted. It was the weirdest thing I’d ever seen. Like I had somehow stepped into a twilight zone where everyone’s bodies were inhabited by aliens.
Or some shit like that.
“We have to get her out of there,” Toxin said.
“Settle down or I’ll remove you and replace you with someone else,” Grave said.
“I can go in his place if it makes anyone feel better,” Cage said.
I sniffled as the girl took the lingerie from my hands.
“This means something, doesn’t it?” the girl asked.
I paused. “What’s your name?”
“Diamond. You?”
“No, your actual name.”
She shrugged. “Does it matter?”
“To me, it does,” I said.
She sighed. “Mariel.”
“Yes, Mariel. This does mean something. This is the exact lingerie set my abusive ex ever bought me. And he’s out there tonight, ready to tango. Ready to watch me put this on just for him. How the hell am I supposed to do that, huh? How am I supposed to go out in this?”
“You won’t hit that damn stage, you hear me?” Toxin asked.
“Wait, personal lingerie? He kept that shit?” Knox asked.
“I threw up, all over this, Mariel. It was ruined. And it was the first true beating I ever got from him. It was a lesson in learning how to appreciate the stuff he got me. I had the flu for four days, Mariel. Four days. And he ripped me out of bed and made me put this on. How the fuck does anyone expect me to go out in this?” I asked.
“Fucking hell, this is bullshit. I’m done,” Toxin growled.
“Sit down or you’re done with this operation. And stop talking so fucking much. People will think you’re talking to yourself and throw you out,” Brewer hissed.
Mariel cupped my cheek. “All of our first outfits have a story. It’s… their trademark. Their way of showing us that they own us.”
“Well, they don’t own me,” I glowered.
“Natasha?” Phillip asked.
I whipped my eyes up to meet his.
“What the fuck do you want?” I asked.
He grinned. “You’re on in ten. I suggest you get into your outfit unless you want a personal meeting with Ivan and Lars.”
And as he closed the door, it took all I had not to vomit on that fucking lingerie set.
Again.