22. Chapter Twenty-Two
22
Luca
Sliding behind the wheel of my car was like slipping into a familiar pair of jeans. The seat was molded to my ass, the wheel fit perfectly in my hands. I didn't realize until that moment how much I'd missed driving. I'd missed being in control. There was still so much I had no control over, but when you're this close to the edge, sometimes you just have to hold your breath, clench your fists, and jump feet first. That's the only kind of control people like me can afford.
The bulletproof vest I'd strapped on lent a familiar constriction to my chest, or maybe it was just the tightness that had wrapped itself around my heart since I'd left that letter for Sofia behind. It was a shitty way to say goodbye. I knew that. Hell, I could practically hear Dante's voice in my head, telling me what an asshole thing it was to do. He'd never forgive me for it, and I couldn't blame him.
But it was the only way I could think of to make sure that she'd stay safe and away from the Compound. She'd stop me if she knew. Or worse, she'd try to help, and that was one thing I wouldn't allow. I was doing this for her. For us. To give them a chance at a future that was free of all this shit. Free of Sal, and his bullshit, and his fucking rules. A future that was free of the Moretti's and their goddamn vendettas.
Only, it was going to be a future I wouldn't be there to see.
Fingering the 40's strapped beneath my jacket, I shifted the car into drive and backed out of the parking garage feeling like the lowest piece of shit around. God, Sofia. Dante was right. This was going to hurt her, but I didn't know any way around it. I'd been a dead man walking for weeks now. The least I could do was take out a few assholes on my way out.
I hope you can forgive me, sweetheart. Forgive me and move on.
I drove down the street, cutting across the old, familiar route. The compound was up ahead, its lights blazing in the night like some kind of leviathan from a bygone era. A fucking neon sign that said, 'come and get me, I'm ready for you'.
I wasn't sure what was going to happen when I walked through those doors, but I knew one thing for certain: Sal and Dominic were going down tonight. I wasn't going to let them take me without a struggle. And I sure as hell wasn't going to go quietly.
I pulled into the back lot and drove around to the tradesman's entrance at the rear of the compound. I knew it would be unlocked, and I also knew that there wouldn't be any guards posted back there. Sal was too arrogant for that. He thought no one would dare attack him on his own turf. But he was wrong. And he was about to find out just how wrong he was.
I got out of my car and walked up to the door, my heart pounding in my chest. The vest suddenly seemed constricting, reminding me of another night I'd snuck in through the back door of this place. The night I had sneaked Irish kingpin Connor McTiernan into the Compound to rescue his wife who had been abducted by Lorenzo. The first of my many betrayals.
It was also the night I realized that Emilia would never love me the way I thought I had loved her.
Touching the deep grooves around my left temple and cheekbone, I realized that it was just one of the many things I'd done for her out of a misplaced sense of unrequited love. That night, as I watched her walk away holding the hand of that Irishman, I thought I was watching my heart walk away with her. I thought I'd lost her forever.
But I was wrong. Sofia had been there all along, waiting for me. What had merely been a flame for Emilia was a full-blown inferno for Sofia. And it was that inferno that was going to carry me through tonight. It was that inferno that was going to help me do what needed to be done.
I loved Sofia with all of my heart. My soul. But I couldn't keep her.
Instead, I would make sure that she had a future. I would make sure that she was happy. Even if I wasn't around to see it. Even if it meant that I had to give up the one thing in this world that meant everything to me. Because I loved her enough to let her go. I loved her enough to give her the life she deserved. The life she wanted. I wasn't going to stand in her way, and I wasn't going to let Sal or Dominic take that away from her.
I pushed open the door and slipped inside, the familiar smells of cigarette smoke and stale beer hitting me like a brick wall, a smell I would always associate with this place and the crazy shit that went down within these walls. I walked through the kitchen, my footsteps silent on the tile floor, and into the hallway that led to the bar area. From there, it was a short walk to the stairs that led to the second floor and Sal's office. But as I was nearing the bottom of the staircase, I heard voices. Shit.
Ducking behind a corner, I peered around it to see who was standing there. Two of Sal's men, leaning against the wall and chatting casually. They were both smoking, their guns holstered but still visible beneath their suit jackets. I cursed silently. They were in my way, and they weren't going anywhere anytime soon. I could try to take them out, but it would be noisy, and I didn't want to alert Sal that I was here.
Around to the south side of the foyer. I glanced down the hall in the other direction, and I could see the door that led to that back staircase. It was my only chance. If I could just make it there without being seen...
Taking a deep breath, I stepped out from behind the corner and walked down the hall, my footsteps as quiet as I could make them. The men didn't even look up as I passed, too engrossed in their own conversation to notice me. But I knew that could change at any moment. I had to hurry.
I made it to the door and slipped through it, closing it softly behind me. The stairwell was dark, but there was enough light filtering in through the small window at the top of the stairs so that I could see where I was going. Taking the stairs two at a time, I climbed quickly, pulse thumping.
When I reached the top, I paused to catch my breath. A wave of vertigo hit me, and I stumbled, nearly blacking out. Shit. This wasn't the time for one of my headaches. Not now, not when I was so close. Taking a deep breath, I forced myself to keep going.
I opened the door at the top of the stairs and peeked out. The hallway was empty. Thank fuck. But it wouldn't be for long. Sal's office was at the other end of the hall, but they usually left him alone this time of night. If I could just make it down there, we wouldn’t be disturbed.
But that was a big if.
I crept down the hall, keeping my back pressed against the wall. I could hear voices coming from the rooms I passed, men laughing and joking, but no one saw me. No one stopped me. When I reached Sal's office, I tried the knob. It turned easily in my hand. Sal was a creature of habit, and he always left his door unlocked when he was in there alone.
I pushed the door open and stepped inside, my hand going to the gun strapped under my jacket. Sal was behind his desk, his feet propped up on the surface, a cigar in his mouth. He was reading a document in his lap, but he looked up when he heard the door open, his eyes going wide when he saw me. He jumped to his feet, reaching for the gun on his desk, but I already had mine out and pointed at him.
"Hello, Sal."