Chapter 22 Cove #2
Nathaniel rolls his eyes and nods at Austin to continue. “As I was saying,” Austin sputters. “I look forward to not only partnering with you, Nathaniel, but having the honor of being your son-in-law someday.”
Please don’t say anything, Stet. Please. I beg of you.
“And, princess.” Austin pivots toward me, one hand reaching to caress the side of my face.
I really hope he can’t feel my trembling.
Not out of fear, but from horror and sadness.
I might as well place Stetson on a cross and crucify him with the level of torture this must be.
“I’m going to make you the queen of my castle.
Make love to you every night. And ensure you never go without.
I vow to give you the world. That’s a promise.
” And without warning, he brings his lips to mine.
Cheers turn Austin’s declaration into an anthem of praise, but I block it out. The only thing that triggers my sense of sound is the slamming of the door to the house, rattling the outside walls, and echoing against the thin barriers of my heart.
I have no time to be repulsed by the kiss. Or to search the eyes of Nathaniel in worry that he might be catching on to this thing between Stetson and me. At this point, all I know is that we’re just days in and I’m ready to wave the white flag.
This isn’t me. I’m not a person who hurts someone I care about. And I care about Stetson more than I ever realized. Avoiding him is as simple as finding a cure for cancer. It’s impossible. This is his ranch for Christ’s sake.
If only I had known we’d be coming here, I’d have found another way to help my mom. Maybe if I tell him the truth, he’ll understand?
“I…uh…I’ll be right back.” I shrug out of Austin’s jacket and move.
“Cove. Where are you going?” Nathaniel calls out, but I’m already halfway to the door Stetson stormed through. I need to find him. It’s time I be honest with him and hope he doesn’t hate me for it.
I run through the house, heels clacking against the wooden paneling as I call for him in anguish. “Stetson!” I’m not sure what I’m doing, but I know he deserves answers. That’s if he doesn’t already despise me enough to no longer care why I’m really here.
I search the halls of his home, finding them all empty. My mind is racing and my heart pounds. I have two options: go back to dinner or search outside for him.
Only the latter feels right.
Before I can talk myself out of it, I’m out the front door, careful not to let anyone hear me as I run down the steps and across the graveled driveway in search of Stetson. I’ve only seen portions of the ranch, so I’m not exactly sure where I’m headed, but I hope it’s in his direction.
“Stetson!” I shout in a whisper, searching through the oak trees and pastures behind the house. It’s tranquil out here. The cows appear to be snoozing in the night as I walk carefully beside a herd of them sleeping.
I’m seriously regretting wearing heels right now. The dirt beneath me causes my heels to sink, but like the bitch on a mission I am, I persevere. I’m accustomed to the sandy beaches of Miami. My college years were filled with beach parties in five-inch wedges.
So, in this case, a little dirt won’t hurt.
“Don’t you dare leave me out here for some animal to come eat me!” I screech, my head on a swivel with paranoia.
“Cove?” a deep voice echoes softly from behind me.
I turn to find Stetson seated on a hanging bench swing with his elbows on his knees, the same torment from earlier consuming his thoughts. I breathe a sigh of relief and make my way over to him. Although, I know this is just the beginning of an uproar.
“I’ve been looking for you.”
“I can’t be around you right now, Cove. I just can’t.” He shakes his head, and it feels like he’s trying to shake me. I wouldn’t blame him.
“I know. I’m sorry. I never meant for Austin to—”
“Don’t you dare say his fucking name around me right now,” he snaps. “Not when it’s just us.”
I’ve only ever known Stetson to be composed. Calm. He’s never fazed by anything—especially to this extent.
“Okay. Okay,” I rush out. “I’m sorry…I’m sorry,” I exhale.
He shakes his head. “Just tell me why. And I don’t mean some bullshit answer, Cove.
I want the real reason. Tell me why you’re here with him and not me.
Because I’ve been trying to wrap my head around it since you got here.
Trying to figure out what it is that he can give you that I can’t.
None of it makes sense. Not when I know what we had. ”
Had. I mask my own hurt at his words, knowing it’s nothing compared to how he feels.
I take a step forward, putting myself in front of him, but keep a respectable distance. His head lifts, and I almost crumble at the sight of his once-bright blue eyes now tinged with red, hurt evident behind them.
“Nothing is what it seems.”
“No shit, Cove. You think I don’t know that?
I’ve known it from the second I met eyes with you the night you arrived.
Your relationship with Nate. City boy. The fact that you’ve been a shell of the woman I’ve come to know.
This isn’t you,” he spits, and it’s not in fury.
I feel the pain in his words. His passion.
“I can explain everything to you, Stetson. I’ll explain everything.”
He huffs, shaking his head as his eyes meet the ground. “Seeing him kiss you about killed me. I was ten seconds away from flipping the table and strangling him by the neck.”
He would be doing me a favor.
“I understand.” I have so much to say, but it seems like Stetson has more. And I wouldn’t dare cut him off from sharing the words I know he already struggles to express. There’s anguish in his words.
“Nate is my best friend, and no matter how many times I tell myself it’s wrong of me to want his daughter, my fucking heart keeps steering me back to you.
I see you from across the ranch laughing with Abigail or find you sipping your morning coffee, and all I can think about is holding you.
Bringing you into my home and making a space for you.
But then my mind clears a path for the reality of us, and I’m reassured that misery undoubtedly loves company. ”
Please don’t say that. My heart cries in my chest. “I want that, too,” I cry softly, unable to contain it any longer. “I want that more than anything. No misery. Just me in your space.”
“Then tell me why because I’m losing my mind with want for you. Overwhelmed with a yearning I’ve never known. And I’m not sure I can spend another minute not kissing you, Cove. Eliminating that poor excuse of a man so that only you and I exist.”
“Stetson,” I whimper, my eyes falling closed. “Listen to me. Let me explain everything to you, okay?” I want to reach for him and beg him to let me comfort him. But he needs to hear my truth.
He sets his black cowboy hat to the side and runs his fingers through his hair. “I’m listening.”
I hold on to the lace fabric of my white eyelet dress for security and tell him everything, pouring my heart and soul into my words, desperately hoping he understands.
“As I’m sure you know, last year, Florida was hit by a category four hurricane.
Most of the state went without damage, but not Miami.
Not my home. My father, Nathaniel, wasn’t around throughout my childhood.
I know I told you that before, but what I didn’t mention was his absence by choice.
He never wanted me. Never wanted to be with my mom, either, so he took the easy way out.
The cowardly way. He left us when I was nine.
It devastated my mom and took her years to rebuild on her own without a dime from him.
The only thing she’s ever really had for herself is our home.
The house she bought on her own, without the help of Nathaniel.
And then the hurricane hit and brought nothing but disaster.
I’ve been battling with the homeowner’s insurance and contractors for months, trying to uncover all the issues and figure out how to get things fixed without Mom having to take out a second mortgage or loan.
She can’t afford it. The added interest. The stress of paying another lender.
She already works doubles around the clock with injuries that never fully healed themselves. ”
“I was out of options. The bills were piling up, and the final quote for restoring everything was much more than we thought. I had no other choice but to ask Nathaniel for help.”
Stetson’s voice stops me from continuing. Two words. “How much?”
I don’t hesitate. “Over one hundred thousand.”
“Exact amount, Cove.”
“One hundred twenty. And that’s if no other problems occur during restoration.”
He nods. “Keep going.”
“I hadn’t spoken to Nathaniel in twenty-one years and never planned to.
But I’d do it all over again if it meant helping my mom.
She sacrificed everything for me. It’s the least I could do.
What I didn’t know until years after he left was that Nathaniel left me a letter saying he had money set aside for me when I turned eighteen.
I wanted nothing to do with it. Until now.
I knew it was the only way I could help.
I make decent money flying, but not enough to support restoring an entire house. ”
“When was this?”
“Huh?”
“When did the stress of everything begin?” Stetson looks at me, and I can’t read what he’s thinking. Somehow, that worries me more.
“Oh. Around the time you crashed my double date with Betsy. I was meeting with our handyman and contractors to figure out costs moving forward.”
“And when you reached out to Nate?”
“Right before Chicago.” My voice shakes, and I know Stetson can connect the dots. Chicago was when I started pulling away. At least, I tried at first. I told myself I’d enjoy the weekend with him and reach back out once life was better.
I couldn’t be all in with him if I were going to be at the beck and call of my father. But fate seemed to have different plans.