Chapter 31 #2
Exiting the suite, I head for the balcony. Flying up to the next floor, I head towards my rooms. The guards nod at me. Irin opens my door. I walk inside, heading straight for the shower. I tug off my blood-stained tunic and step under the spray of magically heated water.
By the time I finish washing off all the grime, get dried, and dressed, Jace is waiting for me.
I stop in the doorway of the ensuite, staring at him, assessing the damage between us.
When he sits on the bed and smiles, I relax.
Slightly. The blood in my veins still seems to be crawling with restless energy.
With so much goddamn fury at a system that only wants to break the good and call it freedom.
All of our abhorrent laws are there to “make us strong”, to protect us from “being invaded by our enemies”.
But what can they fucking do that we haven’t already done to ourselves?
I was drafted into war as a child – as all of my generation was.
I had to kill my own sisters. I’m going to have to kill my own wife.
“Arienna doesn’t belong here,” I rasp, the words tight in my throat and chest. Being queen will break her.
How can it not when Aurelia wasn’t even strong enough to bear the crown?
She was a warrior princess, raised to be a queen since she was born.
Arienna is too innocent and good and weak.
Raza will destroy her just like it’s destroyed all of us.
“Death will be a mercy.” It is life as Raza’s queen that will be the worst torture.
“I can get a witch to numb her body before I execute her.”
“You can stop being an idiot who shuts out everyone in fear of losing them.”
“Like you have?” I snap, only to regret it instantly. “Shit. Sorry.”
His teal eyes darken, but he lets it slide. My sister is the only one he’ll ever love. “We’ll protect her,” he murmurs as if it’s that simple.
And I hate that. I hate it. Because if I manage to save her, then why the fuck couldn’t I save my sister? Why couldn’t we have protected her?
Seeing the pain in my eyes, the thoughts in my head, Jace stands, his own anger flaring out of control.
“Don’t do that,” he says lethally. “You do not get to do that.” His body is as relaxed as a viper knowing it can kill in a single strike, and I take a step back involuntarily – even though part of me wants him to do it. To punish me for what I did.
“She was mine to protect,” he growls, so much pain and fury in his words. “You do not get to fucking use her –” He cuts himself off. Looks away on a sharp exhale. “She would have wanted this, so you’re going to fix things with your wife.”
My throat tightens as his gaze flies back to mine.
The tension between us ripples taut. Becomes so damn close to breaking.
I take a step forward, the scar on my left hand burning.
He gave it to me that day when he pinned me to the ground and tried to kill me slowly.
He would have if my sister hadn’t stopped him. “I’m so–”
“Don’t.” He slashes at his leg with a small triangular blade I didn’t even realise he pulled free of its sheath.
As a crimson line fills the hole in his trousers, he stands.
He does not have to say another word; I can see the raw feralness in his eyes, the one that sits behind his smile every minute of the day.
If I talk about Aurelia any more, he will break.
Swallowing down my guilt, I nod. He shoves his usual smile back in place. A knock at the door has him going to answer it, his knife sheathed once more. The tension in the room dissipates as he cloaks it in his usual cheer.
He ushers in a man with two full carts of shrooms and a money-eyed smile lighting up his face. Fabia comes in after him, scowling and covered in sweat.
“You called?” she demands.
I glance at Jace as he shuts the door and joins us. Did I? He grins. The shroomist glances at Fabia in horror for being so bold.
Holding her gaze, I gesture to his carts, understanding what Jace wants from me – and damn him, I want it too. “What kind of shrooms does Arienna like?”
“What?”
“I think I was perfectly clear.”
She glances at Jace in irritation, then shakes her head. “The glowing purple ones.”
My eyes narrow as I scan the two carts before me. There are purple polka dotted ones and glowing green ones, but no glowing purple shrooms. “Did Jace not ask you to bring everything?” I demand, knowing he would’ve.
“I – I’ve never heard of any glowing purple ones, Your Highness,” the man says, his eyes wide.
“That’s because they don’t exist,” Jace cuts in with a chuckle. “Now that you’ve poked him, stop,” he tells Fabia. “Otherwise, you’re going to be responsible for this guy’s death.” He hikes his thumb at the shroomist.
She pales. I smile. Good. Now that she understands the seriousness of the situation, I ask again. “Which shrooms?”
Exhaling strongly, she walks up to the carts. “She doesn’t really have a favourite. She likes anything and everything if you haven’t noticed. Spiders. Rikas. Wasps. Jacolas.” She turns to me. “You.”
My lips twitch with a smile. I know she meant it as an insult given everything else she listed is venomous, but I don’t care.
She said Arienna likes me. A lot of the tension in my chest eases.
That damn hope explodes like a witch’s fire, burning away the last of my hesitation.
I want Arienna, and I’ll kill the entire Court if I have to, to keep her.
“But she especially likes those with meanings attached to them,” Fabia continues.
I glance at the shroomist for an explanation.
“Some shrooms mean different things,” he says. Pulling a blue shroom out, he holds it towards me. “This is a symbol of prosperity and wealth.”
“Do you have one for ‘I showed mercy to your pathetic excuse of an ex’?”
“You let him go?” Fabia cuts in. I’m not surprised she knows about Karl. Whatever they say about men liking to gossip, guards like it more.
“She did ask me to,” I say tightly.
“But you challenged him.”
“Yes.”
She studies me, her silver eyes cold in her assessment. Sighing, she picks up a teal shroom with white polka dots on its rim. “Teal is Arienna’s favourite colour.”
“Thank you.” I turn to the shroomist. “Make a hundred bouquets that centre around this colour for the ball next week and send one to her chambers the evening of. I’m assuming I don’t have to tell you what will happen if word gets out about this conversation?”
He nods.
“You’re dismissed.”
As he scurries out the door, I head for the minibar in my room. Pulling out a bottle of ambrosia and two glasses, I set them on the table and pour. Picking the tumblers up, I hand one to Fabia. She hesitates for a few seconds before taking it.
Settling in a chair, I say, “Now tell me what kind of food she likes, and I’ll let you train for a position in the Royal Guard.”
Her eyes light up despite her desire to still hate me. But I have spent years learning how to manipulate my enemies to get what I want; figuring out how to make a brownie like me can’t be that hard.
“I can’t be bought that easily,” she says stubbornly.
“Of course not. But you can protect her better at her side than locked in your room as collateral.”
Her jaw tightens.
I lean back. “And perhaps you’ll get good enough one day to kill me yourself.”
Her eyes narrow; she isn’t dumb.
But she can’t pass up the opportunity to learn more ways to protect the woman she loves.
As she begrudgingly starts to answer my questions, I listen intently. Arienna might only see the monster now, but I’ll make her see the man.