Chapter 22
Sephtis
It was the first time I was still in the room when Cole woke up.
I could almost see the expressions as they crossed his face—happiness while he was still too exhausted to really realize what was going on, and then a flash of anger when his mind made the connection.
That anger actually forced him to push up into a sitting position, which made the blanket slide down his bare chest.
My eyes caught on the rise and fall of his skin, the shiny scars where the Enmity had torn him apart… on the red thread and the bits of black swirling at the edges. I had to force my gaze back up to his.
“You’re still here.” He finally spoke in a whisper, though I noticed he wasn’t recoiling, wasn’t drawing the sheet back up to cover himself. Cole just brought his hand up and scrubbed it through his hair, the soft blond sticking up at odd angles from the lake water.
“I couldn’t leave.” It wasn’t exactly a confession so much as a fact.
After we’d pulled ourselves from the lake and listened for the sound of the hounds fading as they took their prize to Death, Cole had linked his fingers with my own and led me back to my apartment.
He didn’t let me go when he silently stripped out of his wet pants and came to my room…
and he didn’t let me go when he pulled the blanket over his shoulders and wordlessly closed his eyes.
I wasn’t sure if he wanted to act like nothing had happened now in the light of day, but I knew I couldn’t keep on pretending after the way he’d touched me, after he’d kissed me like I was the only way he could inhale.
I wasn’t sure if I could ever leave him again, when all I could see when I closed my eyes was the soft bliss written across his features like poetry. I’d told him Heaven wasn’t real, and he’d made me a liar. It was right there, touching him. Feeling him. Seeing him open up.
“You mean you can’t pretend anymore?” He said it like a question, but I knew he didn’t need me to answer. I moved closer to him instead, careful when I lifted my hand, cautious when I let my fingers drift up to thread through his hair.
His warmth penetrated the coolness of my palm, and I watched him war with himself before he finally let his eyes drift shut and leaned into the touch.
It was everything—it was proof that a few days could be a lifetime. He’d jerked away from my touch on the bridge and it had broken me.
But now he let out a groan and brought his hand up to brush his fingers along the length of my wrist before he stood.
He was quiet as he shuffled around the room, didn’t ask permission when he pulled one of my shirts from my closet and slipped it over his head.
He waited until he was dressed before he turned back to me, and his arms crossing over his chest were the only indicator of the insecurity he felt.
“What are we going to do, Sephtis?”
I wasn’t sure what he was asking. Did he mean about the hounds, who I knew would find us sooner rather than later if we didn’t move… or did he mean about the man we’d left dead in his home?
Or maybe he meant what we were going to do about the fact that he still needed Vitality, that I had to feed the hole in his chest that commanded death to keep him alive.
Would he want to go with me again?
What were we going to do…
“I don’t know.” I breathed the answer in a sigh and stood, moving toward the living room. “But I know we need help. This place isn’t safe anymore… the sooner we leave, the better. I just…”
I didn’t know where to go. I didn’t know what to do.
I just knew I would do whatever I had to if it meant keeping him safe.
That hadn’t changed after last night. If anything, that need burned stronger.
Brighter.
As bright as the crimson thread trailing between us like a guiding light, leading me to the only thing in this world that truly mattered.
The only thing that had ever mattered.
Cole stepped into the room behind me and crossed his arms. “Yeah, and who are you going to call for help, Sephtis?”
There was really only one person I could call, wasn’t there?
It took less time than I expected to explain everything that was going on. Wren listened with wide eyes. It was Theo who kept making incredulous sounds beneath his breath, his gaze flicking between me and Cole like he was watching a movie.
It did sound like something out of sheer fantasy, even for supernatural beings like us—I’d heard of a lot of things, but I’d never heard of a human who had to feed on Vitality to keep himself alive.
I’d never heard of a human who’d taken in little bits and pieces of Death either, and I wondered the same question that Wren finally asked out loud.
“Do you think he needs it because of that darkness?” Wren’s eyes focused on the thread, and I knew he could probably see it too. “It’s the same shit I see in your veins, so it kind of makes sense.”
It didn’t make any sense, but I understood the logic.
“I don’t know. If that’s what’s burning through his Vitality before he can make it himself, maybe there’s a way to fix it.” Maybe there was a way I could at least give him back as normal a life as I could manage.
Even though we would always be chased by the hounds, by Death himself. Even though it was me just as much as him now that was the problem.
“Sounds like you need a lot of books.” Theo leaned forward, his elbows on his knees and his expression thoughtful. “Though the last time I thought that was a good idea, I died… so…” He paused and wrinkled his nose. “Also, this room feels fucking horrible.”
Of course it felt horrible to him. It was a deadzone, and he was a human turned creature. It was probably warring with his senses, trying to remind him of what he’d been.
What he could never be again.
The thought made my eyes slip back to Cole.
I could still see the little sparks of black dancing just beneath his skin, parts of me that he would never be rid of now that they were there.
Bits and pieces of Death that he’d fed when he killed that man, giving them strength to take root and hold tight.
It was his now—his and mine. Our burden to share.
“Books, right. I might… I might know somewhere you can go, Sephtis. But I don’t know if it’s a good idea.” Wren’s voice was cautious as he looked between us, his long, elegant fingers twisting the pendant I’d given him over and over like he wasn’t sure he liked what he was saying.
“Where?”
“Listen.” He shook his head. “I don’t know if you really want to do this. Owing me a favor was one thing. But Gethin is different, he—”
“He’s an asshole,” Theo supplied, and Wren shot him a look.
“He’s desperate.”
Warmth spilling along my side made the tension in my body fade away. Cole didn’t take my hand, but the back of his fingers brushed mine like he couldn’t quite resist the comfort that came with the connection. “So are we.”
He was so earnest, laying everything out at our feet like it wasn’t dangerous to be honest. If Wren wasn’t someone we could trust—if Theo was actually the monster he looked like he was…
If any of this somehow got back to Aiden…
We’d be fucked.
But we were fucked either way, weren’t we? The hounds weren’t leaving. I could still hear them on the edge of the property. The soul of the man Cole had murdered had thrown them off our scent, but it wasn’t enough.
Not when they knew they were looking for a rogue Reaper now, and not when Cole had taken the Vitality from that man’s body just as much as I had. He wasn’t a Reaper, but he’d still drunk it down straight from the source.
Unnatural.
Impossible.
Here, and standing warm and living beside me, and I still couldn’t find it in me to regret it for even a moment.
We were on the edge of a graveyard, standing behind gates, though it wasn’t the iron keeping us out—it was the strongest barrier I’d ever felt in my life. I was fairly certain I couldn’t have pushed through it, even if I’d used all my strength.
It was perfect.
I didn’t know if it would keep us safe forever, but it was better than anything I could possibly have come up with, stronger than anything I’d ever felt.
Wren had gotten on the phone after I’d finally talked him into asking his friend for help, and after a short conversation where he’d confirmed that I was the Reaper who’d helped Theo, the call ended and Wren had given us the address to the cemetery where we stood now.
At first, I was worried we were going to be left waiting, as the sky above us started to darken and the sound of thunder in the distance warned of rain. And then I saw a blond head appear. A man started toward us, and my eyes widened slightly.
I’d seen him before, fleeing as I’d come to reap souls.
Souls.
The man was a killer, and from what Wren had told me… he wasn’t human.
He came into view, and I was caught up in his eyes—a burst of lilac surrounded by blue so light it was almost white.
Ex-cupid.
On some level, it was almost fitting that we were here. After all, he’d gone against the laws of his master as well, hadn’t he?
That was why he was here.
That was why he was desperate for a favor.
“Are you Gethin?” Cole sounded braver than he should have, and the only thing that showed he was feeling nervous was the way his hand spilled out, his fingers brushing against the back of mine again.
He was still fighting his feelings during the day, but there was only so much he could do… only so long he could pretend.
I’d take the little gestures.
“You’re… the Reaper and the… what, half ghost?
Psychic vampire? Freak of nature?” Gethin’s smile wasn’t friendly when he looked us over, and Cole’s scowl was full of irritation when he stepped closer.
I caught his hand before he had a chance to try to cross the barrier.
I wasn’t sure if it would hurt him… if it would try to rip his soul from his body so the human parts of him could still cross.
Whatever it would do, I wasn’t going to take the chance. I threaded my fingers through his and pulled so he bumped back against my chest… and the shock that poured through me when I felt the way he settled was enough to make us both go quiet.
Gethin looked between us, and then his eyes dropped down to Cole’s chest and he let out a bitter laugh.
“Gods, what does Wren think this is, Gethin’s home for wayward soulmates?” He shook his head and stepped forward, standing on the edge of the barrier and running his fingers along it like he could see it.
“What?” I had no idea what he was talking about, and he rolled his oddly colored eyes heavenward as the thunder drew closer and it started to rain.
“It’s a television… you know what? Never mind. I’ll help you, but I want a favor in return.”
A favor.
That was exactly what Wren had said he would want. I was putting a lot of faith in the cupid, trusting that the man in front of us wouldn’t do anything to betray us… trusting that his barrier would hold.
I was putting my life and Cole’s in the hands of a man who I knew was a killer… but when he murmured something beneath his breath and I could almost see the door in the barrier open, I didn’t hesitate.
“Whatever I can give.”
It wasn’t a promise that I would do whatever he wanted, but it was the best I could manage, given the circumstances. It was what he’d have to settle on.
“Perfect. I’ll take it all.” The smile on his face wasn’t exactly kind, and the excitement in his eyes told me I might be biting off more than I could chew.
Cole was the one who didn’t move forward, and he turned his head to look up at me. He didn’t bother whispering, since it was obvious that Gethin would hear us anyway with how close he was standing.
“Are you sure about this?”
I wasn’t, but… “I trust Wren.” It was really that simple. I trusted him, and if he thought Gethin could keep us safe, I’d sell myself down the river with whatever favor Gethin wanted from me. It was worth it if it meant I could keep Cole by my side.
He was still hesitating, though.
“Either you want my help or not. The barrier is closing in thirty seconds, and I’m not opening it again. I’d make a decision if I were you.”
Either he was too trusting or extremely cocky, because Gethin turned his back on us and started back down the path I’d watched him come from.
“Sephtis…”
“We don’t have any other options. Come on.” I pushed him forward, and thankfully he let me. When we crossed through the barrier, something in my chest squeezed tight for just a moment… and the small, audible pop behind me when it closed was nearly deafening.
But then everything settled. The rain on my skin was cool, stinging… the only thing that felt pressing enough to make me go inside.
It was like I could feel the way this place was safe.
I just didn’t know what the price of that safety would be… and in the end, I didn’t care. Cole’s fingers were still in mine, like he’d forgotten that he needed to pull away. And that feeling was worth everything.