Chapter Five
Natalie dreamed of sheep. All kinds. Baby lambs, adults heavy with wool and some that had just been shaved. She dreamed of sweaters and yarn and of a special sheep that had to be carried back to the safety of the farm.
She sat and watched as the man she’d listened to for hours, would’ve listened to for the rest of her life if she could’ve, ran around her with the sheep. Would ask her to count them, to make sure they didn’t get lost in the darkness.
It was a crazy dream, because she knew she was dreaming, knew this wasn’t real. She felt funny, like she was moving.
She was on a train, her tired brain remembered, but her eyes refused to open. But the movement felt different. Like she was being carried somewhere.
But she didn’t want to go anywhere else; she just wanted to stay here on the nice farm with the sheep.
“No, please,” she murmured.
“Shh,” someone said. “You’re just dreaming.”
That voice, that smoky, sexy voice again. She didn’t want it to stop. Ren’s voice.
“Sheep,” she said, hoping he’d understand. She wanted him to tell her more stories.
“Yes, the sheep. Stay with the sheep, Peaches.”
Peaches. That made her feel warm. So nice and warm. She just lay there and basked in it.
But soon the warm became hot. Too hot. What was happening? The sheep were nowhere around anymore. Just the heat. A fire. It was burning her.
Natalie forced her eyes open only to find she was surrounded by smoke. She coughed and sat up. Where was she? What was happening?
And why in the world was she outside sitting in half a foot of snow?
“Natalie, stay there.” It was Ren again, somewhere nearby but she couldn’t see him through the smoke. “There’s been an accident.”
“A-an accident?” She tried to clear fog from her brain but couldn’t.
“Yes, the train derailed or something. Crashed.” Suddenly he was there kneeling beside her. She could still barely see him through the smoke, but could see blood streaming over his temple. She coughed again.
“There’s a fire.” She still couldn’t figure out what was going on. “You’re bleeding.”
“I’m fine. But yes, the train is on fire. You need to stay back. I’m not sure what sort of materials the freight sections were hauling. Could be combustible.”
She tried to focus on his words, to understand them, and she did, but it was like they had to wade through mud to get to her brain. She put her hands up to her head.
“Are you okay?”
“My brain is so slow. How did I get here?” She couldn’t remember any of it.
“I carried you. I’ll tell you the whole story later, okay? But right now I need to go back.”
She grabbed his wrists. The thought of him leaving her alone in the dark and smoke and snow, when she couldn’t process anything, scared her.
“Am I hurt?” she asked. “I can’t seem to figure things out. I feel almost drunk.”
“Maybe you hit your head. But I’ve got to get back in there.”
It finally became clear to her. “Oh, my God, the other people. I’ll help you.” She tried to stand up but dizziness assaulted her.
Ren’s hand fell on her shoulder. “No, you just stay here. Trust me, in the shape you’re in, you’ll do more harm than good.”
“But that elderly lady...”
He gave a curt shake of his head. “She’s gone, Peaches. She and the guy who was hitting on you. The way the train car flipped when we derailed...if I hadn’t changed spots with the guy it would’ve been me dead. No one could’ve survived.”
Natalie bit back a sob. “Oh, no.”
“Just stay here, okay? I’m going to see if I can find the train engineers, although, honestly, I’m not holding out much hope. But just don’t move. We’re not far from a ravine, and I don’t want you falling. Plus, it’ll just put us both in more danger if I have to look out for you, too.”
He was right. She couldn’t even stand up on her own. “Okay. Be careful.”
She felt like he was gone for hours, although she knew it couldn’t be more than a few minutes.
She was shivering and clenched her jaw as her teeth started chattering.
Her stomach revolted every time she moved.
She touched all around her head gingerly to see if she could find any lumps that would signify some sort of concussion, but couldn’t find anything.
How the hell did someone just sleep through a train crash that killed at least two people? She remembered dreaming about sheep. About feeling like she was being carried and hearing Ren’s voice. Had that been after the crash? When he was getting her out?
Her brain just felt so sluggish. She knew sitting in the snow wasn’t helping—physically or mentally—but was afraid to move in case she couldn’t find Ren again. The dark and smoke just seemed so all-encompassing. And until her brain started working again, she didn’t want to be alone.
But Ren had already been bleeding before he went back to try to help the train engineers. What if he was hurt worse than she thought? What if he was trapped somewhere right now and couldn’t get out without help?
She couldn’t sit here and do nothing.
She took a few steps into the smoke, coughing as it became thicker. The fire seemed to be getting louder.
“Ren?” she yelled between coughs. “Where are you? Let me help!”
She couldn’t hear or see anything. The smoke was too thick.
“Ren!”
Which way should she go? She took a few steps in the direction of what she thought would be the front of the train and where he had headed but she couldn’t be sure.
“Natalie!” She’d only gotten a few more steps before she heard him behind her. She turned and ran back in the direction she’d come, arms in front of her in the smoke.
“Ren. I’m here!”
She felt his arms come around her. “Thank God,” he whispered against her hair. “I didn’t know where you were.”
“I couldn’t just stay and do nothing. I was worried you might be hurt.” She reached up and touched the blood that had dried on his temple.
He kept one arm around her as he led her farther away. “I’m fine. But we’ve got to get out of here. There’s definitely some explosive materials, not to mention we’re going to have to find some shelter.”
“Is everybody...” She couldn’t bring herself to say it.
“They are. I’m sorry, Natalie. It looks like everyone was killed in the initial impact. Somehow we both made it, but we’re going to have to get moving if we’re going to keep it that way. We’ve got to go. Right now.”
He pulled her, half walking, half running, before wrapping his arm around her and leading them into darkness. She had no idea where they were going, but Ren was determined to get them away from where they’d been.
She understood why a few moments later when a loud fireball burst behind them. Natalie let out a little shriek and fell forward, only saved from falling face-first into the snow by his arm around her.
“Oh, my gosh, was that the train?” She could finally see him a little more clearly now that they were coming out of the smoke.
“Yes, that’s why I wanted to get us out of there. But I didn’t expect the explosion to be quite that big. Are you okay?”
It was so out of character for her, but she just wanted to lean into him. Into his strength. She didn’t know this man at all. Didn’t know if he could be trusted. But it didn’t stop her from resting her forehead on his chest for just a moment.
They’d almost died. Surely it was okay to take just a second and rest here against him.
After a breath she pushed away. She realized he had both her larger backpack and the smaller one.
“I found both your bags—they got thrown from the passenger car. I couldn’t find mine, but at least I got my coat.”
He set her backpacks on the ground, and Natalie immediately knelt and opened the bigger one, pulling out a dry sweater. No point in putting on dry pants, they were just going to get wet again as they walked.
But at least they were alive. Unlike the others. Tears filled her eyes.
“Hey, you okay?”
“Yeah, I just can’t believe this is happening. That everybody’s dead and we’re not.”
He nodded. “I know. Me, too. But we’ll have to process it later. Right now survival is the most important thing.”
He was right. She would cry for these strangers, but it couldn’t be right now. Like he said, survival was the most important thing. That thought helped cut through the fog in her brain a little more.
Survival.
She had been doing that for six years. She had survived everything Damien had done to her, and she would survive this crash. That was what Natalie did: survive.
Already, she felt a little better, a little clearer, a little stronger. She clenched her jaw against the chattering of her teeth.
“You’re right. Survival is the most important thing.” She began digging through the backpack again.
“I don’t guess you have hiking boots in there?” Ren asked.
“No, only the tennis shoes on my feet.”
“Yeah, me, too. But that’s better than nothing. Get as warm as you can, and if you’ve got an extra sweater to wrap around your head, that will help, too. The body loses a lot of its heat from the head. I have an extra pair of gloves, so use those.”
She did as he suggested and handed him a second sweater. He looked a little surprised before taking it and wrapping it around his own head.
“Thanks.”
“Do you know where we are?” she asked. “I have no idea what state we’re even in.”
“I’ve taken this trip a few times, and based on how long we’ve been traveling since our stop, I’d put us just over the Utah/Colorado line. But it doesn’t matter what state we’re in. Either way we’re high altitude and not near anything. This was the worst possible place this could’ve happened.”
“Should we stay near the train? Won’t someone come looking for us?”
He gave her the smaller backpack and put the larger one on himself.
“Eventually they’ll come when we don’t show up at our next scheduled stop.
But that is more than eighteen hours from now.
Then by the time they figure out something’s actually wrong and get someone out here. ..we’ll die from exposure.”
“Oh.” Natalie fought not to get overwhelmed. One hour at a time. She just needed to take it one hour at a time.
And at least she was in absolutely no danger from Damien up here. That thought made her smile.
“Want to share your happy thoughts?” Ren tapped the corner of her lips. “I wouldn’t mind a little good news.”
“Nothing. We’re alive. That’s what matters. But I guess I shouldn’t be smiling.”
He pinched the tip of her chin gently. “No, it’s okay to smile. We are alive. Let’s just keep it that way. We need to find shelter for tonight and we’ll take stock of everything tomorrow. Food. Water. Figure out a plan.”
“Okay. I have a sleeping bag, some protein bars and a water filtering system.”
“You do?” Incredulity painted his tone. “Were you on your way to a camping trip or something?”
Yeah, explaining camping equipment when she had no clothes that could be used for that type of activity wasn’t easy. “I was sort of relocating and had this stuff in my bag.”
“It’ll definitely come in handy. Let’s get going.”
Natalie took a couple steps, then had to stop as dizziness assailed her again.
“You all right?”
“Yeah. I must have hit my head in the crash, although nothing feels tender. I’m just woozy.”
He began to walk again, but kept her close to him as they moved. “Shock. Altitude. Cold. A lot of things could be affecting you. And yeah, I’m sure we’ll both be totally sore tomorrow.”
“Better sore than dead.”
She felt his arm tighten around her waist. “Always.”