13. Fiona
Chapter Thirteen
FIONA
I can’t stop thinking about it. About him. About the way he took control of my body like he owned every inch of me, like I had no choice but to follow. I hate that even as I tell myself I shouldn’t, I want more because nothing has ever left me feeling like this.
Pacing my apartment with my hands buried in my hair, I try to shake the memory of Cormac pinning my body against the desk and taking what he needed from me.
I need to do something, anything, to push it out of my head, but the feral look on his face as he spilled inside me is seared into my brain.
My phone buzzes on the counter, pulling me back to the present.
I snatch it up, grateful for the interruption, and see Zoe’s name flashing on the screen.
“Hey.” I force my voice to sound casual.
Zoe laughs. “Oh, wow, I didn’t actually think you would answer.”
“Why wouldn’t I answer?”
“Because it’s almost ten p.m. on a Monday. Normally, you’re in bed by like seven.”
I sink down onto the edge of the couch and run a hand over my face. “I had to stay late at work.”
“You sound tired,” she says, immediately cutting to the chase.
I am, but not for the reason she thinks.
“Amber called.”
Please take the bait so I can steer the conversation away from my work.
“She’s six, I didn’t think she had a phone.”
“She doesn’t. She stole Joe’s phone when he was passed out asleep.”
Zoe chuckles. “Oh, my god. She’s going to be one hell of a teenager.”
“Tell me about it. I hate that she had to steal it, though, just to be able to talk to me. It’s not fair to her.”
“Well, we have established that Joe is a Class A dick.”
“Urgh, I know. Anyway, what’s up? Why are you up so late?”
Zoe laughs. “Sweetie, this is practically early afternoon for me. But I just got off the phone with my aunt.”
My back straightens as the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. “And?”
“She couldn’t tell me anything you don’t already know. Turns out breaking HIPAA is a criminal offense. But what she was able to say is that Amber’s doctor is the best of the best. You don’t have to worry about that.”
I let out a breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding.
It’s good to hear that Amber is in safe hands from someone other than Lorcan.
“Thanks.”
“Sorry I couldn’t be of much more help.”
“You’ve done more than enough, Zo.”
“So, what are you going to do about Joe?”
“What do you mean?”
“Clearly, Amber needs you, Fi. She’s six years old, and she’s in the hospital. She must be scared shitless, and she doesn’t have her mom anymore. You’re the next best thing.”
“Believe me, I want to be there for her. I hate that she had to steal her dad’s phone just to talk to me. But I can’t figure out how to get Joe to cooperate. He’s… useless.”
“That’s the polite way of putting it. What he should do is put whatever issue you two have to the side and focus on what is best for Amber.”
“I’m not holding on to hope that he’s going to suddenly mature.”
“Well…there is always another way.”
I frown. “What do you mean?”
Zoe is quiet for a beat before she whispers down the phone. “My uncle, the one involved in, you know…organized crime.”
“Zoe, hell no.”
“Why not? Maybe he could look into Joe. See if there’s something you can use to?—”
“Absolutely not.” I shake my head, even though she can’t see it. “The last time I trusted anyone from that world, my sister ended up betraying me and, well…you know the rest.”
“I do, but?—”
“But nothing. Carly died because I got involved with people like your uncle.”
People like Lorcan.
Like Cormac.
“I will never make that mistake again.” I try to ignore the phantom feeling of Cormac’s hands on my body, his lips on my neck, of that raw force that left me shaking with need.
God, why can’t I stop thinking about him?
“If you’re sure…”
“I’m sure.”
“Well, I should let you get your beauty sleep.”
“Is that code for I’m being a bitch and you don’t want to talk to me anymore?”
Zoe laughs. “Honestly? Yes.”
“Sometimes, I wonder why you’re friends with me.”
“Only sometimes?”
I huff a laugh.
“Sleep well, Fi.”
“I’ll try,” I mumble, but with my mind still full of Cormac, I have a horrible feeling sleep isn’t going to come.
I’m starting to second-guess my plan of seducing Cormac. It sounded like a good idea at the time, but after walking past his office this morning and seeing him sitting behind his desk… It’s a miracle I made it into my office without my legs giving out.
He might have an attitude problem, but that jawline sure as hell makes up for it.
After making myself a coffee, I sit down at my desk and quickly pull up Cormac’s calendar.
Thankfully, he’s in back-to-back meetings all day, which means there’s no chance of running into him in the hallway.
Part of me is relieved, but the other part of me, the part that is still sore from where he took me against his desk, wants to go and seek him out.
Is he thinking about it too? Or am I just another notch on his metaphorical bedpost?
I frown at the thought.
As much as I’ve tried telling myself I don’t care and that the sex means nothing, I know I’m kidding myself.
This is exactly why I should have kept my panties on. Sex and emotions go hand in hand, at least for me, and now I’ve gone and gotten myself attached to a Sullivan.
I stare down at my already empty cup. “I’m going to need a lot more coffee.”
The hours pass in a blur as I fight to keep up with the influx of emails that land in my inbox.
Just when I finally have it cleared, I go and make myself another cup of coffee and come back to find twenty more. But I shouldn’t complain. Anything that stops me from thinking about Cormac is a good thing.
By the time seven o’clock rolls around, I’m suitably worked up and ready for round two. My workday technically ended over an hour ago, but I’m still here, waiting for the rest of the office to empty out before I make my move.
After Melody stops by to drop off some paperwork before she heads home, I quickly run a brush through my hair and spray some perfume onto my collarbone before crossing the hall to Cormac’s office.
I peer around the door.
“Was there something you wanted, Miss Callahan?”
“You tell me.”
Cormac’s eyes flick up to meet mine, and I fight a smile as I see them darken with need.
I don’t look away as I shut the door and slowly cross the room, making a point to accentuate the sway of my hips with each step. It seems to do the trick, as by the time I reach the desk, Cormac is on his feet and closing the distance between us.
He stares down at me. “Let me make something very clear. This thing between us…is purely physical.”
I barely hear a word he says. All I can focus on is how big he is. Even in heels, I have to strain my neck to look up at him. And he smells incredible, like he just took a bath in a forest during a rainstorm.
“I know,” I manage to say.
“That’s what every woman says.”
“Ah, so you sleep with all your assistants?”
Cormac glowers down at me, but I don’t balk.
I shrug. “Don’t worry, I can keep things professional.”
“Good, because believe me, just because I fuck you doesn’t mean I’ll be any less demanding when it comes to your job.”
Even just hearing Cormac say fuck has me squirming on the spot.
“I can handle anything.”
Cormac keeps his eyes locked on mine as he reaches for his desk drawer and pulls it open. “Are you sure about that?”
My eyes flick to the object in his hand, and the hairs on the back of my neck stand up as I eye the six-inch blade.
Of all the things I was hoping he would pull out of that drawer, a knife isn’t one of them.
I came in here for sex, not to get murdered.
He smirks. “Don’t worry. You’ll enjoy it.”
Easy for him to say. He won’t be the one bleeding to death.
His eyes are glued to mine. “Do you trust me?”
Hell fucking no.
But, of course, I nod because the only other option is to bolt out of here and lose any progress that I’ve made with Cormac.
He tilts the blade so that the overhead light bounces off it. “I’m going to need you to say the words out loud.”
“I trust you,” I say, even though my body is screaming at me to run.
“Good. Now, lie on the desk and lift up your dress.”
I glance over at the door. “Uh… Aren’t you going to lock that?”
“Where would be the fun in that?”
My heart is pounding in my chest.
This could be the stupidest thing I’ve ever done. I am not just putting my pleasure in Cormac’s hands, but apparently also my life. But that’s not enough to stop me from doing exactly as he says.
Lying back on the desk, I pull my dress up around my waist. I keep my eyes locked on the knife, not wanting to drop my guard completely.
For all I know, Cormac has found out I’m working with Lorcan and is about to plunge that knife right into my neck.
He moves to stand between my legs. “I suggest you do exactly as I ask. I wouldn’t want you to get hurt.”
My mouth goes dry as he slowly runs the tip of the blade along my thigh.
He’s barely applying any pressure, but it’s still enough to get my pulse quickening.
Cormac’s eyes darken as he drags the blade higher and higher up my thigh.
“What are you planning to do with that?” I ask a little breathlessly.
“Why? Are you nervous?”
Cormac smirks before he slides the blade beneath the seam of my panties and quickly slices through the material.
I suck in a breath as he does the same to the other side before tugging at the scraps of lace until I’m laid bare before him.
“Much better. Now, spread those thighs wider so I can taste you.”
This man is actually going to kill me.
I do as he asks, watching his eyes flash with hunger when I finally part my legs. That look alone is enough to have me aching with need, but it becomes almost unbearable when he lowers his mouth to my pussy.
My back bows off the desk at the first drag of his tongue along my core, but I quickly recover when something sharp stings my thigh.
“I’m going to need you to stay still,” Cormac warns as he looks up at me from between my thighs.
He can’t be serious.
As if reading my thoughts, Cormac flicks his tongue over my clit as he digs the tip of the blade into my inner thigh.