Chapter Three #2
I held my own gaze for a moment, jaw tight, then straightened up and looked away. There was nothing to be gained from staring at the damage. It would heal or it wouldn’t. Either way, I was already miles from where it had happened.
The door to the station opened with a jingle of bells, and Decker stepped out carrying two paper cups.
He handed one to me without comment—no look that lingered on the bruise, no careful handling like I was made of something breakable.
Just the simple acknowledgment that I’d asked for something to drink and he’d brought it.
The coffee was terrible—burnt and too sweet, the kind that came from a machine that had been running since the previous morning—but it was hot and it gave me something to focus on besides the ache in my ribs and the questions I didn’t want to answer.
We got back in the truck. Decker pulled back onto the highway, pointing us west again, and settled into the quiet rhythm of long-distance driving—hands relaxed on the wheel, eyes tracking the road ahead, attention divided between the immediate task and whatever thoughts were running through his head.
The darkness began to thin around us as we pushed further west, the first hint of dawn visible as a lighter line along the eastern horizon.
The landscape was changing too—the flat Nebraska grassland giving way to something wider, the sky pulling back from the horizon, the first hint of hills in the distance.
I’d never been west of Omaha before. My world had always been bounded by the flatness of eastern Nebraska—fields that stretched to the horizon in every direction, sky that felt like it was pressing down rather than opening up.
This new landscape—with its gradual rises and wider views—felt like a physical expansion, as if the world itself was getting bigger with each mile we covered.
“Colorado?” I asked, gesturing toward the changing view.
Decker nodded. “We’ll cross into Wyoming in a couple hours, then Montana after that.”
The sun broke over the horizon as we reached the state line, turning the gray dawn to gold.
I watched it through the windshield, hands wrapped around the paper cup of cooling coffee, and felt something in my chest loosen just slightly—the first crack in the wall I’d built around myself six months ago.
Montana arrived the way big country does, gradually and then all at once.
The land opened up around us, hills giving way to valleys, valleys to wider plains.
The sky pulled back from the horizon, expanding overhead until it seemed to curve at the edges, a perfect blue dome that made the Nebraska sky look small by comparison.
And then, cutting the western horizon like a dark blade, was Black Butte—a single mountain rising from the flat, its slopes covered in pine and aspen, its peak catching the morning light.
“That’s it,” Decker said, nodding toward the mountain. “The ranch is at its base.”
I’d never seen anything like it—had never imagined that a single piece of land could contain so much space, so much possibility.
Something in my chest that had been locked down for months—since the first whispers started at the hospital, since the first “accidental” shove into a doorframe, since the day I’d realized I wasn’t safe in my own hometown—loosened just slightly at the sheer scale of it.
Black Butte Ranch came into view as we turned off the main highway onto a gravel road: a weathered two-story farmhouse with a wide front porch, a massive red barn with its paint faded to the color of old blood, and a scatter of outbuildings settled into the landscape like they’d always been there.
A metal silo caught the morning light, its surface gleaming.
Horses grazed in a pasture to the east, their coats shining in the early sun.
The place had the feeling of something built to last—the careful consideration of generations visible in the placement of the buildings, the relationship between house and barn, the way the whole property oriented toward the mountain at its back.
Decker pulled the truck to a stop in front of the house and killed the engine. The sudden silence was startling after hours of road noise. I sat with my hands in my lap, suddenly uncertain what came next.
The front door of the house opened, and a man stepped out onto the porch.
He was tall—taller than Decker, with a build that spoke of military training rather than farm work.
His head was completely bald, his jaw squared and set.
He moved with a caution of someone with an old injury, one leg slightly stiffer than the other, but there was nothing hesitant about the way he approached us.
This had to be Rawley—the owner Decker had mentioned, the former SEAL who’d given him a job when he got out of the service.
He came down the porch steps with unhurried precision, reading the situation without needing it explained—the beaten-up omega in the passenger seat, the former operator behind the wheel, the unspoken question hanging in the air between us.
I waited to feel like a problem being managed, the feeling of being an inconvenience, a complication, something to be dealt with rather than welcomed. It was a familiar feeling, one I’d carried since the day I’d returned to Nebraska and found out the town’s opinion of me hadn’t changed.
Decker climbed out of the truck and walked a few paces to meet Rawley.
They exchanged low words I couldn’t hear, their bodies angled toward each other, military posture even in conversation.
Rawley’s face remained neutral, but something in his expression shifted when he glanced back at the truck—a reassessment, a decision being made.
Then he turned and walked toward me, his stride measured, and I braced myself for the questions—the careful interrogation, the weighing of risk against obligation, the quick calculations that happened when someone’s safety became someone else’s responsibility.
Rawley stopped a few feet from the passenger door and looked at me directly—not at the bruise, not past me, but straight at my face with an assessment that felt like it was taking my measure down to the bone.
“Jasper?” he asked, the single word carrying the weight of a longer question.
I nodded. “Yes, sir.”
“You a nurse?”
The question caught me off guard—not the one I’d been expecting, not the careful exploration of what had happened or what I needed. Just a straightforward request for information.
“I was,” I said. “Neonatal. For eight years.”
Rawley’s expression didn’t change, but something in his posture shifted slightly—a decision being made, a path being chosen. “You hurt?”
I shook my head. “Nothing that won’t heal.”
He held my gaze for a long moment, then nodded once. “Good.”
That was it. No follow-up questions, no reassurances, no performance of concern. Just the simple acknowledgment that I was here, I was injured, but functional, and that was enough information to proceed.
I was still trying to process the exchange when movement from the side of the barn caught my eye.
Two toddlers came toddling around the corner, one slightly ahead of the other, both barely steady on their feet.
They were identical—same round faces, same shock of dark hair, same serious expressions as they made their unsteady way across the gravel.
The one in front—a boy, from the blue overalls—was moving faster than his coordination could support. He took three rapid steps, lost his balance, and went down hard on the gravel, hands splayed, face hitting the ground with an audible thud.
The crying started immediately—the wail of genuine pain rather than any real upset. I was across the yard before I’d made a conscious decision to move, muscle memory taking over where thought left off.
I crouched beside the child, one hand cupped around the back of his small head, the other already reaching for his hands to check for damage. “Hey,” I said, voice dropping into the low, even register I’d used in the NICU. “Hey, buddy. Let me see.”
His face was screwed up with the effort of crying, fat tears tracking down round cheeks, a scrape already forming on one palm where he’d caught himself.
I used the hem of my shirt to wipe the gravel from the wound, talking him through it in the same steady voice—acknowledging the pain without feeding the fear, creating a space where hurt could exist without being the whole story.
“Does it hurt?” I asked, keeping my voice matter-of-fact. “Yeah, it does. Scrapes hurt. But you know what? They get better really fast. Faster than you’d think.”
The crying slowed, then stopped, the child’s attention caught by the novelty of being spoken to like a person with agency rather than a problem to be solved. The other child, a girl, had stopped a few feet away, watching the scene with wide eyes, clearly unsure whether she should be upset too.
“That’s it,” I said, brushing a final piece of gravel from the boy’s palm. “All clean. You want to try standing up?”
He nodded, lower lip still trembling slightly, and reached for my hand. I helped him to his feet, keeping my grip light, letting him find his balance on his own terms.
“There you go,” I said. “Good as new.”
Only when the immediate crisis was resolved did I remember where I was—kneeling in the gravel of a Montana ranch at dawn, a toddler’s tears drying on my shirt, two adults watching the scene with unreadable expressions.
I looked up, suddenly aware of how the situation must appear—a stranger with a bruised face appearing out of nowhere to tend to a child who wasn’t mine.
Rawley’s expression had changed, the careful neutrality giving way to something that looked almost like recognition. He turned to Decker, who had moved to stand a few paces behind me, and said two words that changed my fate forever: “He stays.”
Not a question. Not even really a decision—more like the acknowledgment of something that had already been decided.
Decker nodded once. “I’ll get him settled.”
Rawley turned back to me, his face settling into its previous neutrality.
“You need anything, tell Deck,” he said.
“He knows where everything is.” Then, to the toddler, who had recovered enough to be eyeing me with suspicious interest: “Ethan, Margot, this is Jasper. He’s going to be staying with us for a while. ”
The child—Ethan—regarded me with the focus of the very young, then nodded once, apparently satisfied with whatever assessment he’d made. He took the little girl’s hand and the two of them toddled back toward the house, already moving on to the next adventure.
I stood up, dusting gravel from my knees, and nodded once at Rawley. I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t have formed the words if I’d tried. But the word “stay” landed somewhere in my chest and stuck there, a physical weight I could feel with each breath.
I hadn’t known, until just this moment, how badly I needed to hear it.