Chapter 13
Lena
This is real.
This is actually happening.
All these years of fantasizing about him, about his hands on me, his mouth claiming mine, the low gravel of his voice whispering my name in the dark. They’re no longer just late-night dreams I have to force myself to forget in the morning.
And he’s kissing me like he’s seconds from falling apart.
The second his lips crashed into mine, the world blurred. My doubts, my guilt, my brother’s voice in the back of my mind all burned away in a flash of heat and need.
I’ve imagined this moment a thousand times. His taste, sharp and addictive. His touch, rough and possessive. The way his scent would wrap around me. Whiskey, cedar, and that uniquely Declan smell that’s always made my head spin.
But nothing could’ve prepared me for the way it all feels in real life.
It’s a wildfire, igniting inside me, raging through every nerve ending. I feel it in my fingertips, in the tightening of my belly, in the ache low in my body that’s been his since the first time he looked at me like I was more than just his best friend’s little sister.
His hands are everywhere, urgent and desperate, pulling me closer like he needs me to breathe. And I go willingly, wrapping myself around him like I’ve waited my whole damn life to be here.
Because I have.
I tilt my head, deepening the kiss, chasing his mouth like I can’t get enough. Because I can’t. His lips are soft but commanding, and when our tongues touch again, I swear something inside me breaks wide open.
It’s raw. Intense. Almost too much.
Almost.
He pushes me harder against the wall, and I gasp, the sound muffled by his mouth. My fingers dig into the back of his shirt, needing an anchor as the world spins.
I want to tell him I’m his. I want to say it out loud, even if it wrecks everything.
Because it’s never been anyone else for me.
Only him.
And now that I finally have a taste, I know I’ll never be able to walk away.
It was nearly impossible before, when all I had were fantasies and stolen glances, but now? Now there’s no doubt. It’s impossible.
Declan’s lips pull from mine, only to trail fire down my jaw and neck. Kissing. Sucking. Biting. Each sensation is sharper than the last, sending a jolt of pleasure straight through me.
My back arches off the wall, my legs trembling beneath me. I grab his shoulders like he’s the only thing keeping me in this reality, because the way he’s touching me, the way his mouth worships my skin, I feel like I might fly apart.
I’ve never been this turned on in my life.
Every inch of me is alive, flushed with need. My skin is hot and sensitive. My nipples are stiff, scraping against the inside of my bra with every movement, and my pussy isn’t just wet, it’s throbbing. An ache that pulses deeper with every brush of his hands, every graze of his mouth.
Then his knee presses between my thighs, right where I need it most, and I cry out.
“Oh fuck!”
My head hits the wall as it drops back, overwhelmed by the rush of pleasure crashing through me.
He grinds his thigh against my center, slow but deliberate, and I gasp again, louder this time.
“You need relief, don’t you?”
His voice is low and rough in my ear, soaked in desire and edged with control.
I can’t find words. I can barely breathe. All I can do is moan softly, digging my nails into his shoulders like I’m trying to hold on to something real.
His mouth moves up to my ear, and when he bites the lobe, I whimper. He soothes the sting with a soft lick, and my body shudders in his arms.
“Tell me, Lena.” His voice is pure gravel. “Tell me you’re in as much pain as I am. That you don’t just want relief, you need it. Because fuck, I sure as hell do.”
My eyes flutter open, barely focusing, and though he’s not looking at me, still consumed with my neck, my skin, every exposed part of me, I find my voice, shaky but sure.
“Yes, Declan,” I whisper, breathless and wrecked. “I need relief. Please…”
That’s all it takes.
He lets out an animalistic growl and grabs the hem of my shirt, yanking it over my head and tossing it behind him without a second thought.
There’s no hesitation, no second-guessing. His hands are already at my waistband, and in one fluid move, he’s pushing my pants down, fingers grazing over my hips, my thighs, as I kick them away.
I’m standing in front of him in nothing but a lace bra and panties.
And I’ve never felt so exposed or so alive.
His eyes finally lift, sweeping over me like I’m something he’s been starving for. My breath catches, my heart pounding.
Because this isn’t just about sex.
It’s everything we’ve been trying not to feel, laid bare in the space between our bodies.
Declan’s eyes roam over me, dark and wild, his jaw clenched like he’s barely holding it together.
And God, the way he looks at me like I’m something sacred and sinful all at once makes my knees weak.
His hands slide up my thighs, slow and reverent, thumbs brushing the crease where my legs meet my hips, and I gasp.
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he murmurs, more to himself than to me.
His fingers skim up my sides, over my ribs, stopping just below my bra. I can feel the tremble in his hands, the war between restraint and desperation.
“Declan…” My voice is a breath, a plea.
He meets my eyes then, and what I see there steals the rest of my oxygen.
Hunger.
Need.
But also fear.
Not of me, but of what this means. What it breaks.
Still, he doesn’t stop.
He slides one strap of my bra off my shoulder, then the other, his fingers lingering against my skin. He reaches around and unclasps it, the fabric falling away between us.
The air hits my bare skin, and I tense, just for a second, but his eyes soften. His gaze drops to my chest, and he exhales like he’s witnessing something holy.
“Fuck, Lena,” he breathes, cupping my breasts in his hands. His thumbs graze over my nipples, and I cry out, my head falling forward into his chest.
He catches me, one hand moving to the small of my back as he guides me closer, grinding his thigh up against me again.
“I want to memorize every sound you make,” he whispers into my hair, “every way your body moves when I touch you.”
His mouth closes over my nipple, sucking it into his mouth while his hand rolls the other, and I lose all sense of time.
I moan, loud and unfiltered, grinding against his thigh, desperate for more friction. More of him.
“I’ve wanted this,” I pant, dragging my hands down his back, under his shirt. “I’ve needed this.”
He pulls back just enough to look me in the eyes, his breathing harsh, ragged.
“Then take it,” he says, voice rough as gravel. “Take all of me, Lena.”
I know he means it.
This isn’t just giving in.
It’s surrender.
He drops to his knees and pulls my black lace panties down with him. Before I have time to even savior the image of Declan on his knees in front of me, his mouth covers my pussy.
“Oh my God, yes!”
I don’t know if it’s my words or if he just loses totally control, but he attacks my pussy like a starving man who has just found food.
He’s kissing, sucking, and biting. Hard and fast.
I have no restraint as I rub my pussy against him, needing to feel more.
His tongue lashes out against my sensitive clit and I see stars.
“Declan!” I shout, fisting his hair in my hands.
He doesn’t slow his pace, he actually picks up speed. I didn’t think it was possible for someone to have such a talented mouth, but I was wrong. He’s pulling me to the edge so fast, and there’s no way to stop the building in my body.
His warm breath blows against me as his tongue unleashes frantically, causing me to moan uncontrollably. I’ve never had anyone worship my pussy the way he is. It’s hard, fast, and deliberate.
He sucks on my clit just as he slams two fingers inside my wet pussy.
“Fuck! Oh, Declan, I’m not going to be able to hold on. It feels so good, so fucking good.”
He growls against me, sending a shot through my body. His fingers fuck me as he sucks harder on my clit and that’s it, it’s my undoing.
I explode, falling off the edge as wave after wave washes over me.
“Oh my God!” I whisper through my moans.
My legs are shaking as I pull on his hair while he licks at me, taking everything from me.
Not just the most intense orgasm I’ve ever experienced, but my goddamn heart and soul.
My breathing is heavy when he finally pulls away and looks up at me. His mouth is glistening, and unbelievably, my body starts to heat up again.
“You taste even better than I imagined you would. That was fucking hot, Lena.” He presses soft kisses on my inner thighs, moving slowly up my body, dropping kisses on my overheated skin along the way.
Once he’s to his feet again, he crashes his lips to mine, allowing me to taste myself on his tongue.
A soft moan escapes me, and I feel him smile against my lips. It’s cocky and sexy all at once.
He pulls away, and our eyes lock as his fingers sink into my hair. “I need you, Lena. I need to be buried deep inside that tight pussy.”
I bite my lip as I push his cut off, watching it drop to the floor.
I gather the soft fabric of his shirt in my hands and yank it over his head.
I’ve seen him shirtless before, but this is different.
I’m allowed to look. I’m allowed to appreciate the Adonis he is.
His muscular body that flexes with each move he makes, allowing his tattoos the perfect canvas.
My hands explore him, tracing each line and ripple, trying to memorize the feel of his warm skin against my fingers. He allows me. He watches me carefully as I lose myself in the way he feels, the way his breathing is picking up, and the soft growl that escapes him.
I glance up, and his eyes are dark and full of desire.
My fingers trail down to his waist, unbuttoning his jeans and pushing them down his legs. He kicks them aside and I begin to sink down, wanting to give him the pleasure he just gave me.
But, he catches me under my arms, stopping me and lifting me back up.
“Believe me, Lena, I want to fuck your mouth and I will. But not now. Right now, I need to be inside you. I need to feel your body against mine. I need to unleash this pent-up want. I need to fuck you.”
So hot.
So dirty.
So controlling.
And I fucking love it.
“Take me, Declan. Do want you need, what we both need,” I whisper, running my hand down his cheek.
He pushes his boxers off, and as I look down, my eyes widen.
Yes, he’s big, but it’s not his size that surprises me. It’s the piercing I see.
“You’re pierced?” I don’t know why it comes out as a question because I clearly see he is.
His hands grab my hips and he pulls me against him, rubbing his cock between my wet folds.
“I am, and I promise you, you’re going to appreciate it as much as I do.” He’s voice is rough as his fingers dig into my hips.
He briefly breaks all contact and grabs his jeans. My brows dip in confusion, but when he stands up with a condom in his hand, my heart races.
He doesn’t say anything but locks his eyes with mine as he uses his teeth to rip open the condom. It’s incredibly hot, and I find myself wetting my lips as I watch.
“Roll it on me,” he demands, holding the condom out for me.
I take the condom from him and wrap my hand around the tip of his dick. He shudders at my touch as he groans. I slide my hand down the length of him and hold on while I use my other hand to roll the condom on.
“Fuck, Lena,” he hisses as his eyes close for a brief moment.
Once the condom is on, no time is wasted. He grabs me, lifting me effortlessly, and slams into me. We both let out a sigh of almost relief as he stills.
“Fuck, you’re gripping me like a vice,” he moans, digging his fingers into my ass.
“Move, Declan. I need you to move.”
As if something clicks or maybe snaps, he begins to move. It’s hard, fast, and raw. Everything we’ve buried over the years boils over.
The want.
The need.
The desire.
It’s all there.
We both let go, allowing for the first time to take what we’ve been denying.
“Lena, fuck, you feel so good. So damn good, baby.”
Baby.
The nickname heats my skin and brings tears to my eyes.
He told me once, years ago, he’ll never call anyone baby, not unless he intends on keeping them.
The emotions are quickly overshadowed by the way my body is reacting to his.
The way his body is pressed against mine. His skin soft, yet solid.
The way his lips feel as he sucks on the soft flesh on my neck.
The way he moans against me sending chills down my body.
And the way his pierced cock fills me, fucking me like he’s been trained to do it so perfectly. To know exactly how fast, hard, and deep to go. How to continuously hit the same spot that has me seeing stars.
It’s so fucking hot.
“Declan, I’m not going to last long,” I cry out, my nails digging into his back.
“Don’t fight it. Give me your release, Lena. Give me what I fucking need.”
He drives into me over and over. My body rubbing against his as he moves with such force, such skill.
It’s building. My body is beginning to shake as the feeling begins to wash over me. He’s ripping it from me, and there’s no way to stop it. No way to make this last, because he’s fucking me like he owes me.
And maybe he does.
“Reach down and rub your clit, Lena,” he demands, slamming into me.
I do what he says and the second my fingers touch my sensitive clit, I shout.
“Good girl, rub that clit. Come on me, Lena.”
Maybe it’s because I was almost right there, or maybe his words push me over the edge, but I fall. I fall hard and fast, exploding around him.
Just like he demanded.
“Declan!” I moan, dropping my head onto his shoulder.
“Yes, Lena. Fuck, yes. I’m right behind you. I’ve fought it for too long,” he says, groaning as he continues slamming into me.
“Oh, Declan, let go,” I whisper, kissing his chest.
I feel him tense, and then he lets out a growl that echoes around us. “Fuck, Lena.”
He pumps into me until he has nothing left.
We’re both breathing heavily, holding onto each other like we’re scared to let go.
Declan finally pulls back and we look at each other.
“This was fucking everything.”
“It was,” i agree.
“I can’t let you go, Lena. Not now.”
“I’m not asking you to. I’ve never asked you to.”
He kisses me and it’s nothing like before. It’s slow and soft. Almost sweet. It feels like he’s trying to tell me something without words.
And damn, I think I understand.