Chapter 8
Chapter Eight
CYRUS
Golden rays filter through the window, blinding me before I can even open my eyes.
Heat envelops my side, an uncomfortable pressurised heat, burning me up from the inside out. When I try moving a heaviness stops me.
Where the fuck am I?
Popping my eyes open, I take in the bright room around me. Until I come to the point of heat and weight. Seeing her plastered to the side of me should calm me down. Yet it has the opposite effect.
Fear and panic bubble in my gut.
She distracted me. I slept with her. She tied me up. Then I fell asleep.
I’m still in bed with Tally.
Fuck.
She’s pinned herself to my side, her head on my shoulder and my arm wrapped around her. Both of us still naked. She has a serene smile on her face, looking at peace whilst panic grips my chest.
My heart feels like it's beating out my chest and blood rushes in my ears. Lungs capsizing in my chest as I choke on my own saliva. I shouldn’t have done this.
My Captain is downstairs, who’s unlikely to be awake or possibly even alive.
A whole crew is relying on me to take over from her.
But I’m here, not doing my duty. Letting everyone down.
Again.
Hardening my features, although no one’s here to see me freak out. I let the war rage on inside me as I slide out from underneath her.
Sitting up with my back to Tally, I take deep breaths.
Then I’m getting dressed and getting on with my duties. Like I should have been all this time.
First, I make a point of seeking out the room Amara has been taken too.
She was still asleep with Mabel passed out in the chair next to her bed. With Mabel still covered in blood and smelling of gun powder. I’d let her rest then head back later and offer to take over.
For Amara it's the least I can do.
But for now I’ll head to the ship and continue my duties there.
Jumping on the back of a horse. The mare's brown mottled coat glinting with the sunlight. Grabbing the reins and pressing in my heels, we belt it down the thoroughfare towards the dock. It isn’t far, easy enough to walk, I just want to get as far away from the inn as soon as possible.
In the distance, smoke still curls along the horizon.
The smell of brimstone filters through the air and the closer I get to the ship the more the contamination of blood and guts mix with it.
Smells I’ve unfortunately gotten used to over the years.
When the ship comes into view I refuse to let a grimace take over, keeping my neutral expression in place. Not once letting anyone see beneath the facade.
Except you let Tally see beneath it yesterday.
Mentally shaking myself, I take in the sight before me.
Broken and splintered wood, singed sails, thick red caked throughout the planks. Stray pieces of guts and limbs strewn across railings and beams.
In short, its a fucking mess.
With a deep sigh, I dismount and tie up the horse before climbing up the gangplank. I need to witness this chaos and devastation first hand before commencing on clean up.
Jude’s waiting up on the top deck, a grimace plastered on her face. “Cyrus.”
With a nod I reply, “Jude.”
Together we look over the ship. “It’s a fucking dump, isn’t it?”
I sigh, long and hard. “Get any crew that aren’t injured up here. We’ll remove the bodies first, then split the crew to deal with the blood and the damaged wood and repairs.”
“It’s going to be a bitch to fix. This whole deck is going to need pulling up and re-laying, this blood is too soaked in.
And thick.” Jude flings her hands around as if I can’t see the blood soaked wood directly in front of me.
And behind me. And under me. “And you’ll need to talk to Tally about where to put the bodies.
There’s so many, we can’t dig that many graves. We’ll have to have a mass burn up.”
My spine stiffens at the mention of Tally’s name.
Fuck.
Having to talk to her will be torturous after last night. I can’t believe I fucked myself over like this. There’s a reason I don’t fuck about with people, why I don’t let people see behind the carefully curated walls I’ve built. I can’t do the jobs that are required of me when I do.
Panic is radiating beneath my skin, but from the outside you wouldn’t know.
I’ve had too many years of practicing hiding my emotions and feelings.
From the moment my village went up in flames, I had to be the one to protect those around me.
To not let on that panic is my basic setting.
Throughout years of practice I’ve been able to become a statue, allowing no one to see behind the facade. I’ve become perfect at this game.
Yet these last however many hours have put this perfection into ruin.
Fuck it all.
“Let’s just get this goddamn mess cleaned up.”