17. Sonya
17
SONYA
I closed my eyes as I relaxed against Ben’s warm chest. This hard wall of muscles was already so familiar, which seemed bizarre with how crazy my life was lately.
I’d told myself now wasn’t the time for sex or distractions. I was devoted, stubbornly devoted to the goal of getting back to whatever remained of my family. But I hadn’t yet accepted that I now had another family of my own making, my baby in my belly and his or her father lying with me.
His cum was drying on my thigh because I’d caved once again.
“Is Ben even your name?”
A grunt was his reply. Or maybe that was a laugh. It seemed that he thought I was asleep and hadn’t been expecting me to talk.
“Yes. My name is Ben.”
I shifted so I could face his rugged, bearded face. Peering at him, I tried to understand how my body and heart could recognize him as someone who could help me, who could care to protect me and pleasure me, but I had no clue who the hell he actually was.
He opened his mouth to speak, breaking under the pressure of the silence first, but I covered his lips with my fingers.
“Are you kidnapping me?”
He frowned. “After what we just did, you still have to ask?” He used the sheet to wipe the cum on my leg.
“I have been captive too long, and I refuse to be in that position again.”
He opened his mouth to speak and I covered it again. But this time, he dodged my hand and urged me to get up with him.
“You know more about me than I do you. I know nothing, Ben. Not who you are. How we ran into each other again. How you knew to save me and—” I drew in a quick breath, not ready to ramble this quickly.
Holding his hand, I admired his ass as he led me from the bed and to a small bathroom.
“I have been told nothing for eleven years. I haven’t had access to anyone. No phone, no TV, no devices to keep me aware of anything happening outside the room I was kept in. So I am in the dark more than you could be.”
He started a shower, watching me as he turned the faucets. Then without a word, he got into the steamy stall with me.
“My name is Ben. Ben Warner.”
I narrowed my eyes at him as he hugged me close. Water streamed over us, soothing me. “Warner? I heard you curse in Russian at that strip club.”
“I lived in Russia until my mother brought me to the States. I’m a contractor.”
“An assassin?” I guessed. No man could shoot that many dead with ease like he did without experience in murdering before.
He nodded. “I’m an independent contractor.” He shrugged, then slicked the water off his hair. “Until now. Maybe.”
That needed more explanation, but later. “How did you find me?”
“The first time, I didn’t. You did. You found me at that bar. I saw you come in and scan the crowd. You came to me.”
I nodded.
“Why?”
“I told you. I wanted to lose my virginity. You were a stranger who caught my eye, and that was that.”
He peered at me for a long moment, seeming to search for his next words. We were both so guarded, tiptoeing around each other verbally in what had to be the oddest connection. Steam swirled around us, calming me, but I remained tense and eager to hear what he’d say next.
“I was in that area to kill an Ilyin guard. And then there you were.”
“Go on.”
He arched a brow, not wanting to divulge too much and still expecting me to fill in some blanks. “Go on to what? You took off and I never saw you until that night at the strip club.”
“Why were you there?”
He began washing my hair gently, worrying me that he wouldn’t reply.
“I was following a target,” he said as I shivered under the caress of his fingers on my scalp. “I’ve done hits for all the Mafia families as an independent. I’d killed for the Cartels and gangs too. But lately, I’ve been on jobs near you.”
I narrowed my eyes. “So I’m supposed to believe we just happened to be near each other? It was a coincidence to run into you there?”
“Yes.” He ceased the heavenly massage on my head that I wanted to moan at. Rinsing my hair felt just as good.
“And no. I heard about you in passing. When I heard your name, I wondered if those people could be talking about you, the virgin I couldn’t stop thinking about. The sexy woman I wanted again.”
He kissed me deeply then stepped back to grab a loofah and soap to wash me.
I refused to melt under his sweet words and tender touches. I had to stay focused before I’d let myself relax. “Who was talking about me?”
“Igor Petrov and Geoff Ilyin. They were discussing how they wanted to end the Baranov family and power.”
I growled. Our rivals would plot the Baranov demise. I didn’t doubt that for a second. “What do you mean, they want to end us?” It felt good not to have to pretend I wasn’t a Mafia princess around him, that I wasn’t Sonya Baranov. “We are done.”
He furrowed his brow at me, washing me.
“My father was killed?—”
“Wait. How did you hear about Boris dying? That happened recently. If you weren’t told anything in years?—”
“I overheard the guards outside my room speaking. That’s why I had to escape. I can’t let my family be diminished to nothing. I can’t let Eva be vulnerable and alone without anyone to protect her. My mother was killed years ago. Uncle Oleg has been gone for so long too. It’s just me trying to get back to Eva and…”
He’d started to slowly shake his head in the middle of my ramble.
“What?” I asked, my heart racing. Deep down in my gut, I just knew he was about to say something that would shock me and rattle me further than I already was. The moment had come. I’d finally get some intel about what remained of the Baranov legacy.
“That’s not true.”
“What isn’t?” I asked, daring to hope.
“Boris died of a stroke, they think. A natural cause. He was not killed by another.”
“Can anyone confirm that?” I asked. My father was a useless alcoholic, but I assumed he’d been forced to clean up after Uncle Oleg died. Wanting the boss of the Baranovs dead would be a prime goal for the Petrovs or Ilyins, or any other syndicated crime organization.
“No one knows what happened to your mother, but?—”
It was my turn to shake my head. I did so sadly, lowering my gaze. “ I know. I can confirm that she was killed. She was taken with me, raped and abused countless times. When they wanted to—” I swallowed, forcing my throat to work past the clogged emotions threatening to choke me. “They wanted to rape me, even though I had to remain pure. Not to take my virginity but…”
He cursed, pulling me into a hug and keeping me in a crushing hug. The injuries from the beating ached more under his tight hold, but it also secured me. I closed my eyes and let the familiarity of his hard body soothe my soul.
“They wanted to rape me there. To fuck my ass. She fought them, begging them not to hurt me at all. So they raped her in my place, to teach her a lesson. To teach me a lesson. While they did it, she took a knife off them and got it to me, and I attacked.”
His big hand roved up and down my back, comforting me. Years of therapy would help me get over this trauma, but right now, like this, I felt freer to open up to this man.
“I nearly killed one. But they didn’t retaliate and hurt me. They forced me to watch them kill her. And defile her more. It got the attention of the guards’ supervisor, though, and because he knew how much I was worth, he prevented anyone from trying to rape me in any way after that. But I saw with my own eyes the moment my mother died, trying to protect me.”
We stood, steaming in the shower with the silence surrounding us. If only the water could rinse away my memories of that fateful day years ago.
“You said that wasn’t true,” I reminded him once I felt calmer and steadier to resume our conversation again. “That Eva isn’t alone.”
“Because she’s not. Oleg lives.”
I jerked up to face him. “He does?”
He furrowed his brow again. “Why would you think otherwise?”
“Again, because I heard the guards talking. Maybe I didn’t get the whole story, but they seemed to make it sound like Oleg had been killed.”
“No. He’s alive. Well, yeah, he’s alive.”
“Huh?” His doubt about stating that bothered me. “Is he or isn’t he?”
“Yes, he’s alive, but he’s suffered a heart attack recently. He’s been stressed looking for you , apparently. There have been mixed feelings within your family about whether you lived, had been killed, or had run away when you disappeared, but?—”
“ Run away ?” I gaped at him. “I would never. I have never lost hope that I could return to my family.”
He kissed my brow. “Lev hired me to kill someone, but when I mentioned to him what I’d heard about you and the plans to bring down the Baranov name, he said he would hire me to find you after I finished my hit. Oleg had been searching for you for years to no avail, and they have not given up hope, even while Oleg is unable to lead.”
I blinked, stunned and overwhelmed by all this news. I would need a lot more time to digest all of this, but I concentrated on this new hope and joy blooming in my chest.
“Uncle Oleg is alive,” I repeated.
It was surreal to be able to think that, let alone say it. Adjusting all the visions I had of my uncle being gone would take time, but I wanted to welcome this shocking twist.
Alive! Not dead!
“He is alive. He’s currently in a coma and under constant care, but his prognosis is positive.”
“Eva isn’t alone and unprotected.” I gazed up at Ben, thrilled. I didn’t try to hide the smile on my lips. For once in a long, long time, I felt free to express happiness.
“No. She never was while you were gone. Oleg was there. So was Boris, even if he did nothing. And as of a month ago, she has Lev as a husband, too.”
My jaw would hit the floor at this rate. “Eva married Lev ? The Baranov soldier Uncle Oleg took in?”
He nodded. “He’s more or less Oleg’s right-hand man now.”
“Eva wanted to marry him?”
He chuckled, a rich, deep sound I wanted to hear more often.
“Yes. They chose each other in marriage. Oleg asked him to be her bodyguard while she attended college and?—”
“Wait.” I grinned wider. “Eva went to college?” How bold of her.
“Yeah. And after that experience, um, they… wanted to be together.”
I sighed happily. “My father didn’t try to use her in an arranged marriage?”
“No. Boris wouldn’t have had any say in that decision. Oleg has called the shots, and it seemed he had no interest in an arranged marriage to gain or hold on to an alliance or power. I once heard Rurik say Oleg preferred to orchestrate alliances and power on his own, not through a marriage.”
That actually did sound like my uncle. He was always so stubborn and autocratic like that.
“I saw Lev and Eva at their wedding. I wasn’t a guest, but I wanted to watch them all and get a better feeling for the members at the top of the Baranov family. So I snuck in.”
I couldn’t help a laugh. “You spied on them at their wedding?”
He almost smiled. Maybe it was too grave of a thing to joke about because he sobered quickly. “I did. In my position, I need all the intel and facts that I can get before I act on a job or contract. I prefer to be knowledgeable and form my own opinions and make my independent choices about whom I work with or for. I’ve never formed a loyalty to any one group, not since I left the military. It’s why I’ve been determined to find you myself—before I handled the hit that Lev wants done.”
“And Eva is happy?”
He nodded. “For all intents and purposes, and as far as I could witness, she looks like a happy bride, a willing bride, and a woman very much in love with her new husband.”
I sighed again, unable to stop letting out all the pent-up worries that my sister could be alone and targeted. Ben noticed my relief, hugging me close, and we finished rinsing off.
“The mood changed pretty quickly when Boris fell over, but?—”
I gasped. “He died at her wedding?”
He nodded. “He did. She and Lev didn’t seem surprised, but they’ve taken it in stride.”
Finished with the shower, we got out. Ben steadied me as I stepped onto the mat, then he dried us both off, still speaking. “Lev respected that Oleg wouldn’t stop looking for you. Like I said, he planned to hire me to track you down, but I couldn’t ignore this hunch that you were closer than anyone realized.”
I shook my head, watching him and wondering how I’d ever lucked out to have him in my life. “Not until recently, when I escaped.”
“I wanted to find you because I couldn’t forget you, Sonya. It wasn’t just a duty. It wasn’t just a job. Every time I thought about you, I missed you. I can’t explain it. I won’t try to justify it. It’s just what I felt. But when Lev hinted at hiring me to locate you, it was all I could think about.”
Taking the initiative, I leaned up to kiss him, slow and soft. I hoped that I showed how much his admission mattered to me.
“I never forgot you either.”
He lowered his hand to my stomach, chuckling lightly again. “Well, I doubt you could. Because I left a little something behind for you to remember me by.”
“True.” Dazed and so relieved with this good news about my family, I felt dragged down and even more tired than before. The high of relief, the bliss of coming, and then the heat of the shower. All this promising news. I was on cloud nine, floating and hopeful, and it wore me out.
When I yawned again, he smiled and guided me back toward the bed. First, he flung the messed up top sheet off, then he urged me to get under the covers. “Tired?”
“All the time.”
“Relax, Sonya. You’re safe here.”
I would never tire of his saying that. Because I believed it.
For the first time in years, I felt how secure I could be.
“We still have a lot to discuss,” he added as he dimmed the lights, waiting for me to settle in.
I nodded, already closing my eyes. “Yeah. We do.”
The baby. Us. My family. My captivity. His hit. The future.
I smiled wide as he joined me, spooning me. Everything was changing so fast. But I relished the idea that I could actually look forward to the future for once—that I had a future waiting for me that didn’t include being forced into a marriage I didn’t want.