Chapter 26 #2
But I also understand it now. And understanding it makes me love him more. The feeling builds inside me, too big to hold, too sharp to swallow down like I always do. It climbs up my throat with every breath, every movement, every quiet sound he makes.
His breathing grows uneven as the pace builds, and I feel the way he holds himself together, the way he’s trying not to rush even though his body clearly wants to. His thumb works harder against my clit, guided by the movement of my hips.
“You feel so good,” he murmurs, voice rougher now. “I didn’t know it could feel like this.”
I sit up on him again and catch his mouth in a messy kiss, and the words tear out of me before I can stop them.
“I love you,” I gasp, the confession spilling free and reckless and real as I sway my hips over him now. “I love you so much, Theo.”
The words are raw. Unfiltered. True. He stills for half a heartbeat, like the confession hit him straight in the chest.
Then he makes a sound I’ll never forget.
His arms tighten around me, his forehead dropping to my shoulder as if he needs the contact to stay upright, and when he moves again, it’s with everything he has left, like he’s answering me without words.
Like he’s saying I’m yours without daring to speak it out loud.
We move in sync, my walls clenching around him as I get closer and closer to my orgasm.
The tension breaks, not all at once, but in waves, his body and mine giving in piece by piece until he finally lets himself have the moment fully with a groan that vibrates through my body and settles deep in my heart.
He shoots inside me and I moan loud and high as I orgasm with him, clenching every last drop of him inside me.
Knowing I take my birth control religiously and I'm nowhere near my ovulation date, I have no worries. Only enjoying the moment, the full feeling he leaves me with.
He clings to me for a heartbeat, breath hot and uneven, like he’s holding on to the only thing keeping him here.
And I hold him right back. We stay like that for a while afterward.
No rush. No words. Just breathing. I feel him growing soft inside me, but I don't want to move.
I don't want to lose the feeling of him in me.
Eventually, he eases me off him and guides us down onto the bed, pulling me with him, arms wrapping around me like he’s making sure I don’t drift away.
I trace slow patterns over his chest and let my eyes close, content to just be here.
To be what he needs tonight. To listen to the steady rhythm of his heart.
He presses a kiss to my temple, softer now, calmer. Settled. Whatever’s weighing on him, whatever he’s not ready to tell me yet, I want to hear it. I want to be there for him. Just like he's always there for me.
My mind wanders, landing on him being stressed about Bash and the money we have to come up with. Guilt consumes me whole, deep in my stomach. The last thing I want is to make life harder on him.
The guilt sits heavy in my stomach, sour and sharp, and I can’t keep it there anymore.
“I’m sorry.” I trace the steady rise and fall of his chest with my fingers. “I know this is about Bash.”
His eyes go wide. Not enough that someone else would clock it, but enough that I do. Enough that something instinctive flares in my chest, like I just brushed against a wire I wasn’t supposed to touch.
For half a second, he looks like I’ve caught him mid-thought.
“What do you mean?” he asks, too quickly.
I hesitate, suddenly aware of how carefully he’s watching me now. Like he’s waiting for my next words to either confirm or undo something.
“The debt,” I answer slowly, suddenly curious about what he’s thinking. “Everything tied to him. It’s heavy. And you’re carrying it like it’s yours when it’s not.”
I shift onto my side, propping myself up on my elbow so I can see him better. “You shouldn’t be holding all of that. Especially not for me.”
Something changes in him. I watch it happen. The tension that had snapped tight through his shoulders eases. His jaw unclenches. His breath leaves him in a way that feels almost… relieved. Like what I said wasn’t what he was expecting.
“Oh,” he whispers, pushing himself up to sit. “That’s… not—” He stops himself, then shakes his head. “It’s not about Bash.”
I frown, growing more concerned, and if I’m being honest, a little suspicious. “It’s not?”
“No.” His answer is immediate. Too immediate. “I mean, not like that.”
That doesn’t clarify anything, but the moment has already passed. Whatever he thought I knew, whatever fear flashed through him, it’s gone now, filed away and replaced with something steadier.
I push myself up, sitting up with him. The moment I do, he reaches for my hand, thumb brushing slow circles over my knuckles.
“I don’t regret being here for you,” he promises, voice low and certain. “Not for a second.”
“That’s not what I was saying.”
“I know.” His gaze holds mine, unwavering. “But I want you to hear it anyway.”
My chest tightens.
“I don’t regret getting involved,” he continues. “I don’t regret the stress or the mess or any of it. If there’s weight to carry, I’ll take it. All of it.”
Theo's forehead presses briefly to my shoulder again like he needs the contact to ground himself.
“I’ll take the sickness,” he murmurs. “The stress. The fallout. Anything that comes with it, if it means you don’t have to.”
Something cold slides down my spine. That sounds a lot like a promise. That sounds a lot like a man who’s already decided something and isn’t planning on backing out.
I swallow. “You say that like you owe me something when you don't.”
He exhales against my skin. “I’m saying it because it’s true.”
“Don't do anything stupid for my sake.”
He pulls back just enough to look at me, eyes earnest and unflinching. “I’m not. At least not right now.”
That should comfort me. But there’s something in the way he says it that twists uneasily in my gut.
“I don’t love how that sounds,” I admit.
He smiles faintly. “Yeah. Me neither.”
He stands then, grabbing his clothes, and I instantly miss his warmth beside me. Whatever he came here to steady himself for, it worked.
“I have to go.” The words tear at me despite his gentle tone.
I’m not ready for him to go.
I frown, unable to hold it back. “Really? Already?”
“Sorry,” he pauses after pulling his pants on, holding my gaze with his soft eyes. “Trust me. If I could, I'd spend the entire day with you. More than the day really.”
You have more of a silver tongue than you think, Theo.
“I’ll come see you tomorrow,” he offers as he drags his shirt over his head.
“I’ll hold you to it,” I mutter, still a bit disappointed.
I have to get ready for my fight tonight anyway.
He pauses at the door, looking back at me. “I don’t regret anything that involves helping you. Any of it.”
That, more than anything else, makes my stomach sink. Because I’m starting to think he's about to do something really fucking stupid.
But he's Theo. Theo is smart. He won't do anything life-altering, right?