CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE #2
There were probably a lot of people smarter than Graham who could answer, but in the end, they’d probably never know.
And honestly, Graham didn’t want Thad to be anyone else. He loved Thad exactly the way he was.
Thad awoke the following morning to the drag of a wet tongue across his cheek. He wrinkled his nose. “Fuck, Graham, what are you doing?” he muttered, shoving him away, disgusted by the act and his morning breath.
But rather than his hand meeting warm flesh, it met … fur?
He cracked one eye open and was greeted by the sight of Murphy, his tongue hanging out as he happily wagged his tail.
“Ugh. Gross,” Thad muttered, grabbing the corner of the sheet and swiping it across his face to mop up the excess saliva. That explained the bad breath at least.
And then it hit him he’d woken up.
He’d woken up in Graham’s bed and holy fuck he’d slept through the night.
He sat up, his heart racing.
He hadn’t even been trying to sleep over.
Thad had been so tired he’d debated even going to Graham’s place at all following the game. It had been a weird fucking night, with Bobby’s bullshit, then Gavin’s confession to the team.
But Graham had given him a hopeful little look and said after a night like that, they both needed the comfort of being together.
And well, Thad had a hard time arguing.
Honestly, he’d figured he wouldn’t even sleep. But he’d been wrong. Very wrong, apparently.
He’d passed out after sex and had apparently slept hard until morning.
He glanced over at the other side of the bed to see if Graham was awake, but it was empty.
Thad laughed a little. That was quite the role reversal. Usually, it was Graham waking up here alone. But where was he?
A moment later, Thad heard the quiet snick of a door latch and turned his head in time to see Graham step out of the bathroom, wearing a pair of boxer briefs and yawning.
“Were you talking to me?” he asked, still sounding like he was still half-asleep.
“Yeah. I woke up to someone licking me. Thought it was you.” Thad winked and settled back against the pillows.
Graham laughed. “I don’t know if I should be offended or flattered.”
“Offended. Your dog has some heinous breath.”
“Well, I brushed,” Graham said, crawling onto the bed and straddling Thad’s thighs. “So I can do this.”
He bent down, bracing one hand on the bed and grazing his lips across Thad’s in a chaste kiss.
“I didn’t brush,” Thad pointed out after he drew back. “You want me to get up and take care of that?”
Graham shrugged. “Nah. If I can handle Murphy, I can handle you.”
Thad reached up and squeezed Graham’s thighs. “You better not be kissing your dog the way you kiss me.”
“I don’t kiss anyone the way I kiss you,” Graham said with a laugh. “Human or canine.”
“Good.” Thad slid his fingers up under the edges of Graham’s underwear. “Now, how about you demonstrate?”
“I will,” Graham said, but rather than lean in, he sat up.
Thad frowned. That was sort of the opposite of what he’d been going for here.
“So, you slept over. All night,” Graham said in this weirdly casual tone like he was trying not to make a big deal about it.
It was a big deal though, Thad admitted to himself.
“I did,” he said aloud.
“Any idea why?” Graham smoothed his hands over Thad’s midsection, idly tracing the lines of his abdominal muscles in a way that made Thad want to tighten them to show off.
He resisted, mostly because he wasn’t sure he could do that and come up with a response to Graham at the same time.
It wasn’t an easy question to answer.
“I think it could be a lot of things,” Thad said slowly. “I think being out to most of the people who matter—minus your family—has helped.”
Graham nodded.
“Being tired as fuck last night didn’t hurt,” Thad said.
Graham poked him in the side. Thad stifled a yelp and grabbed his hand, threading their fingers together. “Don’t deflect.”
“I think the biggest thing might be because now I know you have my back,” he admitted, looking Graham in the eye.
Graham frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I mean …” Thad swallowed hard. “One of the most difficult and damaging things about being in prison—at least for me—was constantly being on alert. I couldn’t relax. I always had to watch my back.”
“And Teddy’s,” Graham said.
Thad nodded. “And Teddy’s. I never could let down my guard. I was always braced for something to happen. It’s not even the big shit, necessarily. Not the guard messing with you or the guy a few cells over who’s trying to start something. It’s …”
He took a moment, trying to get his thoughts in order.
“Even in my cell, even while I slept, I could get woken up by some guard. Sometimes they pulled some bullshit like waking us up to inspect our cells for contraband. Hell, guys even got transferred to different facilities in the middle of the night.”
“That’s fucking awful,” Graham said.
“Can’t say I was a fan,” Thad agreed. “But that kind of thing, it means you can never fully relax. You’re always on edge, waiting for something to happen. It’s rare I get more than a few hours of sleep at a time. And, never with someone else in the room with me.”
Because while he’d liked Teddy, thought he was a good guy, he’d never been one-hundred-percent sure Teddy wouldn’t dick him over if it meant saving his own skin or protecting what little control and autonomy he had.
Thad couldn’t even blame Teddy. The prison system fostered that attitude. They were all doing their best to get by with the deck stacked against them.
“But you did sleep through the night,” Graham whispered, looking at him with this mixture of awe and bewilderment. “Last night you trusted me enough to stay over and …”
“I do trust you,” Thad said. “And while I am still against you fighting—especially for me—I guess it did do something to know you would unquestioningly throw yourself in front of any threats to me. Even if they’re just stupid words from a shitty hockey player.”
Graham smiled. He opened his mouth to say something, but he shook his head and closed it again, dipping his head to kiss Thad.
Thad smiled against his mouth and kissed him back. A little chaste—because whatever Graham said, morning breath wasn’t pleasant—but filled with love.
“I wish we had more time,” Graham said with a longing sigh as he sat up a few moments later. “There are so many things I’d like to do to you right now.”
Thad grinned. “Yeah?”
“Oh yeah.” Graham’s voice turned husky. “Abso-fucking-lutely. But you need to get up and get ready for work. You’re gonna have to swing by your place for clean clothes first, right?”
Thad groaned and let his head fall back against the pillow. “Probably.”
“There’s a solution to that,” Graham said.
“Yeah?” Thad kept his expression neutral.
As much as he loved Graham, he hoped he wasn’t going to ask him to move in. Thad wanted to believe he was ready for that commitment, but this was still early. Still a little too soon to say if sleeping through the night in Graham’s bed would be a regular thing. Or a one-off.
He had to be sure he was ready for it, but he hated the thought of disappointing Graham by saying no.
“Yep,” Graham said. “Bring some clothes over so whenever you do stay over, you’ll have them here. I’ll clear out a drawer and closet space for you.”
He grinned and slapped Thad’s side, then swung a leg over his midsection to get up off the bed. The movement made Thad wonder why he hadn’t had Graham ride his dick yet.
“Uhh, sure,” Thad agreed, attempting to focus on the conversation at hand. Anything that gave them more time together was a good thing.
He sat up and called after Graham, “Hey, what are you doing after work? Well, after my work is done. I know you have practice this morning.”
Graham turned back to face him. “Nothing much? I was planning to do a few errands after practice, but otherwise, probably relax. Why?”
“Oh, I have a few ideas,” Thad said with a grin as he got out of bed.