Chapter 17
“Ready for what?” I question, climbing into the passenger seat of his SUV that smells of the ocean and something sweet, fruity. Closing my eyes, I take in the scent, loving it—a reminder of Kai that makes me smile.
“For dinner, of course,” Kai replies, smirking at me and hitting me with a wink. “Were you thinking something else? Because that shower offer always stands. Anytime, anyplace.” Reaching over, he gives my thigh a soft squeeze.
Every time he offers, every time he says it, my mind drifts to thoughts of him shirtless. His boardshorts slung low on his hips, revealing the most gorgeous, the sexiest V, leading to something I want to explore but shouldn’t.
But why shouldn’t I?
Casual sex.
It’s not like Sean didn’t cheat on me a million times during our relationship, and besides, we’re over. Like over forever because I will not allow myself to be treated like that anymore. It’s time I put myself first, reminded myself that I’m worth more than just being some rockstar’s wife.
Not that I ever wanted to be a rockstar’s wife. I didn’t even know who Sean was when we first met, and there are times that I think that’s the reason he proposed in the first place. I wasn’t a fan, someone looking to latch onto his celebrity status, so he picked me.
I was safe. I wasn’t after his money, but boy, how the tables have turned, and things look so much different now that I want a divorce.
Money is being thrown at me to keep my mouth shut. While his team would never spin it that way, shying away from ever telling me it’s hush money.
But that’s exactly what it is.
I’ve lived this before, but at the time I was blinded by my love for Sean, not seeing it for what it really was.
Legal blackmail.
Assistants, maids, gardeners, managers—the list is endless of the number of people he bought to sign NDAs, making me believe it was just part of the business.
Now I’m a business liability.
His fucking wife.
“You okay over there?” Kai asks, interrupting my thoughts. I can feel the anger brewing inside me, boiling and bothered, and I don’t want it to ruin my evening.
“Yeah, I’m good. Sorry.”
“You don’t need to apologize. You’re going through a lot, and it clouds your thoughts. I get it. Wanna talk about it?”
“No, I actually don’t want to talk about it,” I nearly yell, my words coming out harsh, and I hate that I’ve just taken this out on Kai.
He’s been here from the beginning—the only person I’ve felt fully connected to since my split with Sean—and here I am yelling at him for asking if I want to talk about something that is currently consuming my life.
“Fuck, I’m sorry,” I quickly reply, shaking my head. My gaze moves to something far off in the distance. “That was super shitty of me. I’m still just trying to…” Rolling my eyes, I blow out a frustrated sigh.
“Again, Quinn, don’t apologize.” He’s just so chill with…everything. “I think tonight will help take your mind off things.”
Glancing over at me, he smiles with a hint of mischievousness, and I begin to wonder what he has planned.
Things with Kai and me have been…friendly, to say the least, but every day we spend together, there’s a shift. His fingers dance along the bare skin of my thigh, tracing soft circles that send goosebumps dotting my skin despite the tropical weather.
But I remember when Daisy invited me to the party at Sage and Nate’s, shooing Kai away from me and telling him he was icky. Yet, he hasn’t hidden any of this from me, letting me see his playboy persona and reminding me that we’re friends.
Friends can have sex and still be friends, right?
I don’t even know what’s going on with me. I’m a bit of a mess. Actually, “a bit” is an understatement.
His fingers begin to play with the hem of my dress, running the pad of his thumb over the stitching, his calloused knuckles grazing my thigh.
I love the way his touch feels, and I find myself lifting my leg to feel more of it, to get him closer. It’s been so long since I’ve felt intimacy, felt wanted, and I know he wants me.
The question is, can I handle being just a hook up because that’s all I’ll be to Kai? Right now, I like our friendship. I like having him around, surfing with him, having dinner, having him help me out with my disaster of a rental.
Things could all disappear if we sleep together.
“So what do you have planned?” I ask, changing the subject. I need to get away from anything that reminds me of sex or the shit show with Sean.
Although, sex could be the perfect distraction.
Oh my fucking god.
I want to slap myself in the forehead right now.
“It’s a surprise.”
I look over at him, pursing my lips and cocking my head to the side, hitting him with a mock-annoyed look that only makes him chuckle.
“Listen, babe,” he starts, but the second the word falls from his lips, I watch him swallow hard, his throat bobbing with the motion. “Yeah, uh, not going to tell you.” His words come out in a rush. Wetting his lips, he falls silent.
But a few seconds later, we are pulling into the parking lot for the Orchid Bay, and again, I find myself hitting him with a contemplative glance.
He follows the road to the employee parking garage, the arm of the gate going up when it recognizes his parking pass.
“I was just here,” I tease. “You know that, right?” My cheeks begin to ache from smiling, trying to figure out what he has in store. And the more I do, the more I feel like this is stepping over the line from friends to something more.
We’re balanced precariously on the edge and have been for a little while now. I love the flirting and the playful banter we have going, the way he makes my stomach flutter with anticipation and lust.
“I do know that, and while we both work here, it’s one of the best places on the island for something like this.”
“Are we surfing?” I question, and he laughs, hearty and deep. “Surfing? Here? You’re with a local. This is where the tourists surf. We don’t surf here when there’s epic swell in a million other places on this island.”
He sounds arrogant, and there’s something about it that amuses me. He should be arrogant.
I’ve seen him surf, seen his body shirtless, all lean muscle, shoulders flexing with each paddle on his board, abs tense, biceps curling.
The island is his home, away from the hustle and bustle of vacationers, finding hidden gems of greatness among the teal blue waters and lush green mountains.
Surfing is his passion, his home and his way of life. He makes boards, teaches people to surf and lives in the water, but all of this is done with love and intensity and respect for the island.
“I don’t know,” I squeal, finding myself excited by the prospect of something new and surprising.
He parks, and we exit. Coming around to my side, he weaves his fingers through mine. His palm is warm and comforting against my skin.
“Follow me,” he says, his words soft, and I swear I catch a tinge of nervousness in them, but it passes quickly. His air of casual confidence returns as he effortlessly navigates the massive garage.
I’ve only worked here for one day, but the resort is stunning, something I’d love the opportunity to explore.
With its lush local flora and greenery, all white marble flooring and deep-colored wood, it’s a stunning display, and it’s no surprise why people gravitate to it for their vacations.
While having lunch with Sloane today, we joked about how it’s always clean, not a speck of dirt to mar the white tile, not a bug within an inch of the open-air lobby. A human-created utopia that people pay thousands to enjoy.
It’s the kind of place Sean would have visited while off tour, but failing to bring me along, claiming he needed alone time to recover.
He was fucking other women.
That I know now.
Ugh…I need to get out of my own head, and suddenly, I am.
Overcome with the gorgeousness of what Kai has done.
It’s a private patio, or at least it feels that way, surrounded by full, lush greenery, dotted with yellow, pink and red hibiscus flowers.
It feels miles from anyone else, the ocean in front of us, a small table set for two with crisp white linens and expertly folded napkins.
Silverware placed, plates stacked, flowers garnishing it all.
There’s an oversized chaise to the left of the table, a pergola surrounding the patio with soft, wispy curtains that are drawn back. With the sun just beginning to set, it’s a stunning display.
“Did you do all this?” I ask him, and he slings an arm around my shoulders. A loose, natural smile on his lips, and when I lean into him, I can smell that sweet scent that fills his car.
“A perk of working here,” he replies, again with his aloofness, like this isn’t a huge deal.
It is.
It totally is.
This had to have cost a fortune, not to mention the cost of the food and drinks too, as there’s a bottle of wine on the table, surrounded by a silver bucket piled high with ice.
“Kai, this is too much. I’m not sure this is something friends—”
“Yeah, about that,” he starts, pulling a chair out for me, indicating for me to sit. “I kinda want to talk to you about something.”
“Okay.”
I can’t stop obsessing over the view and this gorgeous setup, as Kai pours us both a glass of wine. I want to ask a million questions about all of this, but he wants to talk.
Trying to give him my full attention, I look over, seeing him take a deep breath, letting it out slowly.
He is nervous, and it’s so damn adorable.
“So last night I was with the guys. Like when you had your girls’ night, and they were all giving me shit about liking you because, fuck, I don’t really get…” He pauses, shaking his head, his eyes unable to focus on me, and I giggle at how sweet it all is.
“But, yeah, so I like you, Quinn, and not just like friends. The fucking crazy thing is, I haven’t hooked up with anyone since I met you, and fuck, that’s so not me. And then my parents—my mom—was telling me that you’re kinda perfect for me. And I talk about you a lot. Fuck…”
He’s rambling, and my heart is hammering in my chest with each word he says. An excitement blooms within me, an attraction building, an attraction that has been there since day one.
Are we really going to do this?
A relationship?
I’m not even divorced yet.
“I’ve never felt this way about anyone, and it feels really fucking weird, but I think I kinda wanna give it a try. You know, like date. I know you’re still married, and maybe you don’t care to date some surf bum, but I’m putting myself out there.”
He’s looking at me now, his lips parted slightly, his breathing coming out in short, fast puffs of air, and again, I can’t handle all the honesty and adorableness.
It’s refreshing and a total change from what I’m used to.
“I mean, it’s okay if you’re, like, not interested because I have slept with a lot…” He trails off, his cheeks flushing at his admission. “Fuck, this is awkward.”
His muttered comment makes me laugh, and while it is a little awkward, it’s also adorable.
I reach across the table, taking his hand and threading our fingers together, smiling at him. He wets his lips, waiting for me to respond, and I don’t even know what to say.
I want to tell him yes. Jump headfirst into something with him, but I think we both know that’s not the best idea.
With me fresh out of an abusive relationship, and him probably freshly fucked by a bikini-clad tourist, we certainly make a disaster of a pair.
“How about this,” I start with a suggestion. “We keep this going.” I motion between us, both of us smiling now. “Just see where it goes. Because this is not a friendly dinner. This is most definitely a date, and I’m most definitely here for it.”
“You sure?”
“Totally sure.”