Deliverance

Chapter Forty One

Bridgette

The rest of the wedding was lovely. Heartfelt toasts, first dances, and a cake cutting that turned into an all-out food fight that was single-handedly Liam’s fault. He took a huge piece of cake and smashed it into Vincent’s face, and it was all over from there.

It was a wonderful day, but I’m so glad it’s over. Skyla and her…men? Husbands? Whatever she calls them, Maggie is relieved of her maid of honor duties, leading us to this moment.

My knee bounces in the passenger seat of her blacked out car when she reaches over, resting a hand on my knee to steady it.

“Easy, baby B. You nervous?” she asks as she parks the car.

I scoff, like that idea couldn’t be more ridiculous.

“No,” I huff. “I’ve been fucked before, Maggie. Plenty of times.”

Her eyes rake over me from head to toe, goosebumps spreading across my skin as her pretty pink lips pull up into a smirk.

“Not by me, you haven’t.”

With that, she slips out of the car, shutting the door and causing me to jump from the impact. Holy fuck. Does she realize how hot she is when she says shit like that? Of course, she does. She clearly does it on purpose. She has more game than any man out there. No wonder I’ve seen her with so many women over the years. They never stood a chance.

Before I can open my door, Maggie is there, offering her hand to me. Smiling to myself, I slip my hand into hers as I step out of the car. She laces our fingers together as she begins walking us to our dorm. I can’t help but look around us, waiting for Maryia to pop out around any corner.

“Aren’t you worried she will see us?” I ask as we make our way inside.

“Maybe I should be.”

“But you’re not?” I question.

“At this particular moment, the only thing I can think about is stripping you bare and getting you under me.”

I feel my body physically react to her, my pussy literally pulsing at her words as she hits the elevator button. I’m surprised she’s acting so calm. She felt so bad for so long the last time we hooked up. I heard every word of their fight; they didn’t break up. On the verge, sure, but Maggie and her are still very much together. Yet it was my pussy she was rubbing against, mine that she plans on fucking in the next three minutes, and I won’t even pretend to be a good person who is concerned about the idea of it. Sneaking around is fucking hot.

The instant we step into Maggie’s room, all sense of composure flies right out the window. We pounce on each other much like we did in that coat closet. Usually, Maggie is the dominant one when we’re in bed for the sake of experience, but something in me wants to fuck her as bad and as hard as she clearly wants to fuck me.

Pushing her onto the bed, I climb on top of her, lifting my dress up to bunch around my hips as I grind myself against her.

“Fuck, baby. You trying to be the one to fuck me tonight?”

“Maybe.” I smirk against her lips.

Her mouth lifts in amusement.

“Not tonight.”

Before I know what’s happening, she’s flipping me on my back, taking me from on top to beneath her in half a second. She smirks to herself before her hands lift to the back of my neck, pulling at the string of my dress. It comes undone easily and Maggie chases down the newly exposed skin like she can’t let an inch go untouched.

Her lips trail up and down my neck, across my chest, before sucking my nipple into her mouth. She nips at me, and I groan, rocking my hips against her.

“My girl loves a little pain with her pleasure, doesn’t she?” Maggie taunts.

“Uh huh,” I pant.

“Good,” she says before giving the other nipple the same treatment.

My back bows as her hands come behind my back, finding the zipper and slowly pulling it down. When the dress is fully undone, she bunches up the satin material and begins wiggling it off my body, leaving me in my black thong and high heels. Maggie’s finger hooks around my waistband, pulling my thong off when I try to kick off my heels.

“Stop, the heels stay on.”

My eyebrows lift at that. “Yeah? You like how pretty I look in them?” I tease.

“I don’t give a fuck how pretty you look. I want to feel them digging into me as I fuck you. The better I do, the deeper they go.”

See what I mean? No man has ever spoken to me the way Maggie fucking Bartlett does. Thank god for that because I no doubt would have gotten pregnant even before penetration.

Maggie pulls back, taking off her own dress when I realize she never put her panties back on from the closet. Oh shit. Well, whoever is handling coats will find a treasure, I suppose.

Her red hair is like a lion’s mane, wild and full, the deep red color such a sharp contrast to her soft, milky skin. For a redhead, she doesn’t have as many freckles as you’d think. At least, not on her face. Her body is full of them, and I make it my life’s mission to touch every single one with my mouth at least once.

Pushing off the bed for a moment, she moves to her dresser, going to the bottom drawer as she takes her time putting on a strap-on. You’d think the sight would be ridiculous, a woman essentially wearing a penis. I can assure you, it’s not. It’s fucking hot. The way she carries herself, the way she leans against me, the way just her fingers trail down my skin, has me practically shaking, desperate for more, desperate for her.

“Need some more foreplay, baby B? I’m happy to eat that cunt as long as you’ll let?—”

“Fuck me. Now. Please,” I interrupt.

Her hand moves to cup my face as she smiles.

“Anything for you.”

Lining herself up to me, she goes slow, pushing inside me. There is a little more resistance than a regular penis but the feeling of being so full is a welcome feeling. Even more so because when I look up, I see her smiling down at me. I feel myself pulse around the cock in me as Maggie draws back her hips and pushes in again.

A moan escapes me as she does it again and again.

“Fuck,” Maggie whimpers.

“Does that feel good for you?” I ask.

“Hell, yeah it does. I have one inside me, too.”

“Really?” I ask, more than a little intrigued. I didn’t know they could do that.

The only time I’ve ever seen a strap-on is…well when I saw that girl fuck Maggie at Indigonanza. I wonder if this is the same strap on. Has she used it on Maryia before? Scratch that, don’t know, don’t care.

We soon find an easy rhythm that seems to be hitting the good spot for us both. Our hands frantically reach for one another, clambering as if we can’t get close enough.

“I love you, Maggie. I love you so much. I didn’t know that I could ever love anyone, let alone a woman, let alone you. But I do.”

“Shh,” Maggie says, her thumb gently dragging across my cheek as she smiles.

“I love you, Bridgette. So fucking much. Life without you…it’s not life at all.”

My heart soars at her words before she leans down, pressing her lips against mine. I feel my orgasm approach and Maggie rocks into me harder, sending me over the edge. The scream I let out will no doubt have the cops called on us, but ask me if I care. Maggie’s comes seconds later, her body shaking as she continues thrusting, fucking me through her orgasm before collapsing against me.

I couldn’t tell you how long we lay there. Just…being. Her arms are wrapped around me, our breathing perfectly lined up as I trail my fingers against her bare back.

“Wow,” I say, more to myself than anything.

“Yeah,” Maggie murmurs.

My heart rate begins to even, but Maggie’s dildo is still inside me and I feel myself contract around it.

“Can we go again?” I ask.

She looks up at me, an amused smirk on her face.

“Fuck yes.”

* * *

I have therapy the next morning. It took me hours to bring up that fact to Maggie. Longer to actually invite her to come. I was expecting her to turn me down, I don’t know why. People that aren’t in therapy sometimes don’t get it. I should have known that wouldn’t be the case with Maggie. She didn’t look put off or inconvenienced by it; she seemed honored. She happily accepted, and now here I sit, in my therapist’s office, with Maggie and Brad outside.

Of course, I’ve told Ariel all about Maggie, all the way up to the letters. The only thing she doesn’t know is how we hooked up at Skyla’s wedding or went back to her room and fucked all night long. She knows about Maryia and exactly how I feel about her. One glance in Maggie’s direction and I knew Ariel understood exactly who she was.

“I see you brought someone else with you today,” Ariel says.

I can’t even stop the smile that spreads across my face.

“Yeah.”

“Is there a particular reason?” she asks.

My smile slips as I swallow and nod. Ariel has been asking me if I’ve shared anything that we’ve talked about with others. I’ve been avoiding the conversation for a while, but during the last session, I broke down and admitted that I hadn’t. She was concerned that if I didn’t open up, at least to one person, at least a little, the feelings inside me would manifest into more ideas that could lead to self-harm, and maybe Maggie wouldn’t be there to save me this time.

“I’m ready to talk about it,” I say.

She nods. “To who?”

“Both of them.”

Surprise hits her features before a smile that is equal parts kindness and pride.

“Why don’t you go grab them then?”

I nod, standing up and moving to the door. Maggie and Brad are talking amongst themselves, smirking when their eyes come to me.

“Everything okay?” Brad asks.

“Yeah. Will you guys come in?”

Matching frowns take over their faces as they stand up and follow me in. I take my usual seat on the couch while Brad sits on my left and Maggie on my right.

“Brad, it’s good to see you,” Ariel says, before turning to Maggie. “I’m Ariel; it’s a pleasure.”

“The pleasure is all mine,” Maggie says. “I’ve heard a lot about you. Thank you for helping her.”

Ariel shrugs. “She does all the heavy lifting, I’m just here to be a sounding board.”

I smile at that before my gut begins to twist. My entire body begins to shake, a tingling cold sensation spreading from the tips of my fingers to my toes. My eyes come to Ariel, who is watching me carefully. I can practically hear her words in my head. Take a breath, go at your pace. If you’re not ready, you’re not ready.

I am, though. I want to be. I need to be. If I keep bottling and bottling, I’ll break to the point that nothing and no one can fix me. I’ll be discarded glass. I’ll be…I have to.

“I was mad at you for a long time,” I say as I turn to face Brad.

His brows cave in with concern as he quietly listens. I exhale heavily, shaking my head as I roll my lips together.

“I was so mad. You moved out and left me behind. You moved out, and I lost the only person that had been there for me my entire life. You moved out and…and dad moved in.”

Brad stares at me for a second, shaking his head as Maggie makes a soft noise of surprise. I don’t look at her, though, instead keeping my eyes on my brother. I attempt to swallow over the building lump in my throat, trying and failing several times before I’m able.

“The day you moved out…that was the first time.”

He shakes his head. “The first time for what?”

I can practically hear my heartbeat in my ears as I suck in and blow out a shaky breath. His eyes are begging me to just spit it out already, so I do.

“The first time our father raped me.”

The entire room shifts: gravity, the oxygen, everything. It’s as if the entire room has been tipped on its side, and no one makes a sound or moves a muscle for several seconds. Brad’s face is white as a ghost as I continue.

“He told me that it was just me and him now, that we had to look out for each other. Take…care of each other. I didn’t get out of bed for a week, and in my head, I blamed you.”

“How many times?” Brad asks evenly.

“What?”

“How. Many. Times?” he asks through clenched teeth as he takes a deep breath, like he’s attempting to compose himself.

I shake my head. “I lost count around my sixteenth birthday. As recent as,” I pause, swallowing roughly. “October 31 st .”

“What?” he shouts, jumping to his feet as he shakes his head. “How? I was there! We both were! When?”

“When you and Maggie fell asleep, Calista went to bed and Thomas took me into the bedroom.” I start.

“No,” Brad says as he begins pacing, continuing to shake his head. “No, no, no, no.”

“Dad stepped inside as well and locked the door. Thomas raped me before dad took his turn,” I say, struggling with the actual word rape.

It’s something Ariel and I have been working on. When I first started seeing her, I used words like touched, take care of, even fucked. Ariel explained that none of that was happening, though. Every touch, every kiss, every…move was rape. It was rape, and it was abuse and it wasn’t okay. I wasn’t okay.

A crash startles me as I watch Brad shatter the ceramic lamp against the wall. Shards of it rain down as he heaves.

“How?” he asks. “How could you not have told me? Not come to me? Bridge, I would have stopped him. I never would have left. I would have brought you with me. I…”

Shaking his head, he crosses the room.

“Brad, I think what Bridgette needs—” Ariel starts before Brad opens and closes the door, practically shaking the thing off its hinges.

My heart hurts at his reaction because I ask myself the same questions. Why couldn’t I have been a little more brave? A little more strong? Maybe it could have stopped years ago if I got the right people involved. I didn’t, though. Instead, I sat there and let him, both of them, chip away at me, taking a little more every time until I had nothing left, nothing to lose, and no way out.

Asher was never the goal for love. He was never the goal for wealth. He was the goal for security. From a young age I knew that Asher would be the most powerful man in our world one day. I decided my only chance at freedom was to earn the protection of someone like that. I’ve been trying to persevere, to survive, for so long that I had forgotten how to live completely. I operated on autopilot most of my life and I’m only just now realizing how damaging that really has been.

Chancing a glance at Maggie, I see a desperation behind her glossy eyes.

“Baby B,” she whispers brokenly. “All this time?”

“I’m sorry,” I say with a quivering lip.

“No, knock that off right now. You have nothing to be sorry for, do you hear me? Nothing. He did this to you, they did. This is not something you did. This is not something you could have stopped. Brad is handling his emotions out loud right now. They are not a reflection of you, okay?”

“Well put.” Ariel nods as Maggie ignores her, continuing to speak.

“I just…I can’t believe I didn’t see it more clearly. I can’t believe…baby,” she says, a soft sob ripping through her chest.

She pulls me into her, and I go willingly, wrapping my arms around her as I begin to cry.

“I’ve got you, do you hear me? I have you. I promise, I will never let anyone hurt you again. You felt alone, like no one was there. I’m here, I’m right here, and I’m not going anywhere, you understand me?”

I nod, desperate to cling to Maggie more when the door opens, a more composed looking Brad stepping in. He keeps his head held high, his shoulders back as he crouches down in front of me. I release my hold on Maggie just enough so I can face him as he speaks.

“I’m sorry, Bridgey. This is not your fault. Not for a second. I should have seen it sooner. I should have…” he pauses, shaking his head as violence like I’ve never seen before flashes in his eyes. “This is that piece of shit’s fault, no one else. Okay? Not you.”

I’m starting to believe it with the help of Ariel. Our first few sessions, we definitely did not see eye to eye.

“Is this why…why you tried to kill yourself?” Brad strains.

I wince, looking down at my hands.

“I didn’t know any other way out.”

“Me,” Brad says, “I’m the way out. Maggie is the way out. We are your family, Bridgette. We are here to be in your corner, to be your getaway drivers. We are here to protect you at all costs,” he says, as Maggie nods her head in agreement.

“Thank you,” I whisper, my vision going blurry as tears begin to fall.

“You don’t thank me for that,” Brad says, pulling me into his arms as I sob. “We’re here. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere,” he says as he presses a kiss to the side of my head, squeezing me tighter like he has the power to take every bad memory away.

I wish he could.

My eyes come to Maggie over Brad’s shoulder, a look of pain and empathy on her face. I give her a weak smile, and she returns it, reaching out to rub my back as she nods. I’ve been so relieved my father hasn’t touched me since October, but that hasn’t stopped Thomas. I know I’m stronger than that, that I’m a fighter. I just never thought I had anything worth fighting for.

I do now, though, and I’m not going to let them take one more goddamn thing from me.