CHAPTER 42
Rebecca is fast asleep when I get back home. Worry has been a tight band around my chest all day—maybe even since I left her in the back of that van, I realize as relief washes over me at the sight of her. I sink into the red chair and watch her like I’ve done so many times before I got her out. Even since then, I’ve often been sitting here, imagining she was in my bed.
I can’t believe she actually is.
I can’t believe she came back to me.
I can’t believe she’s so reckless to return to this city.
Anger rises inside me, and I want to punish her with my cock the same way I did when she came. But she needs to rest, and I need to regain some control. This girl makes it slip so easily, and if I want any shot at keeping her alive, I need a clear head. So I unlock the cuff around her wrist, careful not to wake her, then grab the bucket and leave the room, closing the door quietly behind me.
After cleaning the bucket, I go to the living room, pour myself a glass of scotch, and sink onto the couch. The liquor takes the edge off, and after a few sips and some quiet, I find that I’m able to think more clearly. But even so, I can’t come up with any good solution as to what to do with her. The safest thing would be to send her back and order her to never return. Maybe tell her it was all a hoax—that I never truly cared about her; it was all just a means to bend her to my will. She’s so fragile that I think I could make her believe it. But the thought of breaking her like that is unbearable, and so is the idea of letting her go.
But if I keep her, I just might end up losing her anyway.
If I keep her, I can’t keep it a secret. I somehow have to convince Gabor to let me have her. It will be a dangerous task, both for her and me, but as I consider it, it seems like the only way to go. After all, I’ve been doing dangerous shit all my life and gotten out of it all, and this is not a game that is new to me. I know Gabor. I know how he thinks, how he works, what sets him off, and what appeases him. And what more is, I have a big leeway with him.
He trusts me the same way I trust him, and even though I can tell he sometimes considers having me killed for my brash attitude, he doesn’t. I’m too valuable. And at the end of the day, he knows I’m usually right.
He was furious after I stopped him from cutting Rebecca’s foot. Once he thought she was gone, he demanded that I find a new girl for him. So I did that, like I’ve done many times before. But Rebecca had gotten to Gabor more than any of the other girls had, just like she’d done with me—though in a different way. He wanted revenge for not getting to carry out the extreme sadistic lust she had awoken within him. Since he couldn’t do it on her, he took it out on the new girl.
I tried making him dial back a few times during the night, but my heart wasn’t in it. I didn’t care about the girl and didn’t care about keeping Gabor from fucking up. I guess some part of me wanted revenge too—for him denying Rebecca a doctor.
But in the end, I didn’t gain much. Because I was the one who got to clean up the mess.
One night, and the girl was so broken that the merciful thing to do was snap her neck and bury her in the woods where no one would ever find her. So I did that. Gabor didn’t care what happened to her, anyway. He had used her for what he needed.
Then, once coming out of the sadistic haze, Gabor got mad at me for not stopping him. And that was it. I told him I was done working on his girls.
I told myself and him that I was sick of cleaning up his messes. And maybe that was part of it. But when it comes down to it, the real reason I couldn’t be involved in his girls anymore was Rebecca. I couldn’t stand the idea of touching anyone else, and even with that one girl, I kept thinking about Rebecca all night, aching for her. All I could think of was the slender girl with the milky skin and big green eyes that begged me for protection even as I repeatedly thrust her into the worst nightmares of her life.
He was furious at first, but when I told him how Rebecca had come in the way of handling other, more important things, he came to his senses. I barely even had to lie. Taking care of Rebecca and making sure she didn’t break distracted me and almost made me fuck up another business deal, but it wasn’t for the same reasons Gabor thinks.
The creak of the bedroom door pulls me out of my thoughts, and the vision of a half-naked Rebecca stepping into my living room is like a sweet dream.
“Come here,” I say, waving my hand at her.
She tip-toes across the floor and sits on the couch beside me with way too much distance between us—even though it’s barely a foot.
I set the tumbler down and pull her into my lap, burying my nose in her hair and inhaling her sweet scent. Tension I didn’t know was there drains from my muscles. God, I’ve missed her.
“How did you find me?” I ask, keeping my nose in her hair, nuzzling the side of her neck.
“I got some help.”
“From who?”
“I found someone who specializes in that sort of thing,” she answers vaguely, as if knowing I won’t like the answer.
“Who?” I press, straightening as tension seeps back into my body.
“A man named Ricco tracked you down for me. Gave me your address.”
“And then what? Did he help you get into the country too?” I curl my hand around the back of her neck, and I can’t hold back my anger as I lower my voice and tighten my grip. “Or were you foolish enough to drive across the border yourself?”
She shakes her head against my chest. “His… associate helped me.”
“And how are the two of them associated?”
She lets out a heavy sigh. “A biker club.”
“Fuck!” I exclaim, digging my fingers so hard into the sides of her neck that she yelps. “You can’t get involved with people like that.” I pull her out to look her in the eyes, needing to see if she’s telling the truth when she answers my next question. “How did you pay him?”
“Cash. Seventy thousand Danish crowns,” she mumbles, lowering her gaze, clearly knowing that’s not what I mean.
“What else?”
She tries to dismiss me with a shrug, but I’m not going to let this go before she tells me the full truth.
“What else?” I demand, giving her a shake. “And don’t tell me you got all that for seventy thousand. I know this business, Rebecca.”
She stares down at her hands, clearly unable to face me as she says, “A night with Ricco.”
A feral growl escapes me, and all my muscles coil tight, adrenaline spiking in my veins as I’m preparing for a fight. Her eyes become frightened as she looks back up. I think she’s afraid I’ll hurt her, and part of me wants to, but a more pressing part of me wants to hold her. Take care of her and protect her. So I do that. I pull her into me and hold her, letting the feeling of her slender body appease the rage boiling inside me.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers.
“Don’t lie,” I growl, tightening my grip around her to the point where her breathing becomes shallow. I hold her there for a while as I struggle to rein in another wave of rage, and it’s still simmering when I pull her back out to stare her straight in the eye. “Don’t. Ever. Let another man touch you again. No fucking man puts his hands on you unless I say so.” I shake her by the neck to force the message into her. “Do you get it?”
She nods, and her face flickers with this strange mix of fear and something that looks like relief that makes me want to throw her onto her back and fuck her brutally even as I hug her tight. But I’m afraid I’ll lose control with my temper still raging inside me, and I don’t want to hurt her. Not like that. So I settle for holding her, feeling how her rapid heartbeat calms as she snuggles into me. It soothes my urge to rip something apart and punish her, and I gradually come down too, loosening my grip on her and caressing her instead.
“I don’t know what to do with you,” I finally say as the anger morphs into a nagging sort of defeat. “I should try to get you out again, but I can’t make myself do that.”
“Then don’t.”
“Do you have any idea how dangerous it is if Gabor finds out that I’m hiding you here?”
“I know,” she says.
“He thinks I got rid of you—that you’re dead.” Silence hangs heavy in the air as I consider how to explain this to her. The danger of her being here. “He’ll want us both to pay if he finds out you’re still alive. Which he will, eventually, if you stay here.” He won’t kill me. I’m too valuable. But the thought of him killing Rebecca… I simply can’t take it.
“I’m sorry,” she says, seemingly at a loss for words.
“If someone finds out that I’m hiding you here, he’ll have no choice but to react.” I rub my forehead, then drop my hand to the couch with a sigh. “I could try to get us fake IDs so we could skip town. But it’s risky. Nothing slips under Gabor’s nose around here. And we’d be watching our backs for the rest of our lives.”
“You said he wants to keep things clean. No dead bodies and all that. Isn’t there a chance he’ll let us go. Hunting someone down must mean lots of trouble—lots of resources.”
I let out a humorless chuckle. “Sure, if it was only you. But if I betrayed him like that—disobeying a direct order, then taking off…” His eyes darken into black pits. “He’d want to cut me into tiny pieces and feed them to the pigs.” He’d want revenge of the worst kind. This strange connection we have goes both ways. Gabor is the only person I’d trust with my life, and he feels the same about me.
She clutches my shirt, pressing herself close to me. “What then? I need to know.”
“I don’t know. I might have a plan, but it’s dangerous for us both, and I haven’t fully thought it through yet.”