Chapter 23
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Alive.
That’s the first thought that went through Phoenix’s mind because... Damn, he hurt. Everywhere. His head. His chest. His ribs. And when he tried to move... Nothing but crushing pain making it hard to breathe. To even attempt opening his eyes.
Not happening. Not when blinking made his head spin. Had him fading. Drifting in some kind of numbing haze until he crawled back up. Did his best to do more than peek at his surroundings.
Waiting for the room to stabilize took forever. Hours or maybe days. He wasn’t sure. Wasn’t really aware of anything other than the pain and the shifting scenery. A hand on his cheek had him turning his head. Finally focusing on more than a scattering of black dots.
She was beautiful. Green eyes staring down at him.
All that chestnut hair loose around her shoulders, just waiting for him to run his fingers through it.
Fist it as he claimed her mouth. She looked tired.
As if she hadn’t slept in days, the fine lines around her mouth deeper than before.
Or maybe it was just the way she pursed her mouth. As if she was scared.
Hurt. That’s what it looked like. As if she was in pain.
He frowned, tried to move, only to grunt. Relax against the mattress. He opened his mouth to ask her what was wrong—who the fuck had hurt her—but nothing came out. Just him licking his lips. Trying to make everything work.
She tsked, offering him a straw. “It’s way too early for you to be talking. Drink, then sleep.”
He took a sip, then attempted to shake his head. Failed, but held her gaze. “Where...”
One word, and it nearly blacked him out. Had him closing his eyes. But he grasped her hand when she threaded her fingers through his.
“Cannon’s. Brady brought you back in his mobile clinic once he’d fixed you up and wasn’t worried you’d outright die on him.”
Cannon’s? How long had he been out?
He tried to ask, to get another word out, but it was useless. Nothing worked.
Olivia sighed. “Stubborn. It’s been four days, but you probably need four weeks. Sleep. We’ll talk when you’re better, because I still have something to tell you. And, this time, you’re not going to stop me.”
He’d been out for four days? And what did she have to tell him?
It must be important enough she’d stuck around.
Hadn’t returned to London. Had they finished the mission?
Had he screwed everything up? He couldn’t remember anything beyond holding her while she fell asleep, wishing he’d had the courage to tell her he loved her.
Her fingers brushed over his face, lulling him back to sleep. To that numbing haze where the pain receded. Left him drifting in the darkness until someone gave him a slight shake.
He blinked, cursed at the blinding glimpses of light before slowly slivering his eyes open. Turning his head to focus on the person standing next to him.
A shake of the man’s head, then he was checking lines. Adjusting an IV. “You know, Vale, it’s like you’re trying to make me look bad if I don’t pull some miraculous save out of my ass.”
Brady. And he didn’t seem impressed.
Phoenix blinked a few more times, pressing his head into the pillow when the pain resurfaced. Not quite as red hot, but there. “You...”
Damn, his throat felt dry. He swallowed as best he could, then tried, again. “Can’t be the best if you only get the easy cases.”
Brady laughed. “So, you’re doing this for my benefit? To make me a better doctor? How considerate.”
He bent low, flashing a light in each eye. “Olivia’s been hell-bent on staying by your side. I had to have Gibson physically remove her in order to get her to sleep. Girl’s as determined as you are to make that trip to the undertaker. She’s on the brink of exhaustion.”
“Do all blokes exaggerate in this country, or just the former-military ones?”
Phoenix inhaled at the sound of Olivia’s voice. That sexy accent making him smile. She moved into view beyond Brady’s shoulder, even more beautiful than Phoenix remembered. But Brady was right. She looked as if she was about to fall down.
Phoenix reached out his hand for her, or at least, he thought he did. He tried. Didn’t do more than wiggle his fingers, but she got the message. She glared at Brady until he let her shuffle in next to the bed and hold Phoenix’s hand.
Brady shook his head, looking pointedly at her. “You can stay as long as you sleep. Just don’t kill the poor guy in the process. But he should be okay if you don’t put any weight on his right side. Deal?”
She nodded, giving Brady a side-eye as he headed for the door. “The man’s worse the Miller. Bloody nursemaid.”
“I heard that. Get some sleep. I’ll have Gibson bring you both some food in a bit.”
She rolled her eyes, smiling down at him once Brady was gone. “I swear all your mates are going to get an arse kicking if they don’t stop coddling me.”
He smiled, knowing she’d easily kick their asses. “You look tired.”
“You look worse.”
He sighed. “Still alive.”
“Barely. And only because your mate, Ice, saved your sorry arse, repeatedly, before we got you back to Brady. I can see why you consider them family. They’re pretty damn brilliant.”
“Almost as brilliant as you.”
“Aren’t you a charmer.” She rounded the bed to the other side, climbing in beside him. Not quite touching him, but he felt her presence. The soft caress of her breath as she settled in next to him. “This okay?”
He shifted a bit—got her to rest her head on his shoulder. “Much better.”
“Until the pain makes you want to bang you head through a wall. Just let me put my head—”
“It’s perfect right where it is. Promise.”
She sighed but didn’t shift. Instead, she relaxed, one hand lightly splaying across his hip. “Sleep. Before Brady decides to sedate both of us.”
“Does this mean I didn’t screw everything up? We’re okay?” He shifted his gaze enough to look at her and smile. Because one thing he did remember was how she glowed when he smiled. “I don’t remember much after leaving Bishop’s.”
“You lost a lot of blood. I’m sure you’ll remember more once you’re stronger. And, yeah, we’re good. Better than good, actually. Assuming you weren’t lying when you confessed your undying love.”
He’d told her he loved her? And she hadn’t run off screaming? Hopped the first flight back to London to avoid having to answer. Had she answered?
He met her gaze. “I guess it depends.”
She arched a brow. “On?”
“On whether you said it back.”
“Wanker that you are, you wouldn’t let me. Some rubbish about it being a veiled goodbye. That you needed my reply as motivation to make it back in one piece.” She snorted. “You completely bollocksed that up, by the way.”
“Not so bollocksed from where I’m sitting.”
“You’re lying on a bed and barely doing that without dying on me.” She closed her eyes. “Sleep.”
“How about I promise not to stop you the next time you try to confess your love?”
One eye slivered open. “Is that you admitting you don’t regret telling me? Even if you can’t remember?”
“I don’t need to remember it for it to be true. I loved you long before you showed up in that café. I’m just sorry I didn’t have the balls to tell you before. That I let you go.”
She smiled and damn she was glowing. Just like he’d hoped. “I’ll forgive you. Now, sleep. Or I’ll never get the chance to tell you I love you, too.”
She loved him. And based on the pain teasing his senses, he wasn’t dreaming.
He let the thought sink in as he drifted off, the steady beat of her heart against his side soothing the panicky feeling he hadn’t realized had taken hold.
The one where he’d been worried that she’d left.
Or didn’t want the kind of future he did.
One where they spent the next sixty years of their life together.
Images of how he’d spend those years played in his head until darker ones took hold. Smyth standing beside him at the hanger. The promise of an even greater threat. The memories had him bolting upright, taking Olivia with him as he fought against the blanket. The tubes in his arms.
Hands settled on his shoulders, holding him still before he managed to focus—stare at Brady.
The man tsked. “Looks like you’re ready to do more than lie on your back. Give me a second.”
He disconnected the IV, then helped Phoenix scoot back until he was braced against the headboard, Olivia still nestled beside him.
She looked as if she was going to move, but he wrapped his arm around her—held her tight.
She stared up at him for several heartbeats then sighed, once again, relaxing against him.
Brady waited until they were both settled before easing back. “Bad dream?”
“More like bad memories. Is the rest of the crew here?”
“I think so. Why?”
“We need to talk. Don’t suppose I’m free to leave the room?”
“Can you do that without pulling out your stitches? Because if I have to fix another wound on you, Vale...”
Phoenix chuckled. “I’ll manage. Just, get them organized in the other room, okay?”
Brady glanced over at Olivia, but she waved him off.
“I’ll make sure he doesn’t fall flat on his face, the wanker.”
“And who’s going to stop you from passing out?” Brady sighed. “Never mind. Just...be careful.”
Phoenix waited until he’d left before staring down at Olivia. “You’re gonna stop me for falling? You’re half my size.”
“But twice as stubborn.”
He laughed. “Damn, I love you. Okay, let’s get this started. I don’t suppose you could grab me a pair of pants?”
She eased off the bed, moving around to the other side as he drew back the covers and swung his legs over the edge. “Something wrong with your mates seeing you in your knickers? Because I quite enjoy the view.”
“They might not.”
“Oh, I don’t know. You did say something about fancying Gibson...” She smiled at his attempted slap. “Fine, I’ll grab you some trousers and a jumper.”
“Have I told you how much I love the way you say things?”
“Not nearly enough.” She bent down, helping him dress before stepping back. “Okay, let’s give it a try.”