Chapter 18
Devyn opened her eyes and blinked.
She saw the light from the bathroom that Lucky had left on. For her. Because she was freaking scared of the damn dark now.
And every night she slept for around three hours, then woke up suddenly. As wide awake as if she’d just had four cups of espresso.
It was annoying.
She’d really hoped that once she was home and safe, she’d be able to get past what had happened.
She hated that Spencer had been beaten up, that Lucky had been terrified while she was missing, and even that Whiskers and Angel had to be traumatized by the men who’d come into the house and brought extreme violence with them.
Even though Devyn had been knocked unconscious after one blow and didn’t remember anything about her abduction, it still scared her to think about what had happened.
She tried to rationalize her experience by telling herself it wasn’t that bad.
She’d woken up tied to a tree and that was that.
Hadn’t worried about being sexually assaulted.
The worst thing that had happened to her was that she’d gotten bitten by bugs and had gone to the bathroom in her pants.
But she was kidding herself. The entire thing had been terrifying. And even though she was safe and back home with Lucky and everything seemed to have worked out in the end, she wasn’t all right.
Every night since she’d been found and brought back to Killeen, she’d woken up in the wee hours with her heart racing and having a panic attack.
Intellectually, she knew she had nothing to be scared of.
Lucky was with her. She could hear the animals snoring on their bed in the corner of the room.
The bathroom light was on, so she knew she wasn’t in the middle of that forest.
It was the damn birds chirping.
Devyn supposed she heard them unconsciously and her body forced her to wake up, maybe just to make sure she wasn’t back in that forest, tied up and helpless. Whatever the reason, she hated it.
The first few nights, she’d tried sneaking out of bed, but Lucky had woken up and been so upset that she wasn’t sleeping, Devyn felt guilty.
He’d started going back to work on the post and needed his rest. So now when she woke up, she lay in bed for hours, staring at the ceiling and berating herself for being so stupid and weak.
Tonight, Devyn’s thoughts turned to her family.
Spencer was already in rehab back in Missouri.
Her parents had flown down when they’d heard about what happened to two of their children.
They’d been disappointed in Spencer, but supportive.
Devyn had downplayed what happened to her to make sure the focus was on her brother and getting him the help he needed.
For the first time in his life, he was the center of attention, and it seemed he really needed that.
Devyn wasn’t bitter; she was relieved that she hadn’t been seriously hurt, allowing Mila, Angela, and their parents to turn all their attention to Spencer.
He was in a thirty-day in-house treatment program in St. Louis, and after that, the psychologists would assess where he was and see if he needed to stay longer.
He wasn’t allowed to have any visitors for the first month, so he could completely concentrate on himself and not have any outside factors interfering with his recovery.
Devyn was genuinely happy for her brother.
Well, happy might not be the word…relieved, maybe.
She’d moved away from Missouri because she’d been scared of what he might do if she continued to refuse him money, and it seemed that wasn’t really the best move.
Spencer had become so desperate to get his hands on money any way he could, he’d gotten involved with a ruthless loan shark.
But on the other hand, everything that had occurred had ultimately led to Spencer seeking help.
And it had led her to Lucky.
Life was slowly returning to normal for the others, during the two weeks since she’d been found. Aspen and Brain had brought Chance home and were getting used to being a family of three. Riley and Oz were preparing for the birth of their child. They had about two more months to go.
Gillian had organized a party for a large local company, which had gone off without a hitch.
She’d been getting more and more local business and was as busy as ever.
Kinley was working a lot too; she’d gotten a job as an executive assistant and, from what Devyn heard, had changed up everything, making her boss’s schedule run much more efficiently.
Everyone seemed to be happy and well-adjusted, even after what they’d all been through, and here was Devyn…scared of a fucking bird.
“Dev?” Lucky mumbled as he rolled over and lifted his head.
“Go back to sleep. It’s early,” she said softly.
“Not sleeping?” he asked.
“I’m fine,” she said automatically.
Lucky rolled toward her and put an arm around her chest. He leaned forward and kissed her shoulder before resting his head back on his pillow. “What can I do to help?”
“Nothing. I’m gonna get up and go downstairs and read,” Devyn told him, slipping out from under his arm and throwing her legs over the side of the mattress.
“Dev—”
She ruthlessly interrupted him before he could say anything else.
“I’m fine, Lucky. Seriously. You have to get up in two and a half hours and go to work.
Sleep.” She didn’t give him time to answer, standing up and heading for the closet.
She grabbed a pair of comfortable sweat pants and one of his Army sweatshirts before leaving the room.
Even though she’d been a bitch, she couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed when he didn’t follow her.
God, she was a mess. If he had come after her, she would’ve been irritated, yet here she was, upset when he didn’t. She really needed to get her shit together.
Later that morning, after Lucky had gone to work, Devyn sat on the couch with Whiskers purring in her lap and Angel sitting next to her, snoring.
She hated how things were going with Lucky, and knew it was all her fault.
He was doing all he could to help her, to figure out what was wrong, but Devyn was keeping him at arm’s length.
She wasn’t sure why, just that she was struggling with getting back into the routine of her life.
She loved Lucky, that wasn’t in question. She needed to get back to work, decide if she was going to go full time, and get on with her life. But she couldn’t. She was stuck.
A bird warbled outside, and Devyn winced.
Shit. Would she never be able to hear a damn bird again without flinching?
Her cell phone rang, scaring the shit out of Devyn, and she laughed nervously as she reached for it. Seeing it was Aspen, she eagerly answered. “Hey! How’s mama and baby?”
“We’re good, and we’re having a girls’ day in. Get your ass over here.”
Devyn blinked. “What?”
“Gillian’s already here, Riley’s on the way, and Kinley’s coming to your place right now to get you. So if you aren’t up and dressed, you better get that way, pronto.”
Devyn had to chuckle. “You’re awfully bossy today.”
“I have to be. Chance is sleeping and I don’t know how long he’ll be down. I need to talk to someone besides this kid, and I finally convinced Brain to go to work today. You’re coming over, so get ready.”
Devyn wasn’t sure she wanted to be social, but she nodded and said, “Okay, okay. Do I have time for a shower?”
That was another thing. Devyn had been taking two or three showers a day. She couldn’t seem to feel clean enough.
“If it’s fast, yes. Can’t wait to spend some time with you, Dev,” Aspen said more gently. “See you soon.”
“Bye.”
Devyn hung up and couldn’t decide if she liked that her friends were pushy or not.
Sighing, she gave Whiskers one last pet and gently extricated herself from under the cat.
She wanted to be ready before Kinley got there.
Angel and Whiskers hated the sound of the doorbell or when someone knocked on the door.
They’d been traumatized by the violence that had happened inside what they’d finally seen as their safe space, and it would take a while before they forgot what happened.
Thirty minutes later, Devyn was dressed and waiting when Kinley pulled up. She slipped out of the townhouse, locked the door behind her, and headed for the Toyota Corolla.
Kinley smiled as she climbed in. “You look good,” she said.
“Thanks, you too,” Devyn replied.
They made small talk as they drove toward Aspen and Brain’s house.
They’d been talking about buying a bigger one, but neither seemed to be in a huge hurry to make the move.
After they’d pulled into the driveway and gotten out, they waved to Winnie—Aspen’s elderly neighbor, who was sitting on her porch—and headed for the door.
“It’s about time!” Aspen said as she met them at the door and gave them both a big hug.
Devyn eyed Aspen and nodded in satisfaction. Her friend looked great. A little tired but, that wasn’t too surprising since she was a new mom.
“Hey,” Gillian said, hugging both Devyn and Kinley. “Come on, I’ve already poured you a glass of wine, and I picked all the yucky cashews out of the mixed nuts for you, Dev.”
Devyn smiled. She loved that her friends knew her so well.
An hour later, they were all settled in Aspen’s living room and Devyn was feeling much more mellow, now that she’d had two glasses of wine.
Chance had woken up twenty minutes ago and Aspen had fed him.
They’d talked about how hard it had been for her to breastfeed at first and how she’d had to supplement Chance’s feedings with formula.
They’d discussed the ickier aspects of childbirth as well.
Devyn had been afraid the frank talk would freak Riley out, since she was next up to have a baby, but she seemed grateful for the information, even when it was gruesome at times.
Chance was now sleeping again, and Aspen had put him in a bassinet on the other side of the room.