Chapter 5
CHAPTER FIVE
Aspen
As I sat in Rocky’s car, my body trembled with rage and unshed tears. The version of Caroline I’d met earlier today, wasn’t the one I just saw. It wasn’t like I knew her or anything, but her outburst had been unexpected to say the least. My hands curled into fists within my lap as my gaze remained fixated on the window.
What bothered me the most was the fact that not everything she said about me was a lie. I couldn’t even go to school right now, so how the hell was I supposed to better myself? Maybe I was destined for failure. To live in some run-down trailer park with a shitty as guy I didn’t even like.
The heater warmed my skin as hot air escaped from the vents. It felt nice being in a car, driving around. It’s something I haven’t experienced in a very long time—something I didn’t even know I missed.
“You okay?” Rocky asked me from behind the wheel. His jaw was clenched though, as if he was holding onto some frustration himself.
I snorted in response. “How many times are you going to ask me that today?”
Ever since I woke up, people have asked me over and over again if I was okay. My answer wouldn’t change, so they should just get the hell over it. I was grateful to Rocky for saving my life, but it didn’t mean I needed to pour out my feeling like some whiny little bitch. That just wasn’t me.
“Until I believe it.” Was his only response. He tilted his head to look at me, an unreadable emotion etched into his face.
“Whatever,” I murmured. “It isn’t your place. Just cut the shit and stop pretending you care about me.”
The car came to a sudden halt as we reached the front gate. A surprised gasp fluttered from my lips as I was jerked forward in my seat due to the impact. Turning to look at him, my heart raced within my chest. His gaze had changed from the lighthearted, care-free guy I was growing to know, into something dark and cold.
Leaning over in his seat, his eyes remained glued to mine. “Do you honestly think that I would have risked my fucking life to save you if I didn’t give a shit?” he challenged. “Do you think I’d even be here at all?”
“Then why do you?” I whispered. “You barely know me.”
He released a humorless laugh before straightening himself in his seat and putting the vehicle into motion again. “I guess that’s the million-dollar question, isn’t it?”
We were both silent as we waited for the gate to open and pulled out onto the road. His words bounced around in my brain as I mulled them over. It was obvious he cared. Even I wasn’t stupid enough to overlook that, but I didn’t know why he did. No one else has ever given a fuck about me, and no one else would have ever put their life on the line for mine. So, why did he?
These were questions I’d probably never get the answers to, so there was no sense in dwelling on them. Instead, I asked, “where are we going?”
“Nowhere specific. You’ve been through a lot today; thought you’d enjoy the drive.”
For the first time in what felt like forever, warmth filled me. And not from the heater. It was weird having someone think of me and what they thought I needed. Even if it was just a friend. Raven and Gia never had the chance, considering where we were, but they always made sure I ate. So that was something.
As fast as the heat consumed me from the inside out, it was immediately iced out when Raven invaded my mind. Her lifeless body would forever be engraved into my mind. The thought that Gia would have to mourn us both by herself also weighed heavily on me. Hopefully Jax would take care of her.
I’ve been abandoned, raped, beaten, assaulted, and nearly killed. Somehow, I was still standing. My best friend died defending me, and the least I could do was keep her from dying in vain. I refused to let depression consume me. I had plans, and they didn’t involve me laying in bed sleeping the days away.
“She was wrong, you know,” he began.
My face twisted in confusion. “What?”
“Caroline. She was wrong about you. You’re none of those things, and neither am I. I saw the look on your face when the words left her mouth. It looked like they hit a nerve.” His gaze flickered to meet mine and I chewed on my lip thoughtfully.
“Was she though?” I asked. “It’s not like I have much going for me right now.”
He blew out a breath of air. “Those are your insecurities talking. You’re so much more than you know, Aspen. Don’t let someone like her contort your perception of yourself.”
She didn’t contort anything. I already thought those things about myself; she just validated my fears. It made it feel more real when they rolled off her tongue, like other people saw it too or something. Of course, I wasn’t going to tell him that. What was the point anyways?
We rode around for the next hour before Monroe called his phone freaking out. Despite being yelled at, Rocky was calm and made a mockery of the whole thing.
“Yes, I’ll have her back soon, Dad. Bye.” He said into the phone with a smirk. Rolling his eyes, he hung up and placed it in his lap.
“I can’t go back there,” I snapped. There would be way too much tension and drama now that everything was out in the open. I didn’t want to live like that. Plus, Caroline had made it very clear that she didn’t want me there.
A look of pity flashed across his face, which just annoyed me more. I’d be homeless for all I cared. There was no way I was going back there.
“How about this,” he started, glancing over at me again. “We spend a couple of nights in a hotel so that you’ve both had space from one another, and I’ll bring you back Friday evening before dinner.”
To say I was surprised by his offer would be an understatement. It wasn’t like the academy would be missing me, for all they knew, I was dead. There wasn’t a reason for me to say no. There was still no way I was going back there, but at least this gave me a couple days to figure it out.
“I would really like that, Rocky. Thank you.”
A slow smile stretched across his face, and he nodded. I couldn’t help but stare at his dimples as he grinned. This boy was the epitome of perfection. I wondered why he was at the academy. He seemed so put together, like he was kind and selfless. Then again…was anyone truly kind and selfless? The thought that this could all just be a mask weighed heavily on me.
“What about school?” I questioned. Just because I didn’t have classes, didn’t mean that he didn’t.
He shrugged. “Let me worry about that.”
The drive to whatever hotel we were going to was a lot longer than I’d expected. I couldn’t count how many times I nearly fell asleep in the car. Finally, we pulled up to a giant, white building with balconies adorning every window aside from the first floor.
Turning to look at me, he ran a hand through his shaggy, brown hair. Even through the black hoodie he was wearing, I could see his muscles flex with the movement.
“I’m going to go get checked in,” he explained. “In thirty minutes, I want you to come in after me. Lock the car and bring the keys.”
My breath caught in my throat as confusion swept through me. “You’re trusting me with your car?” I asked in astonishment.
“Is there a reason I shouldn’t?”
His question confused me even more. I came from a place where you couldn’t trust anyone around you. Why would he even risk it? We barely knew each other, and I’m sure he’s already caught on to the fact that I wasn’t very stable. Slowly, I shook my head. Even if I wasn’t sure I could trust myself.
Rocky’s mouth tilted into a smirk before he stepped out of the car and made a beeline for the hotel. My heart raced as I sank back into my seat, my gaze snagging on the keys that hung from the ignition.
It would be so easy.
I could leave here and start somewhere else. Have a real fresh start. It’s not like anything was holding me back. I’d get my GED, get a job somewhere, and then find my sister. My chest lightened at the idea. All of this would just become a bad dream—like it never happened.
Sighing, all the baggage I kept buried away filled my lungs once more. But I couldn’t. Because something was holding me back.
Revenge.
When I made it to the right room, keys in hand, I rapped on the door. I wasn’t sure why he’d made me wait outside for him, but it wasn’t relevant, so asking about it wasn’t a priority. The door swung open, and I didn’t miss the surprise on his face as our gazes clashed.
“What?” I said dryly as I shouldered past him into the room.
My lips parted in shock as I took in the view. A giant king-sized bed took up the center of the room, covered in black comforter. Across the room was a dresser beneath a decent sized flat-screen TV. Then of course, the bathroom and balcony.
“Why didn’t you run?” he whispered, coming up to stand behind me. The heat from his body radiated off him, almost making me want to lean into it. But I refrained.
“I thought about it,” I admitted.
Turning to face him, I extended my arm, holding out the keys. His gaze drifted down to where they sat within my palm, and with reluctance, he took them. His jaw ticked like something was bothering him and then he ran a hand through his hair like he had when were in the car.
“That doesn’t answer my question.”
I didn’t know what he wanted me to say. It was an odd question to begin with. Almost like he wanted me to leave. “It’s not important,” I muttered, sidestepping him, and drifting over to the bed. “I’m tired.”
He released a sigh and nodded. “Okay. I need to call Monroe really quick to let him know what’s going on,” he explained. “He’s been blowing me up.”
I snorted at that. No surprise there. “I don’t know why he even cares. All I’m doing is causing more problems for him.” I took a seat on the edge of the bed, lost in my thoughts. Maybe Monroe felt obligated to help me since I was pretty much dumped in his lap.
“He’s not just going to leave you on the streets. Monroe might be an asshole, but at least he has morals.” I didn’t say anything as he pulled his phone out of his pocket and slid up on the device. Within seconds it was against his ear.
I’m sure Monroe did have morals, but if all I was doing was causing even more problems, then I didn’t want to inconvenience him. The gesture was thoughtful, but…I had other options. Maybe I could just go back to the academy like nothing happened. It would probably be a death sentence, but I’d be smarter about my decisions from here on out. Or…I could find a strip club willing to take me on. That thought wasn’t as appealing considering all the bruises and cuts still marring my skin. I just hoped their names didn’t turn into scars.
“We’re at a hotel.” Rocky’s voice cut through my thoughts, pulling me back to reality. “Because.” He huffed, growing agitated. “She didn’t want to deal with Caroline anymore tonight.”
Amusement filled me as I watched the scene unfolding before me. It was funny, and weird. Monroe was acting like my dad or some shit, and Rocky was keeping me past curfew. Not that I’d ever know what that actually felt like, but this was probably as close to it as I’d get.
“I’ll have her back Friday—” his sentence came to a halt, probably due to Monroe cutting him off. “Nothing bad is going to happen.” He sighed. “We aren’t even in town right now.”
A breath of laughter fluttered past my lips, causing Rocky’s gaze to slide over to me. He narrowed his eyes which only made me laugh harder. The sound felt foreign to my ears. When was the last time I’d even laughed? I couldn’t recall. But it felt nice. By the time he was off the phone, my face ached from laughing. The feeling unfortunately faded out though as fast as it had come.
“Next time, you’re talking to him,” Rocky murmured, placing his phone face down on the nightstand.
“But you did such a good job,” I mocked. “It’s only fair that you keep doing it.” For the first time in…I don’t even know how long, I felt light. Maybe this small getaway was exactly what I needed.
He rolled his eyes. “I thought you said you were tired.”
“I am. I just have a lot on my mind.” I regretted the words as soon as they were uttered, even more so when a look of concern flashed across his features.
Shrugging off his hoodie, he let it fall to the floor. His muscles strained against the black T-shirt he wore, causing my mind to conjure up dirty images. Images that I shouldn’t even be thinking about. Rocky was too good of a guy for me. He didn’t need to get caught up in my world. Well…more than he already was.
He lowered himself onto the bed beside me, the heat from his body potent as we sat side by side. “What’s on your mind?” he asked carefully, probably afraid I’d choose to keep it to myself.
“Everything. I don’t know what to do from here. There’s a part of me that wants to skip town and never look back, and then there’s an even bigger part of me that wants revenge for the things that have happened.” The words flew from my mouth effortlessly, almost as if I couldn’t contain them any longer.
His hand found mine, the action making me tense momentarily. I watched as his thumb swept across the back of it, rubbing soothing circles. It was an odd gesture, but it seemed to calm me somewhat.
“What’s stopping you from getting revenge?” he asked, lacing our fingers together. His gaze remained fixated on our hands, and for some reason, that made talking to him easier.
I shrugged. “I wouldn’t even know where to start.”
With my shit luck, I’d just get myself killed. For real this time. This was something that needed to be planned out accordingly. I couldn’t just walk into the academy and expect things to be different than the last time I was there. Anything could go wrong.
He hummed softly as he thought. “You’d want to start with the weakest link,” he muttered. “Who would that be?”
The weakest link. That was easy. He didn’t even look like he fit in with them. There was something softer about him and it was something I really admired at first. But then…things changed.
“Collin…” I trailed off.
He nodded. “Agreed. He’s been walking around the halls like someone shot his grandma. It’s safe to say, he feels really guilty about what transpired that night.”
“Good,” I bit out. He deserved to feel that way. He deserved to feel much worse than that. His guilt didn’t bring Raven back, and had I actually died, it wouldn’t bring me back either.
I wanted him to suffer. He was just as much at fault for everything. He also took part in fucking raping me. His actions were unforgivable. They were heartless when they acted. All of them were. Raven’s blood stuck to me like paint as they took what they wanted from me. My body might have reacted, but my feelings remained the same. And for that, they’d all pay.
“I’ll help you,” Rocky said suddenly, slicing through my thoughts. “I’ll help you prepare; I’ll help you plan. Whatever you need.”
I didn’t know why he wanted to help me but turning him down would be stupid. The last time I turned his help away, I suffered the consequences for it. Luckily, he was still there to save the day. I’d underestimated him before, but I wouldn’t make that mistake again.
“Thank you,” I whispered, truly meaning it. For the first time in a long time, it felt like there was finally hope.
He smiled. “Don’t mention it. Why don’t you get some rest, and we’ll talk about this some more tomorrow.”
He was right. Exhaustion clung to me, weakening my thought process along with my body. In order to think rationally, I’d need to be well rested. I was just happy I wouldn’t have to do this alone. Contempt filled me as I situated myself on the bed. My eyes were already heavy, begging for sleep. Pulling the thick comforter over me, my head hit the soft, fluffy pillow.
Rocky stood from the bed and unfastened his jeans. I swallowed as he pushed them down his legs and stepped out of them. His navy-colored boxers clung to his thighs and an impressive bulge revealed itself.
When he caught me staring, heat enveloped me. Usually, I wasn’t one to get embarrassed easily, but something shifted between us. We were on the same page about exacting revenge against the people who had wronged me. I’m sure he had his own reasons for wanting them to pay considering they didn’t get along either, but we had an understanding.
“I can’t sleep in jeans,” he explained. “This trip was a little unexpected. I can crash on the couch over there.” He motioned to a small couch on the far side of the room—one I must have missed because I hadn’t seen it before.
I rolled my eyes. “Don’t be an idiot. The bed is big enough; just stay on your side and we’ll be good.”
“I knew you couldn’t wait to get me into bed.” He winked. I snorted at that but didn’t bother to comment. There definitely wouldn’t be any funny business going on between us. Especially not to tonight.
He strode across the room and flicked the lights off. Before I knew it, the bed was dipping beneath his weight as he crawled beneath the comforter. It felt weird having someone in bed with me. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever had a guy in bed. Most of my hookups were quickies and happened in cars, against buildings, in the woods, on the ground, etc.
My thoughts died out as a yawn erupted from my throat. With every passing moment, sleep grew nearer and nearer.
The next day, I awoke to the light bleeding in through the thin curtains. For a place as luxurious as this, you’d think they’d purchase quality curtains for their suites. My head felt ten times lighter than it had yesterday, and I was actually looking forward to what today had in store.
Pulling myself into a sitting position, I turned my head. A frown tugged at the corners of my mouth upon realizing that the bed was empty aside from me.
Where the fuck could he have gone?
I didn’t know Rocky well, but I doubted that he’d just leave me stranded here. Instead of dwelling on it, I climbed out of the bed and made my way over to the window overlooking the balcony. Two chairs sat outside, facing the view of the pool. I could only hope to have a house so nice one day that it came with a pool, or even a balcony. I doubted that anything luxurious was in my future though. This was probably the nicest I’d get to it.
My thoughts were cut short when the bedroom door opened and closed, drawing my attention to it. Rocky strode inside wearing yesterday’s clothes, a brown bag between his hands.
He smirked as he took in my appearance, but I didn’t have it in me to give a shit this morning. There were too many other things on my mind. Like getting revenge for starters. That seemed to be at the forefront of my brain lately.
“Hope you’re hungry,” he said, moving over to the small table near where I stood. He placed the bag on the surface and slipped into one of the two chairs.
“That depends…what’s in the bag?”
He reached inside and pulled out two Styrofoam boxes. He placed one in front of the vacant spot where I’d be sitting and then one in front of him. Hesitantly, I moved over to join him, slipping into the empty seat.
My hands clasped onto the edge of the box, and I opened it. Steam erupted from the contents, the smell roaming throughout the room. A pile of biscuits and gravy took up the majority of the box with a small bag of tater tots resting in the righthand corner.
“Here,” he said, holding out a plastic fork.
I accepted it graciously and didn’t hesitate before digging in. The hot gravy melted against my tongue and a moan of approval slipped past my defenses, but I didn’t give a shit. This tasted like heaven.
We both ate in silence and when we were through, Rocky got to work fixing us both a cup of coffee. This was the pick-me-up I so desperately needed. Blowing on the hot beverage, I waited until it was cool enough to sip on. When it finally was, I inhaled my first mouthful.
“I know you probably don’t want to go through this all over again,” he began, capturing my attention. “But in order for me to be able to help you, I’m going to need to know everything they did.”
My chest tightened as memories flooded my head. I didn’t want to relive any of it, but he was right. There was something about Rocky that just made me feel like I could trust him, and I’ve never been able to trust anyone. Maybe it was due to the fact that he saved my life. Whatever the reason, the least I could do was talk to him about it. Especially if he was willing to help me. I knew that getting revenge wouldn’t solve all my problems, but it was a start.
Blowing out a breath of air, I nodded and started from the beginning. When I first met Myles and the threats he’d made. By the time my story had ended, his tan skin had somehow paled.
“You’ve been through a lot, sweetheart.”
“You’re telling me,” I muttered.
He pursed his lips thoughtfully. His gray eyes glazed over as the wheels in his head turned. Rocky looked sexy as fuck when he was lost in thought, and I didn’t even think he knew just how attractive he was, which only made him that much more attractive.
“Okay,” he finally said. “We’ll need to determine their weak spots. We already know what Collin’s is, but the other three are harder to read, but I’ll see what I can find out.”
My face twisted into confusion at that. “And what is Collin’s weak spot?” I asked skeptically. None of them seemed to have any from what I knew of them. They were all so angry and cold.
“He wears his heart on his sleeve for one. He has a fear of abandonment which is why he’s kept Madison around for so long. He’s obsessive, which explains why he flipped shit when he saw you and Hunter together, and while he might seem like a bad guy, the dude does have a heart. He’s easily influenced by his friends. The one thing that would truly break him, is if he ended up alone and if they turned their backs on him.”
I didn’t say anything as I mulled over what he was suggesting. They seemed like a family. Tearing them apart sounded impossible. Sighing, I took another sip of my coffee. The hot liquid slid down my throat with ease and made me feel a little better for some reason.
“I don’t know how the fuck I’m going to manage that,” I admitted, wracking my brain for possible ideas.
A slow smile stretched across his face. “I do.” He took a long pull of his beverage, an evil glint in his eyes. I raised my eyebrows for confirmation, silently urging him to finish that sentence. “Make him fall for you.”