Chapter 18
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Ry smiled at the chaos all around her. The tour of The Refuge with Caroline had gone really well. The other woman was funny and down to earth. She’d loved meeting all the animals at the barn and had even gotten down on her knees in the dirt to meet one of the new goats that had been born recently.
By the time Ry dropped her off at the cabin where she and Wolf were staying, it felt as if they’d been friends for years rather than just meeting an hour earlier.
They were now sitting at tables in the lobby of the lodge, eating dinner, while everyone laughed and talked loudly. Tiny was on her right, and they were sitting with Tonka, Henley, and his friend he’d served with, Raiden, and his wife, Khloe.
Raid, as he’d asked to be called, was huge. He towered over everyone. He said he was six feet, eight inches tall. Khloe was tiny compared to him, but somehow her personality made her seem much bigger. Raid’s bright red hair made him stick out almost as much as his height. But he was so gentle, and when he’d taken Tonka’s tiny daughter into his arms, Ry’s eyes actually teared up.
She knew all about what these two men had been through with their service K9s. It was horrific, and so damn sad. But both seemed to be happy now, which Ry was grateful for. She silently swore to do a search as soon as she could for anyone associated with the asshole who’d hurt the two men and their dogs, and make sure karma was taking care of them.
This bloodthirsty side of her was new, but she was discovering that the thought of anyone messing with those she loved was unbearable.
Jasna was sitting at a different table with her friend Sharyn and the little girl’s mom. Brick’s mom was also at that table, along with Lara and Owl.
Cora and Pipe were sharing a table with their four foster children, and Cheri Singleton and her daughter. Cheri used to babysit Jasna. The older woman had four-year-old Max on her lap and was entertaining him with games on a piece of yarn she’d woven through her fingers.
Wolf and Caroline were sitting with Reese and Spike, and her brother and Isabella.
Stone and Maisy were at a table with Brick and Alaska, and Paige. Paige was the woman who’d basically raised Maisy, and was the closest thing she had to a mother.
All in all, the mood in the room was joyous. Alaska had insisted that Robert make this meal a buffet, so he could sit and eat with everyone else and wouldn’t have to be running back and forth to the kitchen all night. All the other Refuge employees were there as well, although they’d be heading out to their homes after dinner.
A big bonfire would take place once it got dark, so everyone could continue to hang out before heading to bed and meeting back up for brunch the next day, then Alaska and Brick’s wedding ceremony. Afterward, they would have another buffet dinner, then dancing. All the tables and chairs would be pushed toward the edge of the lobby, and Jason had volunteered to be their DJ. Apparently, he was more than just their maintenance man; he worked as a DJ in a small club in Los Alamos on the weekends.
“You look happy,” Tiny said in her ear.
Ry took a moment to reflect on his words, before turning to him with a smile. “I am. I think this is the first time in my life I’m not worrying about what tomorrow will bring. I used to stress about what my father would ask me to do, who he’d want me to steal from, and then after I left, I was constantly on alert and on the move, always afraid he’d find me. But now? I’m not thinking about anything other than how fun this is. How happy I am for Alaska and Brick. And how being around so many happy people makes me happy by osmosis.”
Tiny squeezed their clasped hands, resting on his thigh. “I’m glad.”
“Me too,” she agreed.
Talk at the table turned to Khloe, and her job as a veterinarian in their small town in Virginia. She talked about some of her clients—the ones with fur, not their human owners. Then she bragged about her husband, how Raid had started a Dungeons and Dragons club at the library he managed, and how popular it was.
Ry wouldn’t have pegged the man as a D&D nerd, but then again, most people wouldn’t ever guess that she could hack into the President of the United States’ email without anyone being the wiser. It drove home the fact that everyone had hidden talents and passions…it didn’t make them more or less likable. It just was .
Slowly, people began to leave the lodge after eating. The plan was for those who wanted to attend the bonfire to reconvene at the firepit around sunset. Ry had volunteered for kitchen duty, making sure Alaska was nowhere near any dirty dishes. This was her wedding week, and everyone was determined she’d work as little as possible and enjoy every second of her unplanned vacation.
Tiny—along with Luna, Maisy, and Paige—helped. Ry had tried to shoo Paige out, but she told Ry and the others in no uncertain terms that she’d spent her life in a kitchen, and it was one of the places she felt the most comfortable. After that, no one had the heart to make her leave.
The dishes were cleaned in no time, the lobby of the lodge swept and the tables and chairs straightened for brunch in the morning. As Ry was walking to the firepit to assist before the others arrived, she once more reflected on how different her life was now, than when she was on the run from her father.
Choosing The Refuge had been a stroke of luck. She’d not only found a place to hide out—and money she’d earned legally—but she’d inadvertently discovered the place she was always meant to be. She’d never be an outdoor girl, but she’d learned to appreciate the silence, the fresh air…and was learning to tolerate the bugs.
“What’s that smile for?” Tiny asked as they walked hand-in-hand toward the property’s designated bonfire area .
“It’s weird how life works, isn’t it?” she said somewhat cryptically.
“Absolutely,” Tiny agreed. “If anyone had told me when I’d first stepped foot on this property that years later, this is where I’d still be, I would’ve laughed in their face. There was nothing here but trees. I thought it was beautiful, but also kind of lonely. I didn’t think in a million years that The Refuge would actually work. Sure, I wanted it to succeed, but I didn’t think anyone would pay big bucks to come out to the middle of nowhere, where there were no fast food restaurants nearby, and not even internet at the time, to try to heal their souls.
“And never, ever would I have believed us confirmed bachelors would be married. And Tonka and Spike with babies?” Tiny shook his head. “Nope. I would’ve laughed like crazy at anyone who’d suggested there was the possibility.”
“I know. I feel the same. I mean, not about your friends, but about myself. When I left my dad, I was scared to death. I was na?ve and had no idea how to live on my own. He was a horrible person and father, but he paid the bills, ordered the food…he did everything. And I was so scared. Scared that he’d find me, hurt me for stealing his money, but more than that, I think I was scared of people in general.”
She stopped on the path and turned to Tiny. She leaned against him, looking up into his eyes. “All my life, I’d been told I was stupid. Pathetic. That I couldn’t do anything right. I had no friends, and no clue how to make them. I was the weird kid, and I grew into a weird adult. I didn’t make eye contact with anyone, stuck to myself. But eventually that got lonely. I mean, I liked being on my own for the first time ever…eating what I wanted, when I wanted, reading whatever books I wanted…all the things adults do when they live alone. But I also began to crave companionship. I didn’t want to get a pet, because I moved too much and that wouldn’t be fair to the animal. It’s one of the reasons why I wanted this job. I could talk to people a little during the day, then go back to my apartment at night.
“I never expected people to actually like me. To want to be around me. First it was Jess and Carly. Then it was the other employees. Including Alaska. And Henley. And as the others came to The Refuge, them too. Then there was you…
“I was drawn to you from the start. But I knew I wasn’t a good person. Didn’t deserve you. You were a hero, this larger-than-life SEAL, and you already know I hadn’t spent any time around men before. I had no idea how to be the kind of woman you might be attracted to.”
“I wanted you too,” Tiny told her. “There was something about you that drew me in the second I saw you. I could tell you were hiding something, but I convinced myself I was imagining it. That I was letting my past color my feelings. And when I found out my instinct was not only correct, but your secret was something bigger than I ever could’ve dreamed, I closed myself off. I’m sorry for that, hon. So sorry.”
But Ry shook her head. “Don’t be. I think we had to go through what we did for us to end up where we are now.”
“No,” Tiny disagreed. “There was no reason for me to be a dick to you for as long as I was. I treated you like shit, and you didn’t deserve that. ”
“Tiny,” Ry protested, but he pulled her closer, until their upper bodies were plastered together.
“You didn’t,” he said firmly. “Your father was wrong. You aren’t stupid, you aren’t ugly. You aren’t anything he said you were. He was purposely trying to make you feel worthless, keep you under his thumb, doing what he couldn’t do. You’re a shining light, Ryleigh. The type of woman anyone would want to be friends with. Unselfish, giving, and so damn kind it makes me feel like an ogre.”
Ry chuckled. “Whatever, Jake Ryan.”
It was Tiny’s turn to roll his eyes. “Look at you, sweetheart. You haven’t slowed down for a minute. You gave Caroline a tour, helped Robert and Luna set up the buffet, cleaned the kitchen, straightened the lodge, and now here you are, going to help make sure things are all good to go for the bonfire. And that’s just today. I’m sure tomorrow you’ll be just as busy, running around making sure everyone else is happy and comfortable.”
“Well, of course. It’s Alaska and Brick’s day. I want it to be perfect for them.”
“It will be. Even if a freak snowstorm blows through, the chairs all break, and the food suddenly goes bad. Because they’ll be together. Because Brick will get to marry the woman he loves, and Alaska will finally get to call the man she’s loved her entire life her husband. All the other stuff…it’s just noise. It doesn’t matter. Except for being surrounded by friends. That’s the best gift they could have.”
Ry loved that he thought that way. She’d learned the hard way that money didn’t buy happiness. Her father proved that. She smiled up at Tiny and nodded.
“I’m going to marry you,” he said bluntly. “One of these days, we’re going to go down to the courthouse and do it. A small ceremony, no frills, no fuss. Unless you want a big party, then I’ll give you the biggest party The Refuge has ever seen.”
Ry smiled up at him. “No, I don’t want a party. I just want you.”
“So, you’ll marry me?”
Ry blinked. “Wait, was that a proposal?”
Tiny smirked. “It was if you say yes.”
“And if I don’t?”
“Then it wasn’t a proposal. Yet.”
Ry loved this man. So damn much. “I’d marry you today if I could,” she admitted. “But it’s only been a week.”
“Wrong. I think we’ve both known we were headed here from the first time we saw each other. It’s been months. We’ve just had to work through some stuff before we got our heads out of our butts.”
Ry snorted. “Stuff. Yeah.” Then she sobered. “I don’t know how to be a wife.”
“Do you love me?” Tiny asked.
“Yes.” There was no hesitation in her response.
“And I love you. I’m not sure I know how to be a husband, but together, I think we can figure it out. I’m sure we’ll make mistakes along the way, but that’s part of life. Of being a couple.”
She liked that philosophy. If he’d said their lives would be perfect, she probably would’ve felt uneasy. But knowing he expected there to be bumps in their road made her feel less stressed about the whole thing. “Okay.”
“Okay what?” Tiny asked with a small furrow in his brow.
“I’ll let you marry me. ”
He chuckled at that, and his eyes seemed to sparkle. She felt him grow hard against her belly. “Maybe we should go to our cabin and celebrate our betrothal.”
She giggled. “Our betrothal? Who says that?”
“I have no idea,” he admitted.
“We said we’d help with the fire,” she reminded him.
He sighed dramatically. “Fine. You’re such a hard taskmaster.”
Ry’s smile grew. “Yup.”
The grin faded from Tiny’s expression. One hand came up to cup the side of her face. “I love you, Ryleigh Lodge. Exactly how you are. Genius computer hacker, generous friend, protector of everyone here at The Refuge. I want to spend the rest of my days learning everything there is to know about you and watching you blossom.”
“Tiny,” she murmured, trying desperately to hold back the tears that had welled in her eyes.
“Don’t cry,” he ordered. “This is a happy moment.”
“Sorry, I know,” she said with a wobbly smile. “I love you too. And I have no idea why in the world you want to marry me, a weirdo who would rather sit inside in front of a computer than anything else, but I’ll always put you first. I’ll be a woman you can trust to sleep by your side and protect you from anyone who might dare to touch one hair on your head.”
Tiny leaned down and kissed her lips lightly.
They stood like that, wrapped in each other’s arms for several minutes, until Jasna went running past them yelling, “Hurry up, slowpokes! We’re gonna have s’mores!”
Tiny chuckled and pulled back. “Guess that’s our cue to get our butts in gear.”
“Guess so,” Ry agreed .
As they started for the fire grounds, Tiny said nonchalantly, “We can go shopping for a ring next week.”
“I don’t need a ring,” Ry said.
“Well, I’m getting you one, so get used to it. I want everyone who sees your finger to know you’re taken.”
Ry wanted to point out that it wasn’t as if people were beating down her door to date her, or that anyone other than him had ever shown the slightest interest in her. And , she didn’t want anyone but him…but she couldn’t deny she wanted to wear his ring. “Will you wear one too? I mean, when we get married?”
“Hell yeah, I’m wearing one. I want everyone to know I belong to you.”
It was a good answer. No, it was an awesome answer.
She squeezed his hand as they walked. He glanced over and gave her a loving smile. “This is gonna work,” he said firmly. “I’m gonna make sure it does.”
They reached the ring of logs that sat around the property’s firepit.
“Over here!” Jasna called, gesturing them toward her. “We need to put the small sticks down first, then the bigger logs on top. Once it’s going, we can add more wood.” It was obvious the girl had absorbed everything about fire-starting from the camps she’d attended, and from all the bonfires they’d held at The Refuge.
“Go on, I’ll carry the logs so you don’t hurt your hands,” Tiny told her.
Ry went up on tiptoes and kissed him. “Thanks.”
“You don’t have to thank me for doing anything that might keep you from being hurt,” he returned, kissing her hard, then heading for the woodpile.
He was wrong. No one else in her entire life, including her father, had ever done anything to keep her from harm. Harold had actually put her in harm’s way. It was hard to get used to Tiny’s protection and care, but she liked it. A lot.