Chapter 9 #2
“Graeme Dallen,” Graeme shook her hand. “Disgraced, gay ex-husband of the bride and garden designer.”
Mrs. St. Ives’s expression went from imperious to puzzled to delighted within the space of a heartbeat.
“I’ve heard all the gossip about you in the last few days,” she said, much to Graeme’s dread.
“Came out as queer, jilted the bride after two years of marriage, and ran off with this one?” She nodded to Ryan.
“No!” Graeme said, far too loud. “I mean, I was married to Mavis, realized I was gay, and let her go so she could have the life she deserves. But this is not, er, the man who made me realize I was gay.”
Graeme couldn’t decide if he wanted to sink into the earth or laugh at how fast he’d spilled his sorry story to Mrs. St. Ives. There was something about her that hinted she wasn’t cut from the same cloth as his family, though.
“By the way,” she said with a sly look,” I overheard you expressing your displeasure about my gardens earlier.”
“Oh, God,” Graeme said, color draining from his face. “I didn’t know anyone else was around.”
“I am always around, Graeme Dallen,” she said.
Graeme wanted to make more of an apology, but Benny’s other brother, Daniel, tapped a microphone up under the archway of flowers, then said, “If you could all be seated, we’ll start the ceremony.”
“Sorry,” Graeme whispered to Mrs. St. Ives, jerking his head toward the back corner of the chairs.
“We’ll speak later,” Mrs. St. Ives said with a cunning look.
Graeme liked the woman, despite knowing her for all of two minutes. Her promise to speak to him later felt real, like she was genuinely interested in him. It might have been all the gossip she’d overheard.
Whatever the case, there was too much else going on for Graeme to think about it.
He and Ryan moved to the last two seats in the very back row and sat.
More people shot him nasty looks as they, too, took seats, and by the time everyone was in their chairs, there was an empty space next to him where no one would sit, and Mavis’s neighbor, Mrs. Pettifer, plunked herself down in front of them with a hat the size of a coracle.
None of the treatment surprised Graeme. He tugged nervously at the hem of his sleeves and wished he could hold Ryan’s hand through the whole thing.
He didn’t know why he’d agreed to attend the wedding in the first place except that he felt as if he owed it to Mavis to give her what she wanted on her big day. Her second big day. Her real big day.
Mavis was beautiful, though. As soon as she made her appearance and walked down the aisle between folding chairs, no one had a thought or glare to spare for Graeme.
Graeme wasn’t sure if she’d seen him sitting there, but it didn’t really matter.
Her eyes were for Benny alone as he and his brothers stepped up at the front of the aisle.
It was clear to everyone that Mavis and Benny were totally in love.
That was how it should be. As the ceremony commenced, Graeme found himself far more moved than he expected to be.
He almost cried. As horrible and painful as everything had been for the two of them when it all fell apart, Mavis had landed on her feet.
This was the reason Graeme had called it all off as soon as he knew about himself.
This was the reason he’d defied everyone who said it was his duty to stay married to Mavis no matter what.
He would never be able to look at her the way Benny did as the vicar joined the two of them in holy matrimony.
Their marriage would be what marriage was supposed to be.
“Are you alright?” Ryan leaned close to ask him fifteen minutes later, once the bride and groom had made their way back down the aisle, beaming and blowing kisses, and the bulk of the congregation had followed them across to the marquee where music was already playing.
“Yeah,” Graeme said with a sigh and a smile, standing. “I’m more than alright. Everything worked out as it should in the end.”
Ryan smiled at him, and despite what anyone might think, he reached for and squeezed his hand, then continued to hold it for a few steps as they followed the stragglers to the marquee.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
Graeme’s sense of peace and rightness was shattered before they even made it to the marquee when his brother, Lionel, came rushing out to block their path.
“Hi, Lionel,” Graeme tried to greet him as if nothing were wrong and they were still brothers. They’d been close once. “Ryan, this is my brother, Lionel.”
“Pleased to—”
“How dare you show your face around decent people?” Lionel cut Ryan off without even looking at him. “No one wants a degenerate pervert like you around.”
Being insulted more or less behind his back by Mavis’s cousins and confronted by Mavis’s mum was one thing. Having that sort of vitriol hurled at him by his own brother was a blow he wasn’t expecting.
“Is the whole family here?” he asked, voice shaking, fighting to ignore Lionel’s anger.
“Yes, they are,” Lionel said, crossing his arms and continuing to block Graeme’s path into the marquee. “We had to be. Because of you, we’ve had to bend over backwards to make amends for your sinful treatment of Mavis.”
Graeme was speechless. Just like he’d said to Ryan about Mrs. Munroe earlier, there wasn’t a single, useful argument to make against the sort of things Lionel said. No one was going to change their mind, and fighting would only exhaust him, like it had back in the fall.
He was saved from being drawn into something he didn’t want to be in when Mavis herself came marching out of the marquee. “Is there a problem here?” she asked Lionel in a high, squeaky voice.
“Yes, him,” Lionel said. “I’m sorry, Mavis. I don’t know who let him in.”
“I did,” Mavis said, crossing her arms and tilting her chin up defiantly. “I invited Graeme.”
“You what?” Lionel didn’t look happy.
“Graeme and I shared some very important years together, and I wanted him here today,” she insisted. “I don’t care what the rest of you think, I’m an ally now.”
Out of the corner of his eye, Graeme saw Ryan roll his eyes. He wasn’t sure that was entirely justified. Mavis was trying, which was a lot more than anyone else in the world they’d come from could say. He knew she was a good person, and he was willing to give her the benefit of the doubt.
“What’s going on out here?”
A second later, Benny joined the confrontation.
“Did you okay her letting him come to the wedding?” Lionel asked, not bothering to actually name the woman or the gay.
“Yes,” Benny said, facing Lionel like he was ready to fight him. “You got a problem with that?”
“A problem with a guy who let these queers come to a wedding like this?” Lionel moved to stand square with Benny.
“I think that’s enough of that,” Ryan said as calmly as possible. “Mavis, it was lovely to meet you. Benny, congratulations on your marriage. Graeme?” He glanced at Graeme with eyebrows raised.
The moment felt horribly significant for Graeme.
There he stood, just outside the marquee that held his former friends and family, the community he came from.
He would only ever be able to look inside without actually going there ever again.
He knew most of the faces that were smiling and laughing, eating and drinking, all without him now. They weren’t a part of him anymore.
“Congratulations, Mavis,” he said, focusing on her alone. He even went to hug her, and thankfully, she let him. “I know you’re going to be so much happier now,” he whispered in her ear.
“I hope you’re happy, too,” Mavis whispered back, hugging him tightly, then letting go.
Everything was a bit of a blur from there as Graeme turned and walked away, heading back for the house.
He was aware of Ryan walking with him, but for that minute, for the space of time it took him to find his way inside the house and along the antique corridors to the room he and Ryan shared, he was alone.
And it was okay. He’d done something so many closeted gay men had never done.
He’d been true to himself, stood up for who he really was, and let go of the entire life that he’d lost. It had been the most painful thing he’d ever done, but in his heart, he knew there was a reward at the other end of all that pain.
“I’m sorry about all of that,” Ryan said once they were alone in their room. “If it helps, you handled it really well. I don’t think I would have been so calm as—”
“Kiss me,” Graeme interrupted him, stepping in front of him and grabbing the lapels of his suit jacket. “Just kiss me.”
Ryan didn’t say another word. He slipped his hands over Graeme’s shoulders and up his neck, then grasped his hair and pulled his head up so he could kiss him. Hard. More like Art had kissed him.
And it was glorious. Ryan’s mouth against his, his tongue swiping then pushing in to taste him deeply made Graeme feel like a fresh sprout pushing out from the dirt.
He worked through the buttons of Ryan’s jacket so he could spread his hands across the solid expanse of Ryan’s belly and sides.
Ryan was strong and warm, and Graeme wanted to uncover every part of him.
He continued kissing Ryan as best he could while tugging part of his shirt out of his trousers. Ryan did the same with him, frantically pushing his suit jacket off his shoulders, then going for the buttons of his shirt.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Ryan panted between kisses and tugs.
“Yes,” Graeme said, not a hint of hesitation in his voice.
Ryan moaned as if that were the best answer he’d heard all day.
He pulled Graeme’s shirt the rest of the way from his trousers, fumbled with the fastenings of those trousers, and when they were loose enough, he plunged his hand down into Graeme’s briefs to cup his balls, then to draw his cock out into the open.
It all went a bit mad from there as they kissed and touched, panting, gasping, and fondling.
Graeme wasn’t entirely sure how he ended up naked within minutes or how Ryan ended up kneeling between his spread legs on one of the narrow beds.
The bed was small enough and Graeme was big enough that his calves ended up hugging either side of the mattress while Ryan kissed him, his neck, his shoulder, his chest.
“You’re so beautiful,” Ryan whispered, his hard cock bobbing in front of him as he adjusted so he could kiss and worship Graeme’s body. “I noticed from the first time I saw you. I’ve wanted you like this since then.”
“I—” Graeme didn’t know what to say. He’d wanted Ryan, too, but he hadn’t known how to express that.
He felt like he wasn’t doing enough as Ryan worshiped his body with touches and kisses, igniting every nerve ending and making him feel like he was on fire.
Ryan licked and sucked at his nipples, which Graeme had never given much thought to before, then reached between his legs to tease the sensitive skin between his hole and his balls.
Just when Graeme was getting used to that sensation, Ryan moved again, bringing his mouth to the tender flesh of his inner thighs and both kissing and nipping at him.
Graeme lost track of the number of times he almost came without Ryan being anywhere close to his cock.
He had to reach up behind him to grip the brass bedframe as Ryan continued his onslaught.
Damien had never done anything close to this.
He hadn’t really kissed or touched or paid attention to anything other than Graeme’s dick or hole.
Ryan was making love to his whole person.
The contrast was so astounding that it nearly brought Graeme to tears.
This was what he’d wanted from the beginning, why he’d exploded his life so that he could build the one he was supposed to have on the rubble.
The way Ryan licked and nuzzled the seam between his leg and his hip had Graeme sweating with anticipation, and when Ryan finally did mouth one of his balls, sucking on it while tightening his grip on Graeme’s thighs, Graeme nearly screamed.
“So good,” he panted instead, although those words didn’t come anywhere close to expressing what he really felt. “I need—” He didn’t know what he needed. He needed their lovemaking to go on forever.
Ryan was worked up and out of patience, too.
The sound he made as he stroked Graeme’s cock a few times, pulling back his foreskin, then closing his mouth around his tip to lick the moisture there was downright feral.
All this time, Graeme had imagined Art would be the one who was good at sucking cock, but Ryan had him losing control in less than thirty seconds.
He cried out wordlessly and thrust on instinct as his orgasm started. Instead of being alarmed or disgusted by his spend, Ryan made a sound like it was the best thing he’d ever tasted as he sucked and swallowed. The pleasure of it was mind-blowing, but the intimacy of the act was even better.
Just when the sensation was becoming too much, Ryan pulled back with a wet pop, then straightened to a full kneel.
Graeme watched in sated awe as he circled a hand around his cock and stroked hard and fast. He looked like some kind of potent sex god as his breathing came faster and faster, then as he let out a moan and shot pearly cum all over Graeme’s belly.
He should have minded, shouldn’t he? He should have thought it was weird or gross to have a man come all over him.
Instead, he wanted Ryan to keep coming and coming until he was soaked in his spunk and thoroughly claimed.
There was something indescribably hot about Ryan’s seed all over him.
Wildly, it made him think about Art’s dick pic from earlier and what it would be like to have his cum all over him, too.
That thought didn’t last long in his brain. Ryan sagged once he was spent and sank on top of Graeme. They rolled to their sides, bodies sticky as they entwined, and once they had caught their breath a bit, they fell into long, sweet, tender kisses.
“That was amazing,” Graeme managed eventually, feeling heavy, warm, and sleepy.
“You’re amazing,” Ryan told him in return, stroking and caressing his body, all while their lips and tongues played lazily.
It lasted as long as they could keep it up, but exhaustion won in the end.
All Graeme wanted to do was cuddle with Ryan and fall asleep in his lover’s arms. That was how things were supposed to be, after all.
It was almost as sweet as Brighton, when the three of them were together, even though they’d been drunk.
For the first time in his life, Graeme was starting to see how wonderful his life could actually be.