21. Desire
Azaria must have beentired because she slept a lot later than usual. When I heard her little voice calling out for me, I found her sitting in her bed.
“Hi, Mommy. I hungry.”
“Good morning, sweet—what did you say?”
“I hungry, Mommy.”
I’d heard her correctly, but I was in disbelief. She called me Mommy, and it rolled off her tongue so naturally. My heart soared as I held back tears of happiness.
“I made pancakes.”
“Yay!”
I picked her up from the bed and wrapped my arms tightly around her tiny body. Her arms hugged my neck, and she kissed my cheek. Azaria was the sweetest little girl I’d ever encountered. If God didn’t see fit for me to birth children of my own, I’d be content showering her with all my love.
After washing her face and assisting her with brushing her teeth, we made our way downstairs to the kitchen. To my surprise, Tammy was seated at the breakfast bar.
“Uh, good morning,” I said, doing my best to check my attitude.
“Good morning. I have more important things to do, but your husband asked me to deliver this phone.” She reached into her bag and placed the box on the counter. “Are you incapable of getting your own phone?”
Ignoring her question, I said, “Thank you. I’ll walk you out. Ria, sit at the table. I’ll be back in a second to fix your plate.”
“Okay, Mommy.”
“Tuh! Did she just call you Mommy?”
“What she calls me is none of your business. Did you notice she didn’t call you anything? Baby girl didn’t even acknowledge your presence.”
“You’re loving this little ready-made family, aren’t you?”
“What’s not to love? I know you don’t think it’s real, but I don’t care what you think, nor does my husband. It’s time for you to go. I need to feed my daughter.”
I exited the kitchen and went to the front door. Tammy”s access to our home made me uncomfortable, and I would discuss changing the codes with Aziel immediately.
“You know, I wouldn’t get too comfortable if I were you. Aziel isn’t capable of loving a woman who isn’t related to him. Don’t say I didn’t warn you when he breaks your heart.”
I wanted to respond, but her words gave me pause—not because I believed them, but because they were familiar. When she was on the other side of the door, I secured it before leaning against it as I debated whether I should share my thoughts with Aziel.
After returning to the kitchen and making Azaria’s plate, I grabbed Aziel’s phone from the counter and called his work cell phone. He answered right after the first ring.
“You good, baby?”
“I’m fine. Tammy just left?—”
“Oh shit. What happened?”
“Nothing major, but she said something that got me thinking.”
“What’s that?”
I repeated to him, word for word, what Tammy had said before leaving our home.
“Doesn’t that sound familiar?” I asked.
“Damn, you think she’s the one sending the messages?”
“If she’s not, that’s one heck of a coincidence.”
“And you know I don’t believe in coincidences. Let me call Quinton. I’ll call you if there’s anything to report. I love you.”
“I love you—oh wait. Guess what?”
“What?”
“Ria called me Mommy this morning,” I told him excitedly.
“No shit. I knew it would happen soon. You good with it?”
“I told you yesterday how I felt about it. She almost had me in tears, baby. It rolled off her tongue so naturally. My heart damn near exploded.”
“Thank you for being so receptive, Desire. A mother was the only thing missing in my baby girl’s life; now she has one.”
“She has me for life, baby. Even if we don’t?—”
“Nah, don’t even say that shit because ain’t no backing out.”
“You’re right. I almost let your trifling assistant ruin my high. We need to change the codes because I don’t like how comfortable she is coming into my house unannounced.”
“I’ll send you the directions on how to change them. I gotta go. I love you,” he repeated.
“I love you, too.”
A text message came through as I placed his phone on the counter. I wasn’t the kind of woman who went through a man’s phone, but when I saw Tammy’s name, I didn’t hesitate to go to the text thread.
Tammy B: I regret suggesting you get married.
It didn’t take me long to decide I wanted to reply as Aziel and help her dig herself into a hole.
Me: How is my marriage affecting you?
Tammy B: It’s nothing like I planned. You weren’t supposed to fall in love.
Me: Your plans for my life don’t matter. I won’t have this conversation again.
Tammy B: We’ve known each other for years. Why won’t you consider my feelings?
Me: I will never consider you when it pertains to my personal life, especially my wife. I don’t know what the hell you think this is, but this ain’t that. Take the day off and get yourself together. This is your final warning. If you continue to speak on my personal life, you’ll have to find another job.
The bubbles appeared and disappeared a few times, but I guess she decided not to reply.
“Mommy, I finish. Can I have juice?”
“Of course, baby.”
I called Aziel while pouring juice into Azaria’s cup.
“You good?”
“I’m fine. I’m calling to let you know Tammy probably won’t return to work today.”
“Desire,” he said sternly, questioning my actions without actually asking a question.
“What? I didn’t do anything to her. Not directly.”
“Tell me what happened.”
“I told you we exchanged a few words before she left. Well, she doesn’t know I have your phone and thought it was appropriate to text you and talk shit.”
“And what did you do?”
“I replied as you and we exchanged a few texts. I ended up telling her to take the day off. I’ll send you the screenshots.”
“Nah, don’t even worry about it. I don’t want you to send them to my work cell. I’ll be home shortly to meet with Quinton. He has some information for us.”
We talked for a few more minutes before he had to take another call. Azaria had finished her juice and ventured into the family room. I found her on the couch playing with her dolls.
“Come on, Ria. Let’s get dressed.”
“Okay, Mommy.”
My heart swelled and would continue to do so for as long as she addressed me by that name. After we were dressed, we did her first lesson of the day. It took about an hour, and she began to get antsy, so we went outside to the backyard.
She played long enough to work up an appetite, and we went inside for lunch. There were enough stuffed bell peppers to have another full dinner, and just as we sat down to enjoy them, Aziel walked into the kitchen.
“Daaddyy,” Azaria sang as she always did when she saw her father. “Mommy make lunch.”
“Hey, baby girl. It smells good, too. Did you save some for Daddy?”
She nodded as he kissed her forehead before heading in my direction to do the same.
“We need a bell or something to put above the door. I don’t like being unable to hear when people come in.”
“I’ll get right on that, baby. I’ll change the codes, too. Is there enough for me?” he asked, referring to the food.
“There’s plenty. Let me make you a plate.”
“Nah, I can do it myself. Eat your food.”
He washed his hands at the kitchen sink and made himself a plate. He’d already taken a few bites when he sat down.
“You gotta make this again soon, baby. It’s good as hell.” His mouth was full as he complimented me.
“I’ll make it as often as you want, but I don’t want you to get sick of it.”
“I’ll let you know if that happens. Quinton should be here in about thirty minutes. Is baby girl going down for a nap soon?”
“As soon as she finishes lunch. Why?”
“Your cycle gone?”
“Az, we are not about to have sex before this man gets here.”
“Is your cycle gone or not?”
“Pretty much, but I said what I said. You can wait until he leaves or tonight.”
“It’s been days, baby. Do you know how much I miss feeling you wrapped around my di?—”
“Watch your mouth in front of my baby.”
He looked at Azaria, who’d just stuffed the last of her bell pepper in her mouth.
“Mommy, can I have juice?”
Aziel caught me smiling, and when I noticed him noticing me, I blushed.
“It’s like music to your ears, huh?”
“It sure is. I don’t think I’ll ever tire of hearing it.”
And that was the God’s honest truth.