Chapter 25
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Everleigh
Citizen Soldier - Make Hate To Me
M y hand shook as I applied my eyeliner, a mixture of rage and nervous energy prickling through me. I should text Ashton back and tell him to go to hell. But if that picture got back to the dean…
It wasn’t a good look. I was on scholarship, and the video of me and Lucas was already circulating. It was also more drama than it was worth. Amber would interrogate me, Lucas would freak out, and they’d both demand answers I didn’t have.
I put the cap back on my eyeliner and reached for my mascara. The brush was soft against my lashes and made them look longer and thicker than they were. My cherry lip gloss was the final step. I had no urge to do anything crazy with my hair, so I just ran a brush through the long black strands until I was satisfied with it.
I had no idea where we were going, so my outfit choice was a relatively safe one. Light blue skinny jeans with a short-sleeved top. It was loose, but still fit my figure nicely.
The front door slammed, causing me to startle. I stuffed my makeup back in the drawer before stepping out into the hallway. My breath hitched in my throat when my eyes landed on a pissed off Briley. Tears were streaming down her face, makeup running down her cheeks. She looked miserable. I shouldn’t even care—not after all the shitty things she’s been doing. But she was still my sister, so it was hard to cut her out completely.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
Briley scoffed. “Like you care.” She moved to grab the doorknob leading to our bedroom, but I reached for her arm, pulling her back before she could disappear.
“I do care.”
I had been a little pissed off that she didn’t come straight home after school. She didn’t even text me to tell me she was stopping somewhere else. I liked knowing where my vehicle was at all times, since it was our only form of transportation. But suddenly, none of that mattered. Clearly something happened to her, and that was more important.
Briley hesitated, and it pained me to see how miserable she looked. She sucked in a shaky breath, tears glistening in her eyes. “Ashton and Kash happened,” she murmured. “They broke up with me.” Her nose scrunched up, and I was wondering if something else had happened, but she didn’t say anything else.
“They’re assholes,” I murmured. “You’re better off without them anyway.”
She nodded. “Maybe?—”
A knock sounded at the door, bringing our conversation to a screeching halt. It wasn’t even five yet. Maybe it was one of those assholes coming to apologize to my sister for whatever they’d done to her. That thought left behind a bitter aftertaste. I should want them to grovel at her feet, to beg for her forgiveness, but it was difficult to want that given the circumstances.
“I’ll get it.” Briley sniffled, turning on her heels to head back to the living room.
I made my way back to my room and grabbed my cross-body purse, making sure my wallet was secured within it before making my way to the living room, too. Ashton was standing in the doorway, his gaze sweeping over my sister in a disinterested way. He was wearing a tight black shirt, paired with some black jeans. His top fit him well, showing off the ripples in his ribs along with all the muscle he’d gained over the last couple of years. His black hair was disheveled, strands sticking up in various places. But it made him look even more attractive and I hated it. His gray eyes moved past her, settling on me.
“Ready?” he asked.
Briley’s body tensed and she whirled around to face me, accusation and judgment written in her expression. She was staring at me like I was the one who betrayed her.
“Don’t look at me like that.” I sighed. “It’s not what it looks like.”
Ashton smirked as I approached. “Sure it is.” He pulled me into his arms despite my resistance. His musky scent invaded my nostrils instantly, and the familiarity of being in his embrace made me want to melt against him. To have him hold me like he used to. But those were different times, and we’d never have that again.
My hands flattened against his abdomen due to our height difference, and I tried to push away from him, but he just tightened his grip. He dropped his hands to squeeze my ass hard, making me buck against him.
“Get the hell off of me, Ashton,” I snapped.
Briley was seething, fresh tears trickling down her face. They literally dated for less than a week. I didn’t understand why she was so broken up over him. “I can’t believe you,” she snapped at me. I opened my mouth to try to explain this, but she was already running down the hall before I could even get my thoughts together.
“Happy?” I growled, shoving away from him. This time he let me go, and I nearly fell on my ass.
He smirked in response. “Very.”
Anger was pulsing through me along with the overwhelming urge to check on my sister. She didn’t deserve it. That was for sure. But I didn’t want to fall out with her over some stupid guy who meant absolutely nothing. She was my family. I’ve spent years taking care of her and standing by her side, I’ve spent years protecting her. It didn’t matter that she was being a selfish little brat. At the end of the day, she was the only family I really had left—aside from Tate and Emma. I wasn’t very close with my grandparents and didn’t want to burden them anymore than necessary. They were already helping out so much with my youngest siblings.
My chest felt light as my inner turmoil grew and grew. I was on the brink of erupting, so tired of these fucking games and life in general. Mom’s wake would be happening soon, I just made a deal with my sleazy landlord, Emma and Tate were living with Grams and Grandpa, Briley was mad at me, I had a ton of homework to catch up on, Ashton, Kash, and Jameson were hellbent on destroying me for something I’d done three years ago, Lucas was blowing me up, and I still hadn’t seen him since my kiss with Ashton. My house desperately needed cleaning, and I was supposed to work tonight to top it all off. I suppose I could just go in late and stay late, but that would leave me exhausted for school tomorrow.
My life was in complete shambles, and it was getting harder and harder to see the bright side of everything when things just kept getting worse.
I followed Ashton to his car, my heart in my throat as my mind reeled. A sleek black Challenger was parked behind my piece of shit vehicle. It was gorgeous. Vastly different from the truck he used to drive back in high school.
I slipped into the passenger seat, turning my head to peer out of the tinted window on my right. The vehicle was in good condition, and even had that new car smell just like Amber’s Benz did.
As nice as the car was, though, it was the last place I wanted to be. He’s made it abundantly clear that he hated me. His eyes remained fixed on the windshield as he backed out of my driveway and started down the road.
“Where are we going?” I asked, not bothering to keep the skepticism out of my voice.
“Family dinner.” He glanced over at me, probably trying to see my reaction, but I wasn’t about to give him the satisfaction. “Dakota will be there.”
My entire body went rigid at the mention of his brother. I hadn’t seen him since everything went to shit, and I had no desire to. My head was still so foggy from that afternoon.
“Why are you bringing me there?” I shook my head, trying to make sense of it all. Was this another attempt to get under my skin? It was working. “Is this some kind of test?”
“Nope.” He turned onto another street before drifting out onto the main road.
The last time I’d seen his mom, she hadn’t been happy to see me. In fact, she told me never to come back. This was going to cause all kinds of problems, but that seemed to be his goal, anyway. Not to mention…that house contained so many memories. Good ones at that. It was where me and Ash spent the majority of our time together, playing video games, playing soccer in his massive yard, and doing more…intimate things. I shuddered at the reminder, not wanting to think about that at all.
“Ashton,” I whispered, my voice trembling. He glanced over at me again, his eyes hard and vacant. “Please don’t make me go there.”
“Why not?” he mocked. “I thought you’d be thrilled to see your old-time fuck buddy. I hope the sex was worth it. I mean, for all the trouble it caused.”
I swallowed thickly, heat building behind my eyes. “I…he wasn’t,” I didn’t even know how to finish that sentence. It wasn’t like I could deny sleeping with Dakota. Even if it was a very distant memory—almost like a dream.
Ashton watched me for a moment, his features seeming to soften, revealing the old boy underneath the hard exterior he always wore, revealing the boy I’d fallen in love with all those years ago. The sudden change in his demeanor had my heart skipping in my chest. I hated that after all of this, I missed him. Missed what we used to have before it all got messed up. And it was my fault.
He’d told me that he loved me earlier that day. We were planning on meeting up after school like we usually did. But then I got the call from my mom and skipped school early. It had proven to be the biggest mistake of my life.
Ashton’s hands tightened around the steering wheel. “Why did you do it?” he finally asked after all this time, after all these years.
“I…I don’t know.” My teeth sunk into my bottom lip. It had been a question I’d asked myself on numerous occasions. But my mind drew a blank every time I tried thinking about it. It was like my subconscious was hiding it from me. No matter how hard I tried wracking my brain for the missing puzzle piece, it wouldn’t come forth. “Maybe I had too much to drink or something.” Even the words felt like a lie, but what else could it have been?
Ashton scoffed. “It’s hard to believe that you were able to drink so much that you blacked out within ten minutes, and then get fucked on top of it.”
He had a point. I texted him while I was in my car, heading toward his house. He told me he’d meet me there, and apparently, he didn’t waste any time. That just made things even more confusing. No wonder he was so pissed off.
“I don’t know what happened,” I confessed as we neared the south side. “I honestly don’t remember.”
His features hardened again, clearly not satisfied with my answer. “I’m not Jameson. Your lies won’t work on me.”
I’m not fucking lying.
As much as I wanted to say that, I knew it would be pointless. He didn’t believe me, and nothing I said would change it.
After a few moments, he spoke again. “I was going to propose to you.” His eyes darted to mine again. “After graduation.”
My breath caught in my throat, and I hurriedly glanced away so he couldn’t see the tears forming in my eyes. If none of this ever happened, and he had proposed, I would have said yes. With no hesitation. I loved him so deeply, more than I’d ever cared about another human being.
“I’m sorry,” I mumbled.
I wish I knew what happened. I wish I could come clean with all of it, even if it didn’t change anything. Not knowing was killing me. For a while, I thought I’d drank too much. But he was right. There wasn’t enough time to get that drunk before he came home. Was something wrong with me? Did Dakota do something to me? He’d always been on the creepier side, but I didn’t want to wrongfully accuse him of anything.
My thoughts came to an abrupt halt when we pulled up to the mansion. His dad had always been stupidly rich, but now that he was a billionaire, that money had multiplied. On the outside, the house looked the same as I remembered. The grass was freshly mowed, there were a few plants surrounding the front of the massive building, and all the cars were in the garage except for one I didn’t recognize. A red Nissan was parked up front and looked relatively new.
We parked behind the vehicle and Ash turned off the car, shoving the key in his pocket.
My heart started thudding rapidly in my chest, a mixture of fear and nerves zipping through me. “Your mom isn’t going to want me here,” I pointed out.
“She’ll get over it.”
That wasn’t very reassuring, but I knew there was no getting out of this. He opened his car door and stepped out onto the pavement. With a lot of reluctance, I followed, wrapping my arms around my body. My gaze roamed around the yard, taking in the trees on either side.
I could run…
But where would I go? Plus, Ash was much faster than me. He’d catch me before I reached the tree line, and then I’d look like a wreck by the time he dragged me inside. I did have the element of surprise, though. He wouldn’t expect me to take off like that, especially when he was my only ride. Briley probably wouldn’t come and get me if I asked. Not with her being so pissed off right now.
Ashton had turned his back to me, expecting me to follow like an obedient little bitch. It was almost too good to pass up, and I only had a limited amount of time to weigh my options.
I cast one last look at the back of Ashton’s retreating form.
Fuck it.
I broke off in a sprint, the wind whipping through my hair as my feet pushed me toward the woods. My heart was hammering against my chest cavity with reckless abandon. I was good at climbing. I could climb a tree and hide until he got tired of searching for me.
“Goddamnit, Everleigh,” he cursed.
I didn’t dare look back. I just knew that I couldn’t face all those people—to see their judgment. Adrenaline was pulsing through me, driving me forward at an even faster pace. I couldn’t be in that house. Not after everything that had happened.
The trees grew nearer, but I wasn’t na?ve enough to get too hopeful about it. Not when his footfalls were thudding against the ground behind me. I willed my legs to move even faster, running on my toes instead of my feet because it gave me more momentum.
I slipped through the trees before taking off toward one that seemed easy enough to climb. But as soon as I started in the direction of it, something grabbed at the back of my shirt, jerking me backwards.
A surprised yelp fell from my lips as I was forced into a hard chest. I could feel his heart pounding, his hands moving to wrap around me before he turned me and backed me into a tree. The air left my body from the force, and I was gasping for breath.
Ashton was seething, his black bangs sweeping across his forehead. He wrapped a hand around my throat and applied a little bit of pressure, not enough to cut off my airway, but enough to warn me not to move.
“You never know when to fucking stop, do you?” he growled. He moved his free hand to the front of my jeans and started fumbling with the button, sending my body on high alert.
“Ashton,” I whimpered, trying to wriggle away from him. Confusion was tearing through me, my body still high off the rush of adrenaline I’d felt moments before.
He managed to get my button undone and then moved onto the zipper. “This is what you want, right?” he mocked, sliding his hand beneath the waistband of my panties. His fingers brushed over my vulva, sending sparks of electricity careening through me. I shook my head, but he just laughed, brushing his fingers against my slit. “Of course it is. Fucking slut. You’re already wet for me.”
My head spun with even more confusion. How could I possibly be wet right now? He pushed two fingers inside, making my back arch. A gasp fluttered past my lips as he pumped them in and out of me a few times.
“Stop,” I pleaded. “Your parents.”
“Good thing I picked you up early then, huh?” He smirked, hooking his fingers inside me. A moan tumbled out before I could stop it, shame washing over me immediately.
I shook my head, tears stinging my eyes. I bucked against him, unintentionally making his fingers slide in even deeper. My hands moved to his chest, and I attempted to push him away, but he was completely solid. I couldn’t understand why he was doing this. Couldn’t understand what was happening. My head swam with confusion, but my body was reacting to his touch. I could feel heat blossoming in my core, twisting until it turned into fluid that was coating the area his fingers were now occupying.
“Please,” I whimpered.
Having him touch me like this was too much. It was clear that there were still so many unresolved feelings and problems that we’d most likely never be able to work through. Despite the humid weather, a cold chill crawled down my spine, causing me to shiver as he continued pumping his fingers in and out of me. My walls clamped around him as he forced his way through the small passage.
He grunted, his arms flexing with every movement of his hand. “You’re still so tight. Figured your pussy would be worn out and sloppy by now from how many cocks have been in it.”
Pain slashed through my chest at his crude words. I hadn’t been with that many people, had I? Just Ashton, Jameson, Lucas, and…apparently Dakota, even if I couldn’t remember much of it. Was that a lot?
“Stop,” I demanded, but my voice cracked on a sob. Tears were pooling over my water line, trickling down my cheeks. I shouldn’t have run. I should have just sucked it up like I’d done with everything else and followed him into the house.
“Why would I do that?” he asked condescendingly. “You’ve been giving it up to everyone else.” He grunted, increasing the pressure and speeding up his movements. A choked moan slipped from my lips, making me cry even harder. “My brother, my best friend, that Ned Flanders piece of shit you call a boyfriend.”
Finally, he withdrew his hand. Relief flooded my system at the loss of contact, but my body had a very different reaction. My pussy throbbed, aching for the friction only he could give me. As if it remembered exactly what he could do to it. But I shot those thoughts down instantly. My relief was short lived when he started jerking my pants down my legs, fear coiling tight within my stomach.
“Ashton, no.” I shoved against him again, but he pushed me back against the tree with more force, causing the bark to dig into my spine. I winced from the uncomfortable feeling, my breathing coming out short and panicked.
When he managed to get my pants the rest of the way off, he ripped my panties from my waist. They were new ones, and it wasn’t like I could just go to the store anytime I wanted, especially with money being tight. I yelped from the slight sting of them jerking against my hips. He tossed them on the ground and started fumbling with his own jeans, shoving them down his legs along with his boxers. He took his massive erection in his hand and started pumping it a few times.
“Why are you doing this?” I whispered, hating that he had no regard for me whatsoever. That to him, I was just a warm hole to stick his dick inside. There was no sign of the boy I’d fallen in love with. He was this empty vessel, willing to do whatever it took to destroy me completely.
His eyes found mine. Instead of the gray shade they normally were, they’d somehow grown darker. “Why not?”
Ashton didn’t give me time to respond, he was hoisting me up against the tree and slamming into me with one thrust. A scream erupted from my throat due to the sharp pain rippling through me at not having him worked in properly. He groaned, his fingertips digging into my ribs as he held me in place. Tears blurred my vision, but it wasn’t from the physical pain. It was from the emotional agony burrowing into my chest. My hands grasped onto his shoulders for support, my entire body vibrating with sobs, pain, and pleasure.
His lips brushed against the corner of my mouth as he seated himself, taking everything he wanted from me, like it was owed to him.
He pulled back a bit before drilling into me just as forcefully. My head hit the tree, sending a jolt of pain through my skull.
“I’m not on birth control.” I whimpered, trying to breathe through the intense pleasure that was starting to build.
He scoffed. “You think I give a fuck?”
Horror snaked through me at the mere prospect of getting pregnant. Ashton was the only one I hadn’t used a condom with, and that was because I’d been on the pill. He moved one hand, wrapping it around my neck, while gripping my hip with the other. His hips snapped forward over and over again, driving him deep and fast. His grip on me was bruising, and I had no doubt that he’d be leaving marks behind. Just like he always did.
“Fucking shit,” he moaned. The sound of our skin slapping filled the air, and I was thankful that we were in the woods where no one could hear us.
The pain ebbed away completely, leaving me with nothing but pleasure. I shouldn’t be enjoying this. He ignored my pleas for him to stop, and yet my body couldn’t get enough. My heart couldn’t get enough. My arms wound around his neck, a series of noises I couldn’t even decipher escaping me. I could barely even register the harsh bark of the tree against my back now, because all I cared about was this.
He was fucking his anger into me, letting me feel all his rage as he rammed against my body repetitively, hitting a spot that only one other person has been able to reach—Jameson. My legs were propped over his hips, but it was difficult to keep them there without the extra support. As if sensing this, Ashton dropped his hand beneath my thigh and gripped it to help drive his movements.
“You’re such a goddamn whore, Everleigh.” He grunted, adding pressure against my throat, almost like he was warning me—telling me that he could choke me out right here if that’s what he wanted.
My pussy involuntarily clamped down on him, getting off on the possible threat looming above me. I’d never considered myself a masochist, but my body wasn’t getting the memo. He groaned from the feeling, sweat beginning to form around his hairline.
Pleasure was starting to pool in my abdomen, sparks jolting through me at a pending release. A strangled moan fluttered past my lips, my breath catching in my throat as he bulldozed into me again. It was so ruthless and raw and real. There was nothing intimate about this aside from the history we shared.
“Is this how my brother fucked you?” he growled, slamming into me ever harder.
I cried out, my hands twisting through his hair. “No asshole,” I choked out through pants, not wanting to think about him at all right now. He nipped at my neck, causing me to gasp. My hips started jerking against him, riding him despite his hips meeting me head on.
I hated that I enjoyed this. Hated that I fucking missed this. He’s done nothing but treated me like shit since waltzing back into my life, and even as we fucked, he had dickish things to say.
“You’re gripping me so damn tight,” he panted. “Fuck. I hate you.”
If I wasn’t being pounded into oblivion, I might have laughed at the irony. “If you hate me so much, why is your dick inside me?”
His eyes were hooded, the anger draining from his features. But my comment seemed to set him off, because he tightened his grip on my throat and started moving even more intensely, which I didn’t even think was possible. His lips smashed against mine, our teeth clashing together. I cried out, the sound bleeding into his mouth.
Electricity jolted through my core, spreading within my abdomen until I was shattering against him. A scream tore from my throat as my body shook wildly from the intense orgasm.
“Fucking shit!” he growled, breaking the kiss. He slammed into me again and again until he was spilling inside me, his seed dripping down my ass and onto the ground.
We were both gasping for breath, sweat marring both of our bodies as we worked to suck oxygen back into our lungs. He pumped into me a couple more times before pulling out and easing me back onto the ground. My legs were limp, and I was forced to lean against the tree for support.
He moved away from me and grabbed his jeans and boxers, tugging them on followed by his shoes. I’d been in such a daze that I didn’t even remember him taking mine off me. With slow movements, I grabbed my jeans, pissed that I no longer had panties to wear. I slid them over my hips and slipped my feet into my converses.
“Not bad,” he said, running a hand through his disheveled hair. “But not as good as your sister’s.”