Chapter 14
INTO THE ABYSS
REN
The fact she’s likely intentionally baiting me is not lost on me, but this time I’m only too happy to oblige in whatever she has in mind.
“Always running that mouth,” I drawl.
Her smile turns teasing. “And what are you going to do about it?”
“Well,” I reply with a slight huff. “I’m gonna do my job.”
“You’re gonna do your job?” she parrots with another laugh.
“That’s what I said,” I respond, my voice serious, one hand moving to her ass, pushing her into position beneath me. I tease her with the tip of my dick, then shift so my shaft rubs against her clit, earning a soft moan from her.
Eyes half-closed, her hands now gripping my sides, her body relaxed and pliant as she gasps, “And what job is that?”
I stop moving, wait for her to meet my gaze. “I’m gonna fuck a baby into you.”
The corners of her mouth curve up, her torso bowing slightly, her legs widening further. “Before the wedding? How scandalous.”
I resume rubbing my dick on her slick pussy, enjoying the feel of her hands gripping my arms, her legs pressing into the outside of my thighs where I’m knelt over her. Her smell and her hot little sex noises that drive me wild.
I’ve never been a missionary kind of guy before, but I’m starting to understand the appeal. And knowing I may well be impregnating her ignites something feral in the most primal parts of my psyche.
Suddenly compelled to talk it through, I use my hands on either side of her head to push my torso upward so I can see her face. “Is it even possible?”
Her brow furrows slightly, and she shakes her in confusion. “What?”
“Can I actually put a baby in you right now?”
“Wha—what do you mean?”
I don’t want to ruin the mood with this kind of talk, but since I genuinely want to know, I clarify, “Have you been off birth control long enough for this to stick?”
Her expression slowly morphs from confusion to understanding, but then her cheeks pinken, her earlier pliancy vanishing. My frown deepens as she says nothing, and as the silence goes on, worry brews inside me. “What’s wrong?”
She sighs deeply, her lips twisting slightly before finally she confesses, “I was never on birth control.”
My frown turns into a scowl as her words sink in. She looks up at me, waiting as I deal with the onslaught of emotions swirling inside me. I huff, shake my head, but I don’t pull away as I murmur, “What would you have done if I’d accomplished the job that first time?”
She shrugs slightly, her expression sheepish yet entirely unrepentant. “I don’t know. Dropped the deal, I guess?” Her words come out as a question, and I purse my lips, shake my head, completely at a loss for words at the depth of her treachery.
What makes it worse is I’m not even mad.
And I should be furious.
Maybe it’s just because this way I have the future in hockey that I wanted for myself. Or maybe it’s because I understand the length people will go to when they’re desperate.
“You’re so fucking naughty,” I respond, breathless as I push the head of my cock into her cunt. “I should punish you for pulling one over on me.” I push in deep, slowly; so slowly I feel her inner muscles clenching and releasing as she urges me deeper.
Part of me wants to pull out. To move away. To leave her cold and wanting. But a larger part of me wants to know the why behind it all. And the only way to get to the bottom of that is to stay.
So, I slide my cock into her pussy until my pelvis presses against her pubic bone. Then I push in some more, grinding against her clit, reveling in the loud moan falling from her lips.
Lowering my upper body, I move my hands to cup her skull in my palms. Then I press my face into her neck, rock into her, my chest rubbing against her breasts, my pelvis grinding against hers.
Her hands slide along my back to my ass, squeezing as she gasps, “Don’t stop. Please don’t stop.”
Shifting my hips back, I slide back in, sharply. “You like that?” She nods, her sharp intake of breath causing me to jerk my hips again, my teeth nipping at her neck. “You love it when I fuck you?”
“Oh fuck,” she moans, her face turning into my cheek, her lips brushing along my skin, seeking. “Please Ren. Please.”
“Please what?” I ask against her lips, and she replies, “Kiss me.”
So, I do. I sink in, skipping over the teasing licks and nibbles, my tongue sliding between her lips hungrily, mimicking the rhythmic rut of my cock in her pussy.
She kisses me back with equal fervor; our lips clinging, our tongues dancing, our moans and groans of pleasure mingling between our hot breath.
Her fingertips dig into my ass cheeks as she pulls me toward her, her heels pressing into the back of my thighs as she locks me into place, using this new leverage to rock her hips into my thrusts.
Ripping my lips from hers, I press my forehead against hers. “You want it, princess? You want my baby inside you?”
She goes to reply but chokes on her words, a sobbing moan falling between us. I pump into her faster, keeping the pulsing pressure on her clit, wanting her to come all over me. “That right, princess. I’m going to give it to you. I’m gonna fill you up over and over until it sticks.”
Releasing me, her hands shoot over her head, her torso bowing. “Holy shit. Oh my God. I’m gonna come. Don’t stop. Fuck.”
“Tell me, princess. Tell me what you want.”
“I want it,” she manages to gasp, the tension in her body increasing, so I ask, “Want what?”
I’m grunting with effort, wanting to keep her on the edge while also not completely wrecking her orgasm. “Say it, and I’ll let you come.”
She curses, her arms moving so one’s looped over my shoulder, the other under, so she’s wrapped around me fully. I freeze, dick jammed inside her, suspended over her as she comes alive, riding my cock in a frenzy. “Give me your baby, Ren. It’s mine. Please. You promised.”
Pure primal energy rushes through me at her words, spurring me into motion. Rolling my hips, I meet her frenzied pace, slamming into her as she drives upward, the slap of our skin an erotic cacophony in the otherwise silent room.
I try to hold back, to keep my orgasm at bay, but then her sob turns into a moan against my ear, “Come. Fucking come inside me, please, do it,” and I lose all reason, all control.
I thrust into her sharply, once, twice, before that heat in my spine and my balls ricochet, shoving me over the edge into euphoria. I push in as deeply as I can, my cock throbs, white-hot pleasure overwhelming me as my release fills her clutching depths.
Careful to keep most of my weight off her chest, I pump into her long after my orgasm finishes, ridiculously pleased with the proof of my fulfilled declaration oozing between us.
Eventually, she stirs beneath me, her hands moving between us, and I roll to the side, allowing her some space. She gives me a small close-lipped smile then rolls away, coming to her feet before I can make a grab for her.
Sprawling onto my back, I drawl, “Where are you going?”
She glances at me over her shoulder, giving me a funny look as she points in the direction she’s headed. The bathroom.
She disappears through the doorway, flipping on the light as she goes, but she doesn’t shut the door, something that typically would have bothered me. But right now, it doesn’t.
She returns quickly, immediately resuming her position next to me, resting on her side facing me. We watch each other for a few moments, enjoying a comfortable silence until she asks, “What are you thinking about?”
I smirk. Laugh. Then respond teasingly, “Just wondering how many of my boys you just flushed.”
Her eyes widen comically then she slaps me on the chest. “Oh my God, Ren. Stop!”
I laugh again, louder this time, and eventually she joins me, though likely just because I think I’m that funny. Eventually, my laughter dies down, and we both once again become quiet, only now we’re joined by the elephant in the room.
Not being one to avoid uncomfortable conversations, I say, “You gonna tell me why?”
She stills next to me; her eyes suddenly focused on a spot over my shoulder. “Why what?”
I roll my eyes. “Come on, Cass. Don’t play stupid with me,” but she continues to avoid my gaze, so I add, “You don’t have to give me an in-depth explanation. Just give me something so I’ll understand.”
She sighs. Looks me dead in the eyes. “Red.”
I jerk back as if she physically slapped me, truly taken aback by her random use of her safe word. Her stare is challenging, almost belligerent, but beneath the surface of her bravado, I see something else. Worry. Sadness. Fear.
I swallow down my urge to call her out, to take her to task for going back on her earlier statement about open and honest communication. Holding her gaze, I count down from ten, then count down again when I’m still on the edge of responding without the grace she deserves in this precarious moment.
Finally, I nod, then turn away to adjust my pillow and then fix the blankets that we kicked to the bottom of the mattress. I spread it out over both of us, making sure she’s adequately covered while she watches me silently, warily.
I turn the lights off before lying on my back, once again adjusting the most uncomfortable pillow in all existence. She remains quiet, but then, she shifts as if she’s also moved onto her back.
Not wanting her to think I’m giving her the silent treatment, I roll toward her, extend my hand until I’m touching her. I feel around, quickly realizing my hand is on her hip because she has turned away from me.
Suddenly, the silence in the room takes on a heaviness I can’t explain, a tightness in my chest that’s foreign to me, but at the same time, achingly familiar. The initial ask for distance I could manage, but this—this—this is as dark as the deepest depths of the ocean.
Bottomless. Endless. Frigid.
So, I do the only think I can think of in the moment.
Scooting over, I crowd her, use her jerk of surprise to wrap my arms around her, and scoop her into me. “Come here.”
“Ren,” she exclaims, struggling slightly. “What are you doing?”
I tighten my arms around her, effectively stopping her half-hearted attempt to extricate herself from my hold. Then I slowly ease us down so she’s cradled in my embrace, her cheek resting in that dip between my pec and my shoulder.
Loosening my grip slightly, I hold my breath, fully expecting her to bolt again. But she doesn’t. She sighs, shakes her head, repeats, “Seriously, Ren. What are you doing?”
I go to reply but end up choking on words I can’t string together because I haven’t the first fucking idea what I’m doing. I fall silent, hoping she’ll let the question rest, but of course, she doesn’t. She pokes me, waiting, so finally I say the only thing I can think of. “Red.”
Her body becomes tense, my response obviously startling her, and I brace myself for her jerking away from me, going for the lights, insisting I provide an answer even though she would not. She sighs again, rubs her cheek against me, her hand settling on my hip where I’m turned slightly toward her.
She doesn’t melt into me like she did earlier, but she also doesn’t pull away, and after a few long moments of silence, she relaxes, falling into a deep sleep.
But I don’t do the same.
Instead, I continue to lie on my back, holding her close while I stare up into the darkness, wondering how the hell I got here.
And where the hell we go from here.