Chapter Seventeen #2
“Forgive me if I find that hard to believe right now. Your shadow is watching,” he nodded behind us, I didn’t need to turn around to know what he meant. At least Hudson was keeping his distance.
“Don’t try to brush me off, Warren. If this is what you need to do, then go do it.
But don’t be reckless and don’t shut me out.
It hurt me too, you know. Being away from you.
I did what I thought was right, what I needed but you have no idea how lonely I was.
It was painful, like my heart had been left behind.
And not just over Hudson. You’re my blood, Warren.
Being back here with you now, it just brings it all home how dead I was inside when I was away from you. ”
I took his hand and squeezed it, trying really hard not to let my emotions get the better of me.
“Go be the VP, but don’t be like dad. I can’t be left in the dark.”
He stared down at me. “Never.” My brother pulled me into him and held me tightly, he kissed the top of my head as he pulled back, then nodded in Hudson’s direction. “The asshole isn’t going to let you out of his sight. He’ll ask what this was about.”
“I won’t tell him if you don’t want me to.”
“Don’t start out by lying to him, Wave. Take it from someone who has lived half his life as a lie. Besides, it saves me doing it and pissing him off. Last thing I need right now is a fight.”
“He’d understand.”
“Not willing to waste time finding out. I need to get back, I’ve already told King I’m on my way.”
“Okay,” I stepped back. I didn’t know what else to say.
“For what it’s worth,” he looked over the top of my head, back towards the hospital where the man he loved lay. “I never hated you for leaving. Or not keeping in touch. It was what you had to do. But I’m glad you’re back.”
“Me too.”
He walked away. I clenched my hands into fists as I watched. I felt Hudson’s presence stepping up behind me. He didn’t say anything, he was watching Warren too. His hand came up to the back of my head, cupping it, his thumb stroking my neck.
“I’ll explain everything back at the hotel,” I told him.
“Okay.”
That was all he said. He may not be blood, but he had been a brother to Warren since we were five years old.
In some ways, he knew him better than I did.
He took my hand and we walked to the parking lot to Ransom’s car, both of us looking up as we heard the roar of a bike engine as it headed out onto the main road.
“Shit, he took Goldie’s bike?” his brows lifted.
“He’s the VP,” I said, turning back to Hudson, as if that explained him riding another man’s bike.
He nodded his head. “Yeah, he is. Come on. I’m hungry.” Just like that. He accepted it.
The remnants of our room service dinner was on the table, Hudson was standing by the window, looking out into the darkness. He’d listened in silence while I recounted my conversation with Warren.
“I need to go knock some sense into his head.”
“He’s already made up his mind. He just needs to focus on something else to get through it.”
“Not War,” he turned around. “Connor. I should go over there and tell him he’s being a fucking asshole.”
“Not the best of ideas, given the circumstances,” I rolled my eyes.
“Why the hell would he even do that?”
I shrugged and sat down on the end of the bed.
“Well, he’s right about one thing,” he came over to the bed. “War is needed back home. Whether King wants him away doing something else or not, he needs to step up to his role and he’s really fucking good at it.”
“He was so upset. I mean, he did his best to hide it, but I could see it written all over his face.”
Hudson sat down next to me. “I’d be upset too, if the person I cared about the most didn’t want to see me.”
I gave him a look and he just grinned back at me.
“Look, the way I see it, War is in the best place for him, and Connor is where he needs to be. There is still a lot of shit to sort out and no one at the club is gonna be able to relax until we all know it’s been dealt with, and that you’re safe.”
“Yeah,” I sighed. “I’m gonna go wash up,” I told him and got up before he could say anything else.
I didn’t want to admit to it, but I was struggling to keep my shit together.
I closed the bathroom door and stood in front of the mirror, staring at myself.
I looked tired, pale and I’d lost some weight over the last few days.
I was stuffed after our meal, though it suddenly felt like ash in my stomach.
Looking at my face now, I tried to imagine the woman who had actually been our mom. I’d been so sure I could see Warren and I in Danica’s face, but what had Delaney been like? Dad had hidden her away so thoroughly, I didn’t even know if there were any pictures of her anywhere.
I suddenly wanted to find out. I needed to see her, to have some real tangible evidence that the woman actually existed. I was in this weird in between state of not knowing how to react to what I’d learnt over the last couple of days.
Warren’s words came back to me about finding out who killed her.
I wasn’t sure what he planned on doing, but now, with some clarity in my head, I wanted to be a part of that.
I may never get to meet her but if we could do this one thing for her, find the bastard who killed her, then that had to count for something.
Dad would take care of Danica, I didn’t doubt that but the person who actually did it, they shouldn’t get away with it either.
“Wave?”
I turned to see Hudson in the doorway. He was frowning at me.
“I knocked, you didn’t answer.”
“Sorry… I just…”
He came inside and walked straight over, I turned towards him and he gently thumbed the tears from my cheeks. I hadn’t even realized I was crying.
“It’s gonna be okay,” he told me. His voice wasn’t soft or gentle, it was firm, like what he was saying was a given and nothing would change that.
“Talk to me,” he brushed my hair back over my shoulder.
“What do you want me to do? Leave you for a bit, let you have some space, or I can just be here, whatever you need.”
I leaned my ass against the counter behind me and looked around the bathroom. A shower would be nice, and damn I was tired too. I didn’t think I could sleep with everything inside my head.
“My whole life I thought our mom abandoned us,” I said.
Hudson stood at my side leaning his hip against the counter, he didn’t touch me, but he was there for me, and I appreciated the hell out of that.
“With everything else going on, it never fully hit me until just now. I’ve been so angry at my mom for my whole life and, now I find out she never had a choice? She wasn’t even the person I’d been told she was.”
“It’s okay to be pissed at him.”
“I am pissed at him,” I said, pushing away from the counter.
“Before, at Rosa’s place, I was just so shocked and confused.
Dad was so sad and genuine when he was telling us but…
he kept that from us. He made us believe a woman he hated, a woman he knew had a hand in our real mom’s murder was our mom.
Who does that?” I shouted, my cry echoing around the small, enclosed space we were in.
“He hugged me,” I looked up at Hudson. He raised his brows questioningly.
“Dad. He actually pulled me out of my chair and hugged me, like if he didn’t, he’d go crazy. ”
“That’s not a good thing?”
“No… Yes… I don’t know. Now it kinda feels like he was just trying to make himself feel better. He’d spilled his guts about what really happened, and he was upset.”
“King wouldn’t hug anyone unless he meant it, he isn’t the kind of guy to take for himself, Wave. If he hugged you, it was for you. You never saw what he was like when you were gone.”
“Maybe,” I walked to the wall and put my forehead against it. “Doesn’t change the fact that he lied to us for years.”
“From what Rosa told me, your dad has never recovered from it.”
I whirled around to face him. He talked about this with Rosa? He came towards me and took my hand, then pulled me out of the bathroom. I asked what he was doing but he just led me to the bed and sat me down. He sat beside me.
“I’m not making excuses for him, or anybody else. As much as I want to beat some sense into War and Connor, that isn’t for me to stick my nose into either, but from the way Rosa tells it, it’s a miracle your dad is still here.”
“Meaning?” I sat up, glaring at him, my back straightening.
“It killed him, losing her. Almost literally.”
I turned my head away. Now the image of my father being suicidal was in my head.
I wanted to be angry with him, I had every right to be.
I could also see it from his point of view.
It wasn’t a decision I ever would have come to, for whatever reason, that was the one he made and nothing I said or did now would change that.
“I’m not saying you can’t feel angry or hurt and I know it’s got to be confusing, for both you and War. Especially you though, after what that bitch put you through and the lies she told you.”
“I just don’t know which way is up right now.”
Hudson shifted and knelt down on the floor in front of me.
He placed both hands on my thighs and stared at me until I looked at him.
“You don’t need to,” he told me. I frowned at him as he took hold of my chin and moved nearer to me.
“I’m not going anywhere. And whether you like it or not, or if you believe it right now or not, you belong here, Waverley.
That life you were living away from us, you already said it yourself it was falling apart, it isn’t what you want. ”
I couldn’t even get mad about what he was saying, because it was true. I had felt like that. I even told him that, when we were at his house that day, the first time he kissed me again after all those years. The reality of knowing my heart was whole again had hit me like a truck.
“Plus, If you ever, ever leave me again, I’ll fucking follow you and drag your ass back home. This is where you belong. You get that?”