Chapter 21 #2
“Don’t talk to her like that.”
“This is my point,” he stops and waves a hand at me.
“Deny it all you want, Eli,” he arches a brow when he says my real name.
“There are feelings involved here. And you know it too,” he pointedly looks at Cassie.
“If you want to use me to get around dealing with those feelings, then I’m not down with that. ”
“That isn’t what I’m saying,” Cassie shakes her head like he’s an unruly child.
“It’s not a negotiation either.”
“Well then what do you want Mace? Why don’t we start with you and go from there.”
He scrubs a hand roughly over his hair. We’re both still topless. I don’t know what Cassie did with mine.
“I’ll admit, it was hot as fuck… It’s just fucking weird. I mean, he told me what to do, and I did it.”
“That sounds like a you problem.”
“Not helping, Eli,” Cassie admonishes me with a look that I shouldn’t find sexy. “Also, I don’t have time for this, so if you’re saying it’s done, that’s fine. I need to get back to work. Eli, can we go please?”
I get to my feet.
“Wait, that’s it?”
It’s odd, I never knew he was insecure. This isn’t a normal situation and I’m kind of hoping he steps aside and Cassie wants to continue this arrangement one-on-one. The silence lengthens and Cassie is on the verge of walking out when he speaks.
“No one can know,” he says, shocking the shit out of me.
“I wasn’t planning to advertise it.” Cassie rolls her eyes. “You were effective at clearing the place out.” She walks around the table eyeing my chest. “Your T-shirt, is in the bathroom. What did you tell them, by the way?”
“That I needed privacy. I don’t have to explain.”
“At least you didn’t lie,” she smirks.
“Cassie,” I walk up behind her and put a hand on the side of her neck, pressing my chest against her back. She stops moving instantly. Her pulse is pounding a mile a minute. Leaning down so my mouth is near her ear, I inhale and exhale slowly.
After doing that a few times her pulse slows, and she leans against me.
Mace watches, curiosity all over his face.
Has he ever had a serious relationship with a woman?
Not that I have much experience in that regard either, but I do tend to lean more toward the emotional side of myself. Even if I’m careful who I show it to.
“No one is going to make you do something you don’t want.
And if we’re uncomfortable, it ends here.
” I give Mace a pointed look. How do I convey she means a lot to me, and it’s a huge step for me to continue this, if it’s what Cassie wants to do?
“I’m willing. It’s up to you two to decide what you want. ”
I kiss Cassie’s neck, and she sucks in a breath but turns to watch as I grab my cut and walk out of the room. Those two need to talk more than I do, I’ve made it clear what I want.
It’s strange to see the clubhouse empty.
I go grab my T-shirt which is folded up at the side of the sink.
Once I’ve tugged it on, I catch my reflection in the mirror.
This place isn’t exactly sparkling, to be expected when it’s used by men.
There are streaks all over the mirror, which I hope is from hands rubbing off the steam after a shower.
Just to be safe, I wash my hands. Shrugging on my cut I walk out to the front of the clubhouse and look through the window. A couple of them spot me standing at the window and I recognize Chaos as he walks back to the door and comes inside.
“What the fuck? Are we allowed back in now?” he snaps.
I shrug. It’s not my clubhouse. And Cassie is fully dressed. He stands aside and I walk out and head over to my bike. Everyone has gone back inside and Cassie comes out a few minutes later.
“Any trouble?” I ask.
“No.” She takes the helmet off the bike.
“It is over?” I lift a brow as she deftly puts on the helmet without my help.
Her mouth is covered but her eyes are on mine. “No. Let’s go. I need to get back to work.”
We get on the bike and without looking back or acknowledging anyone, I pull onto the road. We make good time to the gym, and I stop beside Cassie’s Mercedes. She hands me the helmet and leans forward to use the side mirror to fix her hair.
She might have washed up at Mace’s compound but not enough that I can’t smell the scent of us, all of us, all over her.
“When do you need to see King?” I ask, taking off my helmet so it’s easier to talk to her.
She blows out a breath. “Soon. But I want to wait and see if we hear anything first. And I want to know what happened with Marshall.”
“That was bad news.”
“For him more than anything,” she shakes that thought off. “Mace said he’ll look into it.”
“You and him are okay?”
“That is probably something I should be asking you.”
“It’s not like any of us has experience with this kind of thing. I meant it, sweetheart, I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”
“I appreciate that. We should talk more, about what happened at the carnival and where we go next, before we go to King.”
“Sounds good,” I try to hide the smile, again, and fail. Cassie tries to fight it too, but she doesn’t manage either. Before I can second-guess myself, I grab her hip and pull her closer to the bike, pressing against my side. She doesn’t stop me when I kiss her.
I can’t help wondering if Mace did the same thing before she left the clubhouse. In typical Cassie fashion she allows it, our tongues touching all too briefly, then steps away showing she is the one in control. It does nothing to hide how flustered she is.
We pull out of the lot and turn in opposite directions.
Things are changing, our paths are merging and I’m not mad that a third road is opening up too.
When I get back, I head back to the garage to get on with some work. I wasn’t expecting to be gone so long and have a lot to catch up on, reluctantly leaving the Buick again to work on actual paying customers problems.
The next few days are much the same. I don’t hear anything from Cassie or Mace. Every night before I go to bed, I run through two things, my conversation with Liz, and what happened at Mace’s compound.
I haven’t spoken to King, I can only assume Cassie is keeping him updated. I’ve left the whole Marshall thing alone for now too but it’s all getting to me, I’m in a strange kind of limbo here.
I’ve stayed at my house the last couple of nights, the nightmares and intrusive thoughts are fading. I thought going back to the carnival might have brought up bad memories, but it never happened. I finish off the beer and toss the empty into my recycle box, then head upstairs to my room.
I’ve never come close to telling anyone the full truth of what happened to my family. Liz knows more than anyone, about my shitty parents and losing my sister. I never told her how it happened, only that it was an accident and my mom let it happen. No one knows she held her down.
I’m still drying off after a shower when my phone buzzes. Like most people these days, the damn thing is never too far away so I see the screen flash from the back of the toilet seat with Mace’s name.
“Yeah?” I answer.
“We need to talk. Not on the phone,” he adds before I can reply.
“Where?”
The roar of a bike draws my attention, both from outside and in my ear. I walk into my bedroom and pull back the shades to see Mace’s Fatboy rolling up onto my driveway. How the hell did he even know… What’s the point?
I hang up the phone and drag the towel from around my waist, brushing it over my wet body. He’s on the porch by the time I’ve stepped into some sweats, and head down to open the door. There is no greeting as I turn my back dragging the towel over my wet hair.
I’m nothing if not polite but it takes a lot to offer him a drink, he nods and I grab two beers then we stand in the kitchen and stare at one another. I lean back against the counter and cross my ankles.
My house is small, not in the best of areas, and I haven’t done much to make it a home, even after sixteen years. I still have in the back of my mind that nothing is permanent. Or maybe I’m not that big into décor. Or owning shit, other than my bikes and tools.
The way we are standing in silence reminds me of when Hudson and War first dragged him back to the Devil’s Chaos compound. He was locked up in King’s cabin and usually I was the one watching over him.
We didn’t talk a lot, because he was hostile, but we weren’t always silent. And knowing what he did for Waverley meant he got my respect.
Somewhere along the way I lost sight of all of that and it was all because of Cassie.
“You still playing?”
I glance over my shoulder into the sitting room.
There is a chess board on the coffee table.
A game half way through. I shrug but shake my head.
It’s been like that for weeks now and I was playing by myself, not with another player.
I don’t know what happened to the one up at the cabin that we used to play.
“Why are you here?”
He sips his beer, then rests the bottle against his thigh. “I have news about Marshall,” he pauses when I straighten up. “We need to talk about something else first.”
“Took you long enough.”
“I’ve been busy with other shit,” he looks around the room so he’s avoiding my face when he asks. “Have you seen her?”
“Not since I dropped her off, I don’t tend to see her often. Why don’t you say what you came here to say, Mace. What are you afraid of?”
“I’m not afraid of anything,” he scoffs turning back to me. “I want to know what your deal is. Why you are agreeing to what she suggested when you have more than a hard on for her.”
“Cassie isn’t like other women. She doesn’t want to be in a conventional relationship.”
“You think what we’d be doing is a relationship?”
“I think it’s what Cassie needs.”
“What does that mean?”
“As much as it pains me to say this, the two of us is what she needs.”
“Do you have any idea how vague that sounds?” he huffs out. “And obvious considering she let the two of us fuck her.”
“Don’t say it like that,” I set my beer down and straighten up.
“Are we gonna fight now?” he drawls. “Cos that’s fine, I don’t mind knocking you about a bit but I came here for a reason. Why should I do this? For the last three days all I’ve thought about is what a fucking insane idea it is and… I still want to do it.”
That knocks the wind out of my sails. He is here getting in my face but wants to understand this.
“You know what people will think,” he says.
“I don’t give a shit what people think.”
“But she will,” he pinches the bridge of his nose. “And I do too. This isn’t exactly how I thought shit would go for me.”
“Yeah well, life throws curveballs,” I finish the beer and toss it in the recycle box making the glass clatter. Mace watches me as I grab another and pop the cap off. “You never thought you’d be wearing that either,” I point my bottle at his chest. “You made your peace with that.”
“This is different. You and me,” he lets out a sarcastic laugh. “We’re not friends. And I’m getting pretty fucking tired of you telling me what to do.”
I swipe a hand through my wet hair. “Never took you for a liar, Mace.”
“You’re really asking for a throat punch right now.”
“Only us here,” I shrug. “If you really didn’t like it, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. You would have walked away.”
Without giving him a chance to respond I walk out of the kitchen because it’s fucking cold and there is a sweatshirt on the back of the couch. I drag it on and brush water droplets off my face.
Mace steps into my line of vision as I drop down onto the sofa.
“And for the record,” I smirk at him. “I never once told you what to do.”
His jaw clenches but he can’t argue with the truth. I’ll let him sit with that for a little while. He’s right about one thing, it’s not exactly a relationship but it’s a start.
“What did you want to tell me about Marshall?”
His expression changes, grows harder than I have seen it in a while. “We found someone who knows what happened. He’s at the shed.”
“In Sussex?”
“I don’t have one yet.”
“Does Ballistic know about this?”
“I didn’t pick the lock. Before I change my mind and walk the fuck out of here, you want to get dressed and come talk to him?”
Part of me hates that she’s being left out of it. There isn’t a lot I can do about it given where the guy is. She will understand. And maybe after we’ve talked to this asshole and figured shit out, we can go talk to her. The two of us.
Mace is staring at me like he has the exact same thoughts on his mind.
He’s unsure my ass.
“Give me five.”