Chapter 4 Dex
DEX
On Sunday morning, Dex woke and smiled at the ceiling. Fuck, that was a novelty. Sundays were always good because it meant brunch with Ollie, but his mood didn’t usually lift until he’d left the condo.
Apparently, having a date to look forward to that night was all it took.
While Dex had initially been disappointed when Luc hadn’t come home with him, the anticipation coiling inside him over the last few days had been a welcome change. He hadn’t been on a date in years.
He wasn’t usually as forward as he’d been with Luc. Dex almost didn’t know what had come over him, other than a burning need to offer his body to Luc. With any luck, he’d get the opportunity tonight.
He got up, crossed the hall to the bathroom, and turned on the shower, careful not to mess up anything before the open home later.
The condo was a two-bedroom, two-bathroom set-up, which he’d managed to keep in good condition in the years since his parents had passed away.
Dex still used the hall bathroom and slept in his childhood room rather than move into his parents’ old room, the one with the ensuite, which he’d left completely unchanged.
He’d have to address that soon.
Dex pushed packing his parents’ belongings to the back of his mind. No need to stress over that today.
After showering and wiping down the bathroom, Dex got dressed and headed downstairs to the bakery. The sweet smells had his mouth watering. He hadn’t bought a coffee cake in ages, and Ollie had said Dante liked sweets, so it seemed like a good bet.
When the cake was secured in his canvas bag, Dex headed out and turned toward Ollie’s apartment.
Dex had met Ollie’s boyfriend, Dante, briefly at an art show a while back, but hadn’t seen much of him since, and was looking forward to getting to know him better at brunch.
Should he tell Ollie he had a date? Butterflies swarmed in Dex’s chest. Best not to. There’d be too many questions. He should see how dinner with Luc went before saying anything, in case it turned into nothing but a hookup after all.
Honestly, Dex wouldn’t be disappointed if that’s all it was. Part of him preferred it. Dinner and getting off sounded pretty damn good. Dex didn’t do attachments, and any time he seriously considered having a boyfriend, with real feelings involved, his chest constricted.
What if he fell in love with Luc and something happened to him? Dex barely scraped through his parents’ deaths without dropping out of school and losing his job.
But he needed a change, and not a small one. The things that had kept him safe were starting to hurt, like living in his parents’ condo as if they might come home at any moment and thank him for looking after it.
Dex wasn’t comforted by familiarity anymore. It haunted him, and being alone was starting to feed his fears rather than soothe them. He had to sort himself out. Holding back and distancing himself from people wasn’t protecting him from anything.
Selling the condo was a healthy decision, even if the process was hard. Dex wanted to embrace his life and make it into something, not merely get through it.
A date with a hot, disarmingly upfront guy like Luc was unequivocally a step in the right direction, and after this first step, who knew? Dex might finally confront the other things he’d been holding back from.
There’d always been something missing with the guys he’d dated and had sex with, and the missing piece wasn’t exactly a mystery. Orgasms were great, sure, but Dex could never ask for what he truly wanted.
He longed for his sex partners to get rough with him, tie him up, whisper twisted things in his ear, and that was only the start.
But he was never able to broach the topic with anyone—fear of judgment always silenced him—and he was too intimidated to seek out kinky spaces.
Everyone would be experienced, and all he had were fantasies, which led to a whole other realm of anxiety.
It was easier to ignore his desires, but Dex was tired of nothing in life feeling as good as it should.
He reached Ollie’s building and buzzed to be let in, then slogged up the endless flights of stairs to the top floor.
Ollie answered the door so fast, he must have been hovering on the other side, waiting. “Hey.” He beamed, smile blinding and hair disheveled.
Dex stepped inside. “What’s up with you?”
“Huh?” A guilty look flashed across Ollie’s face. “Nothing. I’m good. What did you bring?”
“Coffee cake.” Dex followed Ollie down the hall and into the kitchen, where he unearthed the cake from his bag. “You haven’t made coffee yet?”
“Shit, sorry.” Ollie quickly grabbed a bag of coffee grinds and was about to dump them into the machine without a filter. He caught himself in time, laughed, and quickly found the filters.
Dex switched the oven to preheat. Something was up. Ollie wasn’t usually scattered. “Where’s Dante?”
“In my room. He should be out in a second.”
As if on cue, Dante appeared. “Hi, Dex. It’s nice to see you again.” He stuck out his hand.
Dex shook it. “You too. Hope you like coffee cake.”
Dante’s face lit up. “Cake? I love cake.”
“Ollie mentioned you prefer sweet breakfasts.”
Dante gave Ollie a tender look. “I love sweets for every meal, but it’s easier to get away with having cake for breakfast than dinner.”
Ollie laughed and poked Dante in the side, his demeanor more relaxed. Maybe Ollie was worried about all three of them hanging out. This relationship was a big deal for him.
Harper, Ollie’s roommate, sauntered into the kitchen as they poured their coffee—none for Dante, who made himself a hot chocolate complete with marshmallows and whipped cream. Once the coffee cake was plated, they trooped into the living room.
“What are we playing today?” Dex asked as he sank into the couch. Ollie and Dante were on the opposite end, with Harper in the armchair. “I hear you’re a gamer, Dante.”
“Sure am. I’ll play anything and everything.” Dante took a sip of hot chocolate and licked the cream from his lips.
Ollie fidgeted beside him. “Why don’t we chat and eat first, then game later?”
“Okay.” Dex frowned at Ollie’s renewed nervousness.
“How’s selling the condo going?” he asked.
Dex’s gut twisted. “The first open home is today, thank god, but I can’t stop feeling shitty about it.”
“There’s nothing to feel shitty about,” Ollie said.
“I know. I’m not having second thoughts. I need to do this to move on, and I’m ready. But being ready doesn’t mean it’s easy. You know?”
Ollie squeezed his shoulder. “I know.” His gaze wandered to Harper and lingered.
That was odd. Maybe Ollie had told Harper about his parents’ deaths? Dex didn’t mind. He got sick of explaining it to people. Maybe Dante knew, too.
Ollie’s attention returned to Dex. “I’ve got something to tell you.”
The air in the room seemed to shift, settling heavily over them. Dante placed a hand on Ollie’s thigh as if in support.
What the fuck. Did Ollie have bad news?
Dex’s heart raced, and his palms broke out in a sweat. Was Ollie sick? What if he had cancer? What if it was terminal? For a second, Dex couldn’t breathe.
“What is it?” he choked out.
Ollie took the mug from Dex’s hand and squeezed his fingers. “I’m okay. I didn’t mean to scare you. Fuck, it’s not bad.”
Dex sucked in a lungful of air, not bothering to pretend his mind hadn’t gone exactly where Ollie suspected. He nodded and got himself under control.
“It’s something Dante, Harper, and I all want to share with you, actually,” Ollie went on.
Huh?
Dex looked around at each of them. The tone was serious, but it wasn’t like Ollie was about to make some big announcement about the three of them. Maybe about him and Dante, but Harper had his own boyfriend, so including him seemed random.
Ollie turned to Dante. “I don’t know how to start without sounding like I’m pulling a prank.”
“Want me to try?” Dante asked.
Dex couldn’t take the suspense. “Please, someone tell me. I don’t care how it sounds.”
Dante turned to him with a soft expression, wrinkles forming around his eyes and reminding Dex that he was older than the rest of them. “Ollie learned a secret several weeks ago, and he’d like to share it with you.”
“A secret?”
“Yes, one that Harper and I are already aware of. That’s why we’re all here.”
Dex looked to Ollie for guidance.
Ollie smiled, but his dimples didn’t appear. “Keep an open mind.”
“Sure. Of course. I won’t judge you guys.” Maybe they were all into some obscure secret sex thing? Dex definitely wouldn’t judge them for that.
“Magic is real,” Ollie blurted out. “Harper and Dante can both do magic.”
Dex wasn’t sure his mind could open that far. He laughed. “I see why you were worried. Come on. Don’t mess with me.”
“We’re not,” Ollie said earnestly. “I want you to know the truth, so I don’t have to hide anything from you. This way, you can get to know Dante and Harper for real. Magic is part of who they are.”
Dex shook his head. “Magic isn’t real. It can’t be.”
If it were, why did his parents die in a stupid boating accident? Why couldn’t magic have saved them? Unless… Maybe it wasn’t too late to change the past if magic were real.
Ollie squeezed his hand again. “It is real, and we can show you so you don’t have to take our word for it. But magic isn’t perfect. It can’t do everything.” Ollie hesitated, tone serious. “Some things are still impossible and can’t be stopped or undone.”
Was he saying…? No. Dex didn’t believe this. He couldn’t. Except Ollie’s expression was so tender that Dex’s heart cracked. Ollie would never joke about his parents’ deaths, and that had to be what he was referring to.
Tears welled in Dex’s eyes, and his throat clogged. “What can magic do if it can’t bring people back?”
Fuck, had he said that out loud? Was he entertaining the possibility that Ollie wasn’t full of shit?
“It can protect you and help heal you.” Of course, Ollie started with the things that would soothe Dex’s worries. “Magic potions can help you sleep. Illusions can make you invisible.”
Yeah, right.