Chapter Two-Maria
CHAPTER TWO-MARIA
I make a mental note to buy more color depositing conditioner. Sometimes it’s shampoo. But I think the conditioner works better.
“Shit.”
I hiss and check the phone. I’m late and I don’t have time to order it now. I sigh, aggravated for no good reason.
I know coming back to my home state means having to stay incognito. But it makes me angry. It’s just one more thing I miss about my old life.
My natural hair color, I mean. It’s dark brown, like chestnuts, and I have gold and reddish highlights. It’s also wavy and long, hanging down to the middle of my back when loose.
But ever since I came back to New Jersey to be closer to my mother, I’ve been straightening it and using the most natural hair coloring treatment I can find.
I don’t want to dye it. Nothing so permanent as that.
I walk out of the shitty little basement apartment I’m renting, and I groan.
“Why is it so fucking hot?” I mutter and start fanning myself.
I work at the Vipers’ Den. It’s already six, and usually I am at the bar by now.
But I’m running late.
I went to five o’clock mass to see my mother at St. Aloysius’ Church. It’s the only time I get to see her.
We don’t acknowledge each other in public. But today I sat two rows behind her, and I swear I smelled her perfume.
There were tears in her eyes as she walked past me when it was over. And I understand, I do. I cried, too.
I want to be able to hug her. To talk with her in public. To visit my childhood home.
It’s just too dangerous.
Matteo still comes by every couple of months, pretending to be checking in on her and commiserating with her over how faithless I am.
The man is crazy. Completely fucking delusional.
We were never dating, and the whole jilted lover act is absurd.
But he’s dangerous. More so than ever now because his father is dead and there is no one holding the leash.
He scares me.
But my mother is all I have. When she was diagnosed, I knew it was time, so I came back.
I try to see her at church every other week.
Mami is so thin and frail. My chest squeezes and I sniff.
Cancer is a motherfucker, but the doctors are hopeful.
I want to be able to visit her at home, accompany her to her chemotherapy and doctor appointments.
But I can’t and it is killing me.
Part of the reason I sought the Vipers was to maybe catch the attention of their king and get his help with this delicate situation.
A desperate, stupid plan.
I’m embarrassed about it now.
But Nico has been kind to me. And he’s chosen to let it go.
Thank goodness.
Even better, I kind of like his wife.
Maybe we can be friends.
I don’t know if it’s possible. But I want to try. I don’t have many of those.
Loneliness is a bitter pill to swallow, and I feel so alone.
Maybe that’s why I chose bartending as my profession. It gives me a chance to talk to people with the safety of having the bar between me and them.
It sounds weird but think about it.
Waitresses get harassed and groped. It sucks, but it happens.
But bartenders?
Nah.
We’re courted and respected by our customers. It makes sense, right? If you harass me, you don’t get your drink. Period.
Who wants that when they’re at a bar looking to kick back with their friends, have a couple of drinks, and a good time in general?
It’s the perfect job. Of course, there are certain people who get rough.
But that’s what bouncers are for. And the Vipers’ Den has the best.
You don’t fuck with the people who work here.
It’s one of the attractions.
I know all about the Vipers.
Heard whispers of them before I left six years ago. Sure, Papi and Mami kept me sheltered.
But I’m not stupid.
If anyone can take Matteo Sanchez on, it’s the men running this organization.
But since I failed to catch Nico’s eye, I don’t see why they would.
So, I just have to suck it up and hope being an employee is good enough.
“Hey, you got any change?” an older man in tattered clothes asks from the stop he’s sprawled out on.
I can smell the booze reeking off him from where I’m standing, but who am I to judge?
“Hey Harold, how are you?” I say and reach into my pocket for a couple of singles.
“Good, Miss Maria, thank you kindly,” he replies and stuffs the bills in his pocket.
“Be safe, Harold.”
“You know I will. You too, pretty lady.”
“I’ll bring you some takeout later,” I tell him as I wave goodbye and jog to catch the bus.
By the time I arrive at the Den, my palms are sweaty, and I feel anxious. I don’t know what it is.
I mean, nothing happened at church.
No one recognized me or seemed to notice me at all. I made eye contact with Mami once when I received communion, but that was it.
I tug on the bottom of the silk tank top I’m wearing and smooth my palms over my tight black pants. On my feet, I have my most comfortable pair of leather boots.
Yes, I’m wearing boots in the summertime, but they’re practical for my job.
This is my usual attire for tending bar. There are no uniforms at the Vipers’ Den and I’m glad.
Half a dozen silver bangles clink together as I walk to the front door and the sound soothes me. Almost like bells.
I’m wearing two pairs of silver dangling earrings that match, and every time they touch my shoulders, I get shivers down my spine.
Biting my lip, I head directly for the bar.
“You’re late,” Antonio, another bartender tells me unnecessarily.
“Sorry. I’ll close tonight if you like,” I reply.
It’s my way of apologizing. Antonio nods. He’s married with two kids, and I know he likes to get home as early as possible.
He’s been working here longer than me, but I have been given just as much responsibility as he has, if not more.
“You’re a gem, Maria,” he says, and I smile, but it’s forced.
Maria is my middle name, and I feel like a liar using it without telling people that.
Like some underhanded, devious snake.
But it’s the best I can do, so I just swallow the guilt and my unease along with it.
By seven, the crowd is shuffling in nicely, and I am hoping to bring in a lot of tips. Mami’s newest medical bill just arrived, and it is a doozy.
I see Anna Fury and her friend, Giselle, sit down at the king’s table and I head over there. Time for me to make amends.
I sort of had it in my idiot head to catch Nico’s eye and maybe get him to have Matteo back off.
It’s been six years since I left home.
Six years since his brother and my father got killed.
I can still remember how scared I was after Papi’s funeral when Matteo got handsy with me in the back seat of his SUV.
Sometimes I feel like maybe I made too big a deal of it. Then I remember his cold eyes and the way he looked at me like I was a piece of meat, and I know I made the right decision.
Also, he keeps tabs on Mami. Knowing that makes me feel even more secure about leaving in the first place.
But I can’t stay gone. My mother is sick and I’m not leaving her again.
Everything is just so fucked up.
But I’m glad Nico has Anna.
I don’t think I could ever be with a man like him.
He has this wildness about him. Like he can’t be tamed. Even more so now that he has Anna, and she is having his baby.
Nico is unhinged.
Scary.
Powerful.
His cousin, Angel, has the same powerful build, but he’s even bigger. And he terrifies me.
Truth is, I’ve always been more attracted to the quiet types.
My mind immediately goes to Luc Batiste.
The Vipers’ Council.
How one man can be a council I am not sure, but he is.
Maybe it’s some multiple personality thing.
Or maybe it’s because on top of being a criminal, the man is an ivy league graduate and a lawyer.
There are many sides to that one. I wouldn’t mind getting a chance to explore them.
But I shove that thought away.
Luc isn’t interested in me. Why would he be? He’s tall and lean, like a rodeo cowboy. He has gorgeous curly hair and steel-colored eyes that make my knees weak.
Usually, he’s dressed in all black. Tailored shirts and pants that fit his hard body like a second skin.
But once, I saw him without his shirt and holy fuck. The man has a sleeve of black ink up his left arm.
So sexy.
Just like him. Luc is so tall and wiry. He looks sleek and rough.
I know he’s tattooed, and I wish I could ask him to take off his shirt so I could see them in detail.
But I can’t do that. I wouldn’t dream of it.
He has piercings in both ears and his left eyebrow. Metal bars, but I have no idea if they’re steel, white gold, or what.
So fucking hot.
He catches me looking at him time and again, but he doesn’t tease or smirk.
He just stands there. Quietly. Then he walks away.
So, whatever I may think of how hot the man is, he’s clearly not interested in me.
No.
Hiding behind a man won’t save me.
I know eventually I’ll need to face Matteo, and I’ll need to tell him to back off. But that’s a worry for another day.
Right now, I’m going to attempt to make friends with Anna Fury and hope she’ll forgive me.
Fingers crossed.