Chapter 17 #2
I’m not prepared for him to bend and effortlessly throw me over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. “Lawson! Put me down!” He braces his arm around my thighs as I beat on his back and kick my feet. I’m still wearing my roller skates, for Christ’s sake. “Lawson!”
Smack!
The sound reverberates through the parking garage as a sharp sting blooms on my ass. Did he just…? “Did you just fucking spank me?”
“Yeah, and it probably made you wet, didn’t it?” He smacks my ass again before curling his thumb between my legs, pressing it directly over my clit. A sharp moan flies from my lips as my back arches.
“Lawson,” I cry his name like a plea, fisting the back of his shirt as he swipes over me again and again, pressing harder each time. Arousal leaks out of me, drenching the thin spandex material of my bodysuit and leggings .
He chuckles darkly. “Just like I thought, fucking soaked.”
When we reach his car, he walks to the passenger side and sets me down, rotating his hand to swipe along my center. As I wobble on my skates, I reach behind me for the car to steady myself, and his deep stormy eyes hold mine as he brings his fingers to his mouth and sucks them clean.
Without a second thought that someone might see us, I launch myself at him, holding onto the material of his shirt as I pull him down and smash my lips to his with a strangled moan.
Lawson’s hand finds my hip to steady us, and the other boxes me in against the car.
Our lips mold together like they were created to fit that way, but I feel his hesitation, and all too soon, the kiss ends as he backs away.
“Fuck. We can’t. Not like this,” he whispers raggedly.
“I’m sick of hearing that. We can .” I hate how needy I sound as I reach for him again. Just moments ago, I held the power, and now I’m back to being putty in his hands that he’s just playing with, always warping and bending to his will, never forming something solid—something substantial.
He clutches my wrists, holding them between us, pressing his forehead to mine. “You’re drunk. I won’t make that mistake with you again.”
Trying my best to feign indifference, I shrug. “Fine. Then I’ll go back to the party.”
“The hell you will,” he growls before his lips descend on mine again.
Lawson drags me to the front of the car, which is thankfully facing away from the entrance to Sk8 Land.
He hauls me onto the hood, knocking my body back with his sheer size as his hands and lips roam everywhere.
It tickles when he nuzzles my neck, breathing hot air just below my ear before nipping my skin.
“You’ve been such a bad girl tonight, haven’t you?”
Electricity hits my clit at his words, and a pleasing trill rumbles through my chest as he caresses my sides, thumbs flicking over my nipples before continuing down, down, down, between my legs to grab the spandex.
Effortlessly, Lawson rips both my bodysuit and leggings, baring my most sensitive part to the cool night air.
It’s possessive and feral and utterly savage. And I love every second of it.
“You gave me that password because you wanted to make your daddy mad, didn’t you?” He sinks his fingers into me. One, then two. His thumb slides against my clit, stroking me repeatedly with circular patterns that generate pulses that drift down to my toes.
My skates are heavy on my feet, weighing my legs down as he moves between them. “Oh, fuck. Lawson!”
“You’re lucky I don’t bend you over and make that ass red, rainbow.” His fingers thrust deeper before he pulls out and slams them back in. “Or maybe that’s what you’ve wanted all along, is that it?”
Each pass hits a spot inside me I haven’t felt in so long.
Heat blooms throughout my whole body, coiling tighter and tighter, making my toes curl, and my fingers twist roughly in his shirt.
The car shakes beneath us, and I know that at any moment, anyone can leave the party and see that two people are fucking around.
Hear the wetness that Lawson pulls from me with each stroke.
I sink my teeth into the muscled flesh of his neck, muffling my screams so I don’t cry out his name again.
“That’s it.” I open my eyes, pulling back to see him staring at where his fingers are inside me. “Come for me like a good fucking girl. Drench my fingers and make a mess for me, Lucy.”
“Fuuuuck, Lawson!” My keening wail is muffled as he slams a palm over my mouth.
My body convulses as I come. Wave after wave crests through me as he continues pumping, my hips chasing his hand, prolonging my orgasm. Bright white spots explode behind my lids as I squeeze my eyes shut and yell my release against his warm skin.
Through it all, he murmurs in my ear, “Such a good fucking girl. Keep giving me more, rainbow. You’re doing so good. You’re making Daddy so proud.”
Somewhere in the back of my mind, it registers that at any other time, calling a man other than my father “ Daddy” would be a huge ick for me.
But hearing it come from Lawson’s lips makes me preen beneath his lusty gaze.
I want to be his good girl. I also want to be his bad girl, pushing him to punish me in a way I crave—a way that only he can satisfy.
When my whimpering ceases, we stare at each other, breathing heavily as reality settles around us. I see it, the oh shit moment he has before he starts to panic.
“Fuck.” He slides his fingers out of me and backs away from the car. “Fuck!” he shouts as he storms to the driver’s side, causing me to jump as I attempt to cover the hole in my clothes as I stand.
“Lawson— ”
“Get in the car.”
Quietly, I do as he says, and he whips his suit jacket onto my lap. All the earlier dopamine fades as an unhealthy amount of uncomfortable adrenaline surges through my veins. “What’s your address?”
“ Lawson —”
His eyes snap to mine, causing me to shut my mouth. “Address, Lucy.”
Tears sting my eyes as I clutch his jacket and relent. The smooth fabric feels cool between my fingers while I play idly with the edge of a lapel. “Why do you keep fighting this?”
A deep sigh leaves his chest. He runs a hand over his face before bracing an elbow on the edge of the window, propping his head against his fingers. “Because everything about it is wrong.”
I blink away my tears. “Why is it wrong? We’re two consenting adults who want each other. What is the problem with that?”
“Because you shouldn’t want me!” he shouts, the loud exclamation booming through the car.
“You should be at the party right now, with guys your age, not with your boss.” I open my mouth to interrupt him, but he cuts me off.
“The only reason you feel this way toward me is because of what happened on graduation night.”
Confused, I shake my head. “I mean, not really. Things started happening before then.”
He barks out a dry laugh. “No shit. And they shouldn’t have. We should never have gone there. I should never have entertained it. And now, you think you want to be with me, but trust me, Lucy, you don’t.”
“Why?” I cry incredulously. “Why are you being so stubborn about this? I think I’m capable of knowing what I want, Lawson!”
“But you didn’t then! You were a child. And I knew better!”
“I was eighteen! That is considered an adult, isn’t it? I mean, the consenting age in Illinois is seventeen, right? It could have been worse.”
“God, Lucy, don’t try to justify it that way. What happened was wrong. No matter how you look at it.” As we stop at a light, he whispers, “It was so fucking wrong. Every single message you sent me, the need to see me and talk to me, it was all a trauma response.”
A trauma response?
“What trauma? Lawson, you didn’t traumatize me. You aren’t making any sense,” I argue, slapping the center console to try and get his attention. The light turns green, and he presses on the gas pedal.
“I did, though! And it wasn’t fucking okay! What I did to you—” He roughly runs his hand through his hair, an exasperated huff expelling through his nose. “It was assault, Lucy.”
An incredulous laugh erupts from my throat, and his storm cloud eyes snap sideways to look at me with an unapproving gleam in their depths. The skin around his knuckles turns white from how hard he’s gripping the steering wheel.
“You’re not… Are you serious? You think you assaulted me?” Utter disbelief shatters my composure. “You definitely did not assault me! If you don’t remember, you tried to stop it. I didn’t want to! If anything, I forced you .”
“I was a grown-ass man. You didn’t force me to do shit. I willingly fucked around with you, knowing you were too young, knowing you were dating my son, and I didn’t fucking care. I was selfish, and you were scarred because of it.”
“Stop telling me I’m damaged,” I snap, crossing my arms with a huff as I turn away from him. “You didn’t scar me. I messaged you because I missed you. Because we had no time to explore our very obvious connection. That’s it. End of your ridiculous excuses.”
Another deep sigh sounds from his side of the car. He pulls onto my road as the honey locusts begin to sway in the wind, the rain clinging to their branches with the sudden downpour. Lawson turns on the windshield wipers, then the heat up a few notches as his gaze takes in my shivering body.
Always trying to make sure I’m comfortable.
We remain silent as he pulls up next to the curb, the only sounds coming from the whir of the heater and the wipers' rhythmic swipes as they chase the rain away.
After what seems like hours, he finally turns to me, remorse heavy in his eyes. “I wasn’t trying to say you’re damaged, Lucy. I just think that your attraction to me stems from an unhealthy place. I don’t think you would have even given me a second thought if everything that happened hadn’t.”
“Well, it did, Lawson. It happened, and I don’t fault you for any of it.
I don’t think you assaulted me, and I’m sorry that my age bothers you, but there’s not a teen at the end of it anymore.
I’m an actual adult with adult feelings, who makes big adult decisions.
And I’m telling you that I want to explore this.
Explore us .” I plead with my eyes, my voice, my body language—everything to try and show him how serious I am about this… about us .
His remorse turns apologetic. Ice grips my heart, as cold and brutal as the storm picking up outside.
“You’ve always been so gray and moody, like a storm.
Beautiful in its ability to wash away the bad but still leaving devastation in its wake if it chooses to.
” I reach for the door handle, pulling it open as I lay his jacket on the seat behind me.
“But you know what comes after a storm?” His eyebrows dart into his hairline briefly as he waits for me to answer.
“Rainbows. We’d make a good pair if you’d just allow us to explore it. ”
His gaze drops to the console, his resolve firm as he stays silent.
I expect to be angry but find myself melancholy instead. “Goodnight, Lawson.”
“Goodnight, Lucy.” I exit the car and enter the storm, taking my time to let it wash away the desperation I always feel when I’m near him.
It’s time to let it go, Lucy. It’s time to move on.
After all, when a woman decides she’s done with a man’s shit, it’s usually when he gets his act together.
Right?