Chapter 3
Lyall
For years, I have searched for Soren.
Using a branch of Yggdrasil, our holy tree whose branches and roots connect all nine realms, I have traveled to the future to find him just as I promised. My search had yielded nothing but heartache, for I had never been able to locate him.
The moment he’d passed through the portal and into exile, I could no longer feel him through the bond. It was as if he’d simply… vanished. In the days following his exile, I’d mourned my mate as if he had died. It had only been when the weeks passed that hope finally found me.
All ulfhednar from an Alpha bloodline need a mate, chosen or fated, or else they risk going berserk. All berserkers are threats that must be put out of their misery. If Soren were dead, surely I would have lost myself to the berserker’s rage by now.
My younger brother and Alpha, Wulfric, found his mate, Kieran. Gunnar recently found his mate in Arlo, though he rejected the poor witch. Even Anders, my foul-tempered twin, found his mate in Jamie.
I’d begun to fear that I would live the rest of my days alone.
Until I stepped through the portal to the future once more, and for the first time in so long, I could feel the bond connecting us, warm as summer sun bursting through the clouds in my heart.
I thought I’d died the day I’d lost him, that the pain of losing him and my father was the lowest I could fall.
I’d been wrong.
When Soren looked at me without a trace of recognition in his eyes, I died a second time.
The days pass. I don’t leave my house. I hunger for nothing. Exhaustion weighs on every bone in my body, but I can find no rest. Draugr have more life in them than I do.
The life we built together, the dreams we had, the love we shared… it’s gone. All of it. It’s not enough to have lost him once before, to have spent years mourning him. No, the gods decreed that I must mourn him a second time. This time will be my last. The heartache will be the end of me.
A sob racks my body, and I curl in on myself, shivering despite the blankets I’ve tucked myself away in.
Noises beyond my front door make me open my eyes. Familiar grumbling and mumbling tell me it’s my brothers. Great. I pull the blankets over my head just as someone kicks the door in. If they broke anything, they had better fix it.
I yelp when the blankets are wrenched off me, forcing me to glower up at my brothers. Wulfric’s eyes are full of worry. Gunnar’s jaw is set tight with anger. Anders, the bastard, is smirking.
“Get him!” Anders shouts.
Both Gunnar and Wulfric seize me by an arm and haul me out of bed.
I kick and thrash, but not eating for days has left me feeling weak, so I settle for cursing them out as they drag me through the village and toward the hot springs.
I bellow for help from the villagers, but they only laugh at our antics.
Panic flares within me as the hot springs come into view.
Anders grabs the back of my trousers, lifting my feet off the ground. They start swinging me.
“If you do this, I will kill all of you!” I snarl.
They don’t care.
My shout echoes as they hurl me toward the water.
Bastards didn’t even bother to undress me.
I sink like a stone to the bottom of the pool, too stunned to move.
My lungs throb, and I kick and claw my way to the surface.
They laugh as I come up for air. Sweeping my hair out of my face to glare at them properly, I snap, “May your balls fester and your pricks rot!”
Anders only howls louder, bent over from mirth.
“It was for your own good!” Wulfric insists, arms folded over his chest. “You haven’t left your house in a week, brother. We had to do something. Hate us if you like, but you’d have done the same.”
Aye, that’s true, but fury still burns in my gut. “I would have at least let you undress before throwing you in the spring!”
“We did you a favor. Those clothes need to be burned,” Anders says, turning up his nose.
“You lads are horrible!” Aunt Helga huffs as she approaches, carrying a tray laden with food. “Look what you’ve done to him!”
“It was necessary,” Gunnar says. His voice is hoarse, as if he hasn’t spoken in a while. The fool’s probably been spending more time in that cabin of his up in the mountains. He’ll only go berserk faster if he’s isolated.
My aunt sets the tray down by the water. “Poor dear.” Helga kneels, reaching out to cup my cheek. “I’ll bring you some clean clothes and here, use this.” She hands me a soap stone. She gives my brothers a look that makes them avert their gazes, then walks back toward the village.
I feel like a fool bathing with my clothes on, so I strip and toss my sodden clothing onto the shore, then lather up the soap stone so I can wash myself.
Wulfric and Anders undress and wade out into the spring to join me.
Gunnar remains on the shore, leaning against a tree and glowering off into the distance.
Wulfric disappears beneath the water, then surfaces, sweeping his golden hair back from his face with a boyish grin I haven’t seen in a while. He’s been quicker to smile since he and Kieran mated. Anders motions for the soap, and I fight the urge to throw it at his head.
“Are Jamie and the lad well?” I ask.
Anders nods. “Aye. Jamie tells me there’s this special day called Christmas coming up at the end of the month. He wants us to celebrate.”
I’ve never heard of such a thing, so it must be an invention from the future.
“What’s happened?” Wulfric asks, turning to me with his arms crossed.
I can’t tell him I met Soren. He would view that as a betrayal. Anders is the only one who knows the truth about what really happened on that fateful day. As far as Wulfric and Gunnar are concerned, Soren is still the man who got our father and Gunnar’s family killed.
“Nothing.”
Anders is quiet, but there’s a knowing look in his eyes.
“What a crock of shit,” Gunnar says from the shore. “Something’s wrong. Tell us.”
Sighing, I splash water over my shoulders to rinse off the soap. “It’s nothing you can fix.”
“Try me.” Gunnar cracks his knuckles. His claws are sharp, and there’s a feral glow to his eyes. “If someone has harmed you, they won’t live to see another day.”
I appreciate his protectiveness, but I shake my head. “I… had my heart broken. I fell for someone and they didn’t return my feelings.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Wulfric says. “Did they say why?”
My reflection ripples on the surface of the pool. I don’t recognize the man looking back at me with bruises under his eyes, his cheeks gaunt. “No.”
“There will be others,” Wulfric says.
My jaw clenches until my teeth ache.
There was only one, and you took him from me. The words burn the back of my throat like bile. How I want to rage at him, tear into him with words and with claws.
But I can’t. Just as Wulfric bears responsibility, so do I. No one forced me to stay. I made my choice. I chose my brothers. I let Soren go.
Anders gives me a knowing look and says through our bond, “I’m not letting you give up. I didn’t watch you pine and mope for years only for you to give up at the slightest inconvenience.”
I take a deep breath to keep my composure, pretending to rinse soap from my shoulders although they’re clean already. “I did not pine. And this is more than an inconvenience. He doesn’t remember me. Worse than that, he was frightened of me.”
Anders scoffs, earning him an odd look from Wulfric. He disappears under the water, then surfaces some way off. I swim out to the center of the pool with him. Quietly, Anders murmurs, “Of course he was frightened. No doubt you went charging in and made a spectacle of yourself.”
“Because I thought he knew who I was,” I hiss.
“Well, he didn’t. Jamie punched me in the face when we first met.”
My mouth slips open. Jamie hit him? Sweet slip of a thing, Jamie?
“Wish I’d been there to see that.”
He smacks the back of my head, making me chuckle. “Point is, you’ve got to have some tact. They don’t like being told that you’re from the past and you’ve come to knot and mate them.”
“But Soren’s not a human.”
Anders huffs. “He’s spent years in their world and for whatever reason, he’s lost his memories. He may very well believe he is one of them. So you’ve got to play by their rules, as Jamie says.”
“What’s the point? He doesn’t remember me.”
Anders snaps, “Then you’ll just have to make him fall in love with you again, idiot!”
Could he be right? Is it possible for me to find a way to earn Soren’s love?
“I did it before…” It had taken years, and my feelings had changed so slowly I hadn’t noticed it myself. Surely I can do it again.
“Are you willing to try? Is he worth it?”
My heart skips. “Of course he is!” Within me, hope blossoms like flowers in spring.
Anders grins, eyes lighting up. “Good. Now listen. Here’s what we’re going to do.”
“Where are we going?” I ask as Anders rows us out into the sea.
“To get you registered with the Time Traveler Agency.”
My heart skips. “No. Anders, what if they tell Wulfric that I registered? That would give me away!”
Anders rolls his eyes. “Not if you have good reason to visit the future.” He thumbs his own chest. “You’ve got family in the future now. It’s hardly suspicious to want to visit your twin, aye?”
I suppose he has a point. I’ve been very careful not to be seen traveling between realms. All it takes is a human with one of their fancy devices taking a picture or video of me popping out of a portal, and my pack would be in violation of traveler law.
Founded by witches, the TTA helps travelers fit into their new present by providing them with documentation needed to thrive in the modern world. Then there is the Travelers Council, witches who make the rules of time travel and punish those who violate them.