Chapter 42 #2
Maverick opens and closes his mouth, then scowls as he shakes his head.
He tugs on my hands and leads me further into the atrium.
Large green leaves reach out and caress my face and arms as we move.
They’re damp with a light dewy mist, but it doesn’t bother me.
Any other time, I would’ve reached out to stroke them back.
But now, Maverick has my full attention.
I watch him stalk ahead of me, leading me into an open space where a beautiful copper fountain is running.
Maverick comes to an abrupt stop and whirls around to face me. The sudden movement takes me by surprise, and I flinch. He catches the movement, as subtle as it is, and something flickers in those stunning gray eyes. Regret? Shame? I can’t tell.
Slowly, while he holds my gaze, Maverick lowers himself to his knees. I tense, not sure where this is going. His grip on my hands tightens.
“You don’t trust me,” he states grimly.
I open my mouth to deny it, but he shakes his head and squeezes my hands in warning.
“I can see it, Everly,” he admits. “While I hate it, I get it. I wouldn’t trust me either after what I’ve put you through.
I wish I could apologize, but there aren’t any words I could string together that would make you understand how fucking devastating it feels knowing I’ve hurt you.
From electrocuting you, to locking you up in that iron maiden, to allowing Braum and Rowan to take you back to their fucking room after telling you to get lost in the woods.
Everly, there are no words for how sorry I am.
But you’re still here when you could be in the wind. That means something, right?”
I swallow hard. “Maverick?—”
“No, listen to me, please,” he rasps. “ Please .”
At my nod, he takes a shuddering breath. Before he speaks again, he turns my left hand over and bends down to kiss the inside of my wrist, right on top of the bruise left by Rowan’s rope. Suddenly it’s my turn to inhale an uneven breath.
“Everly, I need you to understand something about me.” Maverick grimaces.
“I’m not okay. The things I’ve gone through here have changed me for the worse.
I’ve been forgotten, starved, beaten, and that was just the first year at Serenity Falls.
Then, I was pulled apart and put back together by mad scientists in Rookwell Tower—I’m a creature of their making. ”
I open my mouth to speak, to deny it, but Maverick presses on.
“Despite all that, I thought, deep down, that there were still pieces left of who I used to be. I’ve been running around here pretending to be the Maverick you knew but…
” He swallows hard. “All it took was seeing you in the gym to send me spiraling, becoming the monster the doctors made me. It shook me to my core when I finally broke free of the hate-induced cloud in my head. When we spoke last, I was afraid for both of us. I’d already hurt you once—who’s to say I wouldn’t again?
I’ve been in denial for so long about what I’ve become, I wasn’t sure what else I'd convinced myself of.”
He pauses to turn my right hand over to kiss the bruise there.
“It took seeing the items in that backpack for reality to finally come crashing in on me. Everly, you came to save me because you love me. You’ve told me and I’ve witnessed the lengths you’ve gone through to prove it, but it clicked in that moment just how…
how fucking far the love goes. And it broke me because I realized the person you came for, the person you love, doesn’t exist. The Maverick you knew is dead, Evie. ”
I flinch, all too aware of what it’s like to believe that man in front of me no longer walks this earth.
“Don’t say that!” I insist, my voice cracking with emotion.
“I’m sorry, but it’s true.” Regret turns Maverick’s voice rough. “And I think you know that.”
My heart seizes as I realize what this is.
It’s goodbye. Mavie’s cutting me off, sending me on my way for good.
Maybe he plans on escaping Serenity Falls, but he’s about to break it to me that our futures are separate.
He’s going to part ways with me. This is his version of being kind and breaking the news to me gently.
I try to pull my hands away as tears well up and I begin to panic.
“Wait, Maverick, just listen?—”
“Shh,” he whispers, refusing to let go of me.
“He might be dead, but so is the version of me you’ve had to face since arriving.
I’m not the creature Serenity Falls has tried to turn me into.
Not anymore. Seeing our future all tucked away in that backpack was what gutted the beast. Now I’m…
well, I don’t really know who I am anymore.
I know that sounds pathetic but…” His face twists with agony.
“But I’m hoping you’ll give me the chance to show you this new version of me is one that will never harm or forsake you again.
” Those agonized eyes land on my neck. “Nor will I let anyone else do the same.”
My rising panic stalls as his words process. Show me?
“Everly Woodrow, what I’m trying to say is I fucking love you and always have.
From the moment I caught you hiding in my parents’ rose bushes the first time Peter came over to visit, I was a goner.
I loved you even when just thinking about you was more agonizing than any of the punishments inflicted on me here.
Even when I thought I hated you, I loved you.
I’m so fucking sorry for everything. From here on out, I’m going to do everything in my power to keep you safe and to make you happy.
If that means working with Braum to keep you out of your father’s hands or this creepy-ass cult thing Braum’s in, I’ll do it.
” Maverick declares fiercely, his eyes shining bright with fervor as he holds my gaze.
“What I’m trying to say is I need you not to give up on me, Evie. I can be better, I swear.”
His words hang between us, suspended in time.
For a second, none of this feels real. Not the ground beneath my feet, not the air I breathe, not even the hands holding me.
I’ve wanted Maverick’s love for so long that this feels like a fantasy.
Time begins moving again at the sound of the sob that spills past my lips.
Fat tears slide down my cheeks as I try to figure out how to breathe again.
A hard, ugly gasp slips past my lips as my chest threatens to cave. “You love me?”
Tears shimmer in Maverick’s eyes but they don’t spill over like mine do.
“God, yes!” he growls. “There is no going back to fix things, but I need you to understand, moving forward—my heart only beats because yours does. I won’t ask for your forgiveness for what I’ve put you through—I don’t deserve it.
But what I will ask is that you’ll consider giving me another chance.
I’ll show you from today on how much you mean to me. ”
I know I’m an ugly crier, I’ve been told by Father plenty of times.
Still, there’s no stopping the hard sobs that rack my body or the tears running down my face, or the way my body shakes from being overwhelmed.
This . This is what I’ve wanted for so long.
I was sure Maverick wouldn’t ever return the feelings I had for him. Yet here he is, giving me his heart.
Maverick’s waiting for an answer. I can see the tension gathering on his face, the worry darkening his piercing gray eyes. Will I try to love this unknown version of the man before me? Or is my love solely for the boy I grew up alongside?
“I-I-I-,” I blubber through each attempt. Dropping to my knees to join him on the cold hard tiles, I finally manage to confess, “I could never stop loving you, Mavie.”
My words break whatever restraint the two of us have.
We lunge at each other at the same time, our lips crashing together in a wild, desperate show of passion.
The moment our lips meet, my world seems brighter and colors more vivid.
My shriveled, tired heart begins to swell and beat with renewed determination.
My hands go for Maverick’s shirt, grabbing two fists of it, as if that could prevent him from ever pulling away.
His hands cup my face as his mouth feasts on mine.
He sucks my bottom lip, then nips at it until I open my mouth.
When I do, his tongue plunges into my mouth.
A hard shudder rushes through me as I follow his lead and kiss Mavie back with the same vigor.
The nerves beneath my skin tingle, hyperaware of the man who towers over me even as we both kneel.
The powerful desire to crawl beneath his skin and reside there is one I can’t shake. But there is a way to get closer.
I break our kiss only so that I can reach down and peel off my shirt. I’ve barely touched the hem of it when I freeze. Jerking back, I shiver as humiliation cools the heat in my veins.
“Everly—” Maverick starts but I turn my head away, allowing my hair to fall into my face to hide my expression. “Everly? What’s wrong?”
“I-I can’t do this.” I scramble to my feet as reality crashes over me. Maverick loves me. I love him. We can finally be together. Except… I cover my face with my hands. “Mavie, I’m sorry. I can’t do this to you.”
He’s there, on his feet in front of me, in a heartbeat. “Hey, Evie, tell me what’s wrong.”
I ignore his demand and try to divert the conversation. Dropping my hands to my sides, I look anywhere but at him.
“You said you have the backpack, right?” I take a step in the direction we’d come from. “We… we should go. Right now. Let’s run, Mavie.”
I try to take another step, but Maverick grabs my arm and tugs me back to him. His fingers slide under my chin, and he gently tilts my head up so I’m forced to look into his eyes.