12. Deacon
DEACON
I spend a good chunk of Saturday morning in the gym with Cody, who claims he ate so much on their honeymoon, he gained six pounds. He insists he needs someone to spot him on the weight benches, and while I despise the inside of a gym, I agree because he’s one of my bros.
“So, you and Aspyn seem close lately,” Cody tells me as we move over to the stair steppers for a burst of cardio.
“We’ve always been. It’s not new at all.” Though perhaps seeing her naked in the shower and salivating over her is a little unusual.
“All right. Just saying, it’s good that you’re there for her.
I think she needs you. Damn, man. What did we ever see in Sean to begin with?
He’s Tara’s sister and now my brother-in-law, so that’s pretty binding.
But back when, I hung out with him when it was optional.
..and I mean, why? What did we ever see in him? He’s a womanizing piece of trash.”
I harumph in agreement as I start the stair stepper.
“He wasn’t always like this. He was a lonely, insecure high schooler when we met, desperate to be cool enough to have friends.
I got him into ball, climbing, and hiking, but he was always a little prissy.
Then, by college, he turned on a false sense of bravado and learned to hone his charm.
That’s the thing. He can charm anyone, but it’s all an act.
The goodness I saw in him early in our friendship is long gone. ”
“All he ever does is talk about how cool he is. Maybe overcompensating because he knows he’s a loser.” Cody goes hard on the stair stepper, so our conversation ends there.
We grab smoothies from the shop next door before I climb in my truck and head home, Beck on my mind. I heard from Jett that she’d had a sleepover last night with her girls, and I hoped they were able to boost her mood and show her a good time.
Jett had shown me a video of Sean being a filthy asshole on the dance floor last night, his hands up the shirt of some twenty-one-year-old, which had disgusted me.
Not that I thought he wouldn’t cheat on Nurse Q despite her being pregnant with his child, because I know Sean is motivated mostly by a challenge.
Once he’s gotten a woman, he bores easily, and it’s all about the next thrill.
It’s so clear to me now, I wonder how I hadn’t seen it more easily over the last years of his relationship with Beck.
I’d saved Sean’s ass one too many times and fed him sweet lines to say to Beck. Showed up at restaurants when he was about to stand her up. Reminded him how good he had it with Beck. The watch from last Christmas is a prime example.
I’m already pointing my truck in the direction of Beck’s house instead of mine, under the guise of dropping off boxes I’d gotten from a neighbor.
When I ring the bell, she throws the door open wearing a purple crop top that shows off her flat stomach and big, wide-legged gray sweatpants that she has rolled up at the bottom.
Her light gold hair sits atop her head in a messy knot, and she looks effortlessly perfect.
“Hey! What a surprise. Come on in.” Beck stands back and opens the door with a big smile. The urge to bend and kiss her is so strong, I have to take two deep breaths and let it pass.
“How was your girls’ night?” I kick off my sneakers and make my way to her fridge, where I’ll snatch one of Sean’s ungodly expensive electrolyte waters. It’s the last one, and I gulp it all down.
Beck gives a light laugh. “Sean will miss all the water that I’ve been drinking. I had a great night with the girls. Way too much tequila, though. I’ve taken like four Ibuprofen this morning, trying to combat my headache. Thankfully, it’s cloudy and dreary, because the sun would hurt my eyes.”
“Oof,” I groan. “Did you finally get out that good tequila you’ve had in the freezer for ages?”
“Yep, and it was incredible. You know, after it stopped burning.” Beck laughs and then beckons me to the bedroom.
“I’ve got a truck full of boxes,” I announce as she points to the bed at an array of jewelry, candles, photos of Beck and Sean, and other odds and ends.
“And I’ve got a bed full of presents from Sean to take to Goodwill. It’s that or burn them, but why do that when someone else can enjoy these things?”
That’s when I spot it—the watch. It’s rose-gold and just as perfect for Beck’s slim wrist as it was the day I purchased it for her from my favorite jeweler.
The watch was supposed to be her Christmas present.
Sean had seen it on my counter one day and commented how lovely it was, and asked if it was for my short-term girlfriend, Cassie.
When I told him it was for Aspyn, he got a sour look on his face and told me it was too expensive.
A few days later, he called me in a panic, asking if he could buy it off me to give to her as an anniversary present. A quick glance at the clock, which read 10 p.m, showed me that he’d nearly forgotten their nine-year anniversary.
“You can’t give this one away.” I pluck out the rose-gold watch and perch on the bed beside all her unwanted items. “This has a story you’re not aware of.”
So, I fill her in. Every little detail. “It was always from me, never from Sean,” I finish. “So, how about I help you put it on?”
Beck’s eyes are filled with unshed tears as she looks at me in wonder. “You did that for Sean?”
I look away. “Not Sean. For you. You didn’t deserve to be forgotten on your anniversary. All I really cared about was that it made you happy, whether it was from that prick or me.”
Beck paces in front of me for a minute before I see the tears streaming down her cheeks.
“I knew he didn’t pick it out. When he gave it to me, I kept thinking how well he knew me to have bought something so perfect for me.
Then, he apologized and said they were all out of gold, so he had to get me a rose-gold one, which is my favorite anyway.
I hadn’t heard a word from him all day, and then he shows up with this perfect watch at 11:09 p.m.?
Yeah, I remember the time, because I’d been waiting on him all day. It seemed too convenient.”
I watch Beck sniffle back her angry tears, and she suddenly turns to me, throwing her arms around me.
“I didn’t know how I was going to part with the amazing watch.
Thank you for telling me the truth about it, Deac.
Now, I’ll keep it and wear it proudly, with full awareness of who knows me well enough to have purchased it for me. Thank you.”
My arms encircle her, but Beck tosses herself against me, making me tip over.
She’s on top of me now, her chest pressed to mine with our legs hanging off the bed as she snuggles into my neck and sighs.
I don’t mind the feel of her salty, wet tears on me, nor the feeling of her heart hammering in her chest through my own skin.
“Of course it was you,” Beck whispers, inches from my ear. She presses her forehead to my cheek and reaches up to cup my other cheek with her palm. “You’re the best of men, Deacon Ambrose. You give me hope that not every guy is a selfish man whore.”
I should tell her how I feel, like my mother had begged me to do from her deathbed, but she’s less than one week out of the biggest breakup of her life.
So, all I do is whisper, “You deserve the world, Beck. You won’t settle again.”
She sniffles and slides off to my side, pressing her head to my shoulder as she exhales noisily.
“Living my life the way I want is my priority now, rather than replacing him with version 2.0. It feels so good to do exactly what I want, when I want to. Eat what I want—smoke when I want, without him overreacting about it and going on and on about the expensive drapes. Using a vibrator that’s bigger than him, when he was so insecure, I had to keep it hidden.
Ugh, I mean, I hope I won’t always be alone, but even that would be preferable to ending up with someone like Sean.
Did you see the video Jett took of him with his fingers on the nipples of a girl that couldn’t be older than college-aged? ”
She sits up, and I follow her lead. “Yes, I had that distinct pleasure this morning. Gag me, right?”
“Nurse Q at home waiting for him, and he still feels the need to pinch the nips of some hot coed?” Beck sends the most massive eye roll up at the ceiling. “Give me a fucking break. But it hit me last night. Yeah, he may be cheating, but at least it’s not on me.”
Beck shimmies a little, which makes me burst out laughing.
“No, it’s not.”
“Small favors. I couldn’t be more overjoyed about that,” Beck adds, doing a pirouette with a bright smile, making her look downright sunny, despite the tears she’d just cried. “By the way, I have pulled pork in the slow cooker. Do you smell it? It smells so good. Sean hated it when I ate pork.”
Man, Sean was a dick. How had it taken me so long to see it? Why had I made excuses over the years for him? A long history with someone is no reason to give them the benefit of the doubt instead of facing the cold, hard reality that they’re essentially a goblin from the depths of hell.
“Why are you smirking?” Beck asks, pinching my cheeks and staring up at me.
“Just picturing Sean as some Godzilla-like character rising from hell itself.” I chuckle as she roars with laughter.
“Love that stunning visual.” Beck sighs, and it sounds happy. “Anyway, do you want to bring in some boxes? I have piles everywhere but ran out of boxes yesterday.”
I do her bidding, which means building the boxes with clear packing tape and stuffing packing peanuts around all her breakable prized possessions, including the entire set of purple ceramic plates she’d purchased when she moved in.