Hana
I woke up to a steady beeping noise, my head feeling like I had a ton of bricks on each of my temples. I could barely open my eyes; my eyelids felt too heavy, like lead was keeping them shut. I tried to speak but my mouth wouldn’t open. Am I dead?
“Hana?”
My heart leapt through my chest—oh thank God, we’re reunited, the afterlife does exist. I felt his warm hands on my cheek and arm, the weight of his body next to mine. I could smell the paint on his clothes.
“Jack,” I croaked, using all of my strength to muster up the words when what I really wanted to do was jump up and into his arms.
“Sweetheart, I’m here. You’re okay. You’re gonna be okay,” he said quietly, his voice shaky. “You’re in the hospital. I’m not leaving your side.”
With his reassurance, I let my mind drift to a dreamless sleep.
* * *
I woke up suddenly in sheer panic, gasping for air. Was I still with Michael? Where was I? I came to when I realized that Jack was right next to me, taking my hand and speaking calmly to me. I didn’t register what he said; all I could do was break down in tears as I turned and saw my doe-eyed, beautiful husband next to me.
“Jack.” I sobbed, squeezing his hand with mine.
“Hello, sweetheart.” He smiled, tears welling in his eyes.
“Is this real? Am I alive?” I asked, still feeling spacey and out of it; I was sure I was drugged up on something, especially after feeling the IV in my hand when I squeezed his.
Jack chuckled next to me. Fuck, I missed his laugh. I missed his voice. I missed him.
“Yes, love. You’re alive. You’ve been practically asleep for almost two days, though,” he explained. “I haven’t left your side. Except for the loo.” He smiled, revealing the dimples that I loved so much.
Tears streamed down my face as I laughed. My ribs hurt with the motion, making me wince.
“What happened?” I asked curiously.
Jack sighed heavily. “What’s the last thing you remember?” His face was serious again.
I shook my head. It came back to me suddenly. Oh fuck.
“I…I tried to crash us into another car.” I stared at him, horrified.
Jack nodded knowingly.
“Is he…?” I asked after a moment. I don’t know why I asked, or why I cared, but I needed to know.
Jack sighed again. “He’s fine, Hana. He’s in the county jail, though. He walked away from the accident barely scathed,” he explained, looking disappointed.
It was over. Oh my God. No more choosing, no more guilt, no more second guessing myself. The horrible monster was out of my life. I still felt a twinge deep in my chest; was I mourning the loss of the person I thought I loved?
“What about…the other car?” I suddenly felt tremendous guilt. All I thought about was ending mine and Michael’s lives, not anyone else’s safety.
“They swerved out of the way. They’re fine. You and Michael spun into a tree,” Jack explained quietly.
I could see Jack’s mind working, keeping something back from me.
“What?” I asked, suddenly nervous.
He hesitated. “I never thought I’d see you again,” he breathed out. “I almost took my own life, Hana.”
The beeping on the monitor quickly sped up, a reflection of my heart almost exploding with sorrow.
“I thought you would have. I wanted to go too if I couldn’t see you again,” I cried, realizing I was squeezing his hand again.
Jack shook his head, his tears finally releasing. He put his hand to my cheek and leaned down to get closer to me.
“I would have followed you, even in death, my love.”
He pulled me in for a kiss, his lips desperate as he lifted me and held me close to him. I used every single last ounce of my energy to kiss him back. The pieces of my heart were finally together again.