Chapter 17 Diesel
SEVENTEEN
DIESEL
Movement from the table is slow, guarded, but no one’s throwing punches or spilling blood. I hang back, watching the others filter out like soldiers heading back to the front lines. No one speaks to me, but no one blocks the door either.
I keep my back to the wall, just in case, tapping my teeth until only Nic is left in the room. He catches my eye.
“You good?” I nod, even though I’m not sure I am. Never show weakness. “I’m glad you’re here, brother.”
I blink. Then do it again as he leaves the room. At least I have one person in my corner.
No, two.
Makenna.
I head back to the living room, my pace faster with each step. I should have left first. I should have—
Her laugh rings out ahead of me. It’s the one she uses when she’s trying to blend in or make people like her. I stop in the doorway, boots planted hard like my legs don’t want to work.
She’s sitting on the couch, not quite relaxed, but not freaking out either. Dayna is snorting and wheezing through whatever story she’s telling while Ivy rolls her eyes.
Everything else is static in my brain but her. She’s breathing. Unharmed, not bleeding.
And she looks like she belongs here with them. She just… fits.
Her gaze lifts suddenly and locks to mine, like she senses me. The little lift of her lips into a hint of a smile nearly floors me and when she stands, I watch every step she takes until she’s in front of me.
She smells like home. Like safety. Like mine.
I grab her hand and guide her to the end of the hallway, away from the noise and eyes that don’t trust me.
My hands skim up her biceps, as if I expect to feel wounds under her sweater.
She’s okay. You’re okay.
Still, I have to ask it. “You alright?”
Her hands go to my chest, smoothing over my shirt, skimming the leather of my kutte. “I like the girls. They’re kind of crazy but… I think they might be my kind of crazy. Are you okay?”
I lean my forehead against hers, letting all the tension seep out of me. “No.”
She grips my face, forcing me to lift my head. To look at her. “What happened?”
I don’t answer that. Instead, I murmur, “I love you.”
“I love you too,” she whispers like a fucking vow.
It punches through my chest. I don’t deserve her, but fuck, I’m keeping her.
“We’re making our move soon,” I say, hating that I have to destroy her mood.
Her fingers flex against my chest, her breath hitching as her eyes slide shut. “Right. Okay.” She swallows. “Shit.”
That look on her face is a fist beneath my ribs. The mix of worried panic hurts like a knife to the gut.
So I kiss her. It’s the only thing I can think of to stop the static buzzing through my mind. It’s not soft, it is not desperate either. It’s a marking, an imprint on her soul that tells her body that she belongs to me.
Makenna’s lips brush against mine like she’s trying to savour every last moment, like she thinks this could be the last time we get to kiss like this.
Fuck that. I’m coming home no matter what.
“Promise you’ll be careful,” she says. “No heroics, okay?”
“No heroics,” I agree. Loud laughter reverberates through the walls, breaking through the heavy tension leaching out of the walls.
“I see why you wanted this for us,” she admits softly. “The girls… they have this bond with each other.”
I kiss her temple. I can’t stop touching her. “They’re good women.”
“And you’re a good man, Zane.” Her eyes are shiny when she says it. “Don’t let your friends get in your head. You’re the most loyal person I’ve ever known and they’ll see that eventually.”
The rumble of an engine cuts through the moment like a hammer blow. Ravage. Brothers. More soldiers to fight in this civil war.
I step in front of her, shielding her with my body as Nic yells from the other room, confirming what I suspected. “They’re here.”
Makenna flinches. “You have to leave.”
I nod, tucking a loose piece of hair behind her ear. We never needed words growing up and we don’t need them now. I see her fear, feel it down to my marrow, and I wrap my arms around her, giving her what she needs to feel safe.
Warmth. Pressure. My girl. My wife.
“You know what to do if things go wrong.”
Her eyes snap to me. “Don’t. Nothing is going wrong.
” Her fingers fist into my shirt, like she can keep me anchored to existence with just her hold.
Her breath is warm against my throat, shaky and uneven.
“You do whatever it takes to come back to me.” Her eyes fill with tears.
“If you find yourself in the dark, Zane, you remember I’m the light that always guides you home. ”
Fuck. She might as well have punched me in the chest. We’d been younger, different when I said those words to her, but they still ring true all these years later.
I kiss the tip of her nose. “My little firefly.”
I don’t want to leave her, but I have to.
I tap the tips of my finger and thumb together as I memorise every inch of her face.
The curve of her jaw, the fullness of that mouth that ruins me every time she opens it.
Her lips press together, like she’s trying not to fall apart.
She doesn’t cry, but she’s close to losing it.
I don’t blink or breathe or think. I just stare at her like if I look hard enough, I can carry her with me through whatever is ahead.
Then I give her one last kiss. One last moment.
It’s not goodbye because I’m coming back. I promised her I would. But it’s a ‘just in case’.
Then I step back, even though it breaks me to do it and I walk out of that house, away from my wife, my soul without looking back. I can’t. If I do I won’t leave and I have to.
The air is too sharp when I step out of the house. The door slams shut behind me like a guillotine. This is it. No more delays. No more promises. Just the final battle.
The driveway is overcrowded with cars and bodies. Two white vans are now parked behind the other vehicles.
I keep my distance from Riot and the others, watching as our national president climbs out of the front van.
Ravage is built like he can move mountains with his bare hands and he carries himself like nothing can touch him. A man used to taking control, giving orders and them being followed.
Behind him is Nox, vice president of the London Sons. He’s no less intimidating, and his sharp eyes take everyone in with a sweeping glance. When they flick over me, I swear it feels like he sees down to my bones.
Ravage swaggers over to Nic like he owns the air between them.
His eyes narrow a fraction, like he’s scanning Nic’s mind. “You good?”
Nic nods. “Still standin’.”
Both men are steady, strong, a force to be reckoned with. Two giants facing a common enemy together. Our national president, and the man we’ve put a stolen crown on.
“Ready to do this?”
There’s a beat, not of doubt, but just to weigh the gravity of what we’re doing. Nic sighs. “Ready to get it done.”
Ravage grins, then pulls him into a hug. It’s fierce, and a message. It’s respect and it’s permission. Nic has the support of the Sons, not just the men standing behind him.
“Your boy Dash okay?”
“No, but he will be. How many men you brought?”
“Enough to cause some shit.” He grimaces. “I hate that it’s come to this.”
“Me too,” Nic says.
Ravage flicks his gaze to me. He strips me down to the bone with just his eyes, but he’s done assessing me. He steps in close enough that I can smell leather and oil. I don’t flinch or blink as his head tilts just a fraction to the side.
“I don’t like secrets,” he says, “and I don’t like liars.” My chest tightens into a knot. “Not when you’re wearin’ my club on your back, Diesel.”
I hold his gaze, my eyes burning. “I protected my wife,” I say quietly.
“What about your club?”
“I’m still here. Still fighting for my club.”
His eyes narrow and my jaw tics. I want to tell him I’d make the same choice every fucking time. That he would’ve done the same if it was Sasha in Makenna’s place. But I say nothing. Because this isn’t the time, and Ravage doesn’t give two fucks about my excuses, only loyalty.
His expression doesn’t change. “You lie again and I’ll have your kutte. Maybe your life.”
He moves on like he didn’t just threaten to kill me, the warning hanging in the air like smoke. I let the breath trapped in my lungs out just enough to ease the pain in my chest.
And when Ravage calls for everyone to move out, I follow because this is still my club and despite what everyone thinks, I will bleed for the patch.